mrs butterworth

I’m gonna open up myself a flea market And you’re gonna wish that you did And retire on the profits

First off, I’m gonna empty out all of my Mrs. Butterworth jars And I’m gonna put ‘em on a shelf With my 800 dollar a month tax free Century21 shop And then I am going to put my Mrs. Butterworth syrup jars on the shelf Next to all the commemorative fast food chain glasses and cups I’ve accumulated over the past 62 years

Then I’m going to get some plywood I’m going to get some plywood And cut them up into two by two feet squares Then I’m going to get some burlap And I’m going to cut them into two by two feet squares And then I’m going to put them onto the pieces of plywood And then I’m going to go to the beach I’m going to go to the beach And I’m gonna collect some shells and driftwood

And then I’m going to take the shells and driftwood And glue them onto the plywood and burlap And sell 'em for lots of money People will be paying top dollar For my kids’ new used new toys and clothing Then maybe someday I can get rid of that piss-stained mattress I’ve been sleeping on

—  Kurt Cobain
youtube

Anchorman 2 gag reel

youtube

Mrs. Butterworth The Movie

vine

shhh <3

youtube

now i know!