Nightmare Fuel.

So, an odd experience this morning.

I woke up around a quarter to 6, only I didn’t really wake up.

I’m not sure if what I experienced was sleep paralysis or just a random thing, but here’s what happened:

I wake awake – groggy, but awake – but unable to move. My eyes were open. Basically, I was trapped in a nightmare with all kinds of weird shit happening. Primarily, I saw a huge, wooden monster statue slowly gesturing towards me.

As this was happening, I believe I was conscious to the fact that it wasn’t real, and yet unable to stop it all the same. I distinctly recall trying to just turn my head, and it feeling like such a struggle that I might as well have been trying to lift a car.

(This monster was something else. It was kind of like a tiki statue but with limbs and hair, and just enormous.)

Eventually, that passed but I was still stuck in a waking dream. It ended when I heard what was essentially cliche horror music building to a crescendo, with the idea that there was something horrible to my left that I couldn’t see, because I couldn’t move. Finally, I snapped out of it – and snapped awake – by finally being able to turn my head to see that there was nothing there.

Now actually awake, I looked back to where the “monster” was and noticed that the silhouettes of all the things in my field of vision almost certainly gave it shape. I was young once – I know what it’s like to be massively fucked up. How your eyes might see shapes but not be able to actively make out what they’re looking at, so your brain conjures up “whatever the hell” to fill in the blanks.

This was doubly spooky, because to me it proved that I really was dreaming while awake – because the things I saw with my waking eyes were roughly incorporated into the dream.

Now really awake, I sat there for a few minutes honestly believing that I must’ve ate something poisonous. The whole thing felt like a bad trip. (I didn’t eat anything poisonous, by the way, unless someone got into my popcorn.)

So yeah I’m not sure what this was about, but it’s never happened before. The immobility was the worst part.

list of au ideas:

•"hey listen I really want that last box of mac and cheese so I’m going to pull my secret move of puppy dog eyes to get it"

•"sorry I really didn’t mean to trip and spill your strawberry mango smoothie all over you, but anyways have a nice day and please visit our smoothie place again sometime"

•"I saw you playing pokemon at the park and I really really want your legendary xerneas can I please have it?“

•"I’m an employee at this grocery store and I really don’t appreciate you having shopping cart races with your friends so I’m going to have to politely ask you to leave even though you’re extremely attractive”

•"our mutual friend who thinks we would be cute together even though we are strangers just challenged us to a dare where we have to kiss for one minute— wait how long have we been kissing again? I lost count so I guess we have to start all over again"

•"I’m reading a brand new book by my favorite author and you just had to come along and spoil the ending I’m going to ruin you now"

•"we are both athletes competing in a race and we are tying for first place wait I just tripped on a rock and I took you down with me and now we are in 10th place and have no chance at getting 1st oops"

•"hey have you seen my cat it got out— wait who’s that petting him? wow you’re really hot and have a lot of tattoos and piercings and you apparently have a soft spot for cute animals omg"

•"it’s black friday/a huge sale is going on and don’t you freaking dare take the last legend of zelda game it’s mine I tell you"

•"so I hear that you have the record of having the highest alcohol tolerance in this town but I’ll have you know that I’m pretty good at keeping it in too. wanna challenge?“

•"I hear that you’re a regular at this bakery and I just started working here… wait you need 150 strawberry cakes? by friday?”

•"wow get away from me you jerk you bumped into me and made me fall yet you didn’t even apologize?? okay buddy you can go and fu- wait… aren’t you that famous actor everybody’s been talking about?“

•"shit I’m sorry I had the wrong number I really didn’t mean to send you nudes they were meant for somebody else”

•"hey I noticed that while you were taking out the trash you were singing and dancing to my favorite song, want to do a collab?“

•"I just moved here and I don’t know this city at all can you show me around? and holy hell your accent is so attractive”

•"hey I noticed that you’re wearing a t-shirt from my favorite tv show let’s go talk about it for hours"

•"excuse me sir but I’m afraid you have to leave, you’ve been sleeping on the display bed for 3 hours and the store is closing"

•"hey sorry about that im flying a kite with my little sister and I didn’t notice you were there and now you’re tangled in the kite string"

•"shit I just elbowed you in the face I swear I didn’t see you there I was just trying to open the door"

•"your phone just rang in the middle of the lesson and it’s turns out to be my favorite anime opening wanna go out on a lunch date after this?“

•"you are the new employee and how did you manage to burn down the building you were literally asked to make a pb&j"

•"we’re sitting next to each other on the plane ride and wait is that smut you’re writing?“

•we just mixed up our suitcases at the airport how was I supposed to know that you also had a bright pink polka dotted suitcase with tons of stickers on it?“

•"you’re a firefighter and my kitchen caught on fire and you tried to lighten up the mood by saying I was ‘so smokin hot I was a fire hazard’ but that really didn’t help with my guilt so and I just burst into tears"

•"we are at an amusement park and we sat next to each other on a roller coaster and it turns out that you are really scared of them and you were screaming the whole time now I’m never going to let this go"

You do it for him,
and you would do it again.
You do it for her ———
that is to say,
you’ll do it for him.

Keep your stance wide,
keep your body lowered.
As you’re moving forward,
balance is the key.
Right foot, left foot;
now, go even faster!
And as you’re moving backwards,
keep your eyes on me.

Keep my stance wide,
Keep my body lowered,
As I’m moving forward,
Don’t you want him to live?
Right foot, left foot,
Yes, but put your whole body into it!

Everything you have,
everything you are,
you’ve got to give.

On the battlefield,
when everything is chaos,
and you have nothing but the way you feel,
your strategy, and a sword,
you just think about the life you’ll have together after the war.

And then you do it for her.
That’s how you know you can win.
You do it for her ———
that is to say,
you’ll do it for him

Deep down, you know
you weren’t built for fighting.
But that doesn’t mean you’re not prepared to try.

What they don’t know
is your real advantage.
When you live for someone,
you’re prepared to die.

Deep down, I know
that I’m just a human.

But I know that I can draw my sword and fight!
With my short existence,
I can make a difference.

I can be there for him;
I can be his knight.

I can do it for him.

You do it for her.

You do it for her,
and now you say…

I’ll do it for him.

Do it for her by Rebecca Sugar

Chronic expatism.

People have asked me what I mean by this. I guess it started off with a deep desire to leave. Initially, travelling for me was a quest to find home. I moved to the Basque Country at the age of twelve and although it defined me in many ways, while I was living there I developed a thirst for escaping the every day. My mum and stepdad used to drive us out into the mountains on Sundays where we would typically get lost roaming the dangerous winding roads of the Pyrenees or we’d find ourselves eating at some provincial restaurant in a Spanish village somewhere.
They also took me around Europe for their work during the school holidays and when they didn’t need to travel, my friend Steven and I would book cheap night trains and explore the continent on our own.

Something changed though when I went to university in Manchester: I found my home. People talk about home as being somewhere they come from, where they group up or where their parents live. For most people, these seem to be all the same place, but for me, home was somewhere to find. I found it in a place I fell deeply in love with and I still am to this day. I was like a circus animal who, although had seen many places, had been set free for the first time to roam the space in which its species had evolved. Here I was understood, I fitted in brilliantly and I loved every second of it. At university, I was largely part of the ‘alternative’ scene and often accused of being different for its own sake but my accusers misunderstood: I was delighted to be part of a group and a social seen. I wore the alternative badge proudly: growing up in France, I had no idea other people were into music that I listened to or read the books I read. Suddenly, I find myself surrounded by like minded people, most of whom were already ahead of me, smarter than me and eager to share with me.

After four amazing years there, I began to understand something both terrifying and wonderful in equal measures. I was extraordinarily lucky to have found my home so early. I had loved it for four years but my upbringing of expatism had one more lesson to teach me. Despite my childhood travels, I had seen next to zero percent of this amazing world and I realised I couldn’t I justify staying in one place for the rest of my days.

There’s just too many places out there I had to see. So, I went as far as I could to China which I didn’t much like, then to London and now I’m taking off again in just under a month to Seoul in South Korea. There are actually a lot of other reasons for my moving around so much. Girls, friends, family, and a possible addiction to ‘travel eyes’ I mentioned in a post I wrote after living in Shanghai for a while. (You can read it here)

I was talking to a girl at a party recently and she said ‘some times it’s just easier to leave’. I really identified with this and I can’t quite figure out why. Maybe because it places emphasis on the present rather than on things to come. 


Laura didn’t exactly care for this little task she’d been given. Her place wasn’t here, trudging through the darkness with her Master’s delivery girl. She should be back at his castle, doing what she was made and trained to do: guard Serpine’s life.
But the mage had assured her that the other guards would suffice in her absence, and that Moira was in greater need of her for this little outing. She’d been given an order, and so she obeyed.

At least she could feel the weight of her weapon tucked into her black coat; the long sleeves and high collar concealed the necromantic sigils carved into her body, the same sigils that, along with the black blood, kept her dead body moving. Her clouded green eyes finally shifted to the towering woman walking beside her.

“I was only given instructions to guard you. Would it be against your orders to tell me the nature of this mission?”

I kissed a pretty girl
And I let her inhale all of me
Into her own personal Space.
Galaxies, Supernovas, Black Holes,
Everything beautiful and Deadly
Spun before my eyes.
Her lips traced constellation
After constellation
Across my skin,
And in the Space between us,
I couldn’t tell if it was me or her or both of us Quaking.
I wish I knew.
I remember
That I kissed a pretty girl
Whose every move, every tiny mannerism
Was calculated and effortless and Masterful
Whose voice could bring serenity and Chaos
In a single sentence.
Whose eyes could clear a coming Storm
With a glance.
Maybe she stored them for later,
All those storms,
Behind her eyes,
Because my chest beat harder and Harder,
Pounding with bolts of Thunder
And her eyes never moved from mine
I kissed a pretty girl
And I didn’t even know her name.
I bet it was something memorable
Like Sapphire or Anastasia.
But what’s in a name?
I knew the floral print of the couch
Pasted to the back of her thigh,
The soft rolling of her skin,
The way her hair parted off to the side
In a jagged line.
And she was wearing a Red dress.
Or was it Crimson?
I can’t remember..
But I did kiss a pretty girl,
And I woke up Lost.
The couch’s print now stuck to my cheek,
The aftermath of the Storm, lurking in my chest.
I kissed a pretty girl,
And all I had
Was a small piece of Crimson Thread
I found lying on the floor.
—  Crimson Thread

KnB 30 Day Challenge: Day 8 // Favorite Special Move?

↳ Akashi’s Emperor Eye - “The Emperor Eye enables its user to see another persons body with extreme detail. Such as breathing, muscle movements, body tension, rhythm, etc. Allowing the user to predict future movements. The Emperor Eye is shown to be one of the most powerful skills as it can change the outcome of the match completely.”