mortifier

It’s a good thing that I love you

Pairing: Finn Balor/You

Summary: You’ve always said that you’re boyfriend was capable of fucking you through the mattress. Why did he have to take it so literally ? a/n: this is short and stupid. Also despite the subject matter not smutty. I mean there’s mention of sex, so.

Tags: @the-geekgoddes

You have never been more embarrassed in your life. Finn, the idiot, is laughing so hard he’s no longer making noise. You are mortified. Maybe you’d be laughing along with your giggling boyfriend if it wasn’t for the fact you knew this was going to be a story he told all your friends. Damn him.

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anonymous asked:

ok ok but like, imagine Lance and Pidge have been pining all this time (canon? heh) and meanwhile everyone has noticed but decided to let them find out by themselves (mostly because it's fun watching them so oblivious to their own feelings) and then they get Matt back, and Matt just doesn't do subtlety when he sees what's happening between them and starts teasing his lil sis and she's like "??? whaT nO" and now she's Aware and a Mess

Listen I live for meddling big brother matt okay. He’ll think he’s helping but he’s just making awkward dorks even more awkward and dorky. He’ll be talking to Lance and something just vaGUELY RELATED to pidge will come up and he has to talk her up. Lance just chalks it up to good sibling relationship but Pidge is mortified when she finds out. 

Pidge just gets mercilessly teased like she did when they were kids. Its the worst. Matt’s usually good about only teasing her when it’s only the two of them but sometimes he slips up and says something telling in front of everyone. Lance is heartily confused and everyone else is secondhand embarrassed. 

Jaxter thought: 

At a stage where they are not quite sure where they would stand with Damas if he knew of their relationship, Jak is kind of nervous about being openly affectionate with Daxter around his father. But for a moment, emotions get the better of them, and they don’t think about it and they give in to a kiss, and Damas happens to see. They both freeze up and no one wants to talk first, and the boys are a bit mortified, until, in his stoic way, Damas just has a reaction like Garnet in Steven Universe: 

and leaves them alone. 

Joke’s on the boys, Damas already clued into their real relationship a while ago.

I’m listening to LDR’s radio and she’s like “I’m playing on the radio” and it gave me a flashback to that one time where I was invited as a high school student to a radio talk show for whatever reason I literally don’t remember what we were talking about except it was some type of fake deep sjw shot and there was this white guy talking and I was like yeah jimothy made a good point and he was like actually my name is kevinathan…. I was mortified but in hindsight mood I still can’t remember any guys name

I was at the shop for some dinner ingredients, and while I’m spacing out due to lack off sleep some little kid remarked to his mom that I look like “one of those people on the streets.”

The mom shushes him and tell him that’s not nice to say.

She then catches my eye and looks mortified.

Because hello.
I was your nurse last week.

Guess why I look like I haven’t slept in a week?

I’ve not seen someone apologise and run away so fast in quite some time.

chris--daae  asked:

e/c + Night out headcanon ? 💜

Wow I’m totally just getting to this, sorry!

* Erik and Christine’s first official ‘date’ was disastrous. Erik invited her out on one of his rare recreational activities and she agreed. Little did she know that meant Erik would be taking her out to an underground pub and fighting club. She was mortified, Erik had a great time. She did win a decent sum of money from (reluctantly) betting, but she gave all of her winnings to Erik.

* Christine loves to take walks around the park at night, and Erik is always eager to join her. Occasionally, if he’s sure no one is looking, he will even lower his mask from his face so that he can feel the cool night breeze.

* There’s a traveling fair that will occasionally stop by their town for a few weeks, and Erik is old acquaintances (he refuses to say friends) with the owner. Any time the fair is in town, Erik will take Christine after dark to enjoy the night shows and attractions.

* Sometimes when Erik is on edge for whatever reason, Christine will demand that he take her out. He’ll grumble and eventually agree, and he always feels better after.

in case anyone wants to know what lin is up to these days here is a fun fact that i forgot to share with you the other week: not only is he doing an english accent for mary poppins, hes going like ALL OUT with his accent training and even does it when hes not in character, like apparently he shows up at family gatherings with an english accent and weirds people out

In class today, Trump was somehow brought up and someone said that Trump was a neo-nazi and my professor was like, “Trump hasn’t ever said he was a neo-nazi” and another kid said, “I was still gay before I started calling myself gay!” and realized what he said and he looked just mortified but it was the greatest response to anything I’ve ever heard

My best friend and I were holding hands while shopping with my family today and my mum was like “Girls, can you link arms instead? You’re getting funny looks, people are going to think you’re lesbians” so I got the ring off my index finger and proposed to her in the middle of the street

i actually love the idea of every american adult having low-simmering resentment of steve because of that captain america challenge

like steve finds out about the tapes years later and he’s so so so quietly mortified that his physical fitness regimen for soldiers was adapted into a feel good 80s PE clip especially bc exercises in the 30s were fucking weird

and he’s even more horrified when he realizes everyone is gonna hold this against him forever

“hawkeye, shoot!” “NO, i already gave you an entire year of my life in burpees, now you want this too?” “just take the shot clint”

“steve rogers huh” “yeah, nice to meet you mr. uh, starlord–” “500 PUSHUPS!!!!!!!! FIVE. HUNDRED. i was ten. and you’re a dick”

79 percent of tony’s rage at steve is actually bc of that fucking challenge, like sure his dad ignored him bc he was obsessed with finding captain america but more importantly tony had to do sit ups bc of steve….sit ups

give me this. give me all of this.

pls keep Good Temple Boy Baze in ur thoughts as he tries some teenage rebellion in the hopes that Chirrut will think he’s cool (jokes on him Chirrut’s only acting out for his attention) and he gets drunk and really clingy and handsy and OVERT in a way Baze never is, and Chirrut can’t deal and runs away to blush in private because ohgod, Baze is hanging off his shoulders and slurring about how incredible Chirrut looked that one time three months ago, and that other time, and right now-

thus the beginning of Chirrut being a tad more responsible because he loves Good Temple Boy Baze and he wants him to be lucid when (if) he ever says these things again. And he doesn’t want to torture himself with Grinning Octopus Baze before they’ve even held hands, god

only a tad more responsible, though. not much

(in the chaos of post-scarif celebration, Chirrut can’t anticipate and intercept all the congratulatory drinks pressed into Baze’s hand, but he’s still able to make red faced excuses and a hasty exit for them both when things start heading towards the point of no return)

anyways, better, more wholesome brook jokes to replace his thing with panties:

  • him and franky will turn a scene into a musical at random moments
  • his sense of gentleman etiquette is outdated and so he will do things like stand whenever a lady walks into a room, run over and pick up whatever a lady drops, and randomly help ladies across the street or help them out of a vehicle without warning. it’s only a little awkward on the ship but it’s mortifying in public. sanji tries his best to teach him modern etiquette but brook is scandalized by his cursing and how he smokes in front of ladies
  • people will talk to him for a while. he’s actually asleep.
  • he gets stabbed and freaks out but the sword has gone between his ribs.
  • franky’s tech fuckin blows his mind and from then on he assumes that any machine or weapon he doesn’t recognize does incredibly improbable things, or expects franky to have unreasonably specific gadgets for every situation. 
  • robin mentions important historical events, everybody turns to brook and asks if he remembers it. even if it happened 800 years ago
  • that’s all i can think of for now