I found another photo of Chester at the party, and it’s so cute I just had to share it! Look how happy he is with his paper crown! His brother can be seen in the background too. Just so we’re all clear, I do not advocate Crocs at all, ever. But we live by the beach and they’re kind of easy for kids to slip on and off. As Orson recognises them as beach shoes, and he was dressed as a mermaid, the two went hand in hand, apparently.
I’ve just posted this picture on Facebook with the exact same caption. Usually, when I post something vaguely antagonistic, someone involved with my husband’s job sends him an ever so polite and well meaning, yet completely hypocritical and judgemental message about me, just ‘letting him know’ what I’m up to, so he can keep tabs on me as if we were indeed, living in the 1950’s.
Mercifully, because he’s not a moron, my husband laughs it all off, usually reading the message and rolling his eyes, making a joke about how he can’t take me anywhere and so on. So currently, we’re sitting here in our own judgey pants, taking bets on who will contact him first and when that will be.
And that’s why I’m glad I married my best friend.
UPDATE: It took 17 minutes, then one text and one email was received, from different people. Both advising that he shouldn’t allow me to dress Chester in a skirt.
We are now laughing and drinking tea.
So Chester turns 5 in 2 weeks. He’s having a Frozen themed party, complete with Elsa impersonator booked. Since last year, when he turned 4 and we couldn’t get an Elsa dress for love nor money, all he has been saying in regard to his 5th birthday is “I am having an Elsa dress and I will wear it.”
So…of course he has his Elsa dress but he doesn’t know that yet, he just thinks he’s having a Frozen princess party, because that’s what he asked for.
I went through the list of children in his year at school and he told me the names of the ones he wants to invite. There are 10, and they are all girls. I did offer up a few boys names but he wasn’t interested and he certainly knows his own mind, so the 10 girls were invited.
Chester has made a particular friend and I get on very well with the little girl’s mum. This makes us both laugh as we are complete polar opposites to one another in many ways but we have the same attitude about raising our little ones. I asked her if I should forewarn the other parents who don’t know us outside of school that Chester will be wearing a dress. She said (and I quote) “Nah, fuck ‘em. If they have an issue that’s their problem, not yours and certainly not Chester’s.” As it is, I’m quite happy that the girls he has invited have perfectly nice parents and while I’m sure his dress will be discussed at home, I don’t think they’re the type to talk about me or him behind our backs in a derogatory manner.
Anyway, I’m still feeling guilty for not inviting more children when this morning at the school gates, this happens:
Mother- Excuse me, are you Chester’s mum?“
Mother- Ah, can you tell me, is (my son) invited to his party? He doesn’t have an invite in his school bag.
Me- Oh, no, sorry, Chester’s only inviting a few kids to his party this year. He didn’t want too many.
Mother- And (my son) isn’t one?
Me- No, he’s chosen to invite all girls.
Mother- Why would you make him do that?
Me- I didn’t make him, he chose to. There are 10 girls coming as those are the kids he plays with the most.
Mother- He’s a boy.
Me- He’s a Chester, and who to invite to his party is his decision.
Mother- You should make him invite boys.
Me- Uh….you pretty much can’t make Chester do anything.
Mother- That’s really wrong. You should make him invite the whole class, or at least more boys than girls.
Mother- Because (my son) is upset, and how do I explain that a boy is having a girls only birthday party?
Me- Why do you need to explain? He’s having a small party with his closest friends. What does their gender matter?
Mother- It just does.
Me- But why?
Mother- You’re weird. (Walks away.)
And this, dear readers, is why I don’t really associate with any other school mums :) I am weird. *wears that shit like a badge of honour*
For those who have asked for a video of Chester: Here it is!
He thinks I’ve been playing on my iPad, but in fact I’ve been filming him while he sings to me. Parents are sneaky. Anyway, this has had me in stitches and I hope you all enjoy :)
Happy 4th Birthday to my gorgeous son Chester. Feeling a little emotional today, as turning 4 means only a few months away from starting school, and as he’s my last he still seems like my baby. Still, we’ve had fun playing shops and tea parties and he’s now eagerly awaiting the arrival of family with yet more presents.
Feeling very nostalgic today. This was my daughters favourite skirt when she was 4. I kept it as a memento. Chester found it and asked if he could have it, and Presley very graciously (for her) said he could have it.
He’s been twirling around the supermarket this morning and managed to knock over an entire display of toilet roll, but we’ll forget about that in favour of how cute he looks.
I haven’t made a post in a long while, but I thought I’d firstly say thank you again for all your lovely support. The tumblr community astounds me each and every day in its kindness and acceptance.
Secondly, Chester is doing great. The picture above was taken just before his pre school graduation party the other day. He’s currently growing his hair “to look like Elsa.”
Personally, I think it looks like a bush but hey, to each their own. His pre-school have been fabulous with him, and not a word was said about him wearing a dress. He has a lovely little friend whose mum told me all about how her daughter adores him, and they’re moving up to school together which is great.
So it’s now a long lazy summer followed by “big school” in September!
Today I inadvertently took what turned out to be a really cute picture of Chester. I love how his hair looks, though I’d rather he wasn’t standing on my kitchen counter. It seems I accidentally hit the camera button when I was trying to coax him down.
Look! Look! That’s meeeeeee!! (Does cartwheels of happiness) A featured fic on Scarves and a coffee. Thank you, to whoever recommended me. I’m really honoured and you’ve made little ole me incredibly happy!
Just so y'all know…. I don’t respond to hate, so really, why waste your time? It’s hard to care what some anon behind a computer screen thinks of you or your parenting ways when you have a beautiful little freshly woken up boy curled up in your arms, sucking on his thumb while you trawl through hundreds of reblogs and messages of support.
Apologies for having no wish to die as you seem to want me to, or for not feeling the shame you seem to think I should. It’s quite hard to feel that way when I have such happy children and wonderful tumblr followers. So sorry you wasted your time.
I stumbled across the best comment on my post about Chester today, which implied that the only reason people seemed to think my stance on gender neutral was extraordinary is because I’m white. It also added that black people always raise their kids as gender neutral.
This is news to me.
The last time I looked, gender conformists were of all races, as were gender non-conformists, gay people, trans people, sport stars, super stars, doctors, lawyers, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, kind people, hateful people, boring people, fun people……. And total morons.
Can I please give a huge shout out of thanks to http://the-official-princess-club.tumblr.com/ for sending this photo to Chester. If you’re not already following, I urge you to do so. The Princess club are the craziest, funniest bunch of princesses I know.
Actually, I don’t know another group of princesses. But you get my meaning.
Plus, the awesome person behind the account is just so sweet, and has totally made my son’s day. We have printed the picture out and he’s gone to bed with it stuck on the wall next to him.
It’s been a mixed year. Here are some things I achieved:
I travelled alone for the first time in eight years. I missed my kids terribly but embraced the freedom once more. I’ve always been an independent type and it surprised me how quickly I fell back into that.
I had my first ever break from my disabled daughter and all her needs. I am eternally indebted to my mum, and as above, I missed my daughter terribly but god, it was a much needed break.
I travelled 4000 miles to meet someone I made friends with on twitter. Brave? Yes. Stupid? No. I’m old enough to know what I’m doing.
And in doing so I proved that you can be closer to someone you met on the internet than anyone you’ve ever met in real life.
I MET DARREN CRISS.
I inadvertently made my son tumblr famous…. And possibly even more famous than that. (Watch this space)
So I’m quite proud of a lot of things. Other stuff has been great too. Great vacations with family, kids making me prouder than I ever thought possible, marriage stronger than ever….
But also, in fact overall, 2013 has been hard for me. Too many loved ones lost- I think that’s the biggest thing- I’ve had to say goodbye to too many people that I just wasn’t ready for. I’ve seen three friends lose parents. I’ve seen two friends battle cancer, one of whom lost. And I’ve had a feeling of unease and dread in the pit of my stomach for the last twelve months.
So here’s hoping against hope that for me, my family and each and every one of you, 2014 is filled with happiness, laughter and good times.