Book of Mormon (Act 1) Starter Pack
  • "Hello!"
  • "Have fun in Hell."
  • "This book will change your life!"
  • "France! Land of pastries and turtlenecks!"
  • "Where is that?"
  • "Oh boy! Like Lion King!"
  • "Oh, He answered YOUR prayer?"
  • "Tomorrow is a latter day."
  • "Alright, just remember to do whatever ____ tells you to do."
  • "Don't worry, my little problem is in check."
  • "I lie a lot!"
  • "We got Mrs Brown to sing like an African for you."
  • "All of my friends always end up leaving me but... You can't!"
  • "Are you a Star Wars guy or a Star Trek guy?"
  • "I've always had the hope that on the day I go to Heaven, Heavenly Father will shake my hand and say 'You've done an awesome job, _____.'"
  • "I'll do something incredible that blows God's freaking mind!"
  • "Hasa diga Eebowai!"
  • "But having a saying makes it all seem better."
  • "Raise your middle finger to the sky and curse His rotten name!"
  • "Fuck you God!"
  • "'F you' to Heavenly Father?! Holy moly, I said it like thirteen times!"
  • "If you don't like what we say, try living here a couple days."
  • "Fuck you in the eye."
  • "There are certainly a lot of things here in ____ that can be... disturbing."
  • "Don't feel those feelings. Hold them IN instead."
  • "Now don't you dare start crying."
  • "I thought about us on a deserted island. We'd swim naked and in the sea, and then he'd/she'd/they'd try and...."
  • "My hetero side just won."
  • "I think it's okay that you're having gay thoughts, just so long as you never act upon them."
  • "Imagine that your brain is made of tiny boxes. Then find the box that's gay and CRUSH IT! Okay?"
  • "Oh no no nonono, I'm not having gay thoughts."
  • "I can see how this is gonna be a lot like Lord of the Rings."
  • "I would do anything for you. I'm your best friend."
  • "Don't forget what you told me. You are awesome!"
  • "When you go to bed at night, do you sometimes feel a power stirring inside you?"
  • "Wow, so the Bible's actually a trilogy? And the Book of Mormon is Return of the Jedi?"
  • "What the fuck is a steak knife?"
  • "I do not want to spend another night hiding under my bed!"
  • "Sal Tlay Ka Siti.."
  • "O-M-Gosh."
  • "I once told a lie when I was twelve and I had a dream I went to Hell."
  • "Africa is nothing like The Lion King!"
  • "To heck with rules."
  • "I'm not your best friend!"
  • "Jesus knew that He had to man up."
  • "So He crawled up on that cross and He stuck it out."
  • "Just like Jesus, I'm growing a pair."
  • "I'm gonna man up all over myself."
  • "And if we want to go there, we just have to follow that white boy!"
  • "Heavenly Father, why do you let bad things happen?"
  • "More to the point, why do you let bad things happen to me?"
Why waste your time, your talents, your means, your influence in following something that will perish and pass away, when you could devote yourselves to a thing that will stand forever? For this Church and kingdom, to which you belong, will abide and continue in time, in eternity, while endless ages roll along, and you with it will become mightier and more powerful; while the things of this world will pass away and perish, and will not abide in nor after the resurrection, saith the Lord our God.
—  President Charles W. Penrose at a general conference memorializing the death of President Joseph F. Smith

jackbauercanfly asked:

Mcpriceley please? :) One of them (Idc who) tries to flirt with the other by doing the bend and snap from legally blonde. The other elders are confused.

((One-shot time! Thanks for the prompt, I had such a fun time writing this! xoxo))

It was about time Kevin Price noticed Connor McKinley.

About gosh darn time.

So Connor was going to do what he did best.

Musical theater the way to Kevin’s heart (with the help of some hip-hugging pants).

Bracing himself for the many rules he was about to break, the flamboyant district leader buttoned up some sparkly pink sweatpants he had sewn from some leftover fabric, testing it’s tightness over his dancer curves in the mirror of him and his mission companion’s bedroom.

He smiled at himself, tousling his feisty red hair from it’s usually contained and neat state. He shook his head, placing his hands on his hips and grinning in pride, “Gosh darn Elder Thomas, if this doesn’t win his heart then what will?”

Elder Poptarts appeared from the poor excuse of a bathroom they shared, and stepped behind his companion and standing on his tiptoes, whispered into his ear, “Go to him.”

“I will!” Elder McKinley squealed, shaking his companion’s shoulders excitedly. He skipped down the corridor as Poptarts watched from the doorway, dabbing at his eyes with a tissue. “All grown up,” the little elder murmured, “My little boy about to seduce his first man.”

Connor slowed his skip to a slow walk as he entered the living room, fading his wide smile into a neutral frown almost.

Every other elder except for Elder Price, who had his nose buried in a three-week-old newspaper his mother had sent him, were caught up in a game of dominos on the floor.

The men in the room all looked to their district leader as he walked in. He cleared his throat and nodded professionally to them, “Elders, continue your game.”

A few of them exchanged the same confused glances, but continued to play dominos, much to the relief of Elder Cunningham who was (as he stated) on a roll.

“Elder… Price,” Elder McKinley changed his tone of voice and he sauntered over to Kevin, who peeked up from his newspaper. “Do you have a mo?”

Kevin knit his eyebrows, baffled, “Scuse me?”

“A moment,” Connor restated, pleased at his musical theater references. He certainly wasn’t going to forget about THIS boy…

Connor stretched his leg across Kevin’s lap nonchalantly. “What is your opinion on my new pants?”

Kevin widened his eyes, gazing down at Connor’s flexible legs, “I… Uh… Wow…”

Connor chuckled, waving him off, “Well I’ll tell you one thing… They’re very easy to move in! Would you like to see a demonstration?”

“Uh, aren’t you demonstrating right now?” Kevin managed to say, motioning to Connor’s outstretched leg, laughing forcefully.

Connor laughed, “Oh Elder Price, you’re so funny! I like that.” He added in a saucier tone, removing his leg (much to Kevin’s dismay, although he would never admit that!).

Connor cleared his throat, running a hand through his spiked hair and turning around so that his ass was almost right in Kevin’s face.

A blush creeped onto the brunette’s face, and he licked his suddenly dry lips. “Uh… Elder…”

The redhead prepared himself and then lowered his flexible upper body before exclaiming, “Bennnnnnd, and snap!”

And doing exactly that.

“Uh, Elder McKinley your-”

A few of the other elders playing dominos on the floor whispered to each other in confusion, and Elder Neely slapped Arnold’s arm and told him to shush as he laughed out loud.

“Bennnnnnnd and SNAP!”

“Elder Mc-”

“Don’t stop me, Elder! I’m trying to focus on the perfect Delta Nu bend and snap!”

Elder Church shook his head threateningly at Kevin, “Don’t ruin it. Enjoy the show for goodness sake.”

“But, his pants split!” The brunette interjected.

Connor was bent over, about to bend and snap again, but shot up as the room went silent at this, a fierce blush painting his cheeks.

He cleared his throat again, untucking his shirt and trying to smooth it over the apparent split in his new pants.

“Well then…” He nodded to Elder Price, swallowing his nerves, “Thank you for your time.”

He walked out of the room, incredibly embarrassed, and Kevin couldn’t help but smile as he left.

“What is it, best friend?” Arnold asked, picking up a domino and tossing it into Kevin’s lap to get his buddy’s attention.

Kevin crossed his arms, grinning madly.

“Elder McKinley is one sexy guy.”

((So there it is! Hope you enjoyed! I absolutely love Legally Blonde, it holds a special place in my heart, as it was the first show I got a named character in. Thank you lots for this prompt, I hope it met your expectations. Also, I added in a Thoroughly modern Millie reference too, cuz hey… Why not? Hope you like it Xoxo))