more than one gay

anonymous asked:

hello potential gal pals, i'm anna and i'm 15. i love lorde's new album, books, art and writing ^^ im also a lowkey kpop stan which is my dirty little secret. sigh. i'm looking for someone who i'll be able to talk with for more than one day? about stranger things, being gay and stuff? like this and i'll hit you up :)

LGBT artists that bts members have supported/recommended: troye sivan, tinashe, frank ocean, halsey, kehlani, adam lambert, sam smith, cher, years and years, sigur ros, hedi slimane (?), ryan mcginley, ante badzim, themselves,

having one wild straight friend in a gay friend group is so much more fun than having one gay friend in a straight friend group. straight people have nothing to lose. they always have vodka immediately on hand. they’re always down to do dumb shit like skinny-dip in a pond in a graveyard. romanticize the sbf (straight best friend)

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omgcpwomenfest femlash/wlw day

Georgia Martin/Suzanne Bittle based on @des-zimbits Gay Hockey Moms AU

As a writer/artist/what have you, the best advice I’ve ever gotten is: “If you want to avoid stereotypes, have multiple characters and make them different” 

Write more than one gay dude, write more than one nonbinary person, write multiple ace people, have more than one African American have more than one autistic person et cetera.

I’m nervous about making a whole post about this but I’m gonna. I’m just gonna come out and say it.

If you claim that asexual and/or aromantic people are straight, you are perpetuating heteronormative thought.

Now, I know that’s a bold statement but please listen to my thought process behind it. I don’t mean any disrespect. I just want to put into words why I think categorizing persons lacking some kind of attraction as “straight” doesn’t work.

The assumption in our society usually is that someone is 1. comfortable with their body in relationship to physical sex 2. Has a socially acceptable gender that both fits into one of two boxes and lines up with what was perceived at birth and 3. Is sexually, aesthetically, and romantically only attracted to persons in that other box, and not their own, and they have that attraction. They are attracted to people in that other gender category.

This is what we would call heteronormative thought. The assumption that a person you meet is cisgender and straight. But we all know that not everyone is like that. And the whole “straight until proven gay” mentality our society has is not a good way to go about human interaction.

There is more than one thing wrong with the “straight until proven gay” mentality. First of all, it is harmful to gay people. But not just that. It is especially harmful to all of those outside of the “gay” and “straight” boxes. Even as society is becoming more accepting of non heterosexual cisgender persons, it still wants to place them in a binary. Either gay or straight. As usual, persons attracted to more than one gender, persons whose aesthetic, romantic, and sexual attractions do not necessarily line up with each other, and persons lacking one, several, or all types of attractions are left out in the cold.

Saying asexual and aromantic people are straight is like trying to fit a square box into a round hole. It just doesn’t work. And that applies to calling them gay too. That’s like trying to fit a square box into a triangular hole. Its not a circle, but its still not a square.

I think we’re all stuck in a heteronormative mindset in one way or the other. Society has done its darndest to make sure we are. Many gay people see someone that does not fit into their triangular hole, so they assume that persons that do not fit must fit in the circular one. If its not black its white. If its not a rainbow its gray scale. If its not gay its straight.

But see, those of us that lack one or more attractions don’t fit on the neat little gradient you’ve set up. Life doesn’t just slide from red to blue with shades of purple in between, and it is most certainly not just red and blue. There are those of us that are green, yellow, orange, brown, black, or white or any color in between and if you talk in terms of just gay and straight you are leaving out a huge portion of the rainbow.

Life can’t be talked about in terms of this or that. If you get that, then poc who are not of African decent are left out of race discussions, persons who don’t have a binary gender are left out of feminist discussions, and those of us who have an attraction to more than one gender or a lack of attraction are left out of the queer community.

If the LGBTQIA+ community is for everyone that does not fit into the category of persons who are okay with their assigned gender and feel sexual and romantic attraction towards persons of the other binary gender and only people of that other binary gender then well,

Make room for the non triangular boxes. Expect more colors than just blue. If you want to fight heteronormative thought, then accept that asexual and aromantic people are not straight. They are lacking attraction or only feel attraction rarely or in specific circumstances, and there is a whole different life experience attached to that, and it doesn’t line up with a straight one.

I personally think that part of fighting heteronormativity is fighting the assumption that everyone experiences attraction. Not everyone does, and if you do not experience any attraction in one or both categories, then you can’t be attracted to the opposite sex and/or gender both sexually and romantically, and therefore can’t be straight. Assuming you have a binary gender in the first place, which many of us don’t.

So, in conclusion, just because someone isn’t gay doesn’t automatically mean they are straight, and part of fighting heteronormativity is fighting the binary ideas sexuality has fallen into. Thank you for your time.

her name is leo and she’s a witch

I didn’t care.
I didn’t care about the weird stares and gazes people gave us.
I didn’t care about what others might think of us.
I didn’t care about the hurtful critisism people threw.
I didn’t care about the feminism people tell.
And I didn’t care about everything.
I didn’t care because i knew we had each other and nothing could be more greater than that. My one and only.

i know retroactively ascribing highly specific contemporary labels to dead historical figures is unproductive because our sense of language, experience, and identity will always be different from theirs but daphne du maurier was a trans man oh my god