much bigger than i expected too

Auston Matthews - Part 22

How am I already at part 22?? 

The next week is a whirlwind of planning, packing and hidden tears. My final request to the university was to be housed someplace that allowed me to bring my two dogs, because there was no way in hell I was leaving them on top of leaving my parents. So I spent many hours on the phone and computer trying to find a place that wasn’t downtown (as much as I had loved being downtown while staying at Auston’s, there was no way I wanted that for myself every day), and that had plenty of space for my girls to run.

               Finally settling on a neighborhood that was not yet completely developed, I was able to get a good price for a house that was much bigger than I expected with two additional bedrooms besides the master. The university expected me to choose two roommates to join me there, which I had absolutely no plans to do so, and the university wasn’t too pleased about it but agreed regardless. I’m not a huge fan of being around people more than I have to be.

               Auston tried to be helpful in pointing out various things in different neighborhoods that I was looking into, but eventually he had to give Mitch my number because I was being so picky. Which resulted in a chain reaction of my number being handed out to several players on the team which then resulted in gaining several new snapchat friends. Who, because they are just so “gracious” as Mitch put it, send me snapchats night and day of Auston, “to help me cope with the separation” as Mitch also put it.

               Most all of the snaps were of Auston with either a grumpy expression on his face at being photographed or with pink cheeks which I’m sure was from one of his teammates giving him a hard time. To be completely honest, they were always the highlight of my day. In addition, I had started watching the Leafs more than I had before, which annoyed me but I couldn’t help it. I missed Auston already and seeing him on the ice was calming, and afterwards he would always find a private place to call me.

               I glance at the clock and do the quick calculation of what time it is in L.A, and almost instantly my phone vibrates on my dresser. I scramble over the many boxes in my way and snatch up the phone, seeing the new very familiar name flash across my screen.

               “Hello?” I ask a bit breathlessly for having only ran ten feet.

               “You always answer like you don’t know who’s calling,” Auston’s voice says through the speaker, a teasing tone to his words.

               “Sometimes I don’t, especially after that conversation with Mitch two days ago,” I reply, flopping down on my bed.

               “Yeah, that’s not going to happen again.” Auston huffs into the phone and I giggle.

               “You weren’t very nice to him afterwards,” I remind him, grinning at my ceiling.

               Auston makes some noise into the phone and I burst out laughing again.

               “He just wanted to make sure I knew how much you missed me,” I tease.

               “I don’t miss you,” Auston grumbled into the phone and I bite my lip to hold in another laugh. “That’s it, we need to facetime instead, it’s driving me crazy hearing you laugh and not getting to see it.”

               Before I can say anything back the phone call is ended and within seconds a facetime request comes through.

               “Hi,” I say shyly, the screen popping up with Auston’s face in clear view. He’s lying in bed as well.

               “Hi,” he says softly back and my cheeks flame. “How’s packing?” He asks the same question every night, I think he’s more eager for me to be in Toronto than I am, even though he’s currently on the other side of the country.

               “Almost done, just clothes and things I need between now and two days from now are left,” I say, panning the camera off me and showing him the stacks of boxes creating a hectic path through my room.

               “I wondered what your room would look like,” he says and I cock my head to the side.

               “Why?” I ask, bringing the camera back to me.

               “You’re just a hard person to read I guess,” Auston shrugs and looks a little embarrassed.

               “I don’t have to imagine what your bedroom back home in Arizona looks like,” I say, stretching back across my bed.

               “No?” He asks, a slight smile tugging at his lips.

               “Nope, I even slept in your bed once,” I nod.

               “You what?”

               I have his full attention now.

               “You heard me. Alex had the flu and Breyana already had a friend sleeping in her room with her, so Mrs. Matthews set me up in your room. It was when I was in my sleeping naked phase,” I muse, hiding my grin by pressing my lips together.

               Auston goes still on the other end of the call, and then brings a hand to his face, rubbing it and I bite my tongue to hold back a laugh.

               “Why do you have to do that to me,” he groans and I can’t hold it back anymore, I giggle and roll onto my side. He watches me with an amused expression on his face that makes my cheeks blush again. “There’s my favorite blush,” he murmurs and I look away from the camera shyly.

               “I wasn’t actually naked, just to clarify,” I say after a moment, peeking back at him.

               “I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that, I liked my vision better,” he says.

               I roll my eyes and sit back up on my bed.

               “Where’s Connor?” I ask, not hearing him in the background.

               “Dinner with some guys,” Auston answers and glances at the clock on his nightstand it looks like. “I’ll have to go soon to meet with Mitch and a few others.”

               “Well then I’ll give you a really fast tour,” I say and slide out of bed. I hold the phone up a bit higher and I point to various things. “That’s my bed,” I say obviously, gesturing behind me, Auston rolls his eyes at me. “Where all the magic happens, obviously. Cause I…” I climb my way over to where my T.V is mounted and pick up my stack of Harry Potter movies. “Watch these all the time on it.” I laugh at my own joke while Auston just scoffs at me.

               “Good one,” he says but I can see him holding back a smile.

               I purse my lips thinking about what the show him next. My eyes travel to my ceiling again and I bound back to my bed, stepping up onto it and stretching up to move one of my ceiling tiles.

               “When I was little I would climb up onto a ladder and write down the name of the boy I currently had a crush on up here on the wall,” I tell Auston, finally getting the tile to shift over so I could see the messy sprawl of my adolescent handwriting on the small foot of space under the vent work. I flip the camera and point out a few of the names.

               “Owen, he was the first boy I had a crush on. In kindergarten he used to pull my hair and I punched him the nose, he didn’t like me as much after that. Logan, he was my first kiss when I was in eighth grade,” I smile at the faint memory of him having to stand on the sidewalk curb so that he was taller than me in order to kiss me.

               “Eighth grade?” I hear Auston say and I flip the camera back to me.

               “Yeah, does that surprise you?” I ask him.

               “Well kinda, you seem like a confident person. I would imagine you had boys trailing after you since you could walk,” Auston says, raising his eyebrows at me.

               I laugh as I answer him. “I don’t think of myself as confident, I’m comfortable with myself, there’s a difference. But when I was younger I was terrified of kissing, I only kissed him and one other boy before I graduated high school, I didn’t like it then like I do now.”

               “Why didn’t you like it?” Auston asks.

               “I guess because it just seemed like a very intimate thing. Even now I think of it that way sometimes, altogether I’ve kissed five boys, including you. Kissing means more to me than most people I think, I would never kiss someone that I didn’t care about in some way,” I trail off staring at the couple other names of insignificant boys that I had crushes on.

               “I prefer feeling over lust, I guess,” I say after a moment. I look back down at my phone and see Auston smiling at me.

               “What?” I ask self-consciously, eyeing him.

               “So you do care about me,” he smirks and I roll my eyes.

               “No, just want you for your body,” I huff at him.

               “Doesn’t surprise me,” he says and I want to reach through the phone and wipe that smirk off his face. “Though you also just admitted you want me,” he adds.

               “I thought that much was obvious when I took advantage of your emotional state on the stairs of the science building in Toronto,” I quirk an eyebrow at him and his eyes narrow. “But I’m more than willing to refrain from all future advantage taking if you want,” I tease him and I can see the blood pool in his cheeks.

               “You know I’m starting to think you’re too smart for me,” Auston starts, a smile finally quirking his lips up. “Every time I try to get under your skin it always backfires.”

               I laugh and slip back down onto my bed, sitting crisscrossed and holding the phone up.

               “You get under my skin more than you might think, Auston,” I tell him.

               “That’s good to hear because I’m a mess of jealousy over little Owen and Logan and all those other names on that damn wall.”

               “Would it make you feel better if I added your name to the wall?” I ask him jokingly, this makes him laugh and shake his head.

               “As long as my name is on that sweatshirt you’re wearing, I’m okay,” his nods at me and I realize that I’m wearing the USA hoodie he gave me back in Toronto.

               “My dad almost fell over when he saw it actually.” I laugh at the memory of five days ago when I was outside with my dogs and he saw the name across my shoulders, he almost slipped down the ice covered stairs in his stupor.

               “I always forget Mr. (Y/L/N) is your dad, I spent so much time with him when I lived in Ann Arbor, lusting over his only daughter who never paid me the slightest attention,” Auston muses and I roll my eyes.

               “Don’t you have a dinner to get to?” I ask him, though I really don’t want to hang up with him.

               “Unfortunately yes,” he says, glancing at the clock again. “Don’t want Mitch to be mad at you for holding me up.”

               The moment the words leave his lips my IPad lights up with an Imessage from my phone, unable to go through because of my current Facetime call. I pull it over to me and glance at the message. Low and behold, it’s from Mitch.

               R u on the phone with my boy? If he stands me up im gonna be pissed

               I laugh and read it out loud to Auston who rolls his eyes this time.

               Don’t make me come up and get him. I don’t wanna know what u’ve been doing on the phone but im not afraid to walk in there.

               The next message comes through and I blush, Auston asks me what he said and I reluctantly tell him. A cocky grin creeps across his face. I ignore him and type out a reply to Mitch.

               I’m hurt you think I would purposely keep your boyfriend from you for so long

               That’s it. I’m comin up.

               I giggle and tell Auston he better get going.

               “Mitch is on his way, apparently he’s a little jealous,” I wink at Auston and I hear knocking on his hotel door.

               “Well, the fun police just arrived so I better let you go,” Auston yawns and I can’t help but admire how adorable he is.

               “Alright, don’t let them ruffle your feathers too much,” I smile, still not wanting to hang up.

               Auston eyes me a moment, the knocking on his door getting louder.

               “Three days,” he says and I nod.

               “Three days,” I bite my lip and give him a shy smile before ending the call.

               I lay back in my bed, the giddy feeling in my stomach still flying around. I eye the still exposed wall behind my ceiling tile and I grab a marker from my nightstand. Getting back to me feet I stretch up as far as I can and hesitate just a second before writing out one more name on my wall. I step back to admire my work, a smile playing across my face before shifting the tile back into place and hopping back off my bed to get back to packing.

               Just as I expected, my snapchat was soon flooded with pictures from Mitch and Nylander, all pictures of either their faces or Auston’s. I had barely had a conversation with either of them but I was already attached to both of them, which was making to easier as I packed. Knowing that there were people in Toronto that I could make relationships with. I laugh softly at how just over a week ago I had been sobbing in Auston’s car to him that I had no one in Toronto, which was just the opposite.

               There’s a soft knock on my door and I look up to see my mom peeking in.

               “Hey,” I say, halting my progress of getting as many socks into the outer areas of the duffle bag in front of me.

               “Hi, sweetheart, how’s it going?” My mom asked, smiling softly at me though I can see through it. She’s just as sad for me to leave as I am.

               “It’s going,” I give her a halfhearted smile back.

               She silently moves farther into the room, moving gracefully through the mess of boxes and bags to get to my side. Grabbing the box I had just finished shoving all my shoes inside and dragging it over to sit in front of her, then taking the socks in my hand and placing them inside the shoes already packed away.

               “Oh,” I say dumbly and flash her a smile.

               “You learn after moving a few times how to save room,” she says softly, continuing the process until all my socks are out of sight. I sit silently and watch her work. When she’s done she pushes the box over to where she found it and we stare at each other.

               Tears well behind my eyes and I stumble to my feet into my mother’s waiting arms, already outstretched to me. I wrap my arms around her slender waist and burry my face into her neck, grateful that I never reached her in height. Her hands slowly stroke my hair that is so much like hers, I can feel wet tears falling into it as well. We don’t say anything for several minutes, only holding each other and quietly sobbing.

               From the time I could talk my mother had been my best friend, my constant support even when my dad went on scouting trips to Europe or Western Canada for weeks at a time. That only meant that we ordered take out and I got to sleep with her in her bed for a week straight. We became even closer when I graduated high school and was home during the day. Being an engineer, she was able to work from home most of the time, creating models and blueprints on her computer a few hours a day when I would go to class. Other than that, we were constantly together.

               The night my dad told me the story about the North Star for the first time and how when he had met my mom, the need to keep following it stopped, she was out there with us. I was seated in my dad’s lap, my head rolled back on his shoulder as I stared hard at the star, thinking there was nothing more beautiful in the world. However, when my dad spoke I looked at my mom in time to see the biggest and most beautiful smile I had ever seen on her face, and I knew in that moment that I was wrong about the star. It wasn’t the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, my mother was.

               Now standing here with both of us crying, I still think the same thing, she’s more beautiful than I could ever aspire to be. My dad always said he was thankful that I got every positive gene from my mom; her brains, compassion, sense of humor, her beauty and most of all her love. He also complained that I got all my negative genes from him; his too big of eyes, temper and stubbornness. None of which I thought were negative in any way.

               “Mom?” I ask.


               “Can you just move with me?”

               My mom’s body vibrates with laughter and she puts his hands on my shoulders, pushing me back gently and wiping at my tears with her thumbs, making me feel like when I was nine years old and fell off my bike, skinning my knee. I was trying to be tough like my dad taught me, trying to keep the tears in but I couldn’t stop them all.

               “No, honey I can’t. And even if I could, I wouldn’t because it’s your life starting.” She smiles softly at me and tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear, I always used to hate when she did that but now I wish she would do it all the time.

               I pretend sigh. “Worth a shot,” I grin at her and nuzzle against her again. My mom laughs again, wrapping her arms around my back. Her hand grazes the name written across my shoulders and I tense slightly.

               “I remember him, you know,” she traces the last name with her fingers and I open my eyes.

               “What?” I ask, pulling back to look at her.

               “When I would go with you and your father to practices or games. He was good, even better when you were there watching,” she continues on, smiling to herself, lost in some memory.

               “What are you talking about?” I frown at her.

               “One time they were playing and they were playing awful mind you, falling behind four to nothing within the first ten minutes of the first period. You came late to that game, but when you got there it was just at the halfway point in the second period and I saw the moment he spotted you in the stands. It was like someone lit a fire in his skates because he jumped over the boards and flew down the ice, stole the puck and within seconds it was in the back of the net. Everyone cheered, but you cheered the loudest. He went into show off mode then, I believe he scored once more and then had-“

               “Four assists…” I finish for her, remembering very clearly the game she was referring to. I make a face at her. “Honestly how did everyone see it but me,” I wonder out loud and she quirks an eyebrow at me.

               “Because you’re Y/N, who only had eyes for the sky. Just like her father,” my mom laughs.

               “Until he found you,” I say and she blushes, another trait that I just so happened to get from my mom.

               Her eyes dart down to my wrist, exposed because I have the sleeves of the sweatshirt pulled up to my elbows.

               “From what I can tell, you seemed to have found something as well,” she taps the golden charm in the middle of my bracelet and winks at me. I turn pink and swat her hand away.

               “I have not!”

               “Keep telling yourself that for as long as you can, honey,” my mom says, a smirk pulling at her lips as she makes her way to my door. “But I can see it in your every being.”

anonymous asked:

Guys, realistically, t100 has 0 chance to be cancelled before s5. The C/W is keeping CEG on air with 500K viewers. TO will get less viewers than t100, except if TVD viewers come in to increase the ratings. The best you can expect is them keeping up on dropping and going further down the 0.3 road. And even that, t100 has a faithful fanbase, so don't expect them to drop too much under 1M unfortunately. Now, we can all hope next season will be the last, which is probable. Time will tell.

I agree w you. They won’t backtrack but they can shorten their order or make bigger budget cuts. So don’t watch online legally, don’t use the official HT. Things can’t improve for them.

Art by @dakotaliar

Read the fic Ab Aeterno by @nevertrustastilesthing and @runicscribbles

“So you’re the fabled Fortune’s Ghost. A lot shorter than I expected.”

He tensed minutely, turning to the pirates’s former captain. Salty and unwashed, it was difficult to immediately notice how young he was. He was also exactly as tall as Scott. Thankfully Scott’s hat was bigger.

“A lot younger than I thought too.” The rival Captain might have been beaten and chained, but he still wielded his tongue like a weapon. That kind of arrogance could get a man killed. “You’ve picked up a lot of legends for a man barely out of boyhood. You must hire good storytellers to make up your lies.”

Scott smiled bitterly, tipping his feathered hat back to get a better look at the other man. “I beat you, didn’t I?”

The prisoner’s grin slipped and he glared. “A minor setback, though it depends on what you’re planning on doing with us?”

“Your men will have the option to join my crew or be put ashore, you’ll be ransomed back for a price. Until then, you’ll be treated as a gentleman guest as long as you behave yourself.” Scott said calmly. “We have what we wanted and there’s no need for more bloodshed.”

“Your guest? Well, that doesn’t sound so bad.” His rival’s smirk was back in place as he pressed himself against the bars of his cell. “I could use a bit of a vacation. Maybe get some time to verify one or two other legends I’ve heard about you while I’m at it. I’d expect nothing less from the Ghost himself. At least we know one thing they say about you is true. It makes a man wonder about the rest.”

“Excuse me?”

The captain wagged his eyebrows. “Is it as big as a kraken?” Scott sighed loudly and walked away. God damn it, Stiles! - Excerpt from Ab Aeterno part 4

The Big Announcement!

Sorry it took so long to post about this, guys!  I was waiting for Rebs to reveal the big news, but they decided to go and spook the fans a bit with an April Fools’ gag.  Real mature, Rebby.

In any case, I’m glad to be able to help work with Rebornica on their Pilot webcomic!  Like they mentioned, webcomics are a bigger burden than you’d expect, and they can really overwhelm an inexperienced artist.

So, Rebs and I’ve been chatting, and between this, and the concept of a Night Terrors comic down the road, I figured I’d throw my experience in on this job!

I don’t have much on the art front to show for my work, but with my skill, and up-to-date software (I’ll get the new PS for you soon, Rebs, promise,) you should find my updates indistinguishable from Rebs’ fantastic work.

I don’t wanna reveal too much before the big premiere on 4/10, but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to give you guys a look at some of the concept art I drew for Rebs to make sure I could keep toe-to-toe with ‘em.  I’ll be posting them every few hours today, to help rev up interest on the project, and also so I don’t blow your minds all at once.

Keep reading

I couldn’t ever promise him simplicity and in my head I keep telling myself that he was too young and perhaps too scared to put his hands on the reality of me. I was outspoken, too pushy about the things I cared about. I remember how much I bothered him about the little things and how much harder I worked for the bigger ones. How many nights I stayed up trying to get him to understand that sometimes it’s easier to let go. I remember how many times I was there to hold him up when he felt weak from the pressure of the world around him. His mothers expectations to be better than his father. His fathers expectations to be better than him and his own expectations to become the person people would be proud to love. In my head, I’d also like to say that he was too caught up in trying to figure out things with no clear resolution so that he forgot that my hand was always resting behind his back and when he lost his balance, I lost mine too. I spent so much time trying to get him to see eye to eye with me that it left me emotionally exhausted. I spent all my love on him and he didn’t have enough hands to hold all of it and so he didn’t. I should have understood but instead, I turned very angry and resentful with him for not being able to love me like I thought I deserved to be loved. Finally when things ended, I still wasn’t freed from the burden of the hopes for the future. I still wanted to have a daughter with the name Autumn. I still wanted to travel the world. I still wanted to be able to say ‘I loved this person entirely from the first moment to the last’ and then I couldn’t and then he was gone and I miss him sometimes- more than I dare to admit. But I understand much better now that neither one of us was ready and we weren’t created for each other. But I also don’t think that we were placed together without a purpose because we were something much greater than love. We were firsts and lasts and the moments in between those and although it has been over for some time now, there is a place in between who we were then and who we are now in which we aren’t too full of pride or too stubborn to admit that we might still be in love with each other now.


After living here for more than two years I have finally acquired a bed frame, the result of which is, as I expected, that I’ve been able to fully reclaim my floor. I can stand in front of my bookshelves now! And get things from the bottom shelves without moving lots of stuff! It doesn’t change the fact that I have way too much junk, but at least it gives me a better place to put much of it.

Honestly Montparnasse is one of the weirdest characters in the book for me?!?

I’ve seen some people say they expected him to be more important in the story than he actually is and I TOTALLY GET THAT? He get so much time and then he kind of…disappears?  He doesn’t really interact with anyone in the cast besides Gavroche, Eponine, and the rest of Patron-Minette?

Honestly all of Patron-Minette tends to feel to me like they were built for a bigger role than they end up having? I think the cut quarry scene hints at it too. And like, Claquesous/Le Cabuc does have a massively important role, but the rest get kind of brushed off? It’s weird, it feels weird. 

…Anyway my point is the only thing that matters to me in any happy AUverse re: Montparnasse is having him be in a different classroom/ team/ band/ coffee shop/ giant robot control tower/ whatever the trope here is,  and forever unilaterally declaring himself the lover/ mentor/ idol/ nemesis of varying characters who don’t actually know or care about what he’s up to 

and the whole story keeps hinting that he’s building  into a Very Serious Threat but then 

the series ends 

and all we finally see of him is hanging out at the Wrap Party with the rest of the crew sulkily eating cake and pretending like he’s not having a good time 

More Digimon!

Today I got the newest Digimon plushies from UFO catchers!

3 plushies in this round-plush collection (Part 1, so hopefully they’ll release the others *W*)

Gabumon, Agumon and Palmon are the stars in this collection~ Super cute, and they have a string instead of a keychain.

(Left) New Gabumon, (Right) Old Gabumon
The sizing is much bigger than I had expected, too! They’re more like small plushies than keychains.

Last collection had Biyomon & Gomamon, whereas this one has Palmon, which I’m glad, still waiting for the others though >w>~

Can’t wait to see what else they release in the lead up for Adventure Tri!~
Also have to pick up Digimon Cyber Sleuth in the near future, so if you’re interested in a translated Let’s Play like my Re:Digitize one currently going, then look forward to it! Cyber Sleuth looks too good to resist *W*