most amusing thing ever

All I can see here is baby!Chirrut seeing a young Baze across the courtyard for the first time, maybe with the sunlight illuminating those ears.

Baze is smiling at something another acolyte is saying to him, and all Chirrut can think is, “Oh no.”

(Credit for the gif to @kingalistairtheirin)

my cousin was drunk, and started to make a puppet show about the rq characters in a reality tv show. and it was actually very well done, farley slapping pretty much everyone, and mare getting drunk and trying to fight evangeline but then accidentally spills wine in her dress, and elane trying to get the wine off but the two ending up making out in the bathroom, and shade just video taping everything so he can blackmail them later. also did I mention maven ended up doing karaoke and singing dancing queen, and cal getting food poisoning from cheesecake. and kilorn wasn’t there because his bed time was earlier.

Maas University: Part One

Students littered across the campus of Maas University. Cassian had to slow to a stop twelve times before getting to his parking space. Peering out the windshield, Cassian gazed at the set of brick buildings. Memories of the best kind poured into him: meeting Nesta, his friends, his family. People he hadn’t seen in years.

He squeezed his wife’s hand before he turned the ignition off and peered over the seat at his children. Aysel still slept, her military jacket thrown over her, covering her ripped jeans and Halestorm band tee, her headphones still in her ears. Bay too had headphones in, his eyes trained on the book resting in his lap. “We’re here guys.”

Looking up from his book, Bay pulled down his headphones and looked out the window, his hazel green eyes filled with a quiet nervousness as he watched the students. He turned to shake Aysel awake. “Ays.”

Kohl lined blue-grey eyes fluttering open, Aysel pulled her headphones from her ears, music still blasting from them and looked out the window. Face lighting up, she shoved off her jacket and barreled out of the car, shouting, “I have arrived, bitches!”

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anonymous asked:

MariChat, “I’m not even sorry.” please?

“Mari…” Chat whined, “Please help me!” 

“Oh no, you got yourself into this, you can get yourself out.” 

“Come on, I was trying to be helpful and support your work!” 

“You were trying to be funny and failed. Although, ironically, now your pain is my entertainment.” 

“Come on,” Chat pleaded, “aren’t you worried that I am going to ruin your dress?” 

“I’m not even sorry,” Marinette grinned watching as Chat frantically tried to pull at the fabric that was clinging to his suit. “You are the one who thought it was a good idea to put the thing on in the first place.” 

“I think the zipper is stuck!” 

“Hold still I want to get a photo to send to Alya.” 

“Oh now you are just being cruel.”

“You’re the one who wanted to model, now smile for the camera!” 

“Mari!” 

“Come on, imagine you are eating your mother’s spaghetti!” 

“Whatever Vincent.” 

“Who?” 

“Nevermind, now help me out of this thing!” 

“Nope this is way too much fun.” 

“Come on, I am begging you!” 

“Not gonna happen.” 

“I’ll give you anything you want.” 

“You’ve got nothing you can offer me that is that valuable.” 

“What if I could get you tickets to the Agreste fashion Gala next month?” 

“Are you serious?” 

“Yes, is that worth my freedom?” 

Marinette screwed up her face in thought. On the one hand this was possibly a once in a lifetime opportunity for her, on the other hand Chat trapped in a pink chiffon party dress was one of the most amusing things she had ever seen. 

“Mari…” 

She sighed. “Turn around catboy.” 

Places Between Folds | Draco Malfoy [Part 4]

Character: Draco Malfoy

Word count: 1,111

Warnings: None

Previous Parts: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

*Gifs not mine, credit to whoever made it*

Originally posted by nellaey


“How could you keep it from me (Y/N), we are best friends, I thought we were best friends” “Harry said looking serious.”Harry, we are best-” he kept going completely ignoring what I was telling him “I can´t believe you keep it from me, oh and we haven’t got to the crucial subject. Out of all the guys, you could’ve chosen to date you picked Malfoy.” He let it all out with a desperate whisper clearly mad and hurt. “This,” I said pointing at himself trying so hard not to tear up “Is exactly why I didn’t tell you, you are going crazy about it and it isn’t helping. I know we-I hid it from you, from everyone, because he is Malfoy. I know what people would’ve said if we acted like a normal couple, especially you. I stood up and went back to my room avoiding any further arguing. 

I couldn’t sleep so when the light started to creep into the room I got up and tried to make myself look less like shit and more like a human. Quietly I left the room with my bad and books and went outside to the take a walk. I saw Hagrid on his garden taking care of his pumpkins. “Good morning Hagrid” I greeted him giving him a smile. “the pumpkins are looking good.” 

“Ohh, Good mornin’ (Y/N)” He smiled at me “I be’ they’re, ma babies are growin’ pretty big. Soon they’ll be the size o’ Fangs,” he said pleased with himself as he kept watering the pumpkins. ” wai’ a minu’, wha’ are yeh doin’ here this ear’y” he looked down at me. “I woke up like wanting to take a walk you know, before breakfast.” I lied. Well,  in tha’ case enjoy the fresh air before yeh go ter breakfas’” After our little chat I made my way to the Great Hall almost at the door I hear my name being called.

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BTS Reaction To: Their S/O leaning in for a kiss, but biting their nose instead

thank you to @btsgot7exoismyaesthetic for the request!

***I do not own any of the gifs***

Seokjin: 

Jin would be so ready when you leaned in for a kiss, he’d have his eyes closed and his lips puckered in anticipation, so when you bit his nose instead he’d be so shocked. He’d probably get grumpy because he really wanted a kiss and he would pout and make puppy eyes at you until you gave him one.

Yoongi: 

Yoongi would be so confused when you bit him on the nose instead of kissing him. He’d probably think it was a prank or something or someone dared you to do it. I feel like Yoongi wouldn’t be mad or anything, he’d just be confused as hell.

“Jagi, why did you bite me? Did Taehyung put you up to it?”

Hoseok: 

Hoseok would totally overreact about it and pretend like it hurt so much when you bit him on the nose. He’d probably try to fake cry and act like he was in a lot of pain, but then when he saw how concerned you were he’d laugh and cuddle you.

“Ahh jagi, you looked so adorable being all worried about me.”

Namjoon: 

Like Jin, Namjoon would be anticipating the kiss from you. When you bit his nose instead and started giggling about how confused he looked when you didn’t kiss him, he’d probably smirk for a second before trying to grab you and wrestle you to the ground to make sure he got that kiss. 

Jimin:

Jimin would be so confused but he’d also find it the most amusing thing ever. He’d be kind of flustered and blushing when you leaned in to kiss him, but when you bit him, he’d just sit there laughing for the longest time.

Taehyung: 

You could expect a lot of squeals and little laughs from this cutie. Taehyung would totally burst into a fit of giggles when you bit him on the nose. He’d find it to be the funniest thing ever, and then he’d get up and start chasing you around so he could bite you back. 

Jungkook:

Jungkook would be even more confused than Yoongi when you bit him on the nose. However, I feel like he’s pretty used to witnessing his hyungs doing strange things around him all the time, so he’d probably just give you a weird look and go back to doing what he was doing. 

***Feel free to send me any requests!***

anonymous asked:

Prompt for Clairice: Claire gets sick, and Alice finds out a lot about the redhead as she speaks in her sleep

Fuck ya’ll this is cute as shit and I just had to write it.
Alice is a cryer when Claire is just soft and kind to her. You can’t convince me otherwise.
Read on AO3


Claire’s sick, after the end of the world, and the morning of the new world.

It’s as much of a new world as they’re going to get with a ruined earth. Scorched. She can’t help but think, that they’re still doomed, but slowly maybe there will be no more dead to contend with. No more dead to take a chunk of flesh and leave her heart ruined by who she used to be. Who she used to-

It doesn’t matter, she shakes her head and refocuses.

Claire is sick.

She woke up next to Alice and panicked. Claire actually fucking panicked because she coughed. A scratch at the back of her throat woke her in a grumpy state, untangling from Alice’s arms and sitting at the edge of their bed, and yes theirs- Claire had finally confessed to Alice, and Alice had smiled kindly and kissed her for the first time in years since they met -and coughed.

Alice chose the moment to woke, and Alice was so much more human than she had been before. Claire panicked. Jumped up, scurried to the other side of the room, and begged Alice to stay where she was. For her own good, she had to. Alice grew terrified and made Claire talk to her. That same night Alice received a book to the face.

“I’m sick! You could die!”

“What? What do you- Claire stop just talk to me okay? Please?”

“I coughed!”

Alice laughed. She laughed hard. Couldn’t stop until Claire threw a book at her and told her to take it seriously. Of course, Alice only laughed harder and caught the next book before falling back onto the bed and sobering herself up.

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The time has come for Phil’s Massive List of Things Regarding Two Dorks’ BFFness from the Future (I will take a moment here to virtually bro-fist psycygni for aiding and abetting the culmination of many of these bullet points).

  • After he was let out of the hospital, Jim crashed at Uhura’s (and Spock’s) place like 88% of the time while the Enterprise was being refitted and repaired. Spock spent most of his time at Starfleet HQ talking to important people and Mccoy was nearly always busy with paperwork, but he insisted that Jim was offically off-duty and so by extension not allowed to do anything starfleet-related and delegated the task of supervision to Nyota, who arose to the challenge magnificently.
  • Jim’s socks had an uncanny habit of ending up all over the apartment
  • In retaliation, Nyota sneakily painted three of his toes purple and then hid the nail polish remover
  • It was inevitable that at some point they both realized that the other could sing (and sing well, at that) and so singing-at-the-top-of-their-lungs dance party house clean ups are a thing (more on that later).
  • Even after his full recovery, Jim frequently crashes at Nyota’s place for random reasons (ranging from “I’m too drunk to remember how to get to my own house” to “I was lonely and wanted to gossip with someone and Bones is on-call/with Joanna/being a grump and id where Spock is but I figured he might be here”)
  • She only lets him in on the condition that he do odd jobs for her like help her set up furniture or braid her hair
  • When they were at the academy, Jim insisted on getting the xenolinguistics club matching sweaters (he’s in the club okay, this is canon) because, like, it’s cold in space, so they’ll need them at some point, and at first Nyota is like NO THAT IS A TERRIBLE WASTE because it is not possible that Jim Kirk could have a good idea ever except that then the sweaters actually are really great because dang, it is cold in space, and so Nyota ends up wearing hers far more than she thought she would and Jim wears his all the time too and sometimes they both end up wearing them and Jim whispers “we’re like twins” in her ear every damn time
  • Intense Scrabble battles at three in the morning are a thing
  • The firs time Jim meets Nyota’s mom he’s both really nervous and really stoked but he ends up metaphorically charming the pants off her anyway and Nyota decides that introducing them was quite possibly the single worst decision she has ever made
  • Mama Uhura is incredibly perceptive about everything makes it a point to treat Jim like her own son and when he visits always insists that he take like, third helpings of meals and gives him big hugs and calls him “dear” and pats him on the cheek fondly because she can tell he craves it and Jim doesn’t admit it but he always feels a lot better about everything after every visit
  • (Nyota can tell)
  • (Mccoy can tell too, and tell Nyota that her mother is a Godsend miracle working angel lady from heaven)
  • (Spock says nothing because he already knew that Mama Uhura has a sixth sense when it comes to being sensitive and welcoming and warm and motherly to people)
  • There are rumours in all the gossip magazines on Earth that Captain Kirk and Lieutenant Uhura have a secret illicit love affair and Nyota finds it hilarious and Jim is kind of embarrassed but not really and Spock just sighs.
  • Okay, but hugs.
  • Big bear hugs and little squeezes and desperate clinging no no no you’re not going to die hugs and gripping of shoulders that aren’t even hugs, but still support systems, and you know what sometimes it bypasses hugs and goes straight to kisses on the forehead.
  • ACADEMY ERA ACADEMIC COMPETITION LET’S GO
  • Jim and Nyota viciously competing for top marks in every class they have together
  • Jim and Nyota pretending to be totally ruthless in their competition but actually ending up taking notes for each other when one is not in class or stopping one from handing an assignment in when the other realizes one of their answers was incorrect
  • “we have to play on fair ground” they insist, but Gaila knows it’s just talk and they don’t really want to beat each other because they both respect the other’s genius and hard work so much
  • Jim and Nyota both being terrible at Biology and having to stay up really late studying for the midterm together for the one bio course that’s mandatory and struggling with every single concept and when they get their marks back they see that they've tied and good gracious  this is unacceptable we are never studying together again except that finals come up and they both kind of flounder alone helplessly for a bit (Mccoy refuses to help Jim because he has exams of his own to worry about, or is busy with something else, or something,) until they’re just like DAMN IT and Nyota comms Jim and is just like “KIRK I HATE YOU SO MUCH DO YOU WANT TO STUDY FOR BIO WE’RE GONNA FAIL” and Jim is like “YEAH” and so they study together and end up with the highest marks in the class.
  • But they tie again.
  • Gaila laughs about it for a week.
  • Nyota being the most perceptive human in the galaxy and realizing that Jim has a huge crush on Carol because oH MY GOD JIM ARE YOU BLUSHING YOU NEVER BLUSH except that she realizes that this is the first time he hasn’t said anything to her about hooking up with a girl and so, wait, oh my God, this is like, serious? (her thought process is something like “what?” to “WAIT” to “AFSDJFHSDFS YOU CUTIES”) and so she doesn’t bring it up except for to give him knowing looks across the bridge on occasion.
  • Jim wants to hate her for knowing but then he can’t because she’s so nice and understanding about it
  • Jamming to 21st century pop playlists is their favorite pastime and they occasional just run around the house singing and dancing in their matching sweatshirts and like, boxers or bicycle shorts or something, idk, and one time Carol comm Nyota the night before and is like “My mum is visiting and we really don’t get along and tomorrow can you accompany us or something so it won’t be so miserably awkward” and Nyota is like “sure!!!” but doesn’t think to ask for a specific time and just says “let yourself in whenever” but then Jim shows up at like two in the morning and he’s like “I have discovered a game called bananagrams and we must immediately have an epic battle of wits thIS IS URGENT” and so they stay up playing bananagrams all night (Nyota forgets all about Carol and her mum) and wake up the next morning and realize that the apartments a mess and Spock’s gonna give them The Eyebrow, so they start blasting the pop songs and run around cleaning up the apartment and at one point Jim jumps out from the hallway with the stereo remote in his mouth and three protein bar wrappers stuffed into his hoodie pocket and his hair on end, wearing nothing but his boxers and the old Xenolinguistics club sweatshirt in the middle of a totally epic air guitar solo when he hears this sharp “ahem” from his left and he freezes mid guitar solo and turns to see Carol, looking exceptionally pretty, standing in the doorway with someone who could only be her very intimidating, very astute-looking mother, and the remote kind of just falls from his mouth and he doesn’t know what to say and it is the single most mortifying experience of his entire life until Nyota comes dancing from the other room with the laundry basket in her Xenolinguistics sweater and bicycle shorts, sees Carol and her mum, realizes she forgot all about them, considers being embarrassed and apologizing for about half a second but then looks at Jim’s face and bursts out laughing uncontrollably instead. And then it’s even more mortifying.
  • Carol’s mother is very confused.
  • Carol is also confused, but also slightly pink, because her brain betrayed her like half a second after Jim jumped into the hallway and now there’s an endless loop of “boxersboxersboxersboxersohmygod” playing at the back of her mind and it won’t go away
  • Later, Nyota apologizes. 
  • It’s still the single most amusing thing she has ever witnessed, though.
  • Jim and Carol do not agree.
  • There are so many more headcanons I have oh my God but this post is really long already I’m so sorry
  • BYE

its-a-goddamn-heartbreak  asked:

Cade getting sick on a date with Bradley

This may have gotten out of hand…a bit.

Words:2700


To be fair, it was sort of his own fault. No, correction; it was his dinner’s fault. Cade’s dinner had not been made correctly at all, that much was clear. He was vaguely aware of this, but thought it better to ignore while Bradley had him pushed against the brick wall of the restaurant they had just left. His heart was pulsing, sending shockwaves of arousal through his core as Bradley’s arms wrapped around his waist, nails kneading into his spine with desire. Cade’s own arms were looped around his taller boyfriend’s neck, fingers grasping hungrily at his peach-dyed hair.

Bradley reached down to plant his lips on Cade’s jawline, sucking at the tender skin and arousing a moan from the brunette. He continued to leave marks on his boyfriend’s neck and jaw, until Cade let out a growl of frustration and unhooked his arms from Bradley’s neck, using his freed hands to yank his boyfriend’s face level with his own. Immediately, he planted his chapped lips on Bradley’s soft ones and burrowed into his mouth with his tongue, exploring the familiar ridges of his teeth and the roof of his mouth. Soon enough their tongues were moving in tandem, and Cade could feel the sexual tension between them as they made out…passionately.

He was well aware that strangers could see all of this, and of course, it took less than a moment for some college kid to yell a homophobic slur, but neither of the seniors minded at that moment. They were so absorbed in each other, and the salty taste of each other’s skin, sweat, and saliva. The heavy breathing in between each kiss.

It was short-lived.

Cade’s belly flipped again, but not in pleasure. Rather, a very full feeling that quickly reached his chest. He started to push back Bradley, but his boyfriend was too into it. He quickly pulled Cade back, resulting into their stomachs slamming together with force.

That was it.

A deep, chesty belch gurgled up and out of his mouth before he could even blink. Shit. He’d actually just done that. He had just burped in his boyfriend’s mouth.

He immediately felt his cheeks go beet red, and he clamped a hand over his face in horror as soon as Bradley jerked away.

It didn’t matter if they’d known each other since they were in preschool, this was by far the most embarrassing thing Cade had ever done to himself.

“Oh my god. Fuck, I’m sorry.” He groaned, unable to look up. Bradley made a noise, which soon evolved into hysterical laughter. When Cade finally looked up from his hand, his boyfriend was in tears from laughing.

“Oh my god. Cade. Babe. You actually just did that, I can’t-” He cut himself off to gasp in some much-needed air before continuing in a voice wobbly with amusement, “-believe you just did that.” Bradley wheezed, trying to catch his breath.

“Fuck you! That’s not funny!” Cade retorted, crossing his arms over his stomach like a child, partly to try and ease the discomfort there and partly for dramatic effect.

“Not funny? That is among the most amusing of things you have ever done, man, even if you did kill the moment.” Bradley snickered.

Cade forced a laugh. “Okay, whatever. But we should probably get back now, before your dad gets home.” And before I get sick in public, he added to himself.

The nausea had been easy to ignore in the heat of the moment, but now it had hit him with the force of a semi-truck. Bradley, too perceptive for his own good, gave Cade a thorough look-over, and put a hand on his hip.

“Do you feel okay? You’re pale and you’re shaking.” He ventured, knowing the warning signs of a sick Cade from an entire lifetime of experience.

Cade sighed, scratching the back of his neck. “Ugh, not really? I started feeling bad a few minutes after we started eating…”

Bradley’s facial expression became flat, and he huffed. “What kind of bad? I’m-about-to-puke-all-over-you bad or gimme-a-few-hours-to-lay-down-and-whine-first bad?” Although his words sounded aggressive, Cade knew his boyfriend was just teasing in a concerned manner.

“Somewhere in between, I think…but really…can we go back??” He pleaded, turning his face away from Bradley’s to release another belch.

The taller boy looked pensive for a moment, before relenting. “Yea, ok. Just know that you owe me a furious make-out in the future.” He teased, kissing Cade’s cheek.

“What Bradley wants, Bradley gets…” Cade muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets and following his boyfriend to his Subaru Forester.

He snorted with amusement when Bradley opened the passenger door, bowing.

“Your seat, sir.” Bradley said, trying to imitate the stereotypical British butler. Cade flicked his forehead. “Thanks, dork.”

Bradley smiled as he slid into the driver’s seat, turning the keys in the ignition and stealing a glance at Cade, taking in his milky pallor and queasy expression. He was looking out the window, leaning the bottom half of his face onto his hand, elbow on the window’s edge, fingers covering his mouth.

His position didn’t stop the sickly belches slipping past his lips being audible, not did the burps themselves alleviate his discomfort. At least he wasn’t embarrassed to let it happen, otherwise he already would have been sick; that he was sure of.

They were only a few miles from the neighborhood when Cade’s condition took a turn for the worst.

His abdomen was clenching over and over, sending splashes of acid into the back of his throat, a terribly familiar sour feeling washing through his gut, eliciting a long, airy burp that almost turned into a retch.

Bradley shot him a sympathetic look, reaching over to squeeze his bicep. “Want me to pull over?”

Cade didn’t say anything but shook his head slowly, breathing heavily through his nose, trying desperately to quell the nausea assaulting him without a moment’s pause.

He only lasted about a minute like that. Bradley was no fool, and Cade threw up often enough from his stomach issues that it wasn’t hard to tell when it was about to happen anymore. Pulling his car over, Bradley unbuckled his and his boyfriend’s seatbelts, hopping out and crossing to the passenger side, flinging open the door and helping Cade into the cool night air.

Immediately after getting out of the car, a jarring belch left Cade’s mouth, morphing into a wet heave. He gagged three more times before managing to burp up a thick mouthful of vomit that left his nose feeling clogged. He panted, bracing a hand on his knee and the other against his angry stomach. It felt distended, and he belched loudly several times, trying to relieve himself.

Bradley furrowed his eyebrows, rubbing his slender palm across Cade’s muscled shoulders and upper back, trying to coax up whatever was making him so miserable.

The force of the nausea and Bradley’s ministrations worked quite well, for the next moment Cade dislodged a massive burp that turned into a projectile stream of vomit at the end, splattering forcefully onto the edge of the sidewalk and leaving some running down the curb, a stark orange-brown against grey contrast.

A moan escaped him, and he pitched forward in utter misery as another round of sick hit the ground, adding on to the pile with a sickening squelch.

“Jesus Christ, babe.” Bradley whispered. His boyfriend was very surprisingly ill considering twenty minutes ago they were making out against the side of a restaurant’s brick wall.

“Holy fuck….this -brrurrp- feels fucking awful…” Cade’s voice sounded miserable, hoarse and even huskier than usual.

“I know, Cade.” Bradley soothed as best he could, but he had never been known for his caretaking skills.

They stood there in the chilling darkness for what felt like hours, the only sound being gags, sickly burps, and pants from Cade. There wasn’t much Bradley could do except continue to rub his back and offer as much comfort as possible.

When Cade’s nausea finally started to subside for a few seconds and he wasn’t throwing up anymore, Bradley ushered him back into the car, eager to get home and out of the cold.

“Damn, I’m sorry babe.” He smiled sadly, grabbing a pack of tissues from his glove box and using one to wipe off Cade’s mouth. The sick boy was too tired and ill to have remembered to do it himself.

“T’s fine…thanks…” His boyfriend’s slurred in response, closing his eyes. Bradley reached over to recline Cade’s seat, helping him to sit back.

Just as they pulled into Bradley’s driveway, Cade jerked upright with a painfully deep belch, and another thick amount of sick tumbled from his lips, running down his chin and falling into his lap, some of the liquid portion ending up under his shirt and running down his bare chest. He felt so sick, and he was so embarrassed. His emotions welled up behind his eyes, and he couldn’t stop fat tears from rolling down his flushed cheeks. He hiccuped, and another mouthful joined the mess onto his shirt.

“Oh, baby…I’m so sorry.” Bradley whispered, getting out of the car and walking to the passenger side door, opening it and immediately kissing Cades temple. “Shh, it’s okay.” Bradley sounded calm, but in reality he was worried. Cade very rarely cried.

“Feels so bad, Brad.” Cade cried, choking on a sob and stepping out of the car, letting the vomit on his lap slop messily to the pavement beneath his feet. He looked up at Bradley and buried his face into his chest. Bradley made a sympathetic noise, carding his slender fingers through Cade’s well-groomed hair, trying his best to ignore the puke stains that would undoubtedly be left on his shirt.

“I know, Cade. Just breathe, okay? You’re only this upset because you’re probably running a fever, right? So it’s okay, just breathe.” Cade was notorious for having hidden fevers, so that you couldn’t tell just from feeling his skin. Bradley, in a method he used to try and calm injured players on the basketball court, began to verbally guide his boyfriend to take deep breaths, and used their position as an advantage to sync his breathing with that of Cade’s.

Cade followed his instructions, and after a minute or so pulled away, rubbing his eyes to clear the tears in a fashion similar to that of a young child.

“Why don’t we go to your house instead, so we can get you cleaned up and comfortable, hm?” Bradley suggested quietly. He’d never been more relieved to be neighbors with his boyfriend. Cade nodded, and Bradley grinned, leading him across the front yard and into Cade’s own driveway.

It was 12 am, and Cade’s parents were on a mission trip in Zimbabwe for the next month, so Faye would be the only one home, and there was a good chance Tate was with her. Bradley, having a key to Cade’s house on his own ring of various keys, unlocked the door quickly and helped Cade inside, waiting for him to slip his sneakers off clumsily. Faye would more than likely be up at this late, so Bradley took a chance in calling her name out.

“Faye?!” He yelled into the silent house, hoping he hadn’t woken up the Sassy Twin™. Thankfully, a small figure soon popped around the corner, and she began a greeting only to pull back in shock.

“Cade?! What happened?!” She exclaimed in surprise and concern, looking Cade up and down with furrowed brows and a prominent frown. Her shock elicited a surprising reaction from the sick teen, who’s eyes began to well up again, thinking she was angry through his fever induced-delirium.

Bradley mouthed ‘sick’ and motioned something akin to vomiting with his arms. Faye scoffed, “Well no shit ya genius, he’s covered in vomit.” she approached Cade and wiped his tears away with her thumbs.

“Okay big guy,” She soothed her brother, “Bradley here is gonna run and get the thermometer in the bathroom cabinet, yea?” Bradley shot her a glare, but complied, trudging up the familiar stairs.

Faye smiled and turned back to Cade. She usually wasn’t so gentle with her twin, but he was obviously running a fever, and for as long as she could remember, he had always been reduced to the state of an emotional, delirious child when feverish.

“Okay, let’s get that gross shirt off of you. I’ll get you a clean one, just give that to me and I’ll throw it in the wash for you.” Faye said gently, reaching out to grab his sleeve.

When she looked up, Cade had stopped listening and his eyes were closed, he had the back of his hand to his mouth, and was breathing heavily. “Cade? You alright?” Faye ventured slowly, unsure if he was about to be sick. He didn’t respond, but his chest hitched and he accidentally let out a heavy belch towards her face, and he mumbled something that was probably akin to excusing himself or an apology. She cringed, but didn’t punch him like she usually would. She could actually hear his chest rumbling. He must have really felt awful. His upper body jumped again and another deep, painful sounding belch pushed past his slightly open mouth, and Faye’s unease grew. She knew he was trying really hard not to be sick.

“Okay, bro, come on. Let’s get you in the bathroom.” She said quietly, not quite sure how he would respond.

“Mmm…not gonna- HicURrp -make it…” He shuddered after a moment, swallowing the saliva pooling in his mouth rapidly. His stomach was absolutely stewing, bubbling and churning. His chest felt sour, increasing his nausea tenfold.

“Ah, um, shit. Okay, it’s okay, I’ll get something… Faye trailed off incoherently, sprinting to the kitchen and searching for a bowl. She jumped up on the marble countertop and swung open the glass-paned cupboard, grabbing a plastic mixing bowl. She was feeling hopeful, but when she turned to the kitchen doorway her brother stood there, looking incredibly nauseous. The sight of the dirty dishes with remnants of food in the sink set Cade off before she could even blink, and she stopped dead as the taller twin belched, ending the sick noise with a splatter of dinner onto the linoleum flooring, and he let out a sob, completely breaking down for a third time.

Faye was terrified. She’d never seen her brother this sick, and this upset because of it.

“I’m sorry…” He cried, devolving into a coughing fit after another mouthful of vomit, adding to his ever growing amount of lost fluids.

“Jesus, Cade.” Faye whispered. This was bad. She looked up to see Bradley, looking scared.

“I think we need to go to the hospital, sweet.” He said, crouching down next to the sobbing teen and shushing him as Faye handed Bradley the bowl. He held the bowl under Cade’s chin, and his brows furrowed even further when the brunette was plagued with dry heaves that refused to let up until a small stream of mostly acid finally came up, along with the very last of everything in his belly. Cade gagged so sharply that his ears turned red, and he scrunched his face in pain, tears and sobs tearing from his fever-riddled body unhindered.

Bradley used a paper towel to wipe Cade’s tears and then his mouth, whispering sweet nothings all the while.

“Faye, go get my car started, here’s my keys.” Bradley instructed without looking up, tossing his ring of keys to Faye.

“Shouldn’t we get your dad?” Faye asked uncertainly. Bradley shook his head.

“He’s working the graveyard shift ten-to-six tonight. I’m not a minor anymore, it’ll be fine.” He reassured her, reaching up to give the small girl’s shoulder a squeeze.

She let out a shuddering breath, collecting a large trash bag and a bottle of water, handing the water to Bradley and heading towards the door.

Bradley uncapped the water and had Cade stand straight up, holding it to his lips and allowing water to dribble slowly into Cade’s acid-ridden mouth. Pulling the water away, he smiled. “Okay big guy, let’s get you some help.”

exo boyfriend!baekhyun

•"hey, y/n,“

•"oh hey, Baek,”

•"let’s go out sometime,“ *wink* *wink*

•istg, nothing is boring when you’re with him

•he gets peed off if you ever do get bored whilst you’re with him

•teasing…oh god, the teasing

•running his ever so beautiful hands through your hair whenever you two cuddle and watch films

•in the mornings, you think it’s peaceful

•please. for your sake, think again my love

•"omg omg omg omg y/n y/n wake uppppppp!!!”

•"WHAT?!“

•"geez don’t have to shout, gosh it’s too early,” *sassily walks away*

•taking selcas with each other

•having a singing battle and he lets you win but later on just randomly belts a high note, just to make sure you know that deep down he’s better

•he wants to go gym with you and you agree (to his surprise, he thought you’d be all like “no babe, you’re perfect already”)

•when you get there, he sits on the treadmill eating food and watching you run

•then he wants to get it “down” with you at that very moment, ;))))

•but you’re all like, “gross Baek I’m sweaty,” but cause he’s a perverted beagle he’s like “that’s even hotter”

•holding hands just as much as you guys can

•you wear his clothes , so he steals yours

•"we are even!“

•"Baekhyun! They don’t even fit you!”

•you need to study and he asks you if you need any help but ends up sleeping the first half an hour into it

•dating Baek is like babysitting an annoying 5 yr old

•chanyeol is over every day

•it ticks you off so you’re hinting towards chanyeol to kindly get lost

•"hey chan? Didn’t you tell me you needed to go and do something today?“

•"ummm…no? I haven’t even texted you today,”

•"please do me a favour?“

•"yeah?”

•"get out of my house"

•ngl, but you’re gonna get so many haters

•but dw, baekhyuns there to protect you! He’s superbaek!

•having to tell Kyungsoo that whatever Baekhyun did, he didn’t mean it

•random pecks on each other’s cheeks

•having to put up with his really bad attempts at English songs

•one day you realise his accent is becoming worse so you decide to help him

•"all I want for Christmas is you!“

•"oral I wanteu for keurismaseu is you?”

•he accidentally falls in front of you and feels embarrassed but when he sees you laughing, he begins to be more comfortable whilst laughing with you!

•so, to summarise, dating Baekhyun will be the most funniest, amusing and greatest thing ever! He’s got a really “wide” personality that you just can’t help but love, everything he does is to make you happy. Whether that’s falling down on stage, embarrassing himself, showing his Nutella abs, ect. It’s all for you! He’s good at hiding his “bad” emotions so you think that he doesn’t care but really he does, appreciate the time with him my friend!

Originally posted by ethereal-baek

anonymous asked:

Watching @ask-googleirlrp slowly kill you is the most amusing thing ever. And the fact that the nickname affects you so much is adorable. You're blushing, aren't you?

Pffffft, me? Blushing? Pleaaaaseeee. I would neverrrr~

Also my death is not a joking matter youngster I do not appreciate.

….. Why did I ever reveal my weakness ahhh.

Destiel Wisdom Teeth

Sorry guys, I had to write this.

-|-

Dean shrugged and shook his head. “Sorry Cas, but they gotta come out. If they don’t, you’ll be in more pain than you are now.”

Cas grumbled huffily and glowered at Sam, who was chuckling with the doctor. “My brother, the green eyed blond there, will be here to take him home.”

The doctor nodded, and smiled at said blond. “He’ll very out of it when we are done. Right this way Mr. Novak, don’t worry, you’ll sleep through it till we’re done.”

-|-

To say this was the most amusing thing he’d ever seen wouldn’t cut it. Cas, due to being human, had a very strong reaction to the drugs. The moment the ex angel saw Dean, his pretty blue peepers lit up like a couple of Christmas lights and he grinned. “Dean! Theeeey…..whoa….they gave me…pa-party juice!”

Dean chuckled and nodded to the nurses. “Party juice?”

A brunet snorted. “We have no fuckin’ clue man. Gave him the gas, then once he was loopy enough to put him under, we gave him a party hat to distract him from the needle. Then when told it was a party hat, he wiggled around the chair and sorta sing songed ‘Partaaaay’ and promptly fell asleep.”

-|-

“You’re joking.”

“I’m dead serious Cas. But babe, the best part is when we got home. I went to get you ready for bed, and you slapped my hand away from your waist and squealed, 'I’M TAKEN!’ ”

Question of the day -

Have you ever slept with a sleep talker?

It’s either incredibly amusing, or the most frightening thing ever.

Becky used to grab my arm and wake me and say the most silly shit ever, stuff like “The ducks don’t like wearing my pants!” She’d say it in the most frantic, profound way, like she had just discovered the meaning of life and we must alert the president and the UN NOW!

Jessica would calmly utter the most frightening things you could ever imagine. Stuff like “I removed all of his organs but he still won’t stop smiling at me.” Or the time she rolled over, put her hand on my face and said “I could take all of your skin off … don’t worry… it’ll fit”

Yeah… sleeping with people is weird.

Haikyuu!! Headcanons (Karasuno)

AN: This is really long, I’m sorry! I hope you like them anyway, I had a lot of fun writing this!


Hinata: Ahh my smol child. He’s literally just one giant tickle spot, okay. Like if your hand even gets too close to his side, he’ll jump away with wide eyes. Suga tickles him a lot, mostly just gentle squeezes to the back of his neck to quiet him down when he’s talking too loud, or pokes to his sides or ribs when he’s too hyper to concentrate on practice. Noya and Tanaka will gang up on Hinata from time to time, one of them pinning him to the floor while the other digs their fingers into as many of Hinata’s tickle spots they can find until he’s kicking and screaming with hysterical laughter. Kageyama will tickle him occasionally, but sometimes he gets embarrassed by it because Hinata is so loud and bby Kags is so hesitant towards any kind of physical contact. But when he does tickle Hinata, he usually wraps his hands around Hinata’s waist and squeezes as fast as he can, which never fails to send Hinata into loud, raucous giggles. As a ler, Hinata’s pretty good at knowing what places will get people the most. This is partially because he has a little sister, and partially because he’s always been subjected to the most tickles from his friends because of his size and learned how to fight back. But if you even graze one of Hinata’s tickle spots, it’s Game Over for him. He’s ticklish eeeeverywhere, but I think Hinata’s most ticklish spots would be his thighs (especially when you dig your fingers in his inner thighs), his belly (the woooorst for him, omg. Especially little claw tickles), and his neck/collarbones. If you get his armpits for a while, he’ll become more sensitive to the tickles and they’ll slowly become awfully ticklish. He’s a thrasher, folks; he squirms and kicks and screams, but it’s sooo easy to pin him down because he’s just so little and so ticklish. 

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Watching genderists try so hard to define male and female without referring to biology is the most amusing thing ever istg HOW can they do this and not realise their ideology is flawed at the core?