mr. and mrs. frost


🥜Peanut Butter Cupcakes🥜 

The Joker x Reader - “The Twins”

The Joker was the one that started calling you “The Twins”; first as a joke, just to tease you and Frost, but then it became the nickname that defined your relationship in Gotham’s underworld and not only. You are inseparable and heavens help the person trying to hurt either one of you because it won’t end up well.

“I wonder what happened here,” J grins, slowly walking around and kicking the bloody corpses on the floor with the tip of his shoe. “Good thing we didn’t come to the meeting, huh Frost?” he addresses the henchman walking by his side.

“Yes, sir. I’m glad you didn’t trust the location, something definitely went down.” Jonny stops in his tracks, noticing a faint movement from one of the bodies right in front of him. “Boss, I think someone is still alive,” he makes The Joker aware, hovering over to take a better look.

You open your eyes, barely being able to focus on the face floating on top of you. It hurts all over.

“Move it, Frost! We’re not on a rescue mission here,” J orders, passing by and continuing to head towards the exit.

Jonny wants to step away but you gather all your strength and grab his leg, wheezing:

“Don’t…don’t leave me…here.”

“What the hell, Frost?! I said let’s go!!!!” J turns around and gets annoyed seeing Jonny in the same spot.

“Don’t…leave…me…here…p-please…” you whisper and lose consciousness, your hand going limp in the pool of blood next to you.

“Oh my God, seriously?!” The Joker cracks his neck, rolling his eyes when he notices his henchman ignoring the instruction. “Everyone, I SAID OUT! Clear the place in 5!” he barks at all the other goons and walks out of the warehouse because he has better things to do than dealing with whatever the hell happened inside that building.

He goes to the front of one of the vans they came with, impatient to drive away and getting ready to create some chaos around Gotham tonight.

“Are you deaf?! Put her down!” J yells at Frost when he notices you in his arms while he struggles to get in the back of the car.

“I know who she is, sir; I thought she looked familiar.”

“I don’t care, drop her or I’ll blow your brains out!”

“It’s Y/N, Mister J, the one we use for our code red,” Frost continues at his own risk, hoping to make his boss change his mind, already pulling your body inside.

“The sniper?!” he suddenly asks, intrigued by the situation. He never saw you before in person, he just hires your services when he needs someone killed and it’s too risky to do it himself. Frost briefly met you a few times before because he is the main one dealing with his boss’s business.

“Yes, sir, her. If she doesn’t die, we can use her again, you know she never misses,” Jonny bluffs, not really knowing why he feels the urge to save you.

“I couldn’t care less if she lives or die, we can find someone else. But since…” and J starts talking louder, irritated,” …you apparently have her in the van, we’ll take her with us. You’re pissing me off!!!!” he growls, adjusting his body in the seat, trying not to explode; if Frost wasn’t so useful he would be dead by now for insubordination.

Jonny doesn’t answer since he is already walking on very, very thin ice…again.


“Relax, woman, I’m not here to kill you,” J smirks, watching you stumble to the far side of the bedroom in your tank top and shorts, looking for something to defend yourself with. You were completely out for the last 2 days, you just woke up and saw The Clown Prince of Crime himself staring you down and panicked. “Are you looking for this?” he balances your gun on his finger, letting it drop on your pillow. “Here, you can have it back. It’s not loaded, of course,” he admits.

“W-where am I , Mister J?” you pant, recognizing your famous employer and holding your side, feeling the fresh wound bleeding through the bandages. You have 4 more gun wounds in your body but you are well patched up.

“So you’re Y/N, hm?” he puckers his lips, not answering your question. “Hey, Frosty, your girlfriend’s awake!!!” he opens the door, calling out for him. Then he turns towards you again, gazing at the blood leaking through your fingers from that nasty lesion you try to cover. “You’d better hurry up before she passes out!” J chuckles, observing you strain to keep your balance.

Your vision is getting cloudy but you still spot the man that saved you, aware of whom he is:

“…Jonny Frost,” you kind of smile, collapsing on your knees.

“Go help her, knight in shining armor,” The Joker maliciously commands,” …before she bleeds all over my Goddamn carpet!”


Something definitely clicked right with the two of you. You never really spoke before or spent more than a few minutes together, but that changed once Frost decided to save you that day and take care of you until you got better. The King of Gotham kept you in his service when he found out you have more skills than he thought; he certainly needs experienced people around him. As the months went by, you proved your worth on numerous occasions and now you are one of the two personal bodyguards Mister J has. Yes, you and Frost are assigned the important task of keeping an eye on him all the time, even two when you can spare them.

The Joker was the one that started calling you “The Twins”; first as a joke, just to tease you two, but then it became the nickname that defined your relationship in Gotham’s underworld and not only. You are inseparable and heavens help the person trying to hurt either one of you because it won’t end up well.

From time to time your boss likes to be sassy and complain (actually, he is always sassy and complains):

“If you two are half loyal to me as you are two each other, I think I’ve hit the jackpot here, yes?” he sucks on his silver teeth, waiting for a reply but you are quiet. Great, he is in one of his moods again.

J looks at you and taps his cane on the marble table, continuing:

“Is it true love?” he taunts, licking his lips.

“Huh?” you ask, confused.

“IS. IT. TRUE.LOVE?”  he repeats, not letting go. Mister J can be sooo obnoxious, doesn’t have a reputation for nothing.

“Might as well be,” you reply without blinking in a feisty tone since you are a bit annoyed, hoping he won’t distinguish it with the laud background music in the club. You are lucky he didn’t.

“Did the idiot even kiss you yet?” and that evil sparkle in his blue eyes makes you answer in a heartbeat:

“It’s not like that, sir!”

“Is he blind to your, um… charms?”  He sure likes to push it, knowing there is nothing you can do about it.

Would you stop it? you think, not in the mood for his interrogation.

“Like I said, it’s not like that, sir.”

“Did he ever try to kiss you?”

Really?! Just drop it!

“No, because I am sure he doesn’t want a black eye!” you mumble, still calm since you have no option.

“Oh, your Twin is here,” The Joker puts his feet up on the table, amused to death when Jonny steps inside the VIP room. “Y/N here tells me you never tried to kiss her, Jonny boy. True or false?”

One look at your face and Frost knows: Fuck, he’s in one of his moods again!

“True; I don’t want a black eye, sir.” The swift, cheeky response makes your boss laugh with that insane, cracked, raspy voice that doesn’t make you cringe anymore, but it used to.

“I’ll be damn, you even read each other’s minds! It is true love,” he gasps, entertained to antagonize you. “How old are you, Doll?”

Why does he want to know this now?!

“37 sir.”

“Frosty too! You are indeed twins; it was meant to be,” he winks at both of you, snickering.

“Jonny’s 39, sir!” you cut his enthusiasm, pissed and fighting to conceal it.

“My, my, my, pardon me. Since I am not the one you guys share your secrets with, I only know bits and pieces,” J ironically scoffs, not happy at your correction. “Guess what, I have an assignment for you,” he switches gears and it’s so like him to do so.


The mission was a fiasco because the explosives went off sooner than expected and Frost got injured, prompting you to abandon the plan and return to the hideout, facing a very dissatisfied Joker.

Your boss is livid and charges towards you, wanting to probably hit you, but Jonny steps in front of you. Even if he’s covered in cuts and bruises, he won’t stay idle at his boss’s lashing.

“Step aside!” he hisses through his clenched jaw, unnerved his henchman dares to stay in his way.

“It wasn’t her fault,” Frost insists and you pull on his jacket, signaling him to cut it out.

“Who’s fault was it then, hm?  I wanted those guns and now I don’t have them. Who’s responsible? I sent The Twins to deal with it!” he fumes, pointing at you.

“It was a mistake, Mister J, it won’t happen again,” you walk from behind your friend, speaking up. “We’ll be more careful.”

“You better be or I’ll finish you both myself!” he threatens, storming out of the office, slamming the door so hard one of the glass ornaments on the wall falls down, shattering to pieces.

“Jerk!” you mumble, placing Frost’s hand around your neck so he can lean on you. “Let’s take you to your room, I need to take care of your injuries.”


You are afraid your boss will retaliate and you decide to sleep in Jonny’s bedroom at the hideout, guarding him all night after he passed out, exhausted from the crappy day and pain medications.

In early morning J sneaks inside because he needs the map that Frost keeps on his desk (he never cares for privacy) and realizes you are curled up in bed by your best friend with a gun in your right hand and a knife in the other, finally asleep also. That irks him.

Do they really think they could protect themselves if I really wanted to kill them?! He tils his head to the side, rolling the paper he came for. He hears the gun click behind him and he doesn’t turn around for a few seconds.
“I wouldn’t do that, Y/N,” he sighs and faces you, watching you lower the gun with a wild expression on your face. “You are fortunate I need my Twins, but you are NOT irreplaceable, got it?” he sniffles, surprising you by leaving without further action.

“What was that?” Frost mumbles, barely opening one eye.

“Nothing, go back to sleep, I got you.” He does as told, knowing you mean it; he wouldn’t really trust anybody else with his safety.


A few more months pass by and after numerous missions you finally have time to relax for the night. You plan to use the indoor pool like you always do when there is nobody left at the hideout. You like to go swim naked and enjoy the solitude for a few hours. You wouldn’t know, but a few times you thought you were the only one left there, The Joker was actually present, hidden by darkness, watching you float in the water, humming songs to yourself. He wasn’t necessarily spying on you, but since only the dim lights from the pool were on and you didn’t see him, he decided not to say anything. It wasn’t a bad view anyway.

You walk the long hallway without your clothes on, playing with your long hair, anticipating the nice time you will have. Your Twin was sent to deal with a few new possible business partners and probably will be gone for the rest of the night. You are deep in thought and almost at the edge of the pool when you finally snatch a towel and stop, disappointed:

“Oh,” escapes your lips when you see J inside the pool, resting his chin on the crossed arms he placed on the tiles reel, analyzing you. “Um, I didn’t know you’re here, sir.”

“So what if I am? This is my hideout. What, are you gonna be shy now and bail?” he mocks you, ready to have some fun on your expense since you seat there naked and vulnerable. Yeah, no, he doesn’t really know you.

“I’m never shy!” you drop the towel closer to the edge, getting in the water and swimming right in front of him.

“That’s good, I would hate for you to miss on the fun because of me,” he still tries to make you uncomfortable without succeeding.

“No worries, I’m not,” you get even closer to prove you don’t care you’re there both…naked, apparently. And you really don’t care.

“Say Doll,” and he takes your arms, wrapping them around his neck and keeping them there, really wanting to ridicule you but you have no weird reaction: you don’t try to flee or avert your eyes. “How come you don’t talk to me too much? I’m your boss.”

“You never ask me anything, Mister J,” you tell the truth, not intimidated by his enquiry.

“What’s your favorite color?” The Joker randomly asks, truly desiring to fluster you. Yeah, he wishes. Maybe if he would have taken the time to talk to you more like Frost does, he would know you better.

“Red,” you fastly reply, curious to see where this is leading.

“No, it’s green,” he scoffs.

“Red!” you narrow your eyes.

“It’s green!” he points out with one finger towards his hair.

“Red!” you insist, pointing at your bright red hair.

“You’re annoying, Y/N. I like you better when you don’t say anything.”

You smile but The Joker continues:

“So, who is your favorite person among all these fine people working in our little enterprise here, hm?”

“Frost!” you declare without hesitation and he bites his lip.

“No, it’s me, I’m the boss and everyone’s favorite.”

“It’s Frost, sir,” you reply, persistent in your stubbornness. Why does he think he can make you agree with everything he says?!




“It’s Frost,” you start to laugh when he pushes you away.

“Get out of my pool!” he grumbles, watching you swim away and obeying his request.

You get out and take your towel, stepping away.

“Who’s your favorite, Y/N?” he tries one more time, not wanting to admit things didn’t go according to his little scheme.

“FROST!” you answer over your shoulder.

“You’re fired!” he splashes the water around, starting to float .

“No, I’m not, you need your Twins, Mister J!”

“FIRED!”  and you let him have the last word because you don’t want to push it too much.


After half a year or so, your best friend almost got killed because of Mister J. Your boss sent him on a wild goose chase inside Arkham Asylum- he strongly believed they have some new secret rooms built in the basement and he needed to know for sure. Jonny and the other boys didn’t find anything but it was rough as hell to get out of there alive. You weren’t allowed to go on this mission because J “wanted to protect you”, whatever that means in his mind, and it deeply disturbed you when you almost lost your Twin.

** You tiptoe on the dark corridor, undressed because you want to go for a swim, when you change your mind and run back to your room, grabbing your knife and creeping in J’s quarters. It’s only you and him at the hideout. You left Frost at his apartment after the ordeal last night; he definitely needs to rest properly following sweep-the - place-for-nothing Arkham stupid task.

The Joker is a light sleeper so he senses your movement, distinguishing your shape in the blackness as soon as he opens his eyes. He hears you whimper.

“What’s wrong, Y/N? Did something happen?” he lifts his head from the pillow and you don’t reply, you just step on the bed, dropping on top of him, panting. He gets the wrong idea when he realizes you’re naked. “Where were you last night, hm? You never showed up! Nobody makes me wait, Princess, not even one of The Twins,” he purrs, sliding his hands down your waist.

“I waited for Jonny,” you whisper and he doesn’t have time to react when the sharp blade pierces the pillow, barely grazing his cheek without cutting it. He didn’t notice it. “If he gets murdered because of you, better make sure I’m dead too because I will kill you!!!”

“Are you kidding me?!” he slaps your side, grunting under your weight when you unexpectedly pin his hands above his head, upset and not giving a damn about the consequences. “Don’t make me mad, Doll,” he menaces, not knowing if he wants to grant your dying wish yet. “Let go, NOW!”

He senses the tears falling on his chest and you release him, ready for his reaction, whatever it may be; you just couldn’t help it.

But he doesn’t do anything; he seats under your body in complete silence and so do you. The Joker finally pulls the knife out of his pillow and takes it to your throat, nipping your skin and you don’t defend yourself at all, even if you are capable to do so.

“Don’t ever do shit like this again, do you hear me?” he grinds his silver teeth, really feeling pissed. You could have easily ended him and he didn’t see it coming, that’s what’s aggravating him the most. “DO. YOU. HEAR. ME?” he emphasizes the words, cutting your flesh a bit more.

“Yes, I hear you,” you move your head backwards, distancing a notch from the blade.

“I told you before: I need my Twins, but you are not irreplaceable, woman!” He tosses the knife on the floor and you get up, gulping, wanting to go when he stops you. “I didn’t say you can leave!”

“I don’t want to be here anymore,” you admit, holding your throat, feeling warm blood on your fingers.

“I don’t care, you’re the one that came in the first place!” J snaps at you, yanking your fingers away from your cut. “Let me see,” he leans over and turns on the lamp, inspecting the wound he inflicted on you. “You’ll live, no worries, doesn’t look that bad.” He wipes the blood, then cleans his hands on the sheet. “And stop crying, your Twin is fine! Sometimes I wonder if you’re his girl or mine. After tonight’s events, I really don’t know which is which,” he grouchily moves you off him, and you slide on your knees, reaching for a tissue that you use to wrap your neck with for a few seconds before changing it with a clean one.  

“I said you can’t leave!” J keeps you on the bed when you try to get up again. “You have to make it up to me; I didn’t kill you so you owe me!”

“I didn’t kill you either so we’re even,” you defy him, covering your breasts with your long hair, taking another tissue out of the box. He moves your hair away, switching his position to a more comfortable one closer to you.

“Don’t tell me you’re suddenly shy!” he points out, gesturing you to come by him.

“I’m never shy,” you reply, already in a bad mood and startled after all that happened in the last couple of days.

“Keep it that way,” he snarls when you cuddle next to him, looking at each other with a mixture of hate, relief and who knows what else. “Here, I’ll hold it,” he offers to keep the tissue in place and his fingers go around your neck:

“I could break it right now!”

“Jonny will avenge me,” you calmly answer, confident he really would.

“You damn Twins, I created a monster,” he pecs on your lips, tightening his grip but not strong enough to make you choke.

It’s true love,” you repeat what he always teases you and Frost with, closing your eyes.

“Probably, I’m starting to get jealous,” he whispers, shrieking the words.

“Don’t be, Mister J, The Clown Prince of Crime can’t afford that,” you place your head on his chest with his fingers still clenched on the tissue around your neck.

“Stop being sassy, Y/N, or Frost will have to try and revenge your death in the morning!”

“Yes, sir…” you agree, smiling to yourself, not being afraid of his threats. Your Twin will always have your back.

It really must be true love.

 Also read- MASTERLIST:

[image: killer frost, captain cold, and mr. freeze posing together for a picture. killer frost has managed to climb up so she could wrap her arms around captain cold and mr. freeze’s shoulders, sticking her tongue out at the camera. captain cold and mr. freeze are smiling softly, and mr. freeze holds up two fingers in a peace sign, his head pushed down a little by killer frost’s posing. ]

anonymous asked:  would you draw captain cold killer frost and mr freeze bein cool

yeah! cold pals with emotional issues

The Joker x Reader - “The Wedding”

Frost is getting married and you need to help him improve his dancing skills. Of course J doesn’t like it, but you’re not going to let your best friend embarrass himself at his own wedding. The Joker really needs to learn to cut it out.

Best friends saga:

You are in the gym room at the penthouse, working out like crazy before J gets home. Why? Because if he sees you work out, all sweaty and panting, he always gets…ideas and then you have to stop what you’re doing and have fun with him. Good way to burn calories, but the regular, classic work out it’s great from time to time.

You are exercising on your back, lifting your waist up and down in the rhythm of the song you are listening to in your ear buds. Suddenly, you see J coming in, wearing just his sweatpants with a huge smirk on his face.

“Oh, no,” you think, “he’s back already?! Dammit, I only got 35 minutes in this time.”

You take one ear bud out and watch him come in front of you, kicking your legs open even more and he slowly drops on top of you, purring.

“Heeyyy, baby, you’re early,” you kiss him, disappointed and kind of not.

“Meeting was boring; I had to cut it short. Come on, Princess, let’s work out together,” he winks, with that naughty spark in his blue eyes and you know what that means.

“J, I really need to work out, I need to fit in my dress. I am the maid of honor,  ’kaayy?” you try to reason with him. And afterwards I need to rehearse with Frost again. But, mostly, I need to fit in my…”

He doesn’t let you finish:

“Let’s work out then. Push me up, Kitten, I’ll help you lose some weight, not that you need to,” he is quick to add, kissing your neck.

“I’m all sweaty, you should really…”

J interrupts again:

“And that’s how I like it, Doll. Come on, push me up.”

You humor him and he gets on his elbows, this way he’s not too heavy and you push him up with your waist as high as you can, then he lets himself fall on you and you collapse back, not being to hold him up.

“Again!” he commands, kissing you.

You do it again.

“Hey, Kitten, what does this remind you of, hmm?” The Joker growls in your ear, starting to get impatient.

You giggle, aware he won’t give up until he gets what he wants:

“If Frost walks on us right now, he will have a heart attack and won’t be able to get married.”

“Don’t care, the old man needs to learn some new moves anyway. I bet you he’s boring in bed.”

“No he’s not!” you are quick to defend Jonny, not even thinking about what you’re saying.

“And how the hell would you know, Princess???” J suspiciously glares at you, lifting his head up from your cleavage.

“Ummm, shut up and let’s work out,” you wrap your legs around his waist, pulling down on his sweatpants.


You swing with Frost around the living room, counting the steps so it’s easier for him.

“One, two, three, four, switch, one, two, three, four, auchh!!!!” you yelp in pain when he steps on your toes again. You have your shoes on but it still hurts.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” Frost apologizes, embarrassed he messed up again.

“It’s ok,” you sigh, resigned.

“Frosty!” J’s voice grumbles from the couch where he’s sitting, watching you two.” If you step on my girl one more time, I will blow your brains out, got it? She won’t be able to wear her high hills she loves so much if you break her toes. I won’t be happy about that, do we understand each other?!”

“Yes, boss, I’ll pay more attention,” poor Frost replies, frustrated. He’s really not doing it on purpose.

“Leave him alone, J, he’s trying his best.”

“Obviously he sucks so if that’s his best…” J huffs, taking the safety off his purple pistol.

You roll your eyes, taking a deep breath and restart your lesson.

“Yo, Frosty, you might wanna distance yourself from my girl a bit more. You’re holding her too tight!”
“Because he’s nervous, baby,” you mutter, irritated at his antiques.

“Of course, Mister J,” Jonny is fast in doing what he was asked, still dancing with you.

“My God, Frost, you have the grace of a pile of bricks,” J teases from the couch, snickering.

“Leave him alone, J, you’re making him…auu…chh…” you soundlessly scream when Frost steps on your toes again. You have your back turned towards the Joker so he didn’t see your grimace. Jonny turns you around and when his back is towards the Joker he silently tells you: “I’m so sorry.”

“One, two, three and four,” you restart your counting and Jonny messes up. At least he didn’t step on you. “Hey J, come on, let’s show him how it’s done. You know how to dance. If he sees it will help him. Come here,” you signal for him to join you.

“NO!” J shortly answers, sucking on his teeth.

“Coooome on, please, we’re running out of time and he needs to get better.”

“NO! Don’t want to, let him embarrass himself.” Gosh, he’s so stubborn sometimes.

“I’ll let you work out with me as much as you want,” you finally blur out, fully aware this is your last resort. Jonny gulps, pretending he didn’t hear it, but appreciates everything you do for him.

“Well I’ll be damned, Pumpkin, why didn’t you say so?” J finally gets off the couch and comes to you, yanking your waist and starting swinging with you around the room which such ease it makes Frost open his mouth in awe. He had no clue The Joker is such a good dancer.
“Pay attention, Frosty boy, this is how you dance with your girl, “ J boasts, enjoying you in his arms and glad he got such a good deal out of it.

After a while he stops and lets you go back to Frost, but stays nearby.

“Ok, Jonny, here we go: one, two, three, four…” and you start moving again when, bam! he steps on you.

“That’s it!” The Joker decides since he has a short fuse anyway.

He yanks you out of Jonny’s arms and he positions himself in front of your best friend, threatening:

“I am gonna teach you how to dance, you clumsy pile of bricks and if you step on my toes, you’re fucking dead ! Don’t you dare touch me, I warn you, just follow my steps!!” J snarls and you are thinking to intervene, but then… it might just work.

Is this awkward or what?! Frost looks like he’s going to pass out soon and J has such a determination on his face that for once you don’t interrupt his rampage. Jonny nervously follows J’s steps and so far he didn’t mess up, thank God. It really might be what’s he needs to succeed in such a short amount of time that’s left.

“Why the hell are you getting married anyway, you idiot?” The Joker continues to be aggravated and scolds Frost. “It’s so stupid and useless.”

Before Jonny can answer he can tell that what J said bothered you big time.

“Mmm…why is it stupid, J?” you ask, getting more and more upset.

“Because there’s no need for it.”

“Please shut up, boss, please stop talking”, your best friend repeats in his mind.

“It’s the most stupid thing ever!” The Joker snaps, scoffing.

“And…he’s fucked,” Jonny concludes, worried, watching you as you start blinking faster, shaking your head in approval, your eyes getting teary:

“I see…” you utter. “Is that why you never asked me to marry you?” your voice got shaky and J is finally looking your way.

“Well, yeah, Doll, you should have known by now!”

Oh my God, boss, you’re really fucked now,” Jonny thinks and stops following J’s steps as he watches you storm out of the penthouse.

“Hey, Princess, where are you going?” he screams after you, confused. “What’s wrong with her?” he inquires, waiting for his henchman to answer.
The look that Frost gives makes The Joker doubt about his amazing speech abilities:

“Was I not supposed  to say that?”

Jonny lifts his shoulders instead of saying yes.

“Shit… I’m screwed,” he finally realizes, but still adamant in teaching Frost how to dance, this way maybe you’ll forgive him a bit.

“Aren’t you going after her, Mister J?”

“Not now, you flipping have to learn how to dance for your stupid wedding!” he barks. “Last warning: if you step on my toes, I am shooting you on the spot and I am not even joking, got it?!”

“Y-yes sir…”

And that’s how Jonny Frost learned how to dance for his wedding.


You didn’t talk to J since the incident and refused to see him; you went to stay with Jonny’s girlfriend, this way you can help her with the last details anyway. Since you’re her maid of honor and J is going to be Frost’s best man, you can’t avoid seeing him at the wedding. An island was rented for the wedding, far from any curious eyes, cops and Batsy. All the important fellow underworld gangsters are invited at the event. Harvey Dent still has his minister’s license from back when he was senator so he will officiate the ceremony.

When you get to the front of the crowd under the flowery arch, waiting for the bride, Frost is already there, looking sharp as a needle, yet very anxious. The Joker is by his side and you avoid looking at him but eventually you kind of brush your eyes around the area just to notice how handsome he looks in that purple suit, with his slick green hair and that devilish smile on his lips, checking you out without even trying to avoid being so obvious.

You sniffle and grip your bouquet even harder, winking at Frost and then look around in the crowd, waving at a few people,…smiling, then casually glimpsing at The Joker….he still stares at you and for some reason it makes you blush and you have no idea how delighted he is. You sure are pretty in that red, form fitting dress you’re wearing.

After about 30 minutes you have to go and sit down for a bit, your high hills and bruised toes are killing you. J is quick to follow and nonchalantly places himself right by you, sighing. You don’t say anything.

He turns his head towards you and keeps on intensely staring, until you feel your ears burning and you have to look at him:

“What?!” you frown, contemplating getting up again and leaving.

“You look so beautiful, Princess,” he smiles, biting his lower lip with his silver teeth.

“Shut up, J,” you are quick to cut him off, playing with the flower in your hair because for some reason you feel uneasy.

He takes your left hand and places it on his thigh, then by the time you can take it back he puts a wedding band with a huge diamond on your ring finger. You gasp and try to take it off:

“I don’t want your stupid ring!” you mutter through your clenched jaw, struggling to keep it low.

He slides it back on, fighting you:

“Yes you do want my stupid ring, stop being stubborn!” he mutters, forcing you to keep the ring on but you won’t have any of this crap.

“I said I don’t want it!”

“Yes you do, you pain in the ass!”

Probably you’re getting pretty loud because Frost turns around with a “What’s going on?” expression on his face. Other guests are glaring your way too. You pretend everything’s fine, smiling and placing you head on J’s shoulder so it won’t seem weird.

“Take your stupid ring back, you jerk!” you whisper in his ear, elbowing him, trying to take it off again when you hear Harvey:

“If anyone doesn’t want this couple to be together, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

The Joker is fast in lifting his hand up and you don’t remember being so swift pinning it down.

“What the hell, baby ??!!! If you do this, I’ll never let you work out with me ever again, I swear!” you mumble, upset he would dare do such a thing to your best friend.

“Dammit, woman, you know how to negotiate,” he cracks his neck, debating. “Keep the ring too and we have a deal.”
“DEAL!” you are fast to agree so that the ceremony can go on and avoid embarrassment.

The Joker purrs, kissing your hand and then your ring, so pleased with himself. You just smirk, more pleased that he is: your little plan worked.

And that’s how Jonny Frost was able to get married without The Joker ruining the event.

You’re not his best friend for nothing.


If DreamWorks ever gets a theme park:

Instead if studying and writing my papers, this is what I came up with:

  • Dragon riding roller coasters (both kiddie ride and adult ride because I can’t think of anyone that doesn’t want to ride a dragon). car choices: Gronkle, Zippelback, Nadder, Monstrous Nightmare, and Nightfury.
  • Santa would have a roller coaster (coaster will be painted like a sleigh with painted reindeer in the front. Seat belts would be there despite what north and bunny say.
  • Bunny would have a “Warren” and it would be a relaxing area with maps of the park, trashcans, lots of grass and flowers.
  • Perhaps a “Haunted House” for Pitch Black?
  • Sandman’s kiddie ride (kids climb into an airplane,sting ray, etc. the ride lifts them in the air and gently spins them around).
  • Jack frost roller coaster! Coaster would have snow and snowflakes painted on it. As soon as the coaster finished its climb,the audio would go “Now that! That was fun! Hey wind! Take me home!” and the coaster would drop; thus, continuing the ride.
  • Megamind roller coaster! good or evil? pick a side and enjoy the ride!
  • Kung fu panda bumper cars? cars being a choice of tigress, crane, monkey, po , shi fu. Viper and Mantis would probably be too small so they can be on a screen telling people how to work the cars. Or they can be car sized.
  • Around Halloween time Pitch Black and the other DreamWorks antagonists would take over the park for the day/night.
  • Guests can collect teeth to win a special prize at the end of the day. Teeth being plastic.
  • Mead hall/great hall Guests could eat like a viking! house specials would include chicken, icelandic cod, and a whole smoked eel! (I don’t care for Eel much either.)Guests could see their favorite HTTYD characters there too.
  • ROTG feast! It could serve eggnog, fruitcake, hot chocolate, snow cones, ice cream, and have golden table clothes and toothbrush center pieces.

They could sell a drink called “Plasma Blast!” Ice cream, blackberries….and blueberries?

“Stormfly’s fire” could be a combination of orange and mango smoothie?

“Hookfang’s Flames” could be a combination of blackberries, strawberries, cherries, and chocolate smoothie? 

“Gronkle’s Gut”? I have no idea what I would want served for the gronkle but something containing rocky road ice cream.

Zippelbacks? I have no idea.

* Character! Who doesn’t want to see their favorite characters and take a picture? Characters costume fabrics would vary depending on the weather outside.

Santa’s gift shoppe! You could buy your own:

guardian plushies, viking hats, Belt (Guy’s pet) plushies, croods plushies, Elf/Yeti plushies, Sherman’s glasses and Peabody’s bow ties, Costumes?,

Every good theme park must have a water park….I have no ideas on this you guys?

Why have you not done this DreamWorks? I would spend so much time and money here. Are these bad ideas?

The Joker x Reader *The Memo*

You are sick of seeing the girls working at the club trying to flirt with J. I mean, this crap needs to stop like… this instant. You stayed up all night and came up with some rules.

Finally done. You email your memo to all the parties involved and CC the Joker too. You didn’t even close your eyes for 5 minutes, and now you have to go to an early business meeting with Frost. J doesn’t have to be there so he’s sleeping in.


Mister J woke up a little bit ago and he decides to take a look on his laptop and see if he has any new messages. He brings his coffee with him and sits down at his desk. Messenger’s voice lets him know:

“One new message from:  Daddy’sNauthyPrincess. ”

“Oh, goody.” His face lights up with a pleased grin: you always send him dirty pics when you are away for a few hours. The Joker clicks on the pop-up bubble and instead of some naked shots he sees a bunch of writing. He has to bring the laptop closer to his eyes because he doesn’t have his contacts in. J thinks he doesn’t really need contacts. Yeah…whatever!

“What’s this?” he wonders, beginning to read.

Since you guys are really starting to cross the line, I wanted to remind you Mister J is mine. His sexy ass belongs only to me. Period. (I shouldn’t spell “period” but it’s emphasizing what I am trying to say.) Here’s how it is:

J snorts. This is so…you.

1.     Stop trying to flirt with my Puddin and keep your greasy little mutant hands away from him. I mean, I know your hands are not really greasy, but that’s not the point.

2.     The other day I heard one of you calling him Daddy. I was talking to Frosty but I’m not deaf. Don’t even dream about opening your mouths to utter that word again, ever (unless you’re talking about your own dad, in which case you can say it.) I’m the only one that can call him Daddy when he rides me.

The Joker is drinking coffee and spits it out all over the place when he gets to this. He starts coughing, then a maniacal laughter resonates in the penthouse. He doesn’t remember the last time he laughed so hard. You must be really worked up about the whole situation to come up with this memo. J knows than when it comes to him, you lose it and you can’t think straight anymore. Back to reading, still laughing.

3.     I heard rumors that some of you want to get the same “Property of Joker “tattoo as I have. Get the idea out of your heads. This tattoo is not for insignificant little peasant bitches such as yourselves.

“This is gold!” Mister J snickers, pleased with your work so far. He didn’t even finish and he thinks it’s the best thing he read all year. The funniest, for sure. “Good old Frosty should see this masterpiece.”  He forwards it to Frost, then continues.

4.  Don’t try to sit in his lap anymore. Even if I’m not present, that’s my spot. I don’t go and sit on your dad’s lap now, do I ?!  The nerve you guys have… Completely ridiculous!

5.   Stop winking and batter your stupid eyelashes at him. (-unless you have something in your eye or your contacts scratch your retina, in which case it’s somewhat acceptable, I guess. But try to control it.)

The Joker’s cell goes off. Message from:

Frost: “Sir????”   😳

J texts back: “I know, my Princess can be so…intense.  😏 It’s not her fault she loves me so much. How are things over there?”

Frost:” She’s still inside, sir. Me and the boys are securing the perimeter. Last time I went in, she got us 1 million over the starting price. She might get more by the end of the meeting.”

J : “That’s my girl. 😬 Frosty, spare no expense: order her favorite red roses; I want the penthouse full of them. Get her some diamond jewelry too, like, a box full.”

Frost: “On it, sir.”

Mister J turns off his cell and reads the last part of your memo. My God, it’s been entertaining as hell. Who would have known you’re such a good… writer?                         

6.    Don’t make eye contact with my Puddin for more than 7 seconds, I’m gonna time you. You don’t need to stare at him; you know how he looks like. I mean, if he has a new outfit or something, I’ll will be generous and say you can gaze at him for maybe 10 seconds. But that’s it, don’t push it, hoes!            

7.    Tonight we’re still on for our girls night out, the movie and the dinner and whatever else we planned last week. See you guys at 10pm.          

Wow, that was a trip. The Joker believes he has a new fondness for you. He licks his silver teeth, big smile on his face.

“My girl is gonna win a Pulitzer for this,” he snickers, getting ready to text you.

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