mozerella cheese

superbottles  asked:

I want you to make homemade mozerella cheese and grate it onto my ear and use a heat gun to melt it down so it seeps into my ear caveties and solidifies into a protective rubbery insert

hey no offense but what the fuck

Grocery List - Week 1

About to go grocery shopping, I thought I would share my list!

Healthy Fats

  • Almonds
  • Peanut Butter
  • Eggs

Fruits & Vegetables

  • Apples
  • Pears
  • Bananas
  • Berries (any you love!)
  • Pineapple
  • Lemons
  • Red & Green Peppers
  • Carrots
  • Spinach
  • Spaghetti Squash
  • Zucchini
  • Sweet Potato
  • Celery
  • Portabella Mushrooms
  • Cauliflower
  • Edamame
  • Tomatoes (Grape, Roma, Sun Dried)
  • Onions (purple, red)
  • Vegetable Broth

Grains

  • Whole Wheat Low Carb Tortillas
  • Quinoa
  • Oatmeal

Dairy

  • Laughing Cow Mozerella Cheese wedges(Sun Dried Tomato & Bazil Wedges)
  • 1% Milk
  • Soy Milk
  • Greek Yogurt

Lean Meats

  • Sliced Turkey Breast
  • Ground Chicken Breast
  • Chicken Breast
  • Lean Beef

Seasonings

  • Chopped Garlic
  • Basil
  • Oregano
  • Extra Virgin Olive Oil
  • Garlic Cloves
  • Basil Leaves
  • Cinnamon

Etc.

  • Whey Protein Powder

Keto Jamaican beef patty!

Makes 4

Crust:

2 cups shredded mozerella cheese

2 tablespoons cream cheese

¾ cup almond meal

1 egg (beaten)

1 ½ teaspoons curry powder

salt and pepper


Filling:

1 tablespoon butter

½ lb ground beef

½ small onion

½ green bell pepper

1 ½ tablespoons curry powder

1 teaspoon galric powder

1/3 cup beef broth

couple dashes of cayenne pepper ( depending on how spicy you want it)


Instructions for crust:

1) In a microwave safe bowl, melt mozerella and cream cheese for about 1 -1.5 mins or until cheese is just melted. Be careful with this part as to not brown the cheese. So check on it every 30 seconds or so.

2) once cheese is melted, add in your egg and mix with a silicone spatula ( helps to keep it from sticking) until well combined. This should start to form a ball similar to a dough ball.

3) add your almond meal and spices and combine well. form into a ball and allow to cool.

Instructions for filling:

1) in a large skillet, melt butter and sautee your onions and bell pepper. add ground beef and cook until well browned.

2) add your spices and beef broth and simmer until broth is evaporated.

3) allow to cool for 10-15 minutes before you attempt the next steps.

Making your patties:

1) grease your hands with olive oil!

2) separate your dough into 4 equal balls.

3) on a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper, spread each ball to form an even circle ( like you’re forming a pizza crust). Don’t spread it too thin. maybe like, half an inch thick? idk, i don’t measure shit but you know what i mean. You will have to continue to grease your hands to do this, because the dough will stick to your fingers and you will rip it! I learned this lesson on my first attempt!

4) Scoop an equal amount into each circle and fold the dough over. grease finger tips some more and press the crust down at the edges to make a seal.

5) bake at 400 degrees for 10-15 minutes or until nicely golden brown. allow to cool for 5 minutes and enjoy!!

Me if I was on X-Factor w Louis
  • Louis: Hello there, what will you be singing today?
  • Me: Just a song that yells love.
  • Louis: Oky go ahead when you're ready :)
  • Me: I DON'T CARE WHAT PEOPLE SAY WHEN WERE TOGETHER CAUSE YOU MAKE ME STRONG, IM IN LOVE WITH LOU AND ALL HIS LITTLE THINGS, CHICKEN STUFFED WITH MOZERELLA CHEESE WRPPED IN PARMA HAM- THE SCRIPT WAS WRITTEN AND I SAW IT IN YOUR EYES BABY WE'RE PERFECT. aND THEY DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE I LOVE LOU'S LARRRRRRY AF
  • Louis: *hits golden buzzer*