monster kris allen


Based On Monster by Kris Allen

Bucky x Reader

Post CW

Did I ever think to tell you that I am a monster?
You have never seen this side of me
Maybe I should wear a warning that says that there’s danger
If you ever get too close to me
I’ve been telling you to run away
But you say you’re not scared
But when I break your heart some day
Girl you need to be prepared

James Buchannan ‘Bucky’ Barnes was free. After months and months of rehab, and therapy with the help of Wanda Maximoff, he was free. The nightmares had stopped, and he was able to finally breathe. He almost felt like himself, the person he had been trying to be and figure out after everything that had happened.

That’s when he met you. You had been recruited to the Avengers after being taken into their custody because they thought you were the bad guy, when in reality, you had just saved an entire city block from a bomb. Apparently, a new story made it look like you were the bomber and after a lot of talking, SHIELD realized what you had done and offered you a job. For the past several months you had been back and forth with training to control you powers, and being sent on small missions.

Tony had been the one that heard about your powers. You were able to absorb the energy from those around you and either use them for a few minutes or dispel the energy of the object or individual. He decided you would be a good addition to the team and you jumped at the offer to be considered a real superhero, an avenger in fact.

You moved into the tower a week later and everyone welcomed you with open arms. You immediately bonded with Natasha and Wanda, and the boys all treated you like their little sister, well, all the boys except James Barnes. The moment you had walked through the door, Bucky knew he wanted, no he needed to know you. You were perfect in his eyes, and for once he felt like he could put on the same charm he had in the 40’s and use them on you.

It was after dinner a few nights after you had moved in, and you were wandering around the tower, lost. Although Tony had given you had given you a tour, the place was huge and you were still adjusting.

“Hey (Y/N) are you lost?” a voice called out to you.
You turned around to see Bucky leaning against the wall at the end of the hallway. His t shirt fit him loosely and a pair of exercise shorts hung on his hips. He looked like he was headed to the gym, which was exactly where you were trying to go as well.

“Yeah I am actually. I was trying to find the gym, but this place doesn’t exactly have maps on the walls,” you said with a smile.

“Follow me, I was heading their too,” he said, and you gladly obliged.

Working out with Bucky was the most fun you had while training in a while. Although at first you two talked very little, but the end of the workout, you were both teasing each other and trying to push one another. After working out together a couple times, it began to turn into a routine. Working out together soon turned into hanging out, and having movie nights or just being around each other.

Then one night after everyone had gone to their rooms for the night, you and Bucky were cuddled up with each other on the couch, after finishing another season of Grey’s Anatomy. You had been yelling at the characters to just get together already, and Bucky was trying to contain his laughter at your comments.

“They are obviously in love with each other, and everyone can tell, but they just won’t get together and it’s so annoying,” you groaned and laid on Bucky’s lap.

“You’re adorable, but they can’t hear you doll,” he said with a laugh.

“I don’t care, it makes me feel better.” You said with a huff.

“(Y/N) I think I know something that would make you feel better than yelling at the TV,” he said, looking shy all of a sudden.

“Well what is it?” you asked, knowing or at least hoping you knew where this was going.

Without another moment’s hesitation, he leaned down slowly and kissed you, softly. You reached up and wrapped your hand around the back of his neck pulling him into a deeper kiss. Your lips moved together, fitting perfectly. After who knows how long, you both pulled back.

“That definitely made me feel better than yelling at the TV,” you replied, with a smile.

From that point on, you and Bucky were a couple. He felt like he was the luckiest man in the world. He was free from his past, and he felt like he had the perfect girl to be by his side. You were glad to have him, because you knew he was yours and yours only. You knew he would never let anything or anyone hurt you.

Your perfect world couldn’t last forever. It was a mission, a simple mission to collect information from one of the last known Hydra bases. The mission turned out to be more complicated than you had imagined, and you and Bucky ended up being separated. You were cornered and even with all your training and powers, you couldn’t save yourself. You were captured.

Bucky was beyond pissed. He had to be practically dragged back to the tower by both Steve and Clint. He wanted to take off to find you, to rip every single Hydra agent apart until he was able to bring you home. He needed to get you back, to save you, to bring you home.

It was 10 days since you had been taken before the team got a hit on where you might me. Bucky was the first one suited and was about ready to fly out on his own. Tony was about ready to lock down the tower if Bucky was really going to take off.

You felt like you were dying. Being locked behind bars, being prodded and cut apart was unbearable. They always knocked you out before they did anything, so you couldn’t absorb any of their energy. You waited anxiously, planning an escape and also hoping that your teammates would find you soon. After being locked up for what you guessed was a little over a week, you heard gunshots from above the compound. You stood up and rushed to the front of your cell. Guards were gathering around the room, weapons ready to take out anyone who had come in. Then the door burst open, and everything was chaos. You saw Bucky, but it wasn’t your Bucky anymore.

The look in his eyes, you hadn’t seen him ever look that way before. He looked like a monster and for once you were scared. You knew what he was before, but he hadn’t ever been that way around you. He had never even told you much about what he had been through because he said it was in his past. But now, he was here in front of you, not James Barnes, no this was the Winter Soldier. He was brutal, gunning down, and cutting each and every Hydra agent to pieces. You had never been scared of him, until this moment. You backed into the corner of your cell, waiting until it was over.

He pulled the knife from the last guy on the ground before making his way over to you. You were pressed against the wall, as he ripped open the door to the cell. His eyes changed, from a cruel being to the man you knew, and now he was the one that looked scared.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry you had to see that,” he said softly.

“You never told me. I didn’t know, but I did know what you were,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

“I thought it was better if I didn’t. You’re scared of me aren’t you?” he asked. You didn’t even know what to say. The adrenaline of being rescued was leaving you and your body was beginning to feel weak again. You began to sway on your feet. Bucky was at your side in an instant, taking you in his arms and taking you away. You were out before you walked out of the compound.

“Buck, you have to let her heal,” Steve told him. Bucky hadn’t left your side the past 4 days you were in the hospital. The other avengers had come in and out to visit and check on your progress. Steve was there almost as much as Bucky was, to keep the both of you company.

“She thinks I’m a monster. I thought I was okay. She never saw me like that, but I should have done more. I shouldn’t have let my feelings get the best of me. I should have told her to run away when she had the chance,” Bucky said, his voice tight, as he held your hand.

Steve sighed, not knowing what to say. “Just tell her what you feel. That’s the best I can say.” With that he left the room.

About an hour later you started to wake up, the smell was the first thing that hit you. The strong smell of hospital cleaner, and medicine always bothered you. You slowly opened your eyes as the bright lights blinded you momentarily. You turned you head slowly to see Bucky, his head rested against the hospital bed. You smiled and reached to brush his hair back from his face. You small action caused him to stir awake.

He smiled for a moment before his face turning serious. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so, sorry (Y/N).”

“You saved me,” you responded, your voice raspy.

“I never wanted you to see that, to see me like that.”

“I don’t care. You know why I don’t care?” you asked him.

“Why?” he questioned, his brows furrowed in confusion.

“Because you are in control and you saved me.” His face was still serious, but it slowly softened and he looked calm. He reached for your hand and gave it a soft kiss. You smiled at his gentle gestures.

“I love you,” he said, holding you hand to his cheek.

“I love you too, more than you could ever imagine.”