miss cj

| Iwaoi | oneshot | au | read on ao3

And it’s for my heart that I’ll live

Down the hall the vending machine hums, mixing with the muffled voices of the nurses and their shuffled steps on dull linoleum. Sparse fluorescent lights illuminate the corridor in a dim gloom. Everything seems distant and lost in reverie.
An odd atmosphere in contrast to Tooru, running on thin nerves and cheap hospital coffee for two days now. The empty coffee cup in his hands is long useless. Turned and switched between restless fingers until the thin plastic budged and snapped.

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Sherlock yawned.

His eyes opened slowly and revealed a sleeping John Watson lying next to him. His mouth opened slightly and short bursts of his breath on his face. Sherlock smiled and thought about last night. How John laid awake with him for hours before his crying finally stopped and he fell asleep. He kicked himself, he was displaying a gross expression of emotion yesterday. He threw logic out the window and filled his head with sentiment and he’s ashamed to think of how John saw him crying over the sink full of dishes because he wasn’t talking to him. Sherlock told himself in that moment that he shouldn’t cry because this wasn’t new to him. He knew the day would come when John would finally decide that he wasn’t worth his time, that he could find somebody better than him. He braced himself for the news, and it hurt him to think that he wasn’t enough for John when John was the whole world to him. He nearly made it without crying, but then he looked at John, who was so close to him, drying the dishes and he couldn’t help himself. When John kissed him, and told him that he loved him, he still cried, but it was because the man of his dreams told him, the most obnoxious, rude, and unpleasant man that anyone could have the misfortune to meet, that he loved him.

The only other time Sherlock had been this happy was when John agreed to move in with him.

The only time Sherlock can say that he’s been happy is only when John is around. The love of his life, his blogger, his doctor…

“John Watson.” He breathed. Said man pawed his face and shuffled closer to Sherlock. Sherlock was sitting up; John’s arms were wrapped around his waist and his head was resting on Sherlock’s stomach. He smiled and rested a hand on John’s back, raking his free hand through the soft blond hair. He had to admit, John’s new hair was very fitting for him, he was always handsome to Sherlock. John let out a soft groan at Sherlock’s head massage and held him even tighter.

“Don’t stop.” John spoke, still half-sleep. Sherlock chuckled. “I have no intention to.”

Sherlock heard John yawn. He raised his head to look at Sherlock. His eyes were still glassy from sleep, and his smile lopsided but so warm and compassionate that Sherlock thought he would cry all over again.

“Do you know that you look quite stunning when you wake up?” John laughed at the question and rolled his eyes. They didn’t say anything after that, John moved to rest his head on Sherlock’s chest, and closed his eyes from the pleasure Sherlock’s massage was giving him.

“You kissed me last night. Well, we kissed for a second time.”

“Yes, I remember.” The conversation trailed off for a bit before John asked, “Why?”

Sherlock’s hands clutched to John’s hair at the question.

“I…I was…I wanted to know if we could, quite possibly, make it a third time?”

John’s laugh came out as a breath. He opened his eyes and sat up to Sherlock’s level.

“Yeah, Sherlock, we can make it a third time, and a fourth time, we can kiss as many times as we want.”

Sherlock felt the blush rising in his cheeks as he thought about all the future kisses they would share. All the days and nights he would fall asleep and wake up in John’s arms. He was so excited to finally be with John, and not just as best friends or flat mates or even as bedmates. He was allowed be in love with John and shower him adoration and affection that the soldier needed desperately. He hummed.

“Let’s make it a third time and see if it is enough.” Sherlock’s lips were already starting to pucker. John’s pressed against his and Sherlock moaned at the joy of being able to do this. John’s mouth spread into a smile, still pressed against Sherlock’s, and he was laughing. Sherlock joined him, the two still nose-to-nose with each other, grinning in the other’s face.

“Was that enough?” John’s voice lowered, making Sherlock’s smile widen to its limits.

“It was enough, John. You’re enough for me.” They both shared a few more kisses until they heard Rosie’s cries from down the hall.

“The day awaits us, love.” John threw his blankets off his body and left to tend to his daughter. Sherlock was still in the bed, fingers lightly caressing his lips and in awe. He put his hand down and whispered, “Love?”

He couldn’t help but smile to himself.


So yes, the next few chapters will include domestic johnlock, so that I can show their gentle transition into finally being together. 

@sappylock @vitruvianwatson @fortheloveofjawn @justsherlythings7 @now–what @bronzedviolets @aconsultinghobbitinthetardis @deathfrisbee-221b @the-john-to-your-sherlock @johnandsherlocks @willasherlyscottholmes @toooldforthissh–stuff @random-nexus @the-three-garridebs @akablue24 @worthless-dude @angel-loving-star @beekeepers-in-love @jubalya @im-batt-mellamy @imworkingonit86 @buckynotbuchanan @certaincollectiontravelerlove @teeeffdee @mycroftpotter @purplejayee @funkychickzz @wellthengameover @superspringles @gimmeastartoreachfor @orphengesic-tab @froggie95 @enchanted-captainswan @sirarthurcanondoyle @watsonsanatomy @loveismyrevolution @missmuffin221 @chulia25 @jazziejexbird @ink-in-murder @thegameisgay @usuallynotusual @sspectacularlyignorant @theelephantin221b @masterofhounds @fallingoffbarts @sherlock-totally-loves-john @shayspieterse @loveteaelephants @tealfox-10-24 @cow-mow @vaticancameos-andtea @reallyimpossibleartisan @lets-play-muuurder @deathishauntedbyhumans @sairyn-noc @wholockian16 @221beestings @real-life-reichenbach @ttennis1121 @treacherous-siren @frozenrendezvous @beardchr @deliriouslylazyafternoons @hushwatson @fuck-off-watson @chinike @jael3333 @wilde-grrrl @pepperminotaur @castiel-is-not-a-god @bisexualowl @simpleanddestructivechemistry @daisyfairy1 @miss-phanatic @cj-holmes @escaroles @bleedingverses @morgendaemmerung89 @bvil23 @gobacktobakerstreet @wingedpurplewords @aznaks @johnlock-reality @clueless-kait @katthepotato @heartsherlocked @anglophilean @johnlockissquishy @there-is-no-inbetween @busybiscute @whereisjawn @mrsfleurytatro @august-emerald

Annnnnd that’s everyone! 

please reblog/reply/like! 


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He called me love.

And that seemed to be the one word that Sherlock heard after their morning together. When he finally joined John in Rosie’s room, the blond already had the baby laid out on the changing table. Her diaper was just removed. John looked up at Sherlock and smiled. He reached his hand toward the baby’s items and said, “Could you get me a wipe and nappy, love?”

There it was again. John called him that word. He called him love. For a moment, he nearly forgot that John asked him to get something. He went and got the items and handed them over to John, then retreated to leaning on the doorway.


Sherlock rested his head on the wood, suddenly feeling drunk with affection for John.

The second time, they were in the living room, Rosie was demolishing her stuffed bee while watching the television. Sherlock was sat on the couch while John fixed them breakfast. John’s specialty was eggs with beans on toast. Sometimes, he would sneak a few slices of ham from Mrs. Hudson while she was away and then cook it for their meal. Sherlock never much cared for breakfast, but with John, he would gladly sit and share a meal. He looked into the kitchen to see his lover standing over the stove humming some tune in his head. Sherlock smirked at how adorable he found the man to be at times. Rosie was tugging at his pant leg, he looked down and saw the blue-eyed baby smiling up at him with her fist in her mouth.

“Oh, did you finally grow bored of mutilating that poor bee?”

He looked over at the once fluffy bee and sighed. It was a gift for her and this was how she treated it. He placed her on his lap and watched the children’s show. He let her grab his ring finger and briefly, Sherlock imagined a gold band on it. He shook his head. John said he loved him, not that he wanted to marry him. For everything that’s happened, John may not be too keen on the thought of remarrying.

“Time to eat, love.” John’s smile made Sherlock dizzy. How could such a mouth show this much emotion?

I am his love

Sherlock looked down at Rosie and whispered, “I am his love, Rosie.” To which the infant just continued to suck on her fist. He seated himself at the table after placing Rosie in her special chair directly in front of the television. John was waiting for him. They shared a glance before digging in. While they ate, Sherlock felt John’s leg brush against his. Maybe it was an accident, Sherlock thought. But then he felt the leg again. He blushed and tried to hide his face from the chuckling man across the table.

“What’s the matter? Do you want me to stop?”

Sherlock reacted faster than he could think and shook his head. John put his fork down and sat back, trying to get a good look at Sherlock’s face. Sherlock resisted every urge he had to look John in his eyes and kept eating.

“You’re gorgeous, you know that?”

Sherlock shrugged cursing his blushing cheeks. “I’ve been told.”

“Oh yeah? By who?”


Sherlock’s smile turned smug when he saw John’s cheeks matching his own. Now they matched. John grinned at him.

The third time was when they took to lounging together on the sofa while Rosie dominated whatever they had on the television. John tried to change to the news for a moment and Rosie started shrieking whenever anything other than the Teletubbies on the screen. So, there they were, stuck watching the Teletubbies. John was indifferent to it, Sherlock, was horrified at how children found such frightening creatures entertaining.

John was lying in between Sherlock’s legs, with his head resting on his chest. Sherlock had his arms wrapped around John’s so that his hands were laying on his chest. John’s hands were rubbing Sherlock’s arms slowly, it was very ticklish.

“Care for tea, love?”

He’s in love with me.

“Yes, I do.”

John got up to fix their cups and Sherlock was left to think about John calling him that word so many times in one day.

That night, they were both in Rosie’s room trying to find ways to coax her to sleep. Sherlock was rubbing her stomach and shushing her, meanwhile John tried to give her warm milk. When she finally fell asleep, they stood over her crib and watched her little chest rise and fall softly. John yawned and said, “Are you ready for bed?”

Sherlock nodded. “Just give me a moment to brush my teeth.”

John rose on his tippy toes to kiss Sherlock’s lips. “I’ll see you in bed, love.”

After John walked out the room, only one thing crossed his mind.

I love him.


There will be plenty more times of John calling Sherlock “love” so don’t worry guys! 

@sappylock @vitruvianwatson @fortheloveofjawn @justsherlythings7 @now–what @im-batt-mellamy @bronzedviolets @aconsultinghobbitinthetardis @deathfrisbee-221b @the-john-to-your-sherlock @the-three-garridebs @akablue24 @worthless-dude @angel-loving-star @beekeepers-in-love @jubalya @imworkingonit86 buckynotbuchanan @johnandsherlocks @teeeffdee @mycroftpotter @purplejayee @funkychickzz @wellthengameover @superspringles @gimmeastartoreachfor @orphengesic-tab @froggie95 @enchanted-captainswan @sirarthurcanondoyle @watsonsanatomy @loveismyrevolution @missmuffin221 @chulia25 @jazziejexbird @ink-in-murder @thegameisgay @usuallynotusual @sspectacularlyignorant @theelephantin221b @masterofhounds @fallingoffbarts @sherlock-totally-loves-john @shayspieterse @loveteaelephants @tealfox-10-24 @cow-mow @vaticancameos-andtea @reallyimpossibleartisan @lets-play-muuurder @deathishauntedbyhumans @sairyn-noc @wholockian16 @221beestings @real-life-reichenbach @ttennis1121 @treacherous-siren @frozenrendezvous @beardchr @deliriouslylazyafternoons @hushwatson @chinike @jael3333 @wilde-grrrl @pepperminotaur @castiel-is-not-a-god @bisexualowl @simpleanddestructivechemistry @miss-phanatic @cj-holmes @escaroles @bleedingverses @bvil23 @gobacktobakerstreet @wingedpurplewords @aznaks @johnlock-reality @clueless-kait @katthepotato @heartsherlocked @johnlockissquishy @there-is-no-inbetween @busybiscute @whereisjawn @mrsfleurytatro @august-emerald @zedkay068 @ordinaryangel @my-sun-my-baelish @morgendaemmerung89 @mishezza @imperfectoreoashley @consultinghubbies @emc-starkid 

Annnnd I think that’s everyone! 


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The first thing John thinks when he rolls over is He’s naked.

Sherlock Holmes was naked in his bed. He was fast asleep, lying on his stomach, bare ass exposed, the sheets only covering one of his legs. The sunlight crept in through the closed curtains. It shone on him and made him look like an angel. His mouth hung open slightly, every other breath was a snore, his curls fell haphazardly on his face. His afterglow was beautiful.

The second thing John thinks is He’s naked, but god is he gorgeous.

Sherlock sighs softly and paws at his face. John looks at his own body. He was naked, but his sheet covered his lower regions. He looked up at the ceiling and smiled. He had never felt that intimate with anyone, sorry Mary. That was more than sex, it was more than lust. They made love last night. It was wonderful and everything John thought it would be. Sherlock’s moans, his whimpers, the way his face looked when he finally came. It was too beautiful for words. John looked back over at the brunet, and rested a hand on his back. His skin was so soft, he worried that if he held him too tight he would bruise. And that arse. Dear god above, what a perfect thing it was. Plump, firm, it made John salivate just thinking about it. He wanted to do more with Sherlock last night, but the poor man had never had sex before and he didn’t want to scare him from the act altogether. That was the thing with Sherlock, you couldn’t rush things, it all had to be slow, it had to progress in stages.

For Sherlock, John would wait forever. His love, his life.

His hand moves to the mess of curls and runs his fingers through them, careful not to wake Sherlock. The man lets out a soft moan and John grins. In all regards he was beautiful.

He wanted nothing more but to lay in bed, watching this man sleep, but the day awaited, Rosie was due to cry at any moment. He had work. He had half a mind to call in sick.

“Love, wake up. Come on Sherlock.”

His eyes fluttered open and immediately his mouth curled into a smile. He whispered, “Good morning.” and kissed John. John moaned into the kiss, he wanted him so bad. He loved him so much. Sherlock pulled away and rested his head on John’s chest, the hair tickling his cheek.

“Good morning my love.”

“I like that word.” Sherlock said, his eyes closed and his hand rubbing John’s stomach.

“What word?”

“Don’t be daft, John, you know what word.”


Sherlock chuckled and shook his head. “No.”

“Then it must be ‘what’.”

“It’s not that either.”

“Well now you must tell me, I’m afraid I’m at a loss.” John was teasing him now.

“Love, John. I like it when you call me love.”  Sherlock’s voice was so gentle, he sounded like a child. John’s breath hitched in his throat.

“Do you? I guess I’ll have to call you that more often, won’t we?”

“Yes, I guess you do.”

Sherlock’s head was close enough that John could kiss it without much effort. He did, and then he stroked it. He looked at his clock. It was time for him to get ready. Rosie started crying.

“Come love, the day awaits us.”

John tapped Sherlock’s shoulder for him to move over so he could sit up. Sherlock laid, one arm propped under his head, watching a very naked John make his way to his closet. Silence fell in the room, but it was comfortable. They were comfortable.

The third thing that John thought was He’s naked, but god he’s gorgeous and I love him.


@sappylock @vitruvianwatson @fortheloveofjawn @justsherlythings7 @now–what @bronzedviolets @aconsultinghobbitinthetardis @deathfrisbee-221b @the-john-to-your-sherlock @johnandsherlocks @willasherlyscottholmes @toooldforthissh–stuff @random-nexus @the-three-garridebs @akablue24 @worthless-dude @angel-loving-star @beekeepers-in-love @jubalya @im-batt-mellamy @imworkingonit86 @buckynotbuchanan @certaincollectiontravelerlove @teeeffdee @mycroftpotter @purplejayee @funkychickzz @wellthengameover @superspringles @gimmeastartoreachfor @orphengesic-tab @froggie95 @enchanted-captainswan @sirarthurcanondoyle @watsonsanatomy @loveismyrevolution @missmuffin221 @chulia25 @jazziejexbird @ink-in-murder @thegameisgay @usuallynotusual @sspectacularlyignorant @theelephantin221b @masterofhounds @fallingoffbarts @sherlock-totally-loves-john @shayspieterse @loveteaelephants @tealfox-10-24 @cow-mow @vaticancameos-andtea @reallyimpossibleartisan @you-lit-me-up @deathishauntedbyhumans @sairyn-noc @wholockian16 @221beestings @real-life-reichenbach @ttennis1121 @treacherous-siren @frozenrendezvous @beardchr @deliriouslylazyafternoons @hushwatson @fuck-off-watson @chinike @jael3333 @wilde-grrrl @pepperminotaur @castiel-is-not-a-god @bisexualowl @simpleanddestructivechemistry @daisyfairy1 @miss-phanatic @cj-holmes @escaroles @bleedingverses @morgendaemmerung89 @bvil23 @gobacktobakerstreet @wingedpurplewords @aznaks @johnlock-reality @clueless-kait @katthepotato @heartsherlocked @anglophilean @johnlockissquishy @there-is-no-inbetween @busybiscute @whereisjawn @mrsfleurytatro @august-emerald @dorvanie @emc-starkid @irrationalmurderer @theaccidentalhero @madcap-but-whatsoever @secretpizzaparadeiser @estelna @my-sun-my-baelish @multivariate-madness @immablogger @johnlockishell @disregardedletters @memeduckgodess @wiscolina 

Please like/reply/reblog! 


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“Tell me again.”

They were all lying in bed. Rosie was happily napping on top of the two men, who were staring up at the ceiling smiling and chatting the day away. John had stared at Sherlock and when prompted by the other, he started to rattle off all the things he loved about him.

“You’re quite full of yourself Mr. Holmes.”

Sherlock scoffed. “Indulge me, John. Please.”

John rolled his eyes and let out an exaggerated sigh. “Oh fine, whatever Sherlock wants, Sherlock gets.”

Sherlock smiled and moved Rosie up so that her face would be buried in the crook of his neck. Her soft breaths tickling at the skin of his neck. John was stroking her hair to help her stay asleep.

“Let’s see, let’s see…I love your hair. I’ve always loved it. I love the way it looks when you wake up. I love the way it looks when you style it, although I don’t appreciate how long you take to do it, love. I adore your curls so very much, Sherlock. I love that they’re on your head, and I love that you wear them so well.”

Sherlock’s face was as red as could possibly be. John laughed, showing all his teeth this time. Sherlock liked the fact that he was so happy. That he finally felt good enough to laugh with him.

“Okay, okay. I love your eyes. I absolutely love your eyes, Sherlock. I love the fact that they’re so expressive on you. Even when you think you’re being this stone-cold detective, your eyes always give you away. They’re so blue, sometimes they’re a mixture of blue and green, they’re absolutely stunning, Sherlock.”

Sherlock rolled over so that Rosie and he were now nose-to-nose so that John wouldn’t see just how much he made him blush. The baby’s breath smelled like the formula she drank an hour ago, and Sherlock pressed a tiny kiss to her button-nose.

“Anything else, John?” Sherlock’s voice was as soft as he could will it, careful not to wake the baby up.

“You know how I feel about you, Sherlock. You know I love being with you, that I love waking up to your face in the morning. You’re so fucking gorgeous, Sherlock. God, I don’t think there’s enough words to help you fully understand how captivated I am with you. Look at me now, I don’t think anyone could ever make me smile like I am now.”

Sherlock propped his head up, his blush lessened so that his cheeks looked relatively normal. His elbow rested underneath his head and his other arm now wrapped around Rosie’s tiny body. He stared at John and yes, it was true that he loved Sherlock like he’s never loved before. But does John truly know the extent of how much John was loved and needed? He waited for the conversation to die away. John hadn’t said anything, and Sherlock was waiting for John to say something. Sherlock closed his eyes and sighed. Oh John…

“Aren’t you going to ask me?”

John’s brows furrowed and he turned to face Sherlock. “Ask you what?”

Sherlock’s mouth hung open. “John! Aren’t you going to ask me what I love about you?”

“Oh. Well, it’s probably a short list.”

“John, I can’t believe you just said that to me.” Sherlock immediately sat up and grabbed Rosie in his arms. He walked off with her and then returned shortly. He laid right next to John and made sure that the man’s eyes were on him.

“John, do you know what I love about you?”

John shook his head. Sherlock’s hands hovered above his face and landed on his cheeks. “I love your cheeks so much, so round and soft. I love your face. You have the face of a soldier, and I don’t just mean because of the army. I hope that when you look into the mirror you see the most handsome man on earth, because that’s how I feel every time I see you.”

Sherlock placed two kisses to both of John’s cheek. He moved to John’s hair and ran his hand through it.

“And this hair. John your hair so perfect to me! So, blond and shiny. You usually wear it like you’re still in the army, but can I tell you now that I really, really love what you’ve done with it recently. You look so handsome, I wish you’d believe me when I tell you.”

Sherlock kissed John’s smiling lips and moved down to his stomach. John watched with careful eyes as Sherlock pulled his shirt up and kissed the pudge. John blushed and threw his hands to his face.

“Christ, Sherlock.”

“John, I know you hate it, I see the way you stare at yourself when you think I’m not watching. John, my conductor of light, love of my life, one of the things I love the most about you is this pudge. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. You’re perfect the way you are. I love the way your shirts show this little softness whenever you tuck them in, or sit down. Do you know how proud I am when I see this?”

“How proud?”

“I am so immensely proud of you, John! When I met you, you were rivaling me in being thin. I see this, as well as your scars, as progress to how far you’ve come. You’re so much stronger than you think you are John. Do not think for a second that you are anything less than perfect to me, do you understand?”

John’s eyes were wide at Sherlock’s words. They were glassy too and that nearly moved the brunet to tears. Sherlock smiled at John’s shock and kissed him on the mouth, he pulled away and saw that John’s mouth was still open. He kissed him again and again until John finally responded. When they pulled away, Sherlock moved to rest his head on John’s stomach when he heard John’s low voice say,

“Tell me again.”  

“Yes, John. I’ll tell you again and again until you understand how dear you are to me.”

When John thought he wasn’t looking, Sherlock spotted the lonely tear roll down his cheek and frown. This man deserved all the love in the world.


@sappylock​ @vitruvianwatson @fortheloveofjawn @justsherlythings7 @now–what @bronzedviolets @aconsultinghobbitinthetardis @deathfrisbee-221b @the-john-to-your-sherlock @johnandsherlocks @willasherlyscottholmes @toooldforthissh–stuff @random-nexus @the-three-garridebs @akablue24 @worthless-dude @angel-loving-star @beekeepers-in-love @jubalya @im-batt-mellamy @imworkingonit86 @buckynotbuchanan @certaincollectiontravelerlove @teeeffdee @mycroftpotter @purplejayee @funkychickzz @wellthengameover @superspringles @gimmeastartoreachfor @orphengesic-tab @froggie95 @enchanted-captainswan @sirarthurcanondoyle @watsonsanatomy @loveismyrevolution @missmuffin221 @chulia25 @jazziejexbird @ink-in-murder @thegameisgay @usuallynotusual @sspectacularlyignorant @theelephantin221b @masterofhounds @fallingoffbarts @sherlock-totally-loves-john @shayspieterse @loveteaelephants @tealfox-10-24 @cow-mow@vaticancameos-andtea @reallyimpossibleartisan @lets-play-muuurder @deathishauntedbyhumans @sairyn-noc @wholockian16 @221beestings @real-life-reichenbach @ttennis1121 @treacherous-siren @frozenrendezvous @beardchr @deliriouslylazyafternoons @hushwatson @fuck-off-watson @chinike @jael3333 @wilde-grrrl @pepperminotaur @castiel-is-not-a-god @bisexualowl @simpleanddestructivechemistry @daisyfairy1 @miss-phanatic @cj-holmes @escaroles @bleedingverses @morgendaemmerung89 @bvil23 @gobacktobakerstreet @wingedpurplewords @aznaks @johnlock-reality @clueless-kait @katthepotato @heartsherlocked @anglophilean @johnlockissquishy @there-is-no-inbetween @busybiscute @whereisjawn @mrsfleurytatro @august-emerald @dorvanie @emc-starkid @irrationalmurderer @theaccidentalhero @madcap-but-whatsoever @secretpizzaparadeiser @estelna @my-sun-my-baelish