Oh it seems we are allowed to post our @meowraculouschatnoirzine pieces now! This is titled how many tears did I shed over this boy’s hair haha I had a lot of fun drawing the dorky cat son and I’m grateful for the opportunity to have been able to participate in such a fun zine!
Niiiiight!! It's so rad to see some posts again from you! Is everything okay? Have you been busy? I'm always sad when you don't post as much but I hope you're doing okay!!
… -stares at dating sim sprite folder-
-stares at pen-
heh, but really - i’m okay, and thanks for asking love! been deep in dev for You Might Have A Type, plus got thrown off for at least a week by the holidays;;; i’m just trying to keep the dev under wraps so despite my urges i’m not posting spoilers/more about it. i’m finishing off the sprites today though, so i’m stoked about that! from there it’s plugging it all in and testing routes and dialogue, sooo… fingers crossed it’ll be soon!
… man, it’s weird to think about the fact that a little over two years ago skeleton content wasn’t an everyday part of my life.
So being someone who used to not like or reblog or comment on people’s stories/fics… because I used to be too conscious about my blog aesthetic…
First of all • I apologize to all those writers. You deserved better then and better now for sharing your beautiful stories with all of us.
Second • Best believe I went back later, reread, reblogged, commented and sent messages to those writers.
Third • Don’t be afraid to hit reblog, to add tags, to share their work, to like something. Shout it from the rooftops if you love a piece of work!! It encourages your faves to continue writing! And why not spread the love.
Fourth • If you are shy, send a message to those writers to let them know you liked something they wrote. Even if they don’t respond, like.. why not send the message anyway! If they do, you might make some cool friends like I did.
I might not always get around to reading some of the stories I’m tagged in, but please know I’m so proud of all the writers out there and so thankful for your vulnerability in sharing your work.
It’s easy to get discouraged when fics don’t get notes or feedback. We’ve lost a lot of good writers due to lack of feedback on their work. You’ve seen writers begging you to leave feedback, PLEASE DO IT!
Oh and lastly, please remember your faves are also human and have their lives to live. Of course we’d love to get story after story from them, chapter after chapter. But please be patient and stay encouraging.
All right. Rant over.
Quick shoutouts to some of my faves and some of the new authors I’ve discovered:
how do balance freetime, managing this studyblr, and school? what does your schedule look like if your constant, if you don't mind me asking?
Ahahaha, it’s a bit of a challenge actually! I’m going to answer this question specifically about me, rather than answering too much about how to time manage - if you want that, then send me another ask :)
There’s a fine line between being on top of things and being behind, so I guess I just try little things to save time? I think a lot of people tend to underestimate the amount of time you need to invest in studying to get good results.
A picture says a thousand words so here’s what this week looked like. As you can see, gray is for unavoidable errands. I only have the times marked in bright blue available for actual studying. Clinic also runs overtime regularly and can sometime cut into lunch. I don’t get a break for dinner on Thursdays because of clinic, so I’m packing some Up and Gos for tomorrow lol
Things I do to try and turn some of those gray areas into bright blue study areas are:
I try to answer inbox questions on the bus,
I try and do patient logbooks on the train rides, and
I cut out my extraneous hobbies like watching drama episodes once university starts. I still have some things that I like doing day to day to relax a bit, like browsing tumblr and knetizen comments which I do when I’m eating breakfast and lunch
Saturdays I take sort of like a weekly break (for the sake of my sanity) where I do more lengthy leisure things I’ve been unable to do, and errands/chores like cleaning, vacuuming and ironing. Sometimes I’ll study instead depending on the workload from uni. If I really need to study for something, I’ll usually reduce the chores that I do.
Sunday I pretty much just study after I get errands done, so I get anywhere from 6 to 12 hours of university work in.
I always try and do work during any break at uni that’s longer than 1 hour. A lot of people really could stand to get some of their uni work out of the way during this time, but instead they’ll have 2-3 hour blocks where they just talk to someone or do some online shopping.
Getting work done is important and so is taking breaks and sleeping enough. It’s been really exhausting this past week and a half though because as you can see I often get home around 8pm or later, meaning only 1-2 hours to study after dinner and a shower, and that’s if I sleep at 11pm-12am ㅠㅠ I also have to wake up at 6am sharp every morning, get to Central station at 8am so that I can get to university at 9am ㅠㅠ
So yeah, it’s hard to balance at this point in time because I have so many clinics, but after these two weeks I do have a break from one of the clinics, so I get Tuesday morning off. ‘
Time management is all about squeezing things in during downtimes like bus and train rides so that you have more time to study/pursue other hobbies if you so wish.
Could you maybe make headcanons for RFA + V and Saeran dealing w/ MC who is overly stressed out from school? ^^" Like... it's an overwhelming amount of hard work that makes her break down sometimes? Thanks so much! <3
The life of a student is not easy. If you’re struggling with classes please know you’re amazing and I’m rooting for you! You can DO IT! ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ)
He can relate more than anyone
Takes over all of the housework and cooking so all you need to focus on is your studies
Will not go to bed without you
So when you stay up late to get homework done he either puts a movie on and sits with you or plays LOLOL at the desk by you so you’re not alone
Super concerned when you have breakdowns
“MC just tell me what I need to do, anything you need please let me know!”
Really dislikes seeing you distraught
Plus he wants to spend time with you when he’s actually home and he can’t because you’re buried in work
“I know you, MC. You’re not an unbalanced person. So the fact that you’re struggling must be your professors fault. They clearly don’t know how to create a syllabus. I’m going to send an email right now and-”
“J U M I N NO!”
Massages your feet and back while you study to help relieve the stress
This poor guy can’t relate and wishes he could do more to save your sanity
One of the worst parts for him is that you have to stay up late and
1) he thinks sleep is so important for your health and skin and
2) he relies on his looks a lot so he has to go to bed at a decent time without you
Honestly just a huge cheerleader for you
Orders food from your favorite takeout places to cheer you up
Makes and brings you drinks while you work
Constantly telling you how amazing you are
“I know its so hard right now, MC. But you’re the smartest and greatest person I know, and you can make it through anything!”
Stress queen baehee to the rescue
She takes a few minutes to look over your schedule and work load when you reach that tipping point
Organizes your stuff from least to most important and what will take the most time
Schedules your breaks for you
Literally just manages that shit like a boss and makes your life so much easier omg
Then brews you both a cup of delicious coffee
This kid is the king of studying/cramming
Plus he’s hecka intelligent and went to an ivy league school
So when he sees you stressin’ he jumps in
Sometimes he just ends up bugging you tbh
Looks over your stuff like the nosy tomato he is
“This answer you wrote here is wrong, MC.” “This is your assignment? Your professor is kind of an idiot, aren’t they.”
“If you’re not going to help then get out, please.” -_-
Honestly just relieves the stress in the best way he knows how, by making you laugh
One time dressed up as a professor
Came in the room where you were hunched over your books
“Time to teach you a lesson, MC.”
You were partially annoyed because you had a lot of work to do but who could turn down a little naughty time?
But he took the role very seriously and ended up just lecturing you and legitimately trying to tutor you on your homework
He’s a mess right along with you!
Super sensitive to your mental state given She-Who-Will-Not-Be-Named
So hes constantly checking up on you
Asking how you’re feeling
Making you take breaks
He understands that you have to get your work done, but he will not let you stay up past midnight, your rest is too important
If it’s been a particularly hard day he has a bubble bath waiting for you before bed and a nice glass of champagne (if you drink)
He is constantly holding you while you study
His favorite is when your back is to his chest on the couch in the living room
He watched TV while you work and stays up as late as you need
Runs his fingers through your hair
Random kisses all night
Rests his chin on the top of your head
If you’re swamped with “busy work” he will force you to let him take some of the load off of your shoulders (if it’s something he can do)
He may not have had the same schooling as Saeyoung but he is still incredibly smart and wants to help you in any way he can
The post I made suggesting this got a lot of positive feedback, so here I go!
Please keep in mind that these are my personal favorites, some will have my personal opinions attached, and some won’t. I probably won’t do more than 10 in a weekly post, just to keep my sanity intact. ;)
Chaptered fics will probably be repeated more than once, if I like the latest chapter update, just so you know! If you guys are interested in my favorite fics of this week, they’re under the cut! Please feel free to PM me at @isakbeanie if you wanna discuss any of these fics!!
An interesting piece of trivia I’d like to offer to you all before starting this review is that this show officially premiered nine days after my nineteenth birthday. And when I think of September, the first thing that comes to mind is how much I enjoy doing September in Review and how long it took for me to figure out whether or not I wanted to squeeze Mabel into it.
But the siren’s call of horror has been a strong one this month, and I was compelled to go with my instincts on the SABLE and Mabel match up for the end of spring. Also, I like rhyming as much as I love perfect timing.
hey if i even get a wiff that you’re stealing something from me/mabel be it writing, headcanons, or aesthetics, i’m immediately going to soft block you. I don’t want to talk to you. I want you to never be near my blog again. And that’s that.
[Spoilers for the Kdrama up through episode 18. This is super long, and I’m not going to bother breaking it down into two parts. Frankly, I had a hard time writing this as it was, and a lot of the rhetoric surrounding SH:R anymore is bumming me out. I just want to watch my show, feel sad, and enjoy the glorious tragedy. But going through the tags this week, I was so grouchy I almost didn’t post at all. Hopefully some of you get something out of this. I love all my followers so much, thanks for sticking it out.]
While for my own sanity it might have
made more sense to do two separate reviews for episode 16 and
episodes 17-18, I’m glad I decided to wait. While I was struggling trying to figure out where the show was going to turn based on episode 16 alone, this week created a much clearer picture of what all this was building to.
As hard as I tried to convince myself it wasn’t inevitable, Eun’s death really brought about a change in our main characters like nothing else could have. Like Lady Oh’s death was a seminal event in Soo’s life, Eun’s was crucial and necessary to push So over the edge toward his pursuit of the throne. It was precisely the crisis we needed to resolve the last ambiguity between So and Soo and propel the final arc.
So’s character development has been
causing me a growing uneasiness since episode 11. I began to wonder
if the writer had perhaps decided to sand away all his wonderful
jagged edges, lighten up all his darker grays, and cast him as a
basically selfless, heroic and deeply misunderstood soul painted as a
tyrant by the caprice of history. I worried especially after Eun’s
death scene if perhaps all of Wang So’s actions and brutal reputation would
be absolved by circumstances. But this week quickly assured me that I
needn’t have worried.
So is every bit the ambiguous villain I always
knew him to be, for a time soften by love, but never really changed.
Not at his heart. It’s exactly as Lady Oh, the oracle of SH:R, once stated: People don’t change for other people.
All those arguments that Wang So was
wildly out of character this week with his treatment of Soo, the
execution of Chae Ryung, and even his conduct toward Jung and his
mother…I tend dismiss out of hand. My reading of So has been the
same for weeks now. Nothing he’s done is inconsistent with his
characterization thus far, and if you’ve been reading my reviews
since the beginning you know I’ve always interpreted him this way:
To This Day
When I was a kid
I used to think that pork chops and karate chops
were the same thing
I thought they were both pork chops
and because my grandmother thought it was cute
and because they were my favourite
she let me keep doing it
not really a big deal
before I realized fat kids are not designed to climb trees
I fell out of a tree
and bruised the right side of my body
I didn’t want to tell my grandmother about it
because I was afraid I’d get in trouble
for playing somewhere that I shouldn’t have been
a few days later the gym teacher noticed the bruise
and I got sent to the principal’s office
from there I was sent to another small room
with a really nice lady
who asked me all kinds of questions
about my life at home
I saw no reason to lie
as far as I was concerned
life was pretty good
I told her “whenever I’m sad
my grandmother gives me karate chops”
this led to a full scale investigation
and I was removed from the house for three days
until they finally decided to ask how I got the bruises
news of this silly little story quickly spread through the school
and I earned my first nickname
to this day
I hate pork chops
I’m not the only kid
who grew up this way
surrounded by people who used to say
that rhyme about sticks and stones
as if broken bones
hurt more than the names we got called
and we got called them all
so we grew up believing no one
would ever fall in love with us
that we’d be lonely forever
that we’d never meet someone
to make us feel like the sun
was something they built for us
in their tool shed
so broken heart strings bled the blues
as we tried to empty ourselves
so we would feel nothing
don’t tell me that hurts less than a broken bone
that an ingrown life
is something surgeons can cut away
that there’s no way for it to metastasize
she was eight years old
our first day of grade three
when she got called ugly
we both got moved to the back of the class
so we would stop get bombarded by spit balls
but the school halls were a battleground
where we found ourselves outnumbered day after wretched day
we used to stay inside for recess
because outside was worse
outside we’d have to rehearse running away
or learn to stay still like statues giving no clues that we were there
in grade five they taped a sign to her desk
that read beware of dog
to this day
despite a loving husband
she doesn’t think she’s beautiful
because of a birthmark
that takes up a little less than half of her face
kids used to say she looks like a wrong answer
that someone tried to erase
but couldn’t quite get the job done
and they’ll never understand
that she’s raising two kids
whose definition of beauty
begins with the word mom
because they see her heart
before they see her skin
that she’s only ever always been amazing
was a broken branch
grafted onto a different family tree
but not because his parents opted for a different destiny
he was three when he became a mixed drink
of one part left alone
and two parts tragedy
started therapy in 8th grade
had a personality made up of tests and pills
lived like the uphills were mountains
and the downhills were cliffs
four fifths suicidal
a tidal wave of anti depressants
and an adolescence of being called popper
one part because of the pills
and ninety nine parts because of the cruelty
he tried to kill himself in grade ten
when a kid who still had his mom and dad
had the audacity to tell him “get over it” as if depression
is something that can be remedied
by any of the contents found in a first aid kit
to this day
he is a stick on TNT lit from both ends
could describe to you in detail the way the sky bends
in the moments before it’s about to fall
and despite an army of friends
who all call him an inspiration
he remains a conversation piece between people
who can’t understand
sometimes becoming drug free
has less to do with addiction
and more to do with sanity
we weren’t the only kids who grew up this way
to this day
kids are still being called names
the classics were
seems like each school has an arsenal of names
getting updated every year
and if a kid breaks in a school
and no one around chooses to hear
do they make a sound?
are they just the background noise
of a soundtrack stuck on repeat
when people say things like
kids can be cruel?
every school was a big top circus tent
and the pecking order went
from acrobats to lion tamers
from clowns to carnies
all of these were miles ahead of who we were
we were freaks
lobster claw boys and bearded ladies
juggling depression and loneliness playing solitaire spin the bottle
trying to kiss the wounded parts of ourselves and heal
but at night
while the others slept
we kept walking the tightrope
it was practice
some of us fell
but I want to tell them
that all of this shit
is just debris
leftover when we finally decide to smash all the things we thought
we used to be
and if you can’t see anything beautiful about yourself
get a better mirror
look a little closer
stare a little longer
because there’s something inside you
that made you keep trying
despite everyone who told you to quit
you built a cast around your broken heart
and signed it yourself
you signed it
“they were wrong”
because maybe you didn’t belong to a group or a click
maybe they decided to pick you last for basketball or everything
maybe you used to bring bruises and broken teeth
to show and tell but never told
because how can you hold your ground
if everyone around you wants to bury you beneath it
you have to believe that they were wrong
they have to be wrong
why else would we still be here?
we grew up learning to cheer on the underdog
because we see ourselves in them
we stem from a root planted in the belief
that we are not what we were called we are not abandoned cars stalled out and sitting empty on a highway
and if in some way we are
we only got out to walk and get gas
we are graduating members from the class of
fuck off we made it
not the faded echoes of voices crying out
names will never hurt me
but our lives will only ever always
continue to be
a balancing act
that has less to do with pain
and more to do with beauty.
With blind!Dean and waiter!Cas, a little bit of humor, and a lot of fluff.
The groan of
misery that wrestled its way past Castiel’s lips couldn’t be contained, no
matter how hard he’d been trying to remain professional.
in the morning, and just as the restaurant was about to finally close, of
course there was one last group of customers. Normally, Castiel didn’t mind;
until he could find someone willing to publish his book, his job as a waiter
would have to pay the bills. Long days meant more money, nothing wrong with
as it was past midnight and he’d been on his feet for nearly fourteen hours, he
inwardly cursed the family of four, now making themselves at home in one of the
booths in the back. Just his luck.
“Put on a
smile, Castiel.” Castiel cringed when his manager, Naomi, briskly tapped his
shoulder. “We want these nice people to enjoy their meal and visit again.”
they did. Castiel forced a smile as he grabbed some of the menus from the
counter. He could do this. One more hour, he could make it.
the family with a polite “welcome to ‘Taste
of Heaven’, how are you doing this evening”, then began to hand out the
menus. Two for the blonde lady and the dark haired man on the left, clearly a
couple, both in their late forties. Two for the boys on the other side of the
booth, probably their sons, judging by the way they were bickering like
brothers would. One of the boys had shaggy brown hair and looked to be a bit
younger than Castiel, eighteen or nineteen perhaps. The other boy -the one with
the handsome face and the freckles- appeared to be around Castiel’s age, either
in his final year of college, or already graduated like Castiel had last year.
hindsight, Castiel could’ve avoided the mistake that he was about to make.
Being naturally observant, Castiel should’ve noted the dark sunglasses that the
older boy was wearing even though it was one in the morning and they were
inside. Not to mention the white cane resting in the corner of the booth.
the average zombie at the end of an endless apocalypse, Castiel handed the menus
to the boys on autopilot. And that’s when his brain caught up, entirely too late.
When the older
boy spoke, tone dead serious but not unfriendly, Castiel prayed for the ugly
tiled floor to swallow him whole. “Ah… thank
you… Yeah, I’ll just… read this.”
moment, Castiel was less than content with himself. Because how could he have
missed this? The boy was blind. Whatever was to blame, whether it was Castiel’s
general exhaustion or a recent lack of sleep, he let out a rather hysterical snort
at his own stupid error.
“Dean! Don’t be rude.” The blonde woman gently chastised her son, Dean, even though the rest of them
seemed highly amused.
Castiel apologized quickly before all but running away, feeling his
This was awful. Note to self; do not work more hours than your sanity
can handle. Ever again.
Time zones confuse me greatly and while drawing the final realms fanart (which is more quality so it takes more time and sanity) I found out I actually need to do one more before the last one. I don’t have enough energy to draw something good so here you go. I did it. This counts. @chongoblog
All or nothing attitudes are tiring. Like you can bring up police corruption without attacking every officer. You can bring up bad things Israel has done without calling for it to be destroyed or attacking every Jew who doesn't agree with you %100. You can say something's bad without burning down everything in a hundred mile radius. Why as someone left leaning do I end up finding more sanity from people I disagree with on a lot of things? Mad world we live in