mow grass

So I got this ad on youtube...

It’s for U.S. Cellular, specifically advertising how great their streaming service is. You can even , the guy in the ad says, stream hours of grass mowing.

And I go… “wait a minute…that sounds weird…why hasn’t this ad ended yet?”

And I look at the bottom. 

the ad is seven hours long.

There was a guy being SUPER rude on voice chat and Matt kept lowkey telling him to calm down (because Crispin is still learning how to play the game) and threw shade a few times (saying “Welcome to the Overwatch community” and then telling the guy his voice sounded like he was mowing grass in the background due to its input), then muted him and said, “Would you look at that. It’s so quiet now. You could hear a pin drop.”

And this was all done in his McCree voice, mind you.

things I associate with the types
  • ESTP: the earth beneath your fingernails after a long day, waking up feeling full of light and ready to get up, summer evenings, the press of a friend’s hand into yours, tan lines that pop on your skin, the chill of rainwater as it slides through your hair, feet sticking out of car windows, running around backyards as the sunlight fades
  • ESTJ: the jarring echo of a microphone when bumped, mowed grass, a newly immaculate room with everything accessible, the fresh smell of rental cars, neat calendars pinned above desks, new school supplies stacked up in your room, monopoly games, sliding into a perfectly made bed at the end of a long day, unpacking in a hotel room, taking yourself out for dinner
  • ESFP: throwing your arm around a friend, gaudy beaded bracelets put together by your little cousin, the quick pant of an excited dog, the smell of campfires, paint stuck in the crevices of your hand, taking neat notes for the kid who’s absent, an instagram full of pictures of you and your friends, screaming the lyrics to songs as you ride down the highway
  • ESFJ: staying after school to help a teacher clean up, biting your tongue to try to stop laughing during class, a sticky kiss from a child, kindergarten art rooms, listening patiently to stories you’ve heard before, staggering around in your mom’s high heels as a kid, walking around town with ice cream and friends, squeezing lemon juice into your hair
  • ENTP: having to do a group project by yourself, walking back and forth to calm your excitement, desks cluttered with papers, the sound of quick typing, the rush of relief after walking out of uncomfortable situations, lying to get a reaction out of someone, the sting of tears brought on by anger, the perfect comeback, mascara smeared down your face
  • ENTJ: protest signs, pinning magazine cut outs to your wall, walking to the front of a room to give a presentation, the click of high heels, tilting your chair back and crossing your arms to show your disapproval, the smell of paint, friendly debates with loud words and wide gestures, losing track of time and blinking tiredly at the clock, perfectly tailored suits left wrinkled on bedroom floors
  • ENFP: bulletin boards with inspiring quotes, humming along off-key beneath your breath, bare feet on hot sand, pinterest projects, curling ribbon with scissors, sewing your own clothes, improvised road trips, bubblegum pink lipstick, convincing a friend to buy themself that new outfit, silly nicknames, candy wrappers littered on the floor, compliments from strangers in public restrooms, good morning texts
  • ENFJ: cute notes left in people’s lockers, talking a friend through their self confidence issues, cleaning your room at two in the morning, dark thoughts that only slip into your mind late at night, the press of a kiss to your forehead, picking out your clothes the night before, convincing a friend to come dance with you, the hand on your shoulder
  • ISTP: taking apart pens and examining the individual parts, spilling out emotions that you’ve kept tightly wound inside, the smell of rubber tires on pavement, writing down your thoughts to better understand them, clenched fists, research papers laid out across a table, jumping off a rock wall and letting the cord catch you, polaroid cameras
  • ISTJ: setting yourself deadlines, slipping candy to a worried friend, puns, stretching after a long day, downing too much coffee so you can stay up to work, drawing tablets, buying Christmas gifts a month in advance, the smell of grass after a rain, sitting in comfortable silence with a good friend, before and after pictures, old family trinkets
  • ISFP: petitions passed around classrooms, a friend’s artwork hanging on your wall, the weight of a child on your hip, getting up early to see the sunrise, interior design, vinyl albums, sitting on rooftops with friends, detailed journals from years back stacked in your closet, the warmth of a cat curled up on your lap, sleepy kisses goodnight, the walk up on stage to collect an award
  • ISFJ: buying friends gifts for no occasion, old photo albums lining bookshelves, waking up knowing that today is not yesterday, holding a bun up with just a pencil, splattered paint on brick walls, doing homework on the way to school, bitten lips rather than angry words, tentative hugs, the smell of vanilla, hair falling in front of your face when you duck your head
  • INTP: dead languages, long winded speeches that change topics multiple times, sweater vests, chalk boards covered with writing, lost glasses that are on top of your head, botanical gardens, finals week, bouncing up and down on the balls on your feet as you rant, unbrushed hair, library fines, the glow of a laptop late at night
  • INTJ: packing for college, perfectly winged eyeliner, beakers overflowing with bubbles, schedule overloads, chess games that last until late into the night, the feeling of silk on bare skin, locking your door while working, texting while walking, leaning forwards into discussions with your elbows on the table, rapid-fire conversations, makeup lined up along the sink
  • INFP: community gardens, braiding flowers into a friend’s hair, giggles, playing guitar to an empty room, yellow daisies, sudden anger, reading by candlelight, unexpected hugs, empty forest paths, make believe, whispers that you know no one can hear, understanding nods during rants, lifting someone up and spinning them around, the smell of new paper, forgotten tea that’s turned cool
  • INFJ: hanging lightbulbs, thick books where the spine curls inwards, shoulders shaking forwards when you won’t let yourself cry, absent kisses laid on top of heads, lying beside a friend in bed and talking to the ceiling, dessert left at a friend’s door, watching the people below from city windows, little notes from friends kept for years, the key to your childhood diary
Swedish to-do  list

So I got an anon asking me to make a vocab based on a to-do list, so of course I’ll do that! Here goes :)

Att-göra-lista - to-do list

Handla mat - Go grocery shopping (literal translation is Shop food)

Laga taket - Fix the roof

Städa rummet/lägenheten/huset - Clean the room/apartment/house

Ring mamma - Call mom

Läs en bok - Read a book

Köp en present åt … - Buy a present for

Fika med en vän - Have fika with a friend

Ta en promenad - Take a walk

Gå till tandläkaren - Go to the dentist (literal translation is Walk to the dentist)

Hämta … på flygplatsen - Pick up … at the airport

Planera …s möhippa/svensexa - Plan …’s bachellorette/bachelor party

Rensa i förrådet - Clear out the storeroom/storage/supply room

Klipp gräset - Mow the grass (literal translation is Cut the grass)

Häng upp en tavla - Hang a painting

Tapetsera om - Redecorate (specifically the wallpaper, literal translation is basically Walpapering do over)

Gå på en konsert - Go to a concert (literal translation is Walk on a concert, because sometimes we use På like that. We walk To the dentist, and walk On a concert)

Testa yoga - Try yoga

Skriv ett CV - Write a resume/CV

Gör läxan - Do the homework

Öva på pianot - Practice the piano

Skriv ett brev - Write a letter

Byt lakan - Change the sheets

Gör något snällt - Do something nice

Överraska dig själv - Surprise yourself

Låtsats att du är någon annan - Pretend you’re someone else

Lär dig något på ett annat språk - Learn something in another language

That’ll do :) feel free to add your own things :)

soft soft

i see a sheet ghost
it says something in watercolor
i give it my heart

joe the cat
incarcerated for nipping and scratching
i enter the enclosure
sit on the ground
joe purrs
shows his belly
slobbers on my bare toes

remember when i dreamed of a tiny house
there were berries in the back yard
baby goats mowed the grass
the air felt so fresh
i talked to the birds
you were there with me
it was good

fo4 companions as aesthetics
  • Cait: broken toothed smiles, shattered vintage liquor bottles, torn lace and bite marks, winter mornings at cold harbors, old tattoos with new ink crossing over and through.
  • Codsworth: freshly mowed grass, beds with mounds of fluffed pillows, apple pies cooling on windowsills, songbirds perched on telephone wires, photo albums added to since childhood.
  • Curie: fresh bouquets in glass vases, bay windows with sea views, fine china filled with herbal tea, old bicycles with wicker baskets, barefoot walks down rainy streets.
  • Danse: swords cast into mountaintops, metal bunkers hidden in dark woods, waves washing over jagged rocks, freshly fallen snow at daybreak, dark clouds with silver linings.
  • Deacon: out of context stills from 90s cartoons, roadside diners lost in the desert, second hand tie-dye shirts, endless horizons with wild skies, empty amusement parks at dusk.
  • Dogmeat: warm slippers, homemade cookies fresh from the oven, burning log fires, legs and paws tangled in fleece blankets, light spilling through drawn curtains.
  • Hancock: torn paintings and broken statues, anarchistic graffiti on monuments, ornate knives and quills, after-parties in palaces, handwritten letters with fingerprint marks.
  • MacCready: comic panels on cork boards, blurry photos of sappy drunks, dollar bills with false promises written on, walking highways at midnight, crumpled pictures of ex-lovers.
  • Nick: neon signs reflected in puddles on city streets, title cards from old movies, stars above skylines, smokey jazz bars with dimmed lights, partners rushing into an embrace.
  • Piper: old books and rumpled sheets, polaroids tinted with age, black coffee spilled onto hastily scribbled words, lipstick stains on cigarettes, clothes abandoned at the door.
  • Preston: patchwork sewn coats and quilts, campfires fading on forest floors, overgrown treehouses, flying burned and torn flags, wooden swords and old toys hidden beneath beds.
  • Strong: broken chain links, abandoned buildings with rusted walls, bandages pulled taut against skin, thorns and vines wrapped around wire fences, vandalized warning signs.
  • X6-88: leather cloaks and silk scarves, towers with mirrored windows, clean cut diamonds, geometric statues in stark colors and fine lines, skyline pools reflecting full moons.

Look, I’m just this kid from Toronto who got his start in school plays. I still live with my folks who make me mow the grass and take the garbage out. Then one day, I’m on this multimillion dollar set surrounded by R2D2 and C3PO. Every nuance was surreal. The saber. A thrill. The outfit and cloak? Mind-boggling. Meeting R2D2. An out-of-body experience.

the signs as random things
  • check your rising sign too
  • Aries: sneaking out after dark, the feeling of the sun on your face, the smell of freshly mowed grass, stargazing
  • Taurus: treating yourself to nice dinner, the scent of musky cologne, when you feel really great about your body,
  • Gemini: making a joke and everyone laughs, rainbows, when your eyebrows are killer, the dog snapchat filter
  • Cancer: the sound of rain against your window, the smell and feel of clean laundry, hair scrunchies, worn out journals
  • Leo: perfect winged eyeliner, the type of summer day when you just stay in your swimsuit, multiple rings on each hand, mild sunburns
  • Virgo: getting an A on a really hard test, the way your breath smells right after you brush your teeth, finding the perfect parking spot, jeans that fit just right
  • Libra: children’s laughter, the way you feel when someone gives you a flower, freckles, a sunflower field
  • Scorpio: the ocean on a stormy day, a bright full moon, staying up late and telling secrets, a beautiful dark lip color
  • Sagittarius: going somewhere you’ve never been before, the way grass feels under barefeet, the smell of pavement after a good rain, natural beauty
  • Capricorn: getting a promotion, snuggly winter nights drinking hot cocoa by a fire, a book full of poems no one will ever get to read, the perfect pair of ankle boots
  • Aquarius: the feeling of finishing an essay you’re really proud of, lava lamps, feeling confident in a crop top, crystal jewelry
  • Pisces: being barefoot in sand, hands covered in paint stains, messy hair and glasses, the last day of school

SymmRat week day 4: Role reversal With Junker! Symmetra and Vishkar! Junkrat. I actually think Satya here looks better than in my previous drawings… Hm. Drabble below the cut!

Keep reading

Here’s to us
Here’s to the kids who know the Mongols all too well
To the kids who know the difference between Brahmins, Brahman, and brahma
Here’s to the kids who discussed with their families at dinner time, the difference between courtesans and concubines
To the kids who heard over and over how the one thing they can control is the DBQ
Here’s to the kids who memorized the History of Japan video like their lives depended on it
To the kids who can tell you all the diseases, crops, and animals spread out due to the Colombian exchange
Here’s to the kids who put their heart and soul into singing the Chinese Dynasty song
The kids who can compare and contrast the silk, sand, and sea roads in a second
To the kids who can tell you if the Abbasids or Ummayads came first
The kids who know that the famed “good old days” we’re never really all that good
Here’s to the kids who have devoted the past eight and a half months of their lives to broadening their perspective and enriching their understanding of other cultures and societies
Here’s to us, the AP World kids.
Congratulations guys! We made it!

suburban gothic
  • You’ve been in line for a drive thru Starbucks for 8 hours. You have been fourth in line the whole. More cars keep coming, but they all look they same. A minivan drives away from the pick up window. You are still fourth in line. 
  • The street is full of golden retrievers. All stare into the sky and howl at the moon in unison. 
  • Somewhere in the distance, a lawn mower growls loudly. There is always a lawn mower working somewhere, but you have never seen any of your neighbors mowing their lawns. The grass is emerald green and uniform. 
  • Your cart is almost full. You stop for free samples in the frozen food section. The eyes of the Green Giant boxes follow you as you leave the aisle. 
  • Children play with chalk in the driveway. They have written the words EMPTY BOXES ARE PUT IN THE RECYCLING over and over again. The stick figures drawn around them are not smiling.  
  • Bicycles litter the street. No one seems to put them there, and you have never seen anyone bicycling. None of your neighbors acknowledge them.
  • You are at a barbecue. Is it Helen’s annual grilling party or Sue’s? You aren’t sure. You raise your glass and toast the host.