RACINE, WI—Concerned that you might be upset if she were to get rid of it without permission, your mother reportedly called Wednesday to ask if she could throw away your three-ring binder from middle school. “Hi honey, I just wanted to check in and see if I can throw out this binder I found when I was cleaning out your closet, the one with the dark blue cover and your name written in marker on the back,” said your mom, describing the plastic organizer containing seventh-grade science and math notes that had sat unused in a cardboard box for over 15 years. “It has a lot of papers in it, so I figured you might still want it. Just let me know and I can send it to you.” At press time, despite having your consent to dispose of the binder, your mother said she’d just hold onto it so you could decide what to do with it next time you visit.
Anyone else slightly concerned the Onion has it out for geoscience this week?