motherfucking cannons

After Yuri on Ice ep 7
  • What she says: I'm fine
  • What she means: I fUCking toLd yOu, YoU MotheRFucKerS. YURI AND VICTOR ARE OFFICIALLY CANNON AND NO ONE CAN TELL ME THAT ITS NOT. They fucking kissed on the ice. So it's cannon. I MEAN, VICTOR ISNT GONNA KISS SOME DUDE HE DOESNT LOVE RIGHT? THIS MEANS THAT VICTOR LOVES YURI, AND THATS WHY HE KISSED HIM. And he's not embarrassed about it either cuz they were broadcasted on national television. CANNON MOTHERFUCKERS. CANNON. *internal screaming*
Only 4 episodes in...

And Ridonculous Race has blown the past few seasons of Total Drama completely out of the water.

Two big things I find to be a MASSIVE improvement:

  1. NO CHRIS! Chris was a terrible host, always mugging for the camera, being a monumental prick with no karma, and outright cheating and twisting the game if it didn’t go either the way he wanted or if just fucking felt like being a dick. Don’s so far run a tight game. He clearly states the rules of every challenge and keeps people from cheating or taking short-cuts. He hasn’t disqualified anyone yet, but he does induce a penalty against them (20:00 minutes) that gives the people behind them a chance to catch up. No bullshit, no grand-standing, he does his job well and he does it seriously, with no playing favorites or being a dick to the contestants for no reason.
  2. The Eliminations. So far every elimination has been fair and painless. Every contestant is allowed to leave under their own power and not forced into some motherfucking cannon or toilet (FUCK WHOEVER CAME UP WITH THOSE). The eliminated parties are allowed to go home and they reflect on how they played the game. So far none have been angry, but instead proud of how well they’ve done or poking fun at themselves. Everyone has been able to keep their dignity. That is something Total Drama NEVER does anymore. Every elimination is a hurtful joke to every character’s fans. They try to make it as painful as possible, liking ripping off a band-aid and then pouring vodka over it. And if it isn’t the exit itself they fuck you over with, it’s where they end up in ‘bonus clips’. Here’s your bonus! *flips the bird* So far, Ridiculous Race treats the competitors with respect and even if characters I LIKE leave, it REALLY softens the blow to know they’re fine with it. Again, not like Total Drama who’ll twist the knife as much as possible for every character so that you honestly DREAD every fucking elimination.
Let's talk about how badass Metal Beard is, ok?

Dude is a pirate-cyborg made up of parts of his pirate ship.

Oh, so he’s a pirate robot. Whatever”
Fuck you. He’s way more than a pirate robot man. He’s a metal as fuck pirate robot man.

The only human parts that remain of him are his head and his internal organs, which he keeps in the treasure chest under his metal-ass-beard. This is some showa-era kamen rider shit. He’s more man than machine. His death and rebirth was gruesome.

So what if his backstory is badass? What about weapons! That’s true badassery!”

Weapons? Weapons!? Bitch, do you not see the shark? The cannons?

Motherfucker can crush dudes with his giant metal hands! And that’s not even mentioning the various anchors, tiny guns, etc.

“O-oh, okay I guess. He seems prett-”

  • Robin:
  • Snow:
  • Charming:
  • Henry:
  • Neal:
  • Belle:
  • Rumple:
  • The Dwarfs:
  • Jiminy Cricket:
  • Blue Fairy:
  • Ariel:
  • Eric:
  • Nova:
  • Pinocchio:
  • Pongo:
  • Red:
  • Pan:
  • Hansel and Gretel:
  • Frederick:
  • Smee:
  • Wendy:
  • Rapunzel:
  • Mulan:
  • Philip:
  • Aurora:
  • Hook: da bloody hell you two are talking about?
  • Emma: MOM! Granny is being weird again!
How much y’all wanna bet...

That Roman Torchwick is still alive?

Yeah, I saw what happened to him. I saw him get eaten whole, swallowed whole, and the Grimm that did it crashed inside the air-ship causing it to crash into the ground and explode.

But do keep in mind, this is Rooster Teeth we’re talking about. More specifically Miles and Kerry, who, according to RVB, have a habit of “killing-off” villains only to bring them back later on down the series.

Don’t believe me? Remember in season 10 of RVB two characters, the shotgun guy and Shark Face, were both in this big-ass building fighting the Freelancers when the building was shot from orbit by a MAC cannon. (For those who don’t know, a MAC cannon is a big-ass-motherfucking-cannon)

The building, which was 100+ stories tall, collapsed and fell, the two villains inside with it. And even though the fandom, at the time, thought they were dead, in Season 11 Shotgun-guy came back with a robotic arm on the left side of his body, hinting he only lost his left arm in that wreckage.

And then in Season 13 of RVB, Shark Face comes back showing he only suffered a few burns, broken bones, and facial damage from the wreckage and was back to kicking ass and taking names later on.

The point is, Roman’ s death was nothing too far from being similar to what these two guys went through. I bet y’all that Roman will come back later on down the road of the series. Unless said so by Rooster Teeth themselves, which hasn’t happened yet. :3