things i love about sam winchester
  • his hair 
  • long long legs 
  • what color are his eyes??? i don’t know 
  • adorable smile
  • HUGE nerd 
  • went to college
  • loves his big brother more than anyone else in the world 
  • rlly awkward 
  • loves dogs too much
  • not afraid to cry 
  • pretends to be annoyed @ dean’s jokes but is secretly amused 
  • is a big sweetheart but can also be scary af
  • puppy dog eyes
  • gives the best hugs
  • master of the bitch face
  • his entire body (i’m sorry)
  • so selfless?? almost too much
  • dimples 
  • willingly sacrificed himself to save the world 
  • would do it again if he had to 
  • is still kind and compassionate despite everything he’s been through 

[things i love about dean]

anonymous asked:

Can you please do how Yugyeom would be in bed? I love your blog so much btw! It's one of my favorites for reactions!

ahh thank you so much! 

[ Jackson ] [ Junior ] [ Mark ] [ Jaebum

  • public teasing would be a big thing with him
  • like, his hand is going to be on your thigh and sliding closer to your crotch while the two of you are trying to have a nice dinner with the other members
  • “don’t make too much noise babe”
  • him smirking at you a lot when you have sex
  • like when he finally gets you to leave the restaurant with him, he’s smirking already
  • when he’s having sex with you in your car, he’s smirking as he leaves hickeys across your neck
  • hickeys on your neck and shoulders, basically any place that’s visible on you
  • but he’s not big on receiving them because he knows the boys will tease him about them
  • rough sex with him always being the dom
  • pet names based on your preference
  • bondage kink
  • he’d love having you be absolutely submissive
  • a lot of foreplay
  • he knows how to work his fingers and his tongue jfc
  • he’d love receiving blowjobs
  • he’d lean his head back and moan and run his hand through your hair
  • him being really shy when he first sees you naked and he blushes a lot but he’s biting his lip and looking you up and down
  • “how are you so perfect baby?”
  • wall sex
  • shower sex
  • bathtub sex
  • he would like wall sex because he’d love to hold you up and have you grip his shoulders
  • shower sex because he loves the environment and he is even more in control
  • bathtub sex after he’s had a long day or he really wants to please you
  • soft sex if you ever asked for it with small kisses on your forehead and shoulders as he finds a steady rhythm
  • him gripping the headboard and accidentally crushing his fingers between it and the wall because he was rocking the bed too much
  • not a lot of talking during sex, more moaning than anything
  • post-sex cuddles with Yugyeom holding you close to him and kissing your head and whispering that he loves you
  • sex with Yugyeom would be about pleasing both of you but he’d make sure you consented to everything and while he’s still relatively young he would want to show that he’s capable of pleasuring you

anonymous asked:

Could you write about Mccree's, Genji's, and 76's reaction to being told about this mercenary who has like, tons of recognition from their kills and stuff they've done. And getting the news that they'll join overwatch. But upon meeting them, realizing they're just a huge goof and ball of happiness? Thanks!


  • He had heard about you
    • From circles
    • A ruthless killer
  • So he was tense as you came into the base
    • Until you smiled at him
    • Dancing side to side with happiness
    • Greeting him with a cheery voice
  • He is a bit suspicious of you
    • Thinking it’s a ruse
    • Until you kept doing it
    • And he had to acknowledge that was just how you were


  • He tried to keep an open mind
    • Knowing that appearances might be deceiving
    • But how else would you interpret such a ruthless killer
    • Going out of your way to ensure the target died
  • And then he was guilty when he actually met you
    • An actual vision of happiness
    • Smiling and enthusiastically greeting his master
    • Interested and polite to the omnic
  • He would go apologize to you
    • He shouldn’t have assumed that
    • And you just wave it off
    • A lot of people do

Soldier 76

  • He didn’t think about it much
    • Not really caring about it
    • They could use someone like you
    • But he wasn’t sure if he’d ever talk to you
  • Then you went out of your way to say hi to him
    • Bubbly look on your face
    • Smiling as you introduce yourself
    • He just introducing himself in return awkwardly
  • He is so taken back by you
    • You once made sure that he had a bottle of water
    • Reminding him that proper hydration is proper
    • Grasping the bottle as you leave

anonymous asked:

Edward Nygma with 10, 47, 130

Characters: Reader x Edward Nygma (The Riddler)

Warnings: none I think

Prompts: 10: “If you use up all the hot water again, I swear to god! You’re on the couch for a month!” 47: “I thought it was a one-night-stand… and now we’re married…” 130: “You fell asleep in the tub?!”

Word Count: 381

A/N: YAY ONE OF MY GOTHAM FAVES and I love all these new prompts thank u so much


Edward leaned into the tub and turned on the tap, looking forward to just taking a nice hot shower before going to bed. He turned around and looked at himself in the mirror, removing his glasses and putting them on the countertop. He began unbuttoning his shirt as he walked back towards the tub, and he stuck his hand out to feel the water. He yanked his hand back the second the icy cold water hit his skin, and he frowned.

“y/n!” he yelled, and you jumped in fright and turned around. You were in the kitchen, making some tea for you and Edward. 

“What’s wrong, Ed?” you asked, walking towards the bathroom and peeking your head around the door. He stood in front of you with his arms folded across his chest, his hair ruffled and shirt half unbuttoned. You couldn’t help but smile, despite how grumpy he was, at how cute he looked. 

“Did you use all the hot water?” he asked, and your smile faltered. You stood up straighter, running your hands through your hair.

“Well, I… um… may have taken a bath before you got home.” you stammered, and Edward sighed. “And I fell asleep-”

“You fell asleep in the tub?!” Edward exclaimed, and you ignored him and continued talking.

“When I woke up the water was all cold, so I ran some more hot water in the tub to warm it up again…” you trailed off as Edward angrily sighed.

“If you use up all the hot water again, I swear to god! You’re on the couch for a month!” he pointed at you, and you laughed. “I’m not kidding, y/n.” 

“I know, I know.” you were still smiling as you walked towards Edward and wrapped your arms around his waist. His anger faded as he wrapped his arms around you. “I’m sorry.”

You stood on your tiptoes to give him a kiss, and you felt Edward slowly smile against your lips.

“How am I so lucky to have you?” he asked, and you shrugged.

“I thought it was a one-night-stand… and now we’re married…” you laughed, and Edward beamed.

“I am very glad I married you, y/n.” he leaned over to kiss your forehead, and you giggled.

“So am I.”

rad-lionz  asked:

Bab,,, I'm literally so sorry that this is my second request kmn. But can we get comedian! Mc??? Literally so funny she makes a whole room laugh unintentionally. //You may or may have not developed into a tiny itty bitty slightly gay squish of mine oOPS >///< //

if i could pull up Seven’s ‘?!’ emoji right now I would, please don’t be sorry for requesting!! if you ever have one, throw it in my inbox, i’ll answer it gladly! no really my ass was about to turn off my laptop but i saw this and stopped myself

and ahhh omg ^//^ look here, i love you, okay??❤ im serious. my aro ass loves you ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ) 


  • depression who??? as soon as mc came to his apartment and they talked for a bit, he was laughing 
  • how did she do that? how was she so funny?
  • who cares? zen hadn’t laughed his much in a long time
  • which is great, because mc loves his laugh
  • they’re a really smiley couple because of this
  • when she becomes his manager, she makes all his cast mates laugh too
  • but don’t worry, zen always has an arm around her or something 
  • all his castmates all the time know they’re together
  • he uploads funny videos of the both of them to his fanpage 
  • sometimes when mc doesn’t mean to make him laugh and he does, she gets a bit upset
  • but he apologizes and takes her seriously 
  • “sorry babe, you described that hilariously. but i get it, that was sad”
  • he gets better at controlling his laughter at those times


  • she spreads smiles!! and laughs!!!
  • he thinks she is so funny and in such a creative way
  • mc comes up with his comebacks and dialogue while he plays LOLOL
  • and at the hospital, too! she helps lessen the worry of pet owners
  • thinks her skills are like magic like how does she always know just what to say?
  • he also sometimes mistakes her seriousness
  • also apologizes, but he looks out for it even more
  • yoosung is never sad now
  • he’s also one of those cry when laughing type people so he cries a lot
  • seven has to make him a new emoji
  • literally 97% of the time, these two are all smiles 


  • jaehee hasn’t laughed this much in practically forever
  • mc is so glad she can make her laugh and does so as much as she can
  • sometimes jaehee doesn’t even know how she does it
  • even when she’s tired af, mc still makes her smile and laugh
  • and she is so grateful
  • is much better than zen and yoosung at knowing when she’s not trying to be funny
  • understands and doesn’t laugh
  • also everyone in the cafe loves mc!
  • that person grumpy cause their late for work?
  • not grumpy anymore, have a good day pal
  • jaehee thinks that’s also magical
  • her favorite thing is when mc is in her arms and she makes her laugh so jaehee squeezes her tighter
  • its so cute and gay oh m y god


  • he laughed over the phone once
  • and mc decided she needed to make him laugh more often
  • bet your ass she does
  • the first time she makes him laugh again is also on the phone, when he was in the office
  • everyone heard and was Shocked
  • jaehee was so surprised, she told the chat room
  • the other three didn’t believe her 
  • mc did, however, and told them all to wait
  • when he got back home, she made him laugh again and got it on video
  • posted it to the messenger
  • the rfa is Shocked…except V, he made jumin laugh once too
  • but mc can do it so easily??
  • is an expert on knowing when mc isn’t being funny no worries
  • he smiles more often, god bless

707 / luciel / saeyoung

  • oh man oh man oh man
  • saeyoung had never smiled so much
  • not only did she get his jokes, but her jokes were hilarious
  • he thought he had competition at first
  • but now he’s just so happy
  • even when he gets a little depressive episode, she gets him smiling quickly
  • he knows when its time to get serious, but he still slips up sometimes
  • they are the Jokester Couple
  • except mc can also make the rest of the rfa laugh
  • saeyoung only admits defeat when she gets vanderwood to laugh too
  • he’s never been able to do that 
  • but man, mc is just so happy and makes others happy, he’s smitten

v / jihyun

  • i don’t think i’ve ever heard him laugh, i need to
  • that was probably mc’s thought process and mine tbh
  • she succeeded at the party 
  • his laugh is adorable!! its like a loud giggle
  • the rest of the rfa are staring with wide eyes
  • they haven’t heard him laugh since rika 
  • and when they all meet up again later, he smiles much more 
  • and more genuinely too
  • he laughs more! V is being bright again and everyone is so thankful to mc
  • has the best intuition of mc’s seriousness of all of them 
  • the sun has never been brighter than when he laughs


  • it took a while
  • but mc wasn’t really trying at first
  • she started by trying to get a smile
  • and when she learned how to do that quickly, getting him to laugh was easy
  • saeyoung is so surprised but so happy
  • his brother is laughing and happy
  • saeran literally doesn’t laugh at much, we’re lucky if a tv show makes him laugh
  • but he laughs so easily with mc
  • it’s cause he’s comfortable with her
  • absolutely knows when it’s not time for jokes
  • but being around her just makes him smile now 
  • he feels warm inside, this is new..but he likes it
  • it feels…healing
This would be a slam poem if I was brave enough to read it
But I haven’t been brave enough for anything in a long time
Not brave enough to talk since the world told me I talked too much
Not brave enough to sing since the world said I couldn’t
Not brave enough to dance since the world laughed at my happiness
Not brave enough to read since the world labelled me a freak for liking books
Not brave enough to write since the world burned my teenage poetry
Not brave enough to listen since the world threw my music in the trash
Not brave enough to play since the world decided I didn’t have any talent
Not brave enough to be since the world made my existence a political statement.

I haven’t been brave enough for anything since I traded my happiness for society’s standards of conformity
And society hasn’t been functioning since we all gave away our happiness
So tell me who got anything out of that deal.
—  EMJ // Brave Enough
Marriage First Headcanons

Part 2 of @rozalynfrozen’s request of headcanons of the boys if Candy said she wants to get married for their ‘first time’. Enjoy!


  • Understands her decision, but is just confused as of why? 
  • “I didn’t even know you considered that…but, alright." 
  • Quiet - I mean he psychically is ready for this but mentally? No.
  • Acts kind of petty, smh marriage is far away,,
  • Figured he wasn’t ready anyway, but still is petty
  • Consideration of marriage later on in their life
  • Kinda starts making out a little less, until Candy is ready
  • Won’t admit he’s nervous asf with the idea
  • Is tempted to research but it’s h eckin g bru tal to read
  • If that’s what makes Candy happy, so be it
  • Doesn’t think it’s bad to try new things, kinda risky


  • He’s kinda fine with it, it’s her choice man
  • "Yeah…if that’s what you want, Candy.” pretty much
  • Not really upset?? Pretty chill about it
  • Can’t see himself as a husband, yet.
  • Won’t  force Candy to do anything she doesn’t want to do.
  • doesn’t mean he won’t hecking make out with Candy
  • *Starts* asking for permission to touch Candy in certain places when they make out
  • Isn’t really confused, figured that Candy would want marriage first
  • Actually has an urge to kinda get married
  • Isn’t thinking about marriage, unless Candy thinks about it
  • Isn’t really into marriage that quick either, he’d rather go with the flow on things


  • Is surprised Candy considered marriage, because he never put thought into their first time
  • “…I didn’t even know you thought about that-" 
  • he NEVER EVER put thought into it
  • Accidentally made himself nervous if they do the thing
  • Questioning himself  when he they makeout 'does it hurt’ or 'am I hurting her?’
  • He’s okay with Candy waiting for marriage, since he kinda realized he did too
  • Refuses to look anything up about it, doesn’t want to ready anything about it.
  • His pure eyes can’t take the horror of researching,,
  • Considered marriage, he’s ready for it.
  • Just wants for Candy to be happy
  • Really doesn’t care about their first time, tbh - as long as he and Candy are together.


  • So hecking confused? He’s thought about it a few times but … not really
  • Is usually playful with her anyways, so, he’s fine with the marriage rule
  • "Hold up - You actually THOUGHT about that?”
  • Is confused for the rest of the day, just lost
  • Would ask Alexy but, at the same time …Alexy probably suggested it.
  • Has probably tried to research and regrets that decision heavily
  • Feels old if he’s gonna be called 'husband’, just so old
  • Marriage scares him.
  • He’d rather think of right now and less of the future.
  • If the time does come, he’s kinda ready for it -
  • Doesn’t mind at all, actually. 
  • Isn’t ready for that yet.


  • Blushing mess, he’s thought about it a few times but rarely
  • Wants to wait until marriage as well
  • Too shy with the idea of their first time anyways
  • “I won’t force you to do anything you don’t wanna do Candy…”
  • Seeks advice from his father, who agrees - thankfully
  • Really just a blushing mess, he can’t help but thing how hot it’d be.
  • Needs to cool down psychically and mentally.
  • Will probably be lost for the rest of the day, thinking about their wedding.
  • Is pretty stiff after that revelation, he’s been very gentle when they makeout
  • Can’t help but smile at the idea of them getting married
  • Asks Candy what time she considers marriage
  • Thinks more of the wedding tbh, forget the first time- Candy’s dress though.

anonymous asked:

Heyyyy, your writing is life. I LOVE YOUR BLOG SO MUCH! Could you please do wolfstar headcanons where Remus has...werewolfy tendencies? Does that make sense? Like he's dominant and possessive and marky. I'm not making sense.

Thank you!!! <3 And you most definitely make sense yES:

  • Remus doesn’t like people touching Sirius too much
  • Not hand shaking, or back patting, or hair ruffling- just no.
  • Remus doesn’t like it.
  • He has an especially rough time containing this fact
  • So, because of this, Quidditch after-parties (especially ones where Sirius has done rather well in the previous game) are not his thing
  • Because that’s all people jumping on Sirius and hugging him and giving him jokingly sloppy kisses on his cheek and messing up his hair and everything that Remus and Remus only should be allowed to do
  • And he tries to just sit there and ignore it. He tries to just drink his butterbeer and not watch but he can hear it
  • He can hear the “Well done, Black!” and the hand shake and the “Fuck yeah, Sirius!” And the hug
  • And he knows that when they’re in bed together later that night he’ll be able to smell all these other people all over him and he hates that
  • Because Sirius is his
  • And if he’s going to smell like anything other than himself it will be Remus
  • So his grip on his drink slowly gets tighter and his eyes get narrower and the angrier he gets the more heightened his senses become which is not helping
  • The final straw is Angie Rosebow and Caroline Courflush kissing Sirius on each cheek at the same time and no no no those cheeks are not theirs they are Remus’ they have no right he’sminehe’snottheirsstoptouchinghimstopstopstophe’sminestop
  • And the next thing he knows he’s flinging his drink down on the table and grabbing Sirius out of their clutches and pushing him behind him and fucking growling at the two giggling girls
  • They stop their giggling immediately and stare at him in shock
  • “Whoa, Moons, alright there, love?”
  • Remus whirls around and growling out a “you’re mine” through his teeth, low enough for only Sirius to hear
  • Sirius is just as shocked as the two girls behind them are but at the same time all his blood seems to be rushing downwards because Remus is flushed and he’s got a bruising grip on Sirius’ hips and he’s fucking hot and calling Sirius his and he’s so turned on right now
  • “Y-Yeah…”
  • Remus just shoots one more glance at the party and he knows he can’t stand it anymore, “C’mon.”
  • He pulls Sirius up the dorm staircase and into their dorm room. He locks the door and throws some locking and silencing charms up which instantly makes Sirius’ heart beat faster because what is about to happen
  • Before he can think much else he’s being shoved against a wall and Remus is attacking his mouth and tugging at his clothes, “need to get their fucking scents off of you…”
  • And Sirius doesn’t really know what the hell he’s on about but if it involves taking their clothes off he’s all for it.
  • Pretty soon Remus has got all Sirius’ clothes in a pile far away from their bed and he’s just attacking Sirius’ neck and shoulders and Sirius feels his teeth so many times he thinks he’s going to pass out from the sheer intensity of it all
  • “You’re mine, Sirius. Promise me.”
  • Fuck- I’m yours. I’m yours, holy shit, Moons.”
  • He thinks he might have passed out because the next thing he knows, he’s waking up with Remus curled up next to him, much more peaceful
  • He watches Remus sleep for a little bit before he decides he better get up and get ready for classes
  • He walks sleepily into the bathroom, prepared to start brushing his teeth but stops dead in front of the sink when he sees his reflection
  • His shoulders and neck- fuck, his entire torso- his hips even, are positively covered with purple and red marks, ranging from small little nips to full on and rounded bruises roughly the size of a Galleon
  • “Merlin,” Sirius stares at himself in amazement, turning and looking over his shoulder to see more - they trail down his shoulder blades to his wing bones - light, red nail marks are sunk into his skin
  • “God, Remus.” Sirius whispers to himself, “What the- Merlin.”
  • “Morning-” James stops dead in his tracks towards the sinks, his eyes fixed on Sirius. His eyes slowly get wider and wider, “For fucks sake. What did he do to you?”
  • Sirius stutters, “I-”
  • “No. No I don’t want to know-”
  • “Morning.” Comes another, softer voice from the doorway
  • James gives Sirius a little salute and quickly names his exit (”I did not need to see that.”)
  • “Remus!” Sirius gestures wildly to himself, “Wha-” He turns back towards the mirror, “For Merlin’s sake!”
  • Remus just walks up to Sirius and wraps both arms around him from behind, gazing at Sirius in the mirror intensely 
  • It’s then that Sirius notices just how good Remus smells - not like a store bought scent though… like he’s just radiating off… him. His own thick scent that can only be described as Remus and it’s like it’s surrounding them
  • “Remus-?” But the next thing Sirius knows Remus is pressing his nose deep into Sirius’ neck and inhaling.
  • Sirius feels frozen as he feels Remus’ grip tighten, his eyes flutter close for a second before they flash back open as Remus very gently bites over one of Sirius’ already sensitive marks
  • Remus straightens back up with a pleased smile on his face, pressing a kiss to one of the larger marks on Sirius’ shoulder and nodding to himself, “Much better.”


anonymous asked:

Hey friend, i know you said a while ago that you werent the person to come to asking for headcanons, but i was wondering if you have some? even if its just like "kara likes to wear socks to bed on summer", please, i got 2 of my wisdom teeth extracted at once and im a little miserable. whatever is fine. or lets talk about krypto an supercorp because gosh was that the cutest shit ever

i didn’t realize that krypto stuff was headcannons? i’m not really sure what i thought headcannons were, but it wasn’t that. but sure, i can do that again!

  • do you know how much exercise a superdog needs??
    • it’s a lot. a ton. 
    • throwing the frisbee only does so much
      • someone called it space catch. i love it and i’m stealing that, thank you
  • lena tries throwing the ball for him
    • it doesn’t go well
    • like at all
    • she throws it and- he’s just already sitting there, tail wagging with the ball in his mouth. she throws as hard as she can and for as many times as she can
      • nothing changes?? krypto gets it immediately, looking fine while lena is sweating and her arm hurts and kara, there has to be a better way
  • kara, with all her amazing ideas- no, trust me lena. it’s great- decides to test krypto
    • she flies across the city in the hugest game of hide and seek
    • lena gets dragged around the city while krypto tries to track down kara
        • she’s not sure why she agreed to this
        • yes she is. kara had smiled and said please and lena, oh she’s running out the door that very second
    • and krypto? he’s so happy when he finds kara. there’s a lot of jumping and hugging and you’re such a good boy, krypto 
  • next kara tries to hide one of krypto’s toys to find
    • when he finds it, he doesn’t appreciate kara snaching his toys
    • as a fuck you he sneaks off with kara’s shoes and lets her search through the city for it, see how she likes it
  • bath time is a mess. which is the complete opposite of what it should be??
    • but have you ever tried bathing a dog bigger than you? when both of you have superstrength??
      • minus the superstrength, i did it a lot at an animal shelter. it was awful. i was no match for the doggos
    • krypto, bless his heart, can’t sit still
      • there’s bubbles and soap to eat. kara throws in squeaky toys despite lena commenting i don’t think that’s a good idea darling
      • it’s not a good idea
  • kara and lena get thoroughly soaked
    • krypto not so much
  • not to mention, he doesn’t really like it when they have to scrub in the shampoo
    • if you stop jumping in every mud puddle you find we wouldn’t have to do this
    • so he maybe bites at kara’s shirt and pulls her in
      • it’s so ridiculous
      • kara flails and falls face first into the tub
        • lena laughs until a splash of water smacks her
    • it becomes a free for all after that
  • lena brings a lot of work home, because she still has so much to do, but it’s so much nicer working and being able to hear kara humming in the kitchen and krypto pressed against her leg
    • when kara decides lena’s done enough, she turns on the radio and holds out her hand to lena
    • lena just shakes her head, because she’s still got some more to get through so kara goes to the next best thing
    • lena can’t hold back her laughter as kara sways around the room with krypto’s paws at her hip. krypto barks along with the song, he’s got better rhythm than kara
    • eventually lena, because oh, she’s a lovesick fool and she knows it, joins in. krypto plops down in her place on the couch and lena and kara spin around the room
      • give me kara crooning sappy love songs to lena while they dance
        • i’m not sure if i’d survive that but what a way to go, am i right??
    • lena just smiling softly and setting her head on kara’s shoulder
  • they go to midvale when lena can take time off and kara’s got a few things she can work on at home
    • they just let krypto run free and he takes off across the beach, kara and lena walking hand in hand over his pawsteps in the sand
    • eliza Loves him. he’s so sweet. he’ll get up early with her and follow her around. when she sits down to drink her coffee, he’ll curl up in her lap, and it’s a little tough, but she manages just fine
    • alex and maggie come. they take krypto swimming and surfing?? krypto loves it. he sits right on the board in front of alex and it’s great
    • they make sure to get a ton of pictures
    • lena’s favorite is one eliza hands her right before they leave
      • it was one afternoon when they were sitting on the porchswing
      • kara’s feet are in the air, smile oh so tender as it’s directed down at her
      • her face is pressed against kara’s neck, but still the smile on her face is clear. hand scratching krypto’s head from his place on her lap
      • lena doesn’t have many pictures, but it doesn’t matter because that one? it’s the best
to everyone prepping for finals:

i think we all need to take a step back
just for a little bit

and i know this sounds cliche
this midterm literally does not mean much
not even in terms of your grades !!!

don’t give me that “high achiever” crap ok and dont tell me you’re going to die bc of an A- or even a B-
you’re not. seriously.
don’t even joke with me.

care for urself and don’t stress too much

it’s going to be ok
listen to some music
lay in the hot tub for an hr and get finger prunes
go to sleep early!!!!! (learned my lesson omg)

ofc we all want good grades
we all want to do well
and pushing yourself to achieve is GREAT!!
i support you 100%


u gotta understand that this literally isn’t everything!
ok now realize that colleges do NOT care about one B-.

just because you failed doesnt mean you’re a failure!
^^^^ that was the most important thing someone told me this month

take study breaks. use the pomodoro technique (30 minutes of working, 5 minute break, then 30 minutes work)!!
draw, run, take a bath, go make some tea, light a candle, take a power nap, and then get back to work.
don’t forget to take these breaks!!!!

i love u and i promise one failure won’t be the end of u. take care of yourself!

Fansign Recap

Wooooow. So I know I’m the worst! It’s only been what? 2 weeks since I returned from Korea and now…finally now I am posting this recap. Heads up before heading in, this is just going to be what I can remember clearly. I have this habit of being so filled with adrenaline in moments like these that I tend to blackout details. I tried to stay lucid for you guys I swear! So I’m sorry if you were hoping for better. This is what I’ve got.

The Letters:

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Nine ways of destroying your spoons

Step 0: Accept this title is already a lie

1. Wash your hair
Bottle lifted
Hands flexed to squeeze–
just right, not too much
not too little–
Hand cupped
Arms lifted to head
Then pressure, downwards
Moving in circles
Pounded by water
Keep going until rinsed
Repeat? No.

2. Vacuum the floor
Hips and back bent
Unwind cord
Still bent
Plug in cord.
Jostle handle downwards
Push button
SHOVE with the thigh
SHOVE with the arm
SHOVE with the hip
PULL with the hamstring
STRETCHing backwards
GRASPing the handle
THROWing all the weight.
Repeat? Apparently a lot.

3. Make your dinner
Handle clutched
Hips shifted to open
Stooped down slightly
then hand thrust forward
Weight shifting
shredding deltoids
then triceps
balance maintained
by the deathgrip on the door
Plastic container tossed
somewhere safe, countertop
Oh god, there’s still the heating
and eating, too?

4. Write email
Hard chair under butt
hard plastic wrists
Slight movements left right
up down, tap–NOT SLIDE–
on the mouse pad
Fingers creaking
stuck, unmoving
delete, backspace, undo
the right ring and left pinkie
have pushed so hard
it’s aalllll out of control
password accepted
Words now would be good.
In order would be better.

5. Grade some papers
See above, but with more
hands jerked
tips caught suspended
one hand ahead of the other
of course on a keyboard
A pencil? Do I look like
an athlete?

6. Drive to the pharmacy
Door opened
Paused before the space
hip yanked up
to fit foot in the well
and THUNK, drop all at once
into the seat.
Arms grip left leg to move it inside
Ignore the popping noise
Knuckles bent around key
wrist snaps to turn–
not too long, not too short
not like I have much control over that–
let go, and left fingers wrap
around the wheel
Right leg clenches up
held on the brake
–not too much, not too little–
burning already before
right arm twists into gear
Right leg clenched
prepared to slide over
ankle flexion burning.
And we’re out of the parking space.
Only a mile and a half to go!

7. Write some poems
notepad opened
hands tense over keyboard
oh screw it

he usually doesn’t try to explain it anymore.
dean still looks at him across the room sometimes and says
get outta your head sammy
whatcha bein’ broody about
jess used to say
why you sad baby
why don’t you talk to me baby

most people he’s met since don’t know him well enough to ask
don’t know him long enough to notice
he thinks (for no reason he can really explain)
that john maybe understood this part of him
but they never stopped fighting long enough for him to say so.
but the truth is that sam’s head is where he keeps the world
the parts of it he wants to live in
the rest he files away in neat boxes.
dean navigates the world by touching it (sam’s always known that)
a necklace that he only gave up at the very gates of hell
cold beer that soothed the heat of memory
warm skin under his hands to drag him back to the living, away from monsters in the dark
the impala and the road underneath her –
those are the lines dean draws around himself
to keep from dissolving into the void
but not sam
sam learned a long time ago that skin doesn’t protect you from all that much
not from demons and their blood
not from the benevolent interference of angels
it doesn’t protect your mind or your memory or your soul
not even from the people you love
the people who would take a bullet for you.
skin’s not good for much.
so sam measures things in an equation without skin
he keeps things in his mind
the last hill, the one he’ll go down fighting on
bloody and blind but himself
surrounded by the things (intangible but no less real) that made him
and that make him who he is
ellen’s hug
jo laughing impishly up at him
the feel of jess warm and breathing inside his arms
the way she would lean up to whisper in his ear
the day john took them to a carnival
not a very good one, just some kiddie rides and a gallery of carnie games
but dean took him on the merry-go-round
pretended it was the best fucking thing in the world
and at the time sam was five and thought that it was true
and john destroyed the shooting gallery’s top scores and won them both giant stuffed elephants
that had been a good day.
or the first time dean had let him have a beer
the first time dean had held his hair while he puked
dean holding him and holding the darkness off of him
the way bobby’s house smelled equally of toast and old books and hunter’s helper
the feeling he got when he looked at dead languages
or got around a dead end in a case
or the one that he only ever got in the dead of night
taking a leak maybe beside the impala
or stretching his legs during a long drive
under a starflung sky
the feeling of peace and cosmic quiet and the promise of home in the end.
his head is where he keeps those things
‘cause his skin and the things it touches
he doesn’t quite trust.