Billy Roy Hodstetter takes a stab at playing “Different Drum”

I just wanted to say that I’m taking a step back from the Monkees fandom because there’s only so far someone can be pushed and I’m really upset about how things have unfolded. If you’re only following me for Monkees stuff then I’m really sorry for letting you down but while I’ll still be here I can’t contribute anything right now. I have been made to feel horrible and worthless, bashed by someone I had never had a crossed word with who I’m pretty sure has been trolling me for months, and once again the silence from many has been so upsetting to the point where I really don’t think I can be a part of this anymore. It’s not what it used to be here and I’m so sorry to the people who do have my back for letting you down but this isn’t the fandom that I got involved in. I hope my feelings will change at some point but right now I feel hurt and worthless and i feel like everything I’ve ever worked for for this blog has been for nothing. I know I said that anon hate doesn’t hurt me and it never has, not too much anyway, but what happened last night wasn’t an anon, it was someone I know within the fandom who took it upon themselves to patronise me and then insult me, completely unprovoked, and it has been the final straw for me. I can’t deal with this anymore and it makes me sadder than any of you probably realise.

I’ll still be here but Im not going to contribute anything to the Monkees fandom for the foreseeable. I’m really sorry but the passion has gone. I know this probably sounds so dramatic and it probably is. If I’ve ever said that I don’t care what people think then that was a lie because my problem is I care too much. I care too much about what all of you think and that has left me open to be let down because I’m an idiot who needs too much and feels like crap when I don’t get it.

I’m not going to keep boring you with this sort of stuff. It’s not the first time I’ve expressed feelings like this, but last night *was* actually the first time I’ve been harassed by someone I know/cared about, so I’m at a point where I’ve got nothing else left to give.

Thank you @beeeatle @callingnightbird @littlehorrorshop @averyextraordinaryscene for sending me nice messages and of course Meg and Jess for listening to me moan all day. This isn’t a reflection on you guys at all, but the Monkees fandom here doesn’t feel like a fun safe place for me anymore.