This is for anyone who can’t really relate to Mother’s Day sentiments due to cutting themselves off from toxic parents. Eternal hugs to all of you. I personally haven’t spoken to my mom in over 4 years so it’s always kinda white noise for me when this time comes around. Always remember your feelings are VALID.
“But she’s your MOM.” has to be one of the most insensitive, ignorant, pious fucking statements I’ve ever heard too many times in my life. I can’t stand people who say that to me.
It’s really so generalizing and damaging when people say things like “But they’re you’re family…” as though that mandates that you to continue to enable someone to treat you horribly. IT’S NOT OK.
For those of you who are still dealing with toxic family members, even more hugs to you. It’s a difficult path and we all have our own journey. I wish you strength and peace. You’ll get there.
It’s okay to feel upset on Mother’s Day, and it’s valid to have mixed emotions about it.
It isn’t selfish to wish you had a different experience with your mother than what you got, and feeling upset or angry with your mother doesn’t make you an ungrateful child.
Not everyone had loving mothers who treated them right all the time, and it’s important to acknowledge that. It doesn’t make you a downer.
Take care of yourself.
Shout out to all the people who are having Mother’s Day shoved in their faces even though their mothers were abusive, neglectful, or absent. I know it feels like everyone is forgetting you or leaving you behind, but please know that you’re not alone, and you have every right to hate or ignore this holiday.
Ok but I have a ghostbusters mothers day headcanon;
Patty is like the over protective mum friend, so the other Ghostbusters get her a joke mothers day card and a bunch of historical newspapers she’s been saving up for. Erin stresses out about going to see her mum, so Abby decides to go with her and Erin finds that it’s not so bad with Abby there. Kevin invites his mum to HQ, and Holtz studies them and writes a bunch of notes about how they’re actually robots with occasional laughs from Dr Gorin who pretends not to know Holtz actually asked her to come over because it’s mothers day.
It’s Mother’s Day and the first thing Kara sees when she walks into Lena’s office to check up on her is dozens of different bouquets on every available surface.
Which would be normal if Lena had a normal relationship with her mother. And if the bouquets were the really expensive kind that Kara had gotten used to associating with Lena. But no, these weren’t expensive flowers at all. They were just normal flowers, the kind someone would find in their yard or at the park. One was even made up completely of dandelions!
Questions float through Kara’s head that were supplied with very few answers.
Who sent them? Why? Were they safe? Should see get them checked out?
And then her confusion is cut off by Jess walking into the office.
“They’re from local orphanages,” Jess answers before Kara even asks. “She’s always donating to them and volunteers whenever she can. She’d adopt them all if she could, but with the attempted murders… well.”
“I- I didn’t know about that.” Kara didn’t even know that Lena liked kids.
“Most people don’t,” Jess replies easily. “Her meeting is almost over, so feel free to wait here for her.”
And then Jess leaves and Kara’s left alone with her thoughts.
She always knew Lena was good, so good. Too good, maybe. She was just glad others could see it, too.
It is totally okay if you give your abusive mother something for mothers day
It is totally okay if you dont give your abusive mother something for mothers day
Its okay to give your abusive mother something in order to protect yourself or stay on her “good side”, or even if its out of guilt or generosity
Its also okay to not get them anything, theyre abusive and you are under no obligation to give your abuser a present if you dont feel its right. It doesnt make you selfish or an asshole. And its okay if you simply forgot.
Mothers day is for good moms, no choice is the wrong choice.
🌸 To all my survivors who don’t feel comfortable with mother’s day because their mother was abusive towards them, it’s okay. You don’t have to celebrate them. She doesn’t deserve to be celebrated for the things she put you through & you don’t have to feel guilty about that. I love you, stay safe 🌸
This is going to seem like a weird post but Happy Mother’s Day to the kids who brought themselves up. Happy Mother’s Day to the kids who didn’t have a mum there to help them for whatever reason and so had to grow up too fast when they should have been messing about and being children. Happy Mother’s Day to anyone whose mother isn’t perfect, but made mistakes and is learning to be better. Happy Mother’s Day to those who’ve decided to give their mum a second chance. Happy Mother’s Day to those who’ve made the decision to cut contact and stop hoping for a miracle. Happy Mother’s Day to the people who are scared of being mothers themselves because they never had a good example set and they’re scared of repeating the same mistakes (you don’t have to be like her, you can do so much better). Happy Mother’s Day to the young mothers who didn’t plan on being parents at this age but are dealing with that huge shock and doing their best under difficult circumstances. Happy Mother’s Day to those who are being made to feel guilty for not loving their mothers at all. Happy Mother’s Day to the kids that essentially brought up their younger siblings but will never have that acknowledged. Happy Mother’s Day to those that have lost a mother and miss her every day, but are pushing on regardless, trying to hold things together. I care about you all very much.