months ago but still

anonymous asked:

Any tips for getting over an ex. My gf and I broke up a couple of months ago but I still have feelings for her and I can't seem to move on.

Fling yourself into a fandom with pretty girls

I bought my first doll a few months ago but I still haven’t been able to name her. Its on the tip of my tongue!!! It doesn’t help that I have no doll friends to talk to about this, and the one person I could possibly talk to about dolls ignores me. :( They were so excited for me to get a doll and then when I got her, they didnt give a shit and brushed me away. Im just sad.

~Anonymous

tell the boy on the left thanks for not killing the boy on the right  ✌

Sh*t I’m still working on

- I came out 6 months ago and it’s still hard for me to say the word “lesbian” out loud. When I do come out to someone I use the word “gay” but like I know my aversion to the word is just internalized lesbophobia and misogyny and I don’t want that to affect my word choice? I’m a lesbian and i want to feel 150% comfortable saying the word “lesbian”.

- When I see a sexual lesbian scene (OITNB or The L Word) I instantly feel a cold fist in my stomach and a compulsion to avert my eyes. I still feel guilty about finding any of that stuff attractive.

- A couple of months ago I saw a Tumblr post talking about a new movie about a 9 year old lesbian who has a crush on her friend and my first thought was “Ew, why would they make a movie that sexualizes kids like that?” and then I realized that my knee-jerk reaction was way off. Like there’s nothing wrong or hypersexual about a 9 year old girl holding another 9 year old girl’s hand. But I had spent so many years hiding that part of myself, and buying into the idea that lesbianism is innately bad and dirty and shameful that to see it be the center of a movie freaked me out. But then I thought about it and felt bad for 9 year old lesbian me who had to deal with those feelings of repulsion about herself and couldn’t even admit she was having them… And it made me realize how important movies like that really are…

Representation is so important. The first time I saw a woman show a physical desire to be with another woman was when I was 13 and watching tv with my family and an advertisement for a well-known pervy (geared towards male audiences) DVD franchise came on and of course it featured female college students making out. My dad got so upset he called the tv station to complain. Meanwhile I had a lot of feelings but couldn’t acknowledge any of them… And it made me wish that with all the TV and movies I saw I could have seen just a few gay couples… 9 year old girls holding hands, a 15 year old getting kissed by her girlfriend for the first time, college girlfriends coming up with cute ways to help each other study… just some positive characters I could have looked at and realized “Oh. They’re cute and sweet together. There’s nothing wrong with that. That’s normal. I’m normal.”