multi levelled

Concept: an RPG setting where the ruling class consists of talking spiders with a penchant for fancy hats. Not anthropomorphic spiders - just regular-looking spiders, about the size of a largeish dog, that are sapient and capable of speech. The setting isn’t a horrifying arachnid dystopia or anything; it’s actually a fairly conventional high fantasy milieu, except that all the royals, most of the hereditary nobility, and a fair chunk of the gentry are spiders, with all the cultural strangeness that implies.

(Stairs are considered lower class - the spiders climb, of course - so wealthy humans build multi-level dwellings with no stairs and develop their free-climbing skills in order to imitate their eight-legged neighbours. The spiders, for their part, pointedly ignore the handholds cunningly disguised as decorative moulding, because it’s rude to draw attention to a person’s disability.)

“So, where’s your LGBT fiction?”

It’s no big secret that a large portion of the LGBT fiction market is online. Many books aren’t even available in print, which I know frustrates some readers (and authors!) who would like to find books in bookstores, libraries, etc. And heck, some people just like paperbacks.

But they aren’t in bookstores. Not in significant numbers, anyway. Even as larger publishers branch out into LGBT, they’re sticking to ebooks.

After talking to publishers, agents, authors, and booksellers over the years, I’ve come to understand one of the primary reasons for this is, quite simply, that queer lit doesn’t sell in bookstores.

With that in mind, I went on a mission this week. I visited five bookstores around Seattle and Portland - Powell’s, Half Price Books, and Barnes & Noble - and I asked the same question: “Where would I find the LGBT fiction?”



This is the LGBT Fiction and Non-Fiction section at a Barnes & Noble. The entire section.

But you know what’s extra aggravating?

This is where I found it:

I mean, great. Glad it’s near LGBT & Gender Identity (Though it’s literally the bottom shelf. The top three are Native American and African American non-fiction, which apparently are part of Cultural Studies but don’t warrant a sign despite occupying ¾ of the space…? IDK.)

Signage weirdness notwithstanding, look what section I’m in. I mean, if you’re looking for LGBT Fiction, you’d expect to look…in the….fiction section, right?

No. It’s in the non-fiction section. This is the view of the fiction section from the LGBT section:

Those are Graphic Novels, followed by SFF, followed by Romance. So if you’re in the mood for Gay Romance, you’re not even in the right ZIP code if you start perusing the romance section.

And if I wander over to the fiction section and look toward the LGBT section…

That far wall? The shelf with the LGBT books is perpendicular to that.

See what I’m getting at? There are literally only three ways someone will find the LGBT fiction section at Barnes & Noble:

1. Ask. Which is fabulous for people who are closeted, kids who aren’t comfortable asking, and people who don’t even know the genre exists.

2. Stumble across it. Which you’re totally going to do if you’re looking for a novel because you’d absolutely wander out of the fiction section to find one.

3. Already know where it is.

Can’t imagine why LGBT fiction doesn’t sell.

At Powell’s, the situation wasn’t any better. Powell’s is enormous. It’s multi-level with color-coded rooms because it’s just….huge. I made a valiant attempt to find the LGBT Fiction on my own, but after a full hour of browsing, including scouring all the rooms containing fiction, I finally had to go ask.

There was a reason I couldn’t find it - it wasn’t in any of the rooms dominated by fiction.

It was in the room with all the history books, tucked back behind Military History. Because God knows that’s where I go looking when I want some LGBT fiction.

To their credit, Powell’s had an impressively large section, and it was decorated with a gigantic rainbow sign….but what good does that do anyone if they can’t find the section?

Finally, Half Price Books. Behold, the entire Gay & Lesbian Fiction section:

And yep, that’s the non-fiction section. The Gender Studies and Anthropology section. All the non-queer fiction was downstairs. Not even on the same floor.

So…you know…I think I might’ve figured out why LGBT Fiction “doesn’t sell very well in print,” and what a shock….it’s not because people don’t want to read it.


Check out these multi-level waterfalls, Takamaka Waterfall, Reunion Island

anonymous asked:

I'm intending to move out of my mom's by fall, but I have two cats, and idk much about how to care for them on my own. I want to do it right, but I'm not very good with figuring out vet info or other care stuff for them.

Okay, so I’ve just spent the last two hours writing this post for you, in the hopes that you will change your mind. It’s way longer than I intended, but I tried to be thorough and comprehensive. Know that I have strong opinions about how to raise cats because they’re a huge part of my life. You might not agree with what I have to say, but this is what’s worked for me. I urge you to try different things and find out what works best for you! Before I get into it, let me talk about my cats…

I have a four year old orange tabby (Mason) and a sixteen year old tortoiseshell cat (Gretel) pictured in Appendix D. They have completely opposite personalities (Mason is super confident and talkative, Gretel is more standoffish) and they did NOT get along for the longest time. I’ve been with Gretel since she was three years old, so we’re very close and she’s very protective of me. After we moved into our current apartment, my boyfriend and I bought Mason to keep Gretel company. He was a rescue cat that had been previously returned after being adopted once, because he was “fresh”. He gave me the runaround when he first moved in, so I understand what it’s like to have a difficult cat.

It’s taken two years for them to both be comfortable with each other, but last week they fell asleep on the bed together (see Appendix D) and it was so beautiful. These cats have brought so much joy into my life, and I don’t know where I’d be without them. All these experiences, good and bad, have taught me that I never want to live without cats in my life.

Please feel free to direct message me if you want to talk about what taking care of cats on your own will mean for you. I am here for all your cat needs!

The Complete Guide to Living on Your Own (With Cats)

Phase 1: Your New Apartment

Before moving into your new home, follow these steps to make the process as comfortable as possible for your cats. You need to understand that they will be upset and act strange for the first few days, and this is absolutely normal and expected. Give them time- they’ll adjust.

1. Move the cats last. Move everything else you own into your new apartment, and get it set up as much as you can before moving your cats. Make sure there are plenty of places for them to hide that are easily accessible, like under your bed or in the back of a closet. Initially your cats will be very shell-shocked, and it will be easier for them to adjust if they smell familiar furniture and are able to find a secure place to hide.

2. Feliway. Buy yourself Feliway and spray it on walls and around doorways at your kitty’s eye level. I can’t tell you what it is or why it works (Science Side of Tumblr please explain), but your cats smell it and will feel much calmer. Feliway also helps when your cat starts peeing on everything, see Phase 2: Tantrums.

3. Moving your cats. If you have two cats, make sure that you move both cats at the same time. Even if they’re not the best of pals, a familiar face in a time of stress will soothe them. In the car ride they will cry, drool, pee, and sound like they’re dying. This is horrible to hear, but no that it’s only temporary. If you were in their situation you would act the same way! 

Hyperventilating. If you hear your cat start to hyperventilate, move them out of the carrier and comfort them immediately. I was transporting a cat with a high fever to the vet once and he started to do this, so I literally pulled over and drove with the cat in my lap the rest of the way. Once in my lap, he relaxed and started to breathe normally. The vet told me that I was lucky I did this, because the cat could’ve had a heart-attack. 

4. In the new apartment. Open your cat carrier and allow your cats to explore their new home at their own pace. Depending on your cat’s confidence, they might make a beeline for your bed and hide under it for the next two days. This is absolutely fine. Your cats may not want to eat or use the bathroom during these first few days, and this is normal. You often won’t eat if you’re stressed out, so understand that when they’re hungry, they’ll eat. If one of your cats is very upset, place their food and water bowl in the room they’re hiding in, so that they won’t feel threatened while they eat. 

5. Give it time. This could be less than a day or over a week, but your cat will come out from their hiding space of their own accord. They will walk around their new home and take everything in, and they’ll make themselves comfortable. Be there for your cat during this time, offering encouragement and love as they need it. It’s okay if they come out and retreat back to their safe hiding space, tell yourself that they will come out again.

Phase 2: Tantrums

Cats are mostly independent animals, but they do require lots of love and attention. Expect at least one or all of these tantrums to be thrown when you move them into your new home. Your cats are in a new environment that they are not wholly comfortable with, so it’s important to be patient and help them through this difficult time. 

1. Pooping. Your cat has an excellent sense of smell- they know where their litter box is. If they’re choosing to poop outside of the box, they are most likely looking for attention. Make sure that the poop has no blood in it (see Phase 4: Veterinarians + Common Diseases) and spend time making your cat feel special. This includes treats, playtime, combing, whatever they like best. 

2. Peeing A. Peeing is a form of scenting, which is essentially your cat being like “this is mine”. Your cats will probably do this a lot when you first move in, so make sure you have the proper cleaners ready (see Appendix A). Clean the spot thoroughly, and spray Feliway all over it. Your cat will smell the Feliway and think “Okay, I peed there already” and walk on. I’m not kidding. 

3. Peeing B. Peeing can also be an cry for attention, slightly different from scenting. Here’s how to tell the difference- does your cat only pee when you’re around? Typically this will only be done in areas that you frequent, like your bed or your couch. If so, then this is a cry for attention- see “Pooping”.

4. Peeing C. Is your cat declawed? I sure hope not, because that’s inhumane. But anyways, if it is… declawed cats require a different type of litter than the normal Tidy Cats brand. Call your local vet and consult with them about the best types of litter to use. 

5. Attacking. Is your cat attacking people/places/things? Get toys and play with them. Cats are evolved from fearsome predators, they need to be stimulated or they’ll get bored and start hunting whatever they can find. Here are some great toys to buy your cats so that they can “hunt” on their own, there’s something in there for every cat type.

Phase 3: A Place For Everyone

Jackson Galaxy is the Cat Guru, and you can find episodes of his show “My Cat From Hell” on Netflix. Whenever Jackson enters a home of a troublesome cat, he always looks at the environment in terms of how “cat-proof” it is. Your cat needs to have their own stuff, and whether this is a cardboard box or a $150 piece of cat furniture, it needs to be there. 

1. Bush vs. Tree dweller. I have a bush dweller and a tree dweller! Bush dwellers are the cats that like to hang out under tables and under beds, and they’re thought to be cats with less self-confidence. Tree dwellers like to climb and look down on their surroundings, reconnecting with their ancestors in the jungle. Cater your apartment based off of your cat’s needs. See Phase 6: Miscellaneous to learn more about different cat personalities. 

A word on bush dwellers. I was initially very upset to learn that Gretel is considered a low self-esteem cat. I kept trying to think of ways to make her more comfortable her surroundings, in the hopes that she would one day want to climb things and perch up high. Since getting Mason, she has slowly become a bush/tree dweller. She now climbs to the top rung of her cat furniture, and asks me to help her up on the kitchen table (it’s tall so she can’t jump). What I’m trying to say is that cats will gain confidence as they get more comfortable with their surroundings, and having a second and way more confident cat has helped her come into herself, even in her old age. So proud of my baby.

2. Cat furniture. I’m not going to lie to you, cat furniture is hella expensive. But it’s life-changing. Your cats recognize that its a piece of furniture for them, and they will run right over to it and begin exploring. If your cat is wary about climbing to the higher platforms or levels of the furniture, entice them with treats or a toy. The general rule is one piece of furniture per cat, because they will fight over them. If you have a very active cat, I’d recommend getting a multi-leveled piece. 

3. Cardboard boxes. The rumors are true- cats love cardboard boxes. Just open it up and leave it in the middle of the floor, and allow your cats to explore. If you’re not ready to drop $$$, place a warm blanket in the box and allow your cats to curl up. 

4. Windows. If you leave for work, leave your blinds open for your cats to peer out. If you don’t, they’ll peer out anyway and wreck your blinds. In the summer time it might seem like a nice idea to leave your windows partially open, but always make sure that your window screens are secure. If they’re not, add masking tape around the sides of the window until you can press on the screen and it doesn’t collapse.

5. Food and water. I like to keep a bowl of water in each room for the cats, and I refresh this daily. I like to add ice cubes in the summer so that the water isn’t that awful room temperature. If you feed your cats dry food, make sure that they’re drinking lots of water after eating. 

6. Litter box. Yeah, I know- it’s the worst part of being a cat owner. I keep mine in my hallway closet, and I leave the door partially open so that the cats can get in and out as they please. I’ve seen people with litter boxes in their bathrooms, their hallways, behind chairs in their living room, etc. The general rule is to have one more litter box than there is cat. I’m sorry, that’s crazy talk. I have a one bedroom apartment and I’m not having three litter boxes. One has worked fine for my babies, I just have to be vigilant about cleaning it. 

As far as choosing a cat litter brand, most cats are not picky. Some, however, are. Tidy Cats is expensive so I use whatever is on sale at CVS. I prefer scented because I have the litter box right by my front door. Find what works for you, but listen to your cat’s needs. 

Be wary of any brand of “lightweight” cat litter other than Tidy Cats. One time I bought Stop & Shop’s “Companion” lightweight litter and it hardened and stuck to the bottom of my litter box and I literally had to rehydrate it to remove it. DISGUSTING. 

7. Wall furniture. If you don’t have a lot of room on the floor of your apartment, consider putting up wall furniture for your cat. This can be anything from an expensive piece like this, or a simple wooden board for your cats to walk on. 

8. The floor is lava. Confident cats like to be up high on tables, window sills, cat furniture, etc. This is because back in their ancestral days, they had to peer down from the treetops to hunt their prey. Allow your cat this luxury, and try not to freak out if they walk on your kitchen counters or sit on your dining room table. Your cat is programmed to do this, the fact that your cat wants to be up high is a sign of confidence, a sign that your cat is comfortable with their surroundings. 

Phase 4: Veterinarians + Common Diseases

Your cat’s health is so important! There are lots of things you can do to maintain your cat’s health on your own (see Appendix B), but know that you will need to take one or both of your cats to the vet sometime this year. Remember to consult medical professionals if your cat is visibly ill. I am not a medical professional, but here are some of the things I’ve dealt with as a cat owner.

1. Hospitals vs. Doctors. My biggest expense as a cat owner is taking my babies to the vet. I have a Veterinary Hospital literally two minutes from my home, and Gretel hates the car so much that I always just take her there to get her to calm down. In general, hospitals are WAY more expensive than regular vet’s offices. Like, I’m talking over $100 difference. The expense is worth it for me, but it might not be for you. Find your closest vet office and put their number into your phone ASAP.

2. Making an appointment. If your cat is having a crisis, you can call during normal business hours and bring your cat in right then and there, but it’s going to cost you extra money. If your cat is not in imminent danger, call and make an appointment for the next day.

Theoretically, you’re supposed to bring your cat(s) or yearly check-ups and make sure they get all their vet shots. I’m gonna level with you- I don’t do this. I wish I could afford to do it, but I live paycheck to paycheck and can’t. You need to be able to take care of yourself, so if you’re poor like me, I’d advise saving vet visits for emergencies only. 

3. Vet insurance. Obviously- I do not have vet insurance. This means that I pay for all my vet visits out of pocket, and vet offices do not allow you to pay in installments, you have to pay all at once. My downstairs neighbor once had her cat held by a vet’s office because she didn’t have the money to pay for the vet bills. She had to get an emergency loan from her bank to be able to pay and get her cat released. Yikes. The one person I do know with pet insurance says that it saves her about 75% of her vet bill, but she’s a grown ass woman with a house. It’s okay if you don’t have vet insurance, there are still things you can do to improve your cat’s quality of life for reasonably cheap (See Appendix B).

3. Flea medication. Flea medication can be expensive, especially if you have two cats. Unfortunately, Advantage is the only medication that I have found effective. I’ve tried several different knock off brands, and while they worked, they didn’t last nearly as long as Advantage. I don’t worry about fleas that much in the winter, but I put it on my cats during the summer because there are lots of stray cats where I live.

4. Vomit. An occasional puke pile is nothing to be concerned about. There are lots of reasons why cats throw up, but 99% of them are digestion related. The worst part of puke is having to clean it up. As disgusting as it may be, the best way to clean up puke is to allow it to dry and to then clean it (see Appendix A). Lots of cats have food allergies (Mason, for example), so if your cat is throwing up multiple times in a week, change their diet (see Phase 5: Cat food).  If your cat throws up blood, take them to the vet immediately. 

5. Feline Respiratory Virus. Cats do not get colds like humans do, so be very wary if your cat has a runny nose, watery eye discharge, is sneezing or acting lethargic. These infections can kill cats if left untreated. If your cat is showing these symptoms, take them to the vet immediately. The vet will prescribe antibiotics that you will have to give your cat, and your cat should be feeling better within 24 hours. Once a cat gets an FRV, they are more susceptible to it. Cats can infect other cats, so keep your cats separated and give them separate food and water until your infected cat is visibly better. 

6. Bloody poop. Bloody poop (while disgusting) does not always signify illness. Sometimes it means that your cat is having trouble digesting, but other times it means that your cat has worms. Keep an eye on your cat’s poop, and if it’s still bloody after two additional days, take them to the vet and bring a sample of the poop with you. This stool sample will be tested by your vet, and if you don’t have one they will send you home and wait for you acquire one before testing anything.

7. Lumps. My cat Gretel currently has a lump on her face. I noticed it a couple months ago and took her to the vet. If your cat gets a lump suddenly, see if you can move the lump around with your fingers. If the lump feels solid and causes your cat pain, make an appointment ASAP. Gretel’s lump moves around freely and doesn’t cause her pain at all, so my vet told me not to worry about it. Cats grow non-cancerous tumors on their faces and bodies, as well as excesses of fatty tissue that cause bumps. Feeling a bump does not guarantee that your cat’s life is in danger.

8. Bottom line. Wondering if something is wrong with your cat? Ask yourself this simple question- Is your cat eating and drinking water? If your cat is not eating or drinking water, then something is wrong. Make an appointment and take them to the vet.

Phase 5: Cat Food

Spend some time researching different brands before deciding what to feed your cat. Here are some guidelines to help you.

1. Wet food vs. Dry food. It’s a scientifically acknowledged fact that wet food is much better for your cats than dry food. Unfortunately canned food can be up to three times as expensive per pound as dry food, and I can’t afford that on my budget. If you feed dry food, make sure that your cat is properly hydrated and drinking lots of water after they eat.

2. Junk food vs. Health food. Some cats are finicky eaters, mine are not. They do not care what type of food it is, they’re just happy to eat it. Meow Mix is super inexpensive and filling for cats, but it’s not healthy. It’s essentially like eating McDonalds every day. As a young adult, you probably can’t afford to spend large quantities of money on cat food. So compromise. Buy a bag of high quality “healthy” cat food, and a bag of cheap cat food, and give your cats a mixture of this.

3. Grain intolerance. Allergies are a real thing with cats. If your cat is having a hard time keeping food down, switch them to a grain free diet. I buy Rachel Ray cat food off of Amazon because Mason has a delicate stomach.

4. Proteins. Switch up the proteins in the food you’re feeding your cats. Spend a few months with salmon, then switch to chicken, then back to salmon, etc. I don’t remember why, but studies were done and this proved to be more healthy for cats.

5. How much food? Current studies say that cats should be feed about a half a cup of cat food per day. PER DAY. Cats also should have definitive feeding times, and should not be allowed to “graze” or eat all day. I feed my cats a cup of food in the morning (2 cats, half a cup each) and that’s all they get. One of the most common problems that cat owners have is over-feeding. 

6. Fast eaters. Mason has this problem where he gobbles down food super fast (he doesn’t even chew it half the time) and then throws up a few minutes later. You can buy special plates online that force cats to eat slowly like this one

7. What not to feed them. Check out this link. Also if your cat accidentally drinks antifreeze give them alcohol

8. Changing food. Remember that you can’t just feed your cat one food one day and a different food the next day. If you do, they’ll throw up. If you need to switch your cat’s food, do it gradually. Here’s how:

  • First day of switch: 95% old food, 5% new food
  • Second day: 75% old food, 25% new food
  • Third day: 75% old food, 25% new food
  • Fourth day: 50% of both foods
  • Fifth day: 50% of both foods
  • Sixth day: 25% old food, 75% new food
  • Seventh day: 25% old food, 75% new food
  • Eighth day: 5% old food, 95% new food
  • Ninth day: 5% old food, 95% new food 
  • 10th day: 100% new food!

Phase 6: Miscellaneous 

1. Cat types. I’m a big believer in the ASPCA feline-alities. ASPCA employees essentially give cats a personality test to see how they perform under stress. They have something wonderful to say about even the shyest of cats, it really puts everything in perspective. Check it out here. Points if you can guess my cat’s personality types based off what I’ve written here.

2. Bathing. Generally speaking, cats and water do not mix. I don’t bathe my cats because they don’t really get gross enough to require bathing. The one time I did try to bathe Gretel was an absolute disaster, so barring her overcoming her fear of water, I’m never going to do it again. She’s old and sleeps next to my head every night, so sometimes I have to help her clean up a bit. If your cat steps in poop or dirt or whatever, use baby wipes. 

3. “My Cat Doesn’t Like to Play”. Bullshit. All cats like to play, you just haven’t found the right toy. Mason responds to strings that are waved in circles above his head, squeaky toys, and things that are thrown so that he can run and “catch” his prey. Gretel likes crinkly things like candy wrappers, and will only chase a string if it’s dragged on the ground. Mess around and figure out what makes your cat tick. After playing your cat will:

  • Have a snack
  • Clean themselves
  • Take a nap

4. Reprimanding cats. I found a great post on Tumblr a year ago explaining this phenomenon, but I currently can’t find it, so I’m going to paraphrase. Essentially, cats don’t have great short-term memory, so you have to be careful when yelling at them. If your cat pees on your couch, and you don’t discover it until three hours later, yelling at your cat will accomplish absolutely nothing. They won’t understand why you’re upset, and they won’t understand what they did was wrong. You have to reprimand your cat’s either while they’re in the act of being naughty (i.e, peeing on the couch) or directly afterwards. 


Appendix A. Cleaners

  • Carpet cleaner (I recommend Resolve)
  • Hardwood floor cleaner (I recommend Bona)
  • Plastic gloves (I recommend whatever is cheapest)
  • Bleach (or a tile cleaner you feel more comfortable with)

 Appendix B. Caring for your cat.

  • Feliway
  • Cat lax (for those with hairballs)
  • Flea medication (you can buy Advantage in bulk on Amazon)
  • Brush (brushing decreases the risk of hairballs, fleas, and your clothes looking like shit. It can also be a way to bond with your cat)
  • Toys (get an assortment like this one)
  • Supplements (if you have an old cat, check out elder cat supplements on Amazon)
  • Ear cleansers like Epiklean (Did you know that you’re supposed to clean your cat’s ears every month? I didn’t! Gretel had an ear infection because her ears hadn’t been cleaned in 15 years)
  • Baby wipes (Gretel is very old, and sometimes she has a poopy butt. I recommend baby wipes for elder cats)
  • Multi-purpose treats (buy treats that are beneficial for your cat’s health, like treats with calcium or treats that help with hairballs)

Appendix C. Cat behavior.

Appendix D. Mason and Gretel

We’re taking questions about social media & mental health

As researchers and advocacy groups examine the impact of social media usage on mental health, they are discovering both positives and negatives. While social media fosters community and allows people to connect in ways that are possible only because of the Internet, social media can also come with risks– bullying, harassment, and language of hate. This Tumblr Issue Time discussion brings together panelists from media, advocacy, and healthcare to discuss the relationship between social media and mental health, explore the positive effects it has on community, and examine solutions for how you might mitigate or address some of the negative risks. 

Our panelists will answer your questions in an Issue Time right here on @postitforward on Tuesday, May 30th. Ask anything you’d like. 

The Ask box is open now!

You can read more about our panelists after the jump,

Keep reading

Pyramid Scheme

Our party just made level 3, and Cragak, our ranger, has convinced Davor, our barbarian, to join in with him on a business venture. So the barbarian takes a point in Profession as Multi-Level Marketing CEO of “Cragak’s Hides and Skins.”

We stop at a nearby town for a few days, so Davor sets up shop and attempts to draw in some business. He rolls a 2 for the first day.
GM: An elderly, crazed-looking dwarf approaches you. “Hey… do you have any elf skins?”
Davor: “Um… no, but we could find one for you! Would you like to put down a deposit as investment?”
GM (as dwarf customer): “Sorry, my wallet’s in my other pants…” (He’s not wearing any pants)

The next day, Davor tries again. Another 2.
GM: The same dwarf comes back again.
Davor: “Hey!… Did you, by chance, happen to bring your other pair of pants?”
GM (as dwarf): “Sorry… but do you take lizard guts?”
Davor: “Ah… no.”

The dwarf proceeds to follow Davor around for the rest of the day, staring uncomfortably at him.

On our last day in town, our barbarian tries again. Nat 20.
GM: The dwarf returns AGAIN, but this time he’s brought ten people with him! Apparently he wouldn’t stop pestering them until they came by the booth. Each person gives you 5 gold.
Davor (addressing the crowd): “Thank you! We’ll bring you product after our next hunting session. In the meantime, spread the word about Cragak’s Hides and Skins! I admire your loyalty, and we will hold an all-staff meeting the next time we’re in town where YOU WILL BE ENERGIZED and you will be ready to GO OUT and make TONS OF MONEY! Trust the process! INVEST IN THE DREAM! I love you all!”

VERNER PANTON, Canteen in the Spiegel Publishing House, Hamburg Germany, 1969

There’s being a good big brother and then there’s being a belligerent little shit, Brax

For @ doctress , who suggested:   ‘Braxiatel and the Doctor of your choice playing chess? Or maybe the Doctor and Brax stealing each other’s hats!’

I was rewatching Stakeout (as one does) and wrote down all the items from the No-no list(all I could read anyway).


No butter-syrup
No talking about Die Hard and 2 and 3 or 4 or 5
No eating mayonnaise from the jar
No peanut anything from the jar

Keep reading

Everyone Is an Idiot But Sansa & Cersei

Well this episode proves one thing: everyone is stupid except for Sansa and Cersei.

Kings Landing stupidity: The good, I read once that Jerome Flynn and Lena Headey cannot stand each other so they can’t be on the set at the same time and sure enough they got rid of Bronn before Cersei showed up. That’s about it because that whole segment was over long and quite silly and Jon shows again he’s the stupid Stark. But it did give us the wonderful Tyrion and Cersei scene. To me it looks like Peter Dinklage has just been going through the motions the past two seasons but he sure perked up in that scene. Actually they all should be thanking Lena Headey because she carried those scenes. Quite honestly, a lot of them looked out of their depth. And Dany looked less like a queen than some school girl when facing Cersei. Dany is too one trick pony, trying to intimidate with her dragons, but we find out Cersei is already six steps ahead of her.

Really, everyone was playing tic tag toe while Cersei was playing Star Trek multi-level chess and they didn’t realize it.

You know who would? Sansa. And she warned Jon about that in the beginning of the season, but true to his thick nature, he didn’t listen. Truly, the ultimate showdown needs tone between Sansa and Cersei because everyone else is far too stupid for words.

And for those who thought the wight hunt was smart? THEY GAVE THE NIGHT KING AN ICE DRAGON AND THEY DIDNT EVRN MANAGE TO CONVINCE CERSEI. Dumbasses.

Winterfell, well, we know who the true Starks are and that Sansa is the smart one, but honestly for one of the cleverest men ever THAT was his plan and his exit. Just Sansa reciting his list of crimes? I hate LF, but he deserved a better send off.

However, I do like the strength shown by the sisters and we know Jon gave away the North. There’s no sugar coating that. I think the Incest Idiots will be in for a chilly reception in the North.

Oh, one thing that was interesting in the Cersei/Tyrion scenes when she asked how Daenerys is better than other rulers since she too threatens destruction if she doesn’t get her way, Tyrion gave the weak answer of, “Because she has good advisors, me.” Not because she has a good heart or good instincts, but because, I can keep her in check. Not a ringing endorsement.

Incest Idiots, I was a little surprised how tepid the scene was. Let’s face it, the Grey Worm/ Missendei scene had more heart and tenderness to it. No loving undressing of each other, no blissful climax, not even lovely lighting. Not what you expect of a great romance.

Last thing, I am not a Theon fan, but that beach scene? Incredible job by Alfie and the other actor.

Let’s face it, the Lannisters, the Starks and Theon brought it in the episode, but the rest, meh.

Though I cracked up watching the Night King riding the dragon because he got to do that before ol’ Aegon.

Ultimately I’m okay with the Incest Idiots, because my favorite, Sansa, kicking ass and ruling like a true Queen.

Taking A Question: Lvl 300+ Characters?!?

Anonymous Asks:

“What is the Highest Level you can officially achieve in 5e?”

Well Anonymous, you won’t believe it, but it’s pretty high!

And fair warning to all, this involves math, counting, unearthed arcana and stuff!

Now, in the DMG (Dungeon Master’s Guide), Page 227 it specifically says:

“As much as adventurers desire treasure, they often appreciate other forms of reward. This section presents a variety of ways that gods, monarchs, and other beings of power might recognize the characters’ accomplishments, including supernatural gifts that give characters new capabilities; titles, lands, and other marks of prestige; and boons that are available only to adventurers who have reached 20th level.”

So, taking that into account, HERE WE GO!

First, Multi-Classing into all 12 Core Classes in the Player’s Handbook and leveling in every class to level 20 means a Level 240 Character…!

And also Multi-Classing into both the Artificer and Mystic from Unearthed Arcana, and also reaching level 20, means a Level 280 Character.

That’s already VERY High Level, BUT WE CAN GO HIGHER!!!

And by gaining every Feat in the Books, and Every Racial Feat and Skill Feat from Unearthed Arcana, takes this Character to Level 343.

And using the Dungeon Master’s Guide, WE CAN GO EVEN HIGHER!!!!

By selecting all the DMG Blessings and Charms, That’s now a Level 357 Character.

And finally, by selecting EVERY SINGLE EPIC BOON in the DMG…


LEVEL 383!

So, theoretically, that single Character is equal to 19 Characters, all of them Level 20.


So for those that would like it, we can break it down:

Highest Level with no Multi-Classing (With UA Content): 123

Highest Level with no Multi-Classing (Without UA Content): 102

Highest Level with Multi-Classing (Without UA Content): 322

Highest Level with Multi-Classing (With UA Content & Homebrews): ????

And so that’s all you need on Levels, Multi-Classing, and Maxing-Out on D&D.

And I’m sure that with all the Homebrews that exist, you could certainly reach a Level 500 or even a Level 1,000 Character!

But thanks for reading, and I hope you all liked the Math!

And remember…


P.S. If anyone out there can actually calculate the Highest Level Possible, with all the Unearthed Arcana, Official Content and Homebrews, I’d LOVE to see it!

Asperger Syndrome + MBTI

I often receive questions about typing someone or self-typing with Asperger Syndrome, so I decided to write a post addressing some things to keep in mind when dealing with this syndrome

Disclaimer: Though I did grow up with someone who has Asperger’s, I am not an expert, nor have I studied it extensively; I suggest you familiarize yourself with all the traits, tendencies, and behavioral and psychological elements, in order to go beyond this preliminary assessment

I believe it is possible to type someone with Asperger’s. But, the traits OF Asperger’s can obscure, mess with, or enhance elements of cognition; so you MUST learn to distinguish between what is a natural cognitive function process, and what is a process of the syndrome itself.

For example, here are a few Asperger’s traits, and the cognitive functions you COULD mistake it for:

  • Unable to read non-verbal signals like facial expressions (poor Fe/Se)
  • Poor judgment of the reaction of those listening to them (poor Fe)
  • Extremely literal and precise (strong Ti / thinker)
  • Confused by exaggeration or metaphors (sensor)
  • Struggles to think in abstract ways or understand abstraction (sensor)
  • Obsessive interests or hobbies / facts memorization (Te/Si)
  • Extreme reliance on routine as a “safe” (Si)
  • Hatred of unexpected change or interrupted behavior patterns (Si)
  • Poor concentration and easy distraction (Se/Ne)
  • Strong black and white moral opinions (Fi)

Now, imagine an ENFP with Asperger’s: a naturally abstract thinker who struggles to understand metaphors or non-literal things, but who exhibits all the other tendencies and traits of Ne (openness to new ideas, excitement about sharing new ideas and discussing them with others, broad, multi-level thinking, big picture focus, naïve idealism, and optimism); who wants to connect to others (but has poor ability to read them, or read between the lines), whose moral views may be more rigid than is normal for a Ne-dom; who believes in hard work (Te) and does not over-analyze rather than act; and who hates change, but is poor at detail retention, at providing specific examples, etc.

What you wind up with is… an ENFP… with stronger Si/Te-esque habits, but they are still an ENFP.

So, remember that when typing.

Focus on how the person thinks, and communicates, where their emphasis lies, what they struggle to articulate, and what is easy for them to say.

I seriously mistyped the main Asperger’s person in my life (I’ve known two), because I did not understand cognition or how to spot it, I failed to take into account the elements of his syndrome which might reinforce unnatural behaviors for his type, and took the “lazy” route of assuming those habits made him an STJ.

He isn’t.

He’s an ENTP.

His openness and excitement over new ideas, his need to discuss those ideas, and his desire to see humanity transform within a short amount of time speak to strong Ne-idealism / tendencies, but he could not understand or use idioms or metaphors as a child; as an adult, he finds totally abstract things difficult to comprehend, and asks others to interpret them in less symbolic language.

His intense need to categorize information, to nitpick, to ensure it is CORRECT (Ti) does battle with his “black and white” moral views (fake Fi; in reality, Asperger’s + Enneagram 1), leading to an intense internal duality that can be confusing for him, and other people. He manifests the usual tert-Fe desire to be liked / thought of as intelligent / receive affirmation / build a sense of community / see the world in terms of “us,” but struggles to understand his own emotions and tries to rationalize or “analyze” them instead of expressing them.

His sensory awareness is extremely poor, his hatred of change / unexpected profound, but his inferior Si manifests as inferior Si does – in freaking out if his internal sensory balance is off or he doesn’t feel well; every minor pain is a big deal. He suffers from intense sensory over-stimulation (loud noises, sounds, strong tastes; he avoids condiments on many of his foods) and hates crowds for this purpose; yet as a social extrovert, gets “wound up” around people.

Being a naturally abstract thinker (Ne + Ti) who struggles to understand abstract thinking is incredibly difficult for him. Ti finds it hard to articulate what is precise logic within the mind, and often derails; his Ne does the same, and takes him so far off topic, people often wondered how he got from A to Q. He is the literal embodiment of abstract thinking, yet cannot understand high abstraction. One might mistype him a sensor because of this, unless one listened to him talk and realized his conversation is often composed of ideas, vague generalities, and concepts, without specific examples.

So, when typing someone with this syndrome, don’t look at the symptoms for indication of cognitive process, but instead look how they might IMPACT a natural cognitive process, like a filter on a video camera. It will color the cognition but the original cognition is still present.

I haven’t met Asperger’s people of all types yet, but I speculate:

High Se-users… will be focused on the here and now, notice things in detail, tend to dominate the “space,” and want to engage their hands and bodies in the process of learning. (But with a preference for routine and obliviousness to facial patterns and expressions to tell how someone is feeling / their boredom.)

High Si-users… will have precise memories and emphasis on detail; they will prefer a certain method of thinking, place a great deal of trust in their sensory perceptions, and use comparison (have I seen / done / tasted this before?) when making decisions. (Without the awareness of idioms and metaphors that Si’s rapidly learn as part of social dialogue.)

High Ne-users… will want to share, trade, and discuss ideas. They will have idealistic and sometimes unrealistic views of how rapidly society can change, and desire to see it improve for the better. (But want routine, and struggle to understand other people’s abstract, vague, or generalized statements.)

High Ni-users… will have highly personalized, abstracted, symbolic thinking and specific visions or ideas about the future; they desire to come to a single conclusion and work toward making that vision a reality. (And struggle to “get” outside vague, abstract, or generalized statements, and prefer routine.)

High Te-users… will employ blunt logic, with the purpose of accomplishing tasks, reaching goals, organizing others, and effecting change in the world. They will still rely on facts and prioritize end-results thinking. (But may be easily distracted or find it hard to concentrate.)

High Ti-users… will want to systemize and categorize everything; will correct bad logic in others, and aim for precision; will be annoyed at “mental laziness,” and may develop an intense understanding of impersonal systems (science, technology, medicine, etc). (But will struggle with outside abstraction.)

High Fe-users… will express their emotions readily, get their feelings hurt, and seek to bond or establish togetherness with others; they want to feel useful, connected, and contribute to society (despite poor social skills / awareness, and being unable to tell how someone feels about them / the conversation).

High Fi-users… will have strong internal ethics and struggle to articulate their emotions, instead choosing to SHOW people love instead of tell them (but can struggle, especially, with “putting oneself” in someone else’s shoes, and imagining “how I might feel” without external assistance, due to their literal-ism).

- ENFP Mod