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I have been called many things
most of them whispered in the back of my own mind
hurting even more than they would if spoken by a stranger
but the worst thing I have ever been called came from the mouth of one of my old “friends”
“Why are you such a pessimist?”
the one thing that I cannot stand to be called out of her lips with no apology. I suppose to most people its not such a bad thing, just a state of mind.
Pessimist: a state of mind in which one anticipates undesirable outcomes or believes that the evil or hardships in life outweigh the good or luxuries.
I do not anticipate the undesirable, the undesirable grabs me in the middle of the night when I am half asleep whispering prophecies of all that will soon be lost. I do not believe that the evil or hardships in life outweigh the good or luxuries. I have had luxuries in my life and I hold them each up to myself and feel lucky that they have come and gone. But life itself is not good, we have to fight for every happy memory everything worth remembering must be earned and so I am not a pessimist I am a realist and I pity and envy that friend who will live her life with flowers in her hair and bunnies around her feet and I will laugh when the flowers wilt and the green grass around her feet dries up and leaves her standing in the cold winter air.
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I am not a pessimist

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