motherfucking rock

"Hey, nerds! Who's got two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today? This moi."

- Hercules Mulligan

anonymous asked:

id love a little fic about dex/nursey dropping their gloves in a game because someone said something about the other. yknow, just craving a little hockey-induced anger.

(this is part of the NHLAU)

Nursey is a professional hockey player. He has been skating almost as long as he’s been walking, and he doesn’t remember a time before he was playing hockey. He’s won a Stanley Cup. He’s won a fucking gold medal. He has an A on his jersey. He’s played a lot of hockey, is the point.

He should be essentially immune to hockey-related boners.

He shouldn’t be turned on by the smear of blood on knuckles. His breath shouldn’t hitch at the sight of a split lip. He shouldn’t squirm in his stall as he replays the memory of gloves dropping and fists flying.

Or maybe he should, considering the blood is covering up a pattern of freckles he knows too well, and the lip that’s split has been pressed against his neck too many times to count. It’s okay, he thinks, because the gloves that were dropped belong to his husband, and it’s okay to have husband-related boners.

It’s especially okay to have hockey-husband-related boners when your husband was fighting for you.

“My enforcer,” Nursey coos when he comes into the locker room, smiling at Dex sitting in his stall, pressing a bloodied rag to his lip. He can joke through the locker room and the media scrum until he can get Dex home behind a locked door.

“Prince Charming, over here,” Rhino laughs, hitting Dex in the shin when he passes. “You can tell Poindexter that he’s a scumbag and that a PeeWee could out-stickhandle him and he’ll take it with a smile, but tell him his husband’s not the prettiest person you’ve ever laid eyes on, and the motherfucker will rock your shit.”

“No fucking way you fought for this non,” Jase laughs, shoving a hand in Nursey’s face. Nursey’s happy that Jase is partaking in the chirping. Rookies being scared of Dex only inflates Dex’s ego.

“He had to defend my honor!” Nursey shouts. “What was it he called me, Dexy?”

“Twinkle-toes,” Dex admits, shrugging because at this point he accepts the chirping instead of fighting it.

The room explodes. It’s a good cover for the way Nursey can’t keep his eyes off the smear of blood on the shoulder of Dex’s jersey.

“Later,” Nursey whispers once the noise and attention has died down, “I’m going to thank you properly.”

Asshole
Ronnie Radke & Andy Biersack
Asshole

“Took her out dinner, went and tried to kiss her
Open up my eyes the fucking bitch was checking twitter (what?)”

anonymous asked:

alright but I'm like 99% sure that jumin actually sleep around a lil to have some contracts signed, like... he literally lived™ for that goddamn company and he already said that when he's in it's all or nothing so I'M SURE HE ALREADY FUCKED SOMEBODY TO HAVE THEIR SIGNATURE ALRIGHT,,,

This smooth motherfucker probably rocks their gotdamn world and they’re like, making heart eyes at him after signing and imagining which drawers they’re going to move their clothes into and all of a sudden the security is like pulling them from the sheets and throwing them out and he’s like

“I look forward to doing business with you.”

And they’re like what in the hell why he is only replying to my texts with pictures of his cat like??? Why does he say he can’t remember my name??

And thus the Jumin gay rumors are born. From the spiteful tongues of his business ‘conquests.’

I bet they have a support group.