murder problem

it’s funny how straight ppl romanticize “forbidden” love. they think it’s soooooo endearing and fun and exciting when in reality, their gay peers are having to literally hide their relationships bc of safety. we have to hide ourselves and our lovers bc we could get murdered. we have to hide bc we’re afraid of getting fired. we have to hide sometimes bc we have to, not bc it’s some office romance that’s hush hush.

it’s not fun, it’s not exciting, it’s fucking terrifying and it hurts bc we can’t hold our datemate’s hand in public - bc we could be killed.

Bisexual Haircut Discourse??

I’m not sure how discourse works so stay tuned. 

The bisexual haircut is cool and all but I’ve been thinking about how I have natural hair and a thick afro and can’t participate in that. So i would like to add the Bisexual Afro ™.

Here are some examples of the Bisexual Afro ™

Keep reading

9

Hercule Poirot, a cinnamon roll

I think possibly the most twisted side of Hannibal and Will’s relationship, but also the one that shows the most how they’re made for each other and pretty much no one else, is how they get each other’s sense of humor, in whatever form it comes. Hannibal sees Will’s bitter misanthropic sarcasm and is endeared by it, instead of kept at a distance by it like everybody else; Will should really not find Hannibal’s irony funny since it mostly involves murdering and eating people, stabbing, or making victims into art, but he tragically does. To the point that it gets him to smile, laugh, turn a dead man into a firefly, or watch an asshole eat his own face.

INTPs and 'Can't'

INTP: So I’m thinking of luring an asshole out into the woods so I can find out the inner mechanics of the human body on a live specimen, that way I can also have a bit of an understanding on the degrees of pain on the body-

ENFP: YOU CAN’T DO THAT!

INTP: *cocks eyebrow*

ENFP: … you shouldn’t do that?

INTP: Better.

ENFP: You’re not actually going to do it though… right?

INTP: Obviously not, killers get caught. Even if it’s only when they’re old and grey. I wouldn’t do well in jail.

ENFP: Ya, you’d get bored and actually go insane.

INTP: What? Why would I be worried about that? Sanity is relative. No, no, my problem would be all the people!

ENFP: Of course. Yes. Because that’s the sane thing to be concerned about with going to jail.

INTP: *waves dismissively* The point is I don’t want to go there.

Why I Quit German

WARNINGS: This story is really gross and/or horrifying but also hilarious imho.  Your health always comes first, so mind the tags:  Violence, Cannibalism Mention, Suicidal Ideation, Feces, Sleep Deprivation, Airplanes, I generally had a really bad time but now it’s hysterical.  Most of the story is under the cut because it’s eight miles long.


In August of 2009 I flew back to Honolulu to do my sophomore year of college with the intention of entering 400-level german. What happened instead is the closest I’ve ever come to personally dying or actually murdering someone.

The problem started the day before my flight, when I attended a birthday party for a very dear cousin in Denver, and due to be in 1 of 2 adults present, ended up driving a bunch of teenagers home and didn’t get home until 12:30 that night.  Oh well, my flight’s at 6AM anyway, I’ll just stay up. I can sleep on the plane, I thought, like a complete fucking fool.

Keep reading

hannigram on the run, rewatching sherlock season finale always makes them feel so lucky
sherlock looks more like #just-bros-lock at this point

Does anybody else feel like shows purposely put pauses in so we can make commentary?

I mean come on, it does not take that long to make a response to something. Real conversation moves very quickly.


They want us to say and do things like this:

Originally posted by n-wordbelike

Originally posted by crimsonlippedbeast

Originally posted by dekushrubindustry

Originally posted by andiwaslikewut

Originally posted by toqaahmed

Originally posted by kimberlylemon

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

Originally posted by totheskyirise

Seriously they do it for a reason.

When you accidentally pit your characters against an antagonist they have no chance of defeating;

While creating the antagonist: Hell yes! All the powers! I want this to be the most supremely OP antagonist ever!

While trying to keep your main characters from being killed by the antagonist: Oh god… what have I done…

10

Bonus:


THIS ISN’T EVEN THE MOST EXTRA THING HE’S EVER DONE.
He turns a regular doll into a talking ‘ventriloquist’ doll to bait the murderer.
#SAVAGE

“Mesdames et messieurs, what am I about to do may surprise you a little. It may occur to you that I am eccentric, perhaps mad. Ah, you may say, “The little Belgian detective is taking leave of his rocker, ” eh? But I can assure you, behind my madness is, as you English say… method.”

Fandom vs Canon (Diabolik Lovers)

Fandom Shu: Lazy closet pervert who loves music and his s/o, likes bathing with his clothes on

Canon Shu: Lazy open pervert with PTSD who wrestled a fucking polar bear and can probably kill everyone in the room if he wanted to. Scared to death of loss. Extreme sadist, cuts you with a knife because your blood tastes better when you’re scared.


Fandom Reiji: BDSM mom friend, likes collecting plates

Canon Reiji: Pessimistic sadist with a sibling oriented inferiority complex. Had no problem murdering his own mother and even wanted to resurrect her so he could kill her in a more painful way each time. Burned down a village to kill his brother’s best friend. Could kill you in your sleep and wouldn’t blink twice.


Fandom Ayato: Lovable and confident dork who likes memes, boobs and takoyaki.

Canon Ayato: Do-S with an extreme superiority and inferiority complex. Abused and pressured to beat Shu as the heir to the vampire throne. Thrown into a lake to drown by his mother, ended up murdering her out of hatred and smiled the entire time. Sleeps in a fucking iron maiden. Will probably snap your neck if you don’t call him Ore-sama.


Fandom Kanato: Smol screaming child, bipolar, will like you if you make him deserts

Canon Kanato: Neglected sadist, quite possibly with Aspergers, with severe distrust towards other people, bordering on paranoia. Has sex with you more than any guy in the game, eats the ashes of his dead mother when he gets panic attacks. Might stab you in the throat with a fork if he doesn’t like your desert.


Fandom Laito: Macaroon fedora pervert, constant boner, “Bitch-chan~”

Canon Laito: Confuses love with lust due to being sexually abused by his own mother, was thrown in a dungeon by his father when he found out. He killed her so she could “be with him in eternity.” Manipulative and incredibly clever, voyeuristic with a degrading kink. His personality can turn dark in less than a second. Will use your fears to break you.


Fandom Subaru: Angry emo trash but is actually a cinnamon roll. Likes Blink 182, MCR, and punching wall-chan

Canon Subaru: Extreme sadist who ended up being an incest child because his dad used him as his mom as an experiment. Was called a filthy abomination by his mother who he loved more than anyone, now has a distrust towards women and constant suicidal thoughts.


Fandom Ruki: Hot mysterious book worm who’s into BDSM. Secretly cares about you and loves you.

Canon Ruki: Hot mysterious book worm who has been abusing people since he was seven years old. Was abandoned by his mother and his father killed himself, forcing him to live in the street. Warped perception of companionship, fear of abandonment, treats you like livestock because he was branded like cattle.

Fandom Kou: Prancy dancy idol-chan, sweet but manipulative, listens to BTS


Canon Kou: Abandoned at birth, turned into a sadist due to the amount of abuse he endured as a child. Ripped out his own eye to escape border line slavery and tried to commit suicide multiple times. Manipulative, will always expect something in exchange from you, capable of a 180 personality flip and won’t hesitate to kill when he’s angry.


Fandom Yuma: Giant gardening teddy bear, sugar-chan~ rebellious in a hot way

Canon Yuma: Can and will snap you in half. Beaten by his parents for not praying to God. Watched his parents burn alive and joined a gang, living on the streets. Sold himself as a slave to just to make enough money to survive. Sadistic, perverted, hot headed and can go on a total rampage. Kills you or someone else in almost all of his dark ends.


Fandom Azusa: Sweet masochist cinnamon bun who collects knives, doesn’t say much

Canon Azusa: Extreme masochist and sadist who enjoys self harm and harming others. Cuts you because he “wants you to feel good.” Enjoyed getting beaten as a child. Pain keeps him alive and gives him purpose, borderline suicidal.

(I might do more of these for other fandoms as well~)