I think you need to just close the fucking chapter on him even if it was long enough to be a fucking novel itself. You’ve cried over this boy so many times before, when are you going to put yourself first? When are you going to realize this is not what you deserve? When you were little would you have ever wished this for yourself? Why are you putting yourself through this? You are so goddamn important and he is a fucking idiot who didn’t deserve to know you the way he did. Let him go, let him go, let him go. There is nothing more you can do.
One day, I will give up on you. One day, I will be strong enough to leave this relationship behind. One day, I’m going to find a man who doesn’t know any better than to love me more than anyone could ever believe. And then you will realise that my smile, my eyes, my laugh, they were all right. You will realise that I made you happy, and that I waited for you. You will come to the realisation that I was the right girl, and I will always be the right girl, and it will be at this point where I’m strong. It will be then that I’m strong enough to turn you down and make you feel every inch of pain I’ve felt over the past 2 years, and I won’t be sorry because I’ll finally be with the right guy, and for once I’ll be positive that the right guy isn’t you, and it never was.