I hate watching you destroy yourself. I can see it, the drugs are wrecking you from the inside out. You won’t listen to me, they’ve closed your ears off to the sound of the voice you claimed to love. I know this isn’t you, I know that the person I’m seeing is a shell of who you really are, but that doesn’t alleviate the pain that tears through my body as I watch you break down in pursuit of your next hit. I wonder whose pain is worse? I wish I could fix you. I can’t. I know I can’t. Don’t push me away, please. At least let me do this much, at least let me catch the pieces of you that I can.
Maxwell Diawuoh, Request: I’m in love with a drug addict and I just have to watch him suffer because he won’t accept help. He really is an amazing person but he’s just clouded right now and it’s honestly shattering watching him destroy himself. He’s pushing me away.
I think it would be romantic to always be on the lookout for the perfect reading spot with your significant other. Some people love movies together, others travel together. I want to look for reading spots together.
sex hotline au where muse a is a phone sex operator and muse b is an awkward freshman in college who wants a taste before stepping out into the real world. what’s meant to be a five minute phone call turns into an hour long fest, featuring several mind-blowing orgasms and learning more about each other than professionally appropriate. muse b gets a part time job just to pay for their possibly harmful sex addiction (or just addiction to muse a’s voice) and the two converse regularly for months. one day, muse b hears an oh-so-familiar voice ordering coffee in the line in front of them.
cliché best friend’s older brother plot where muse a is infatuated with their best friend’s older brother muse b, who they see occasionally when they’re over to study or for a sleepover. when muse a is a freshman and at their first high school party, they have their first kiss who’s later discovered to be muse b. muse b rejects muse a as soon as they’re confronted, which leaves muse a heartbroken until muse b goes off to college. three years later muse a gets accepted to the same college as muse b, and they see each other once again.
classical musician au? like muse a is a highly acclaimed classical musician (piano/violin/etc) who’s lost sight of their love for music, where their entire life revolves around their profession and being technically flawless but bland. muse b is a busker barely making rent every month, and when muse a hears muse b playing outside a coffee shop one day they’re completely captivated by muse b’s music. it’s a love for music they haven’t felt in ages, which is why muse a makes a quick move to get to know this struggling street musician.
private school au where it’s the holidays and muse a and muse b are the only two students staying at school during the break. it’s quite awkward as they’ve never so much as talked before, but their secret admiring glances at each other haven’t gone unnoticed by other students. their first conversation results in a snowball fight and they spend the entire break glued at the hip.
celebrity plot where muse a and muse b are both successful musicians with humongous fan-bases. muse a tweets an insult about muse b’s favorite movie and muse b decides to take a jab at muse a’s music. what starts as a fun feud gets blown up by the fans, to the point where there’s blogs and accounts dedicated to the two of them getting together.
radio host au where muse a is the familiar voice of reason on the university’s popular radio station. muse b admires from afar, from the ace music choices to the heartfelt advice that muse a always seems to have for their listeners. muse b is harshly dumped by their girlfriend/boyfriend one night, and decides to call in to their favorite radio station to whine. the conversation lasts longer than the allotted time for a single caller. on air flirting is a legitimate thing, right?
hospital au where muse a is a volunteer at the local hospital because they like to help out, reading children stories and helping them color. muse b is spoiled and bratty with a set of famous parents, and after getting arrested for their reckless behavior muse b’s parents order them to help out with the hospital in order to improve their reputation. at first muse b walks around like they own the place because of their parent’s significant donations to the hospital, but muse a refuses to give in to muse b’s absurd demands. muse b learns sympathy and muse a learns that people really can change.
This discussion is not based on morality. It is based exclusively upon observation of the human mind. Our mental states are solely chemical based. We are just machines after all. Nature has provided us with various means of reaching states which may be called pleasurable. Animals seek pleasure and wish to avoid pain. The things which in nature give us pleasure are those things which are generally good for us. We take pleasure in sex, food, rest, drink and even things less tangible such as success at the things we do.
Humans, being the clever little apes that we are soon learned ways to short-circuit the pleasure systems in our brain through the use of chemicals which mimic natural pleasures such as alcohol, opium, and cocaine. The problem with sense pleasures of these kinds is that we are designed to become accustomed to these sensations and to build tolerances to them requiring more. The reason is purely electrochemical.
The upshot of this is that if we attempt to chase pleasure without balance and moderation the system breaks down and we fall into addiction and our health suffers and the pleasure becomes harder and harder to attain. Moreover, on a psychological level, we cease to find contentment and we find ourselves increasingly depressed and anxious which leads to further attempts to cure this with sense pleasures which lead to a further degradation of the system.
There is a different source of pleasure which we may call joy. Joy cannot be attained through artificial means. Joy comes from leading a life of the spirit. This joy does not tear our body down rather it increases our overall health and contentment. We do not build a tolerance to joy. The more we have the greater our sense of contentment and well-being.
Book Reviews : Strange The Dreamer by Laini Taylor
This was such a beautiful book for people who love books and reading. As I expected, the author’s lyrical way of writing set the tone beautifully. The world the created was so deep and dark and I have no complaints about the characters.
I have a lot of books on my to-read list. It’s a list I might never get to finish because I’m always adding more and more and more books.
But to be completely honest, I’m okay with that because even if I never get to them, I know I’ve acknowledged that those books once interested me enough to add them to my list.
Long TBRs create anxiety, but I also remember the joy I felt when I first heard of the books I’ve added to my possibly impossible list. For that fleeting moment, as I read a promising synopsis, I was intrigued and excited. That’s a feeling I’m okay reliving.