mislabelling

I fucking hate it when I’m scrolling through a good blog thinking “hmm might follow this” and then I see that ridiculous post whitesplaining to black Americans that racism is “different” in Europe and that white people can be victims of racism here.

No. We’re not. White people from Poland and Romania and other countries can be victims of xenophobia. People of colour are victims of racism. And racism in the UK looks much like racism in America - we have police brutality against black people, a disproportionate amount of black people in prison, Islamophobic hate crime, lack of POC representation in our media, a disproportionate amount of POCs living in poverty and all the rest of it.

White people are not victims of racism. We can be victims of xenophobic hate crime, xenophobic discrimination and xenophobic legislation but we will never ever be victims of racism.

And you can sit there and shrug and say “meh same difference” but it fucking matters. It matters because white people are responsible for racism whether we like it or not. We all benefit from white privilege and we’re all complicit to varying degrees. When people blur the lines between racism and xenophobia, it leads to the fallacy that anyone can be a victim of racism, which means nobody is really responsible and nobody has any particular obligation to examine their thoughts and actions.

Xenophobia is dangerous and life threatening and oppressive. We don’t have to mislabel it as racism to understand that. Racism and xenophobia have separate histories and separate causes. It’s not difficult to learn the difference.

Alternatives to ‘Sioux’

As you may know, the word ‘Sioux’ is considered to be a slur amongst members of the Oceti Sakowin. It is not our word for ourselves, but rather a name given to us by another nation and perpetuated by the Europeans / Euro-Americans.

You also may have noticed that our official tribe names often contain the word ‘Sioux’ (‘Oglala Lakota Sioux Tribe’ for example.) The reason for this is entirely legal. When our treaties were drafted, they were written as an agreement between the US Government and the ‘Sioux Nation.’ For this reason, we cannot fully abandon the name. However, when we’ve had opportunities, we’ve dropped the name in places we can (’Oglala Lakota County,’ for example, a name chosen by the rezidents.)

Simply put, members of the Oceti Sakowin generally don’t refer to themselves as ‘Sioux’ and, if we can’t change it legally, at least we can continue to assert our identity on our terms. So, if you choose to respect that, here’s a quick Oceti Sakowin education guide:

Oceti Sakowin (Seven Council Fires) 

Oceti Sakowin (encompasses all language dialects) is the simplest and broadest replacement for ‘Sioux.’ You can use this term if you aren’t aware of the specific language group to which ‘Sioux’ refers. Within the Oceti Sakowin are three main groups, which are further divided into seven subgroups:

Isanti Oyate (Santee — Dakota Dialect)

  • Ble Wakantunwan (Mdewakanton*) - Spirit Lake
  • Wahpetunwan (Wahpeton) - Leaf Village
  • Wahpe Kute Tunwan (Wahpekute) - Leaf Archers
  • Sinsin Tunwan (Sisseton) - Swamp Village

Wiciyela Oyate (Yankton/Yanktonais — Dakota Dialect ; commonly mislabeled as Nakota* Dialect)

  • Ihanktunwan - End of Horn Village
  • Ihanktunwanna - Little End of Horn Village

Tinte Oyate (Tetons — Lakota Dialect)

  • Tinte Ta Tunwan (Tintatunwan Oceti Sakowin) - Plains Nation

Within the Tinte Ta Tunwan / Tintatunwan Oceti Sakown (#7), there are another seven subdivisions:

Tintatunwan Oceti Sakowin - Lakota

  • Oglala - Scatters Their Own (Pine Ridge Indian Reservation)
  • Sicangu - Burnt Thighs (Rosebud Reservation, Lower Brule Reservation)
  • Hwohwoju (Mnikiwoju/Mniconjou) - Swamp Plant  (Cheyenne River Reservation)
  • Itazipcola (Itazipco) - No Bow  (Cheyenne River Reservation)
  • Owohe Nunpa (Oohenunpa) - Two Paunch Boiler (Cheyenne River Reservation)
  • Sihasapa - Black Feet (Cheyenne River Reservation, Standing Rock Reservation)
  • Hunkpapa - End of Horn (Standing Rock Reservation)


*modern terminology
*In the past, the term Nakota has been applied to the Yankton, but this is a mistake. The Yankton speak Dakota. Nakota speakers are Assiniboine / Hohe and Stoney, who broke off from the Yankton at a time so long ago their language is now nearly unrecognizable to Lakota and Dakota speakers.

Violet’s List of Modern Witches

(I am not taking credit for this list, I liked it, but it was not alphaitized, which bothered me, so I alphabatized it)
soothingvioletlight:
Artistic Witch: A witch usually covered in paint from head to toe. They draw, paint, dance, sing, and sew their way through their practice. They enchant their tablet pens and paintbrushes, use storm water for their watercolors, and strike real emotion into their audience.

Astro Witch: A witch who works with aliens. Usually very paranoid individuals, they adore star gazing, always know when the next astronomical event is, and love the documentary TV Show ‘ancient aliens’. They are usually adept at astral travel, astrology and sun magick.

Atheist Witch: A witch who does not use deities in their craft.

Blood Witch: Another branch of Chaos magick, these witches primarily use blood in their rituals. They have a high pain tolerance, care little about what others think or say, and are very set in their ways. Many of them have a history of abuse and self harm. Some do it to prove how strong they are or devotion to their deities. Nonetheless, nice people once you get to know them. Perhaps a bit misunderstood.

Catholic Witch: Catholic witch who usually uses saints and the holy trinity in their practice.

Celtic Witch: A witch that mixes their witchcraft with Druidry. They worship the traditional deities of the Celtic people.

Ceremonial Witch: A combination of ceremonial magic and witchcraft. They focus on rituals and formal casting of magic. With robes and altars and everything. Also called Ritualistic Witchcraft or Traditional Witchcraft.

Chaos Witch: A witch who uses baneful magick in their craft. They will sometimes use demons, storm magick, blood magick, and cursing in their practice. They fear nothing. Commonly mislabeled ‘black’ or ‘dark’ witch. Which is not correct. Tsk tsk.

Christian Witch: A witch that holds Christian beliefs and worships the Holy Trinity. They often use the Bible in their work.


Cottage Witch: A Witch who focuses on hearth magick. Much like the Kitchen witch, but with less emphasis on the cooking. They are the homemakers, the ones who decorate the house for the holidays. Usually empaths who are very sensitive to the people around them.
Crystalline Witch: A branch of Green witchery, these witches primarily work with stones, gems, crystals, and rocks. They LOVE geology, spend a lot of time hiking and collecting crystals. Usually very organized individuals that are in tune with the earth. They always know when the next local rock and mineral show is. Usually broke because they are always buying new rocks. So many rocks. Fucking rocks everywhere omg.
Demonic Witch: These witches work with Demons. They differ from Exorcists in that they actually summon them and get them to go their bidding, rather than casting them out. Can usually hold a grudge a hella long time. Not people to mess with. Stubborn and bull headed.
Draconic Witch: These witches are fearsome. They are knowledgable in all the species of dragons, their personalities and their migration patterns. They usually will have one or more dragon companion from their local area. They are skilled in astral projecting, storm magick and cursing. They love to collect things such as books and crystals.
Eclectic Witch: The Boho witch. She uses a combination or mix of whatever paths suit her best. Typically specializes in 2-4 different sects of the craft. She often will wear a mix-match of clothing, but enjoys long flowing things. She tends to be very random and eccentric, but is friendly nonetheless.
Energy Witch: Witches that perform all of their magic internally. Their magic is one of pure energy, using circles cast in their heads and their imaginations to bring their will to life. Are usually shy and keep to themselves. They enjoy divination and astral projection. Also called Intrinsic Witches.
Exorcist: A branch of Spirit Worker. They are usually hereditary, clairvoyant and raised Christian or Catholic or Judaic. They learn their craft as it is passed down from their family members. They practice the archaic tradition of exorcism, aka banishment of dark or foul entities. Very somber individuals, who try their best to be optimistic.
Fae Witch: These witches are educated on all types of faeries, but usually prefer to work with a certain species or one they are familiar with. They are usually very playful and mischievous individuals, mimicking the creatures they work with. They are very attracted to shiny things and are easily offended.
Green Witch: The woodland witches, these earthy individuals protect plants and love to garden. They usually are adept at spirit communication, hearing and responding to the needs of their many leaf-bearing friends. They thrive in natural environments such as forests, lakes, rivers and gardens. Green witches enjoy sunlight, growing plants and collecting rocks. They focus on holistic medicine and are learned healers. They are very familiar with their local region, having memorized all the species of plants, trees, insects, wildlife and flowers. They truly love the earth.

Hedge Witch: A witch that lives between two worlds. They easily cross over into Elsewhere, the astral realm, and do so with ease. Often skilled at working with magickal creatures and familiars, they are very creative and artistic individuals. They are also very adept at psychometry, spirit communication, energy work, and time travel. Also called Astral Witches.
Hellenic Witch: A witch that observes the traditional Hellenic Greek gods and goddesses.
Hereditary Witch: Someone who is born into a witch family and brought up learning about witchcraft, or folk magic. They take great pride in certain traditional magic passed down through the generations.
Judaic Witch: Jewish witch who practices one of the many sects of Judaism. They are proud of their heritage and many enjoy casting their spells in Hebrew.
Kemetic Witch: A witch that practices traditional Egyptian magick and acknowledges and worships Egyptian deities.
Kitchen Witch:  This type of witch uses easily obtained items and weaves magick into every aspect of their life. They are particularly fond of cooking, arts and crafts, sewing, cleaning, gardening and baking. They are skilled in potions, herbology, and subtle magick.
Kreature Witch: Another branch of Green witchery, mixed with spirit working and hedgecraft, these witches primarily work with Magickal and Astral creatures and spirits. They are very friendly people, and get along with all kinds of physical, and not so physical creatures. They collect fossils and bones and skulls and know the names and personalities of each spirit attached to them.
Lunar Witch: A witch who primarily draws their power from the moon. They adore her and are usually adept at making moon water and knowing exactly what phase of the moon it is at any given time. They do not fear the dark, do much of their magick after the sun goes down, and have the ability to speak with the Lady Luna herself. These witches also may choose (or be chosen by) one of the moons of another planet, such as Miranda or Europa., and will work with that particular celestial body.
Melodic Witch: A branch of Artistic that primarily uses song and musical instruments in their practice. They are very busy people, constantly practicing whatever instrument has currently caught their fancy. They easily make friends with Sirens and Lorelai in their common love of song, and attract Fae and Nymphs alike with the sounds of their voices.
Necromancer: A branch of Chaos magick, these witches take spirit working a step further, and are adept at communicating and controlling the dead. Necromancers usually have a familiar ‘wraith’ that acts much like an astral or spirit guide. Some can even raise the dead for a period of time to converse with them.
Nordic Witch: Witches who worship the deities of the Norse people.
Nymphatic Witch: These cutie pies are usually Hellenistic in their choice of deities, and are well versed in all the species of Nymphs, what they like, and where they live. They usually work with the ones that live in their local area and mirror them in their personalities. They hate wearing clothes, but when they do they prefer pastel colors. They are very whimsical, pleasant people to be around.  
Omni Witch: A bookworm and a know it all, this type of witch studies and practices all the fields of magick. They are innately curious about everything, and love to learn. They are talkative and eager to share the massive amount of knowledge they have absorbed.
Oracle: Branch of Spirit worker. Witches who primarily focus their practice on divination. Tarot, runes, pendulums, spirit boards, scrying, crystal gazing, aeromancy, stichomancy, sea gazing, animal gazing, bird watching, lynchomancy, ceromancy, astrology, numerology, amathomancy, dream interpretation, shufflemancy, tea leaf reading, people watching, palm reading, face reading. You name it, they probably know how to do it. Usually clairvoyant and have a number of other psychic abilities.
Otherkin Witch: A witch who is Otherkin. They relate to an inhuman or an animal in either personality or spirit, or believe they are a reincarnation of such. They behaviors and choice in deities and certain practices in their craft will usually reflect their kind of Kin. An example would be that a Felinekin might like using catnip in their rituals, and might call on Bastet, Sekhmet or Freya in their magick.  
Pop Culture Witch: A branch of Urban witchcraft. Witches that craft their spells based on popular music, movies, books and poetry. They are artistic and very educated and love to laugh. They can also curse the hell out of you. It’s not all Disney movies, folks.
Practical Witch: A branch of kitchen witch, they are adept at spellwork, and use their magick for everyday, mundane things. They adore the use of sigils and put them everywhere. Very down to earth individuals, who enjoy experimenting with ways to use magick to may their daily life easier and more enjoyable.
Satanic Witch: Witches who work with Lucifer. Usually very kind, nonjudgmental people.
Sea Witch: These witches hone their craft near a body of water, and center their practice around it. Some sea witches will work with fresh water, such as rivers or lakes (in which case they will usually call themselves ‘river’ or ‘lake’ witches), some with the ocean. Sea witches without immediate access to a body of water are called ‘land-locked’. They often form connections with fish of all kinds, know their local areas very well, are good at predicting the weather, and are friendly with the nymphs, fae and dragons of their region. They enjoy collecting sand and seashells and are adept at storm and sun magic.
Secular Witch: A witch who does not involve religion in their craft.
Shadow Worker: A combination of energy and hedge magick, the shadow worker tames and summons Shadows of their own past and personality. They regret nothing, are very in tune with their emotions, and spend a lot of time meditating. They are not afraid to confront their mistakes, because accepting the flawed pieces of their personality gives them power.
Solitary Witch: A witch who works in isolation. Usually very independent and stubborn, they take orders from no one.
Spirit Worker: A Witch who communes with the dead spirits of humans, animals, and others entities. Some can even communicate with the spirits of trees, rocks, and man-made items. They are usually very outspoken, opinionated people. They use spirit boards and pendulums, among many other tools. They enjoy taking strolls in graveyards and having casual chats with the dead. Also called Mediums.  
Star Witch: Not to be confused with a Space witch, who works with all of the cosmos, primarily aliens and astrology. Star witches draw their power from constellations, stars, and the sun. They love star gazing, have star charts hanging on the walls of their room, and never miss a meteor shower. Very chipper individuals who always want to go to the planetarium rather than out to see a movie or to the park. They may also work with planets as well as stars.
Stitch Witch: A brand of Kitchen and Cottage witchery that holds magickal fabric work in high regard. They focus primarily on knot and stitch magick. Very scatter-brained individuals. Their room are always in disarray, fabric and thread everywhere. Usually fond of cosplay. LOVE making Halloween costumes for their family and friends.
Storm Witch: This breed of witch is both terrifying and thrilling. They have a great sense of humor, and are usually very cryptic. They give zero fucks what people think of them and march to the beat of their own drum. They whistle up the winds and summon lightning. These witches are usually very adept at cursing and fear nothing. They like horror movies, cloudy weather, and casting emotionally charged spells. They are empathic individuals and always feel things to the extreme, there is no middle ground with them. Its black or white.
Subtle Witch: a witch who cannot be openly witchy due to their family, friends or environment.
Sun Witch: A witch who draws their power more from the sun, than the moon as most witches tend to do. Adept at fire magic and are usually very spirited individuals. They use candles often in their practice, and love to throw barbecues and bonfires with their many friends. They enjoy sunbathing. Their magick comes in giant bursts and they will often use a lot of energy at once.
Swamp Witch: A witch who works in the rivers and bayous of the world. They are adept at spirit communication and are versed in the traditions of their area. They enjoy wandering around their swamps, meeting familiars and befriending creepy crawlies. Their craft is usually a mix of traditional southern witchcraft and Hoodoo. They are very warm, hospitable individuals, but you should NEVER cross a Swamp witch. They are not afraid to curse your ass. These witches favor the healing powers of mud, enjoy mixing potions, reading next to a roaring fire and being with their family.
Tech Witch: A branch of Urban witchcraft, they work with html and other computer codes, have virtual altars to their deities, use old circuit boards as wards, old keypads from cell phones and laptops as spirit boards, and old broken electronic screens for scrying. They typically keep their grimoires as blogs. Very intelligent witches who are always on tumblr.
Theatrical Witch: Branch of Artistic witch. A player. They act and perform in plays to honor their deities, spend countless hours perfecting their lines and adore being dramatic. Very charismatic people who take pride in their work. Persistent. Never take no for an answer.
Urban Witch: City witches who graffiti sigils on abandoned buildings, grow herbs in pots in their apartments and are very technologically savvy. Technomagic is their jam, usually rocking enchanted headphones, weaving spells from their favorite songs and using their cell phones as scrying mirrors.
Vampiric Witch: A witch that either works with or is a vampire. They feed off the energy or emotions of others and use it to power their magick. They tend to be kind of clingy, but they are loyal as fuck and treasure their few friends. They have many secrets, and usually a dark past. They enjoy using blood in magick and are adept at healing and cursing. They are kind of vain, love gothic clothing, jewelry and expensive things.
Wiccan Witch: Started in England by Gerald Gardner in the 1950s in order to preserve the “old ways”, these cuties use rituals and invoke the power of the goddess for their craft. Some believe in the rule of three, wiccan rede, the triple goddess, and so on.
Winter Witch: Witches who reside in the colder climates of the world. They cast snowstorms, collect hail and make poppets from snow. Blizzards are their best friends. They love cold weather, and usually draw their power from the snow and clouds, rather than the sun or the moon, as neither are usually very visible during storms. Despite their chilly disposition, they are warm and friendly once you get to know them.
Witch of the Dance: Branch of Artistic Witch. They use dance in their practice, and are very physically sound. They may practice one on many kinds of dance, or even martial art. And they do so skillfully. They are usually very quiet people, but not at all shy or unsure of themselves. They would rather express their thoughts through movement and body language than actually speaking.
Witch of the Waste: Desert witches who work with sand and limited supplies. Hardy herbs are their best friends and they often use a lot of bone magic. They have an extensive fossil and skull collection and are constantly pouring over old field guilds for their local area. They can whip up sandstorms in the blink of an eye, and befriend scorpions, snakes, and coyotes alike. They are an enduring species of witch, weathering everything the world has to throw at them. Few things dampen their spirits.

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-The Astro Witch Project-

  • Aquarius - Heart Witch: The most humanitarian of all witch types, they can easily adapt to the energy that surrounds them. A witch who uses her various abilities to help the world. Empathetic and Helpful. They are adept at spirit communication and are versed in the telepathy and healing. They enjoy wandering around, getting lost, meeting familiars and befriending creepy all types of individuals. Their craft is usually a mix of traditional witchcraft and meditation. They are very warm, hospitable individuals, but you should NEVER cross a Heart witch. They are not afraid to curse your ass. These witches favor the healing powers of love, enjoy mixing potions, reading next to a roaring fire and being surrounded by their friends and family. 
  • Pisces - Storm Witch: This breed of witch is both terrifying and thrilling. Compassionate yet fearful. They have a great sense of humor, and are usually very cryptic. They give zero fucks what people think of them and march to the beat of their own drum. Are usually very friendly, so they often find themselves in a company of very different people. Storm witches are selfless, they are always willing to help others, without hoping to get anything back.They whistle up the winds and summon lightning. Their overly trusting nature makes them an easy target for the ill-informed, but be careful, because these witches are very exceptional at cursing and fear nothing. They like horror movies, cloudy weather, and casting emotionally charged spells. They are empathetic individuals and always feel things to the extreme, there is often no middle ground with them. It’s black or white. 
  • Aries - Energy Witch: Witches that perform all of their magic internally. Their magic is one of pure energy that they pull from their courageous hearts. Using circles casts in their heads and their imaginations, they can bring their will to life. Are usually shy and keep to themselves. But they are also fiery and energetic. They enjoy divination and astral projection. Also called Intrinsic Witches. 
  • Taurus - Portal Witch: An undying need to always be surrounded by loved ones and hedonism, Portal witches possess superhuman agility and the ability to teleport with the aid of magical portals. This type of witch also uses easily obtained items and weaves magick into every aspect of their life. These witches have the ability to see things from a grounded, practical and realistic perspective.They are particularly fond of cooking, arts and crafts, sewing, cleaning, gardening and baking. They are skilled in potions, herbology, and subtle magick. Reliable and devoted, these witches are described as the original earth mothers.
  • Gemini - Shadow Witch: A witch that lives between two worlds. They easily cross over into The Fade, the shadowrealm, a dimension only accessible to these witches. They can be in both realms at once, or split from their shadows and be in one realm together. Very gentle and curious, they know how to fun with their abilities! Ever lose something 5 seconds after putting it down? That was probably a shadow witch joking around with you! Being in two places at once can be useful! Being in two places at once all the while undetected…dangerous! They are also clairvoyant and have a number of other psychic abilities. 
  • Cancer - Sea Witch: Highly imaginative and emotional! Loyal and sympathetic, these witches hone their craft near a body of water, and center their practice around it. Some sea witches will work with fresh water, such as rivers or lakes (in which case they will usually call themselves ‘river’ or ‘lake’ witches), some with the ocean. Sea witches without immediate access to a body of water are called ‘land-locked’, which can cause them to become a bit moody or pessimistic. They often form connections with fish of all kinds, know their local areas very well, are good at predicting the weather, and are friendly with the nymphs, fae and dragons of their region. They enjoy collecting sand and seashells and are adept at storm and sun magic.
  • Leo - Pop Culture Witch: A branch of Urban witchcraft. Witches that craft their spells based on popular music, movies, books and poetry. They are very adept at pyromancy (fire magic). These witches are very creative and passionate about everything that they do. Their mystical abilities are influenced by various aspects of their character. No pop culture witch is the same as another. They are artistic and very educated and love to laugh. Energetic and Dominant. Loyal, yet headstrong. Do not cross them. They can also curse the hell out of you. It’s not all Disney movies, folks. 
  • Virgo - Hedge Witch: A witch that can not only communicate with all wildlife, they can also share consciousness with them. Thier natural loyal and hardworking nature allow them to do so with ease. They can also manipulate the size of any creature, configuring its scale to accomplish any task! Though skilled at working with animals and magickal creatures, they can often struggle with opening up to others. They use their relationship with animals to accomplish unimaginable things. Often tender but also very careful, they are very organised and practical about their craft.These witches are also very adept at spirit communication, energy work, and levitation. Also called Omega Witches. 
  • Libra - Urban Witch: Fair-minded and peaceful, these witches have an expressed intellect and a keen mind. They can be inspired by good books, insurmountable discussions and interesting people. City witches who graffiti sigils on abandoned buildings, grow herbs in pots in their apartments and are very technologically savvy. Technomagic is their jam, usually rocking enchanted headphones, weaving spells from their favorite songs and using their cell phones as scrying mirrors. 
  • Scorpio - Spirit Worker: Mysterious and seductive, Spirit witches are one of a kind. A witch who communes with the dead spirits of humans, animals, and others entities. Some can even communicate with the spirits of trees, rocks, and man-made items. They are usually very outspoken, opinionated people, though only show their full force when completely necessary. They use spirit boards and pendulums, among many other tools. They enjoy taking strolls in graveyards and having casual chats with the dead. Also called Mediums. 
  • Sagittarius - Moon Witch: A witch whos abilities change depending on the phases of the moon. The full extent of their power being at full potential during the full moon. They are particularly fond of comedy shows, group activities, spell crafting with fellow witches, and collecting. They are very skilled in herbology and dark magick. Generous and idealistic, these witches incorporate magic into their optimistic goals. These witches know how to transform their thoughts into concrete actions and they will do anything to achieve their goals. Also called Lunar Witches. 
  • Capricorn - Chaos Witch: A witch who uses baneful magick in their craft. They will sometimes use demons, storm magick, blood magick, and cursing in their practice. They fear nothing. Commonly mislabeled ‘black’ or ‘dark’ witch. Which is not correct. Tsk tsk. These witches are responsible, disciplined, have more self-control than most, and are very good managers. They pull most of their power from their love of family and tradition. Their powers are very practical and are considered to be the most serious of the witch community.

Inspired by this post

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You can never predict the crazy critters cruising by the Aquarium’s back deck!


UPDATE! Hey everyone reading this! We heard back from our jelly aquarist Wyatt, and this siphonophore is actually in the genus Rosacea, not Praya—apparently it had been mislabelled for years in the gelatinous zooplankter book! It is in the Prayidae family of siphonophores, but the lack of taxonomic clarity in the siphonophore family has led this animal to be misidentified with Praya in a few different places—we’re glad to offer this update to you all! Happy jelly watching!

What the Hell is “Gaslighting”?

In 1938, a stage play called “Gas Light” debuted for the first time. The play is about a husband who gradually convinces his wife she’s insane by acting strangely and secretly manipulating objects in the house - like dimming the gas lights in the attic - and refusing to acknowledge that they’ve changed. Today, the term “gaslighting” is used to describe any behaviour designed to make another person question their sanity. 

Gaslighting is abusive behaviour. Any person who tries to make you doubt your own sanity does not have your best interests at heart. Gaslighting is a tool to keep you in an abusive relationship, and prevent you from reaching out for help. 

In its weakest form, gaslighting means convincing you that you are misremembering or exaggerating something that happened. “I never said it like that, you’re exaggerating!” or “You’re making it sound worse than it was!” are common examples of gaslighting. At the end of the conversation, you might even find yourself apologizing to the other person, even though you were pretty sure that they were in the wrong. This sort of thing can happen in a normal relationship, especially if one or both parties aren’t very self-aware, but it’s a concern if it happens all the time… especially if only one person seems to have a faulty memory.

Gaslighting can also mean convincing you that events didn’t happen at all. Your abuser can absolve themselves of responsibility, and keep you in check, by convincing you that abuse never took place. “We never had a fight at my brother’s wedding… are you feeling okay?” or “I’ve never thrown anything at you in my life! Do you have a fever or something?” are more serious examples of gaslighting, and they are absolutely not okay. If someone is trying to convince you that a fight or episode of abuse never happened, that’s a huge red flag that cannot be ignored. 

At its very worst, abusers may go out of their way to stage strange events in order to confuse their victims. An abuser trying to keep a victim in check, or socially isolate a victim, may go out of their way to act strangely in order to make their victim doubt their own mind. Abusers may steal things from you, disappear for days on end and claim that they told you where they were going (or deny being gone), or mislabel your reactions as they’re happening (eg. pretending that you are irrationally angry when you are actually calm). These are also huge red flags, and cannot be ignored. 

Gaslighting is not unique to abusive romantic relationships: it is also common in toxic parent/child relationships, sibling relationships, friendships or school bullying. Anyone who mistreats you can gaslight you. 

The best defense against gaslighting is self-confidence, and careful recording. Trust in your own mind. You know when you’ve been abused. You know your own reactions. And write things down - keeping a careful record of abusive incidents and what was said or done gives you a record to consult when someone else gets in your head. 

Gaslighting can make it especially difficult to recognize and leave a bad relationship, and no one deserves to go through it. Know the signs. Protect yourself. You deserve better. 

It's Okay To Be A-Spec

♠️ being a-spec doesn’t make you Straight

♠️ being a-spec doesn’t make you homophobic

♠️ being a-spec doesn’t dehumanize you

♠️ being a-spec doesn’t sexualize or romanticize everyone else around you

♠️ using microlabels doesn’t make you a “special snowflake” or mean you’re “trying to be oppressed”

♠️ it’s okay to be a-spec, cisgender and het attracted

♠️ it’s okay to head canon characters as a-specs, including minors and characters of color

♠️ it’s okay to be neurodivergent, mentally ill, and/or a trauma survivor + a-spec, you aren’t any less of an a-spec for it

♠️ demi- and grey- a-specs are real and valid

♠️ aceflux and aroflux are real and valid

♠️ arospike and acespike are real and valid

♠️ it’s okay to be a-spec and questioning

♠️ it’s okay to be romance and/or sex repulsed, and being so doesn’t make you homophobic

♠️ it’s okay if you’re a minor and a-spec, you’re never too young to know

♠️ it’s okay if you’re an adult and a-spec, you’re never too old to know

♠️ it’s okay if one day you are no longer a-spec, either because of mislabeling or because sexuality is fluid and can change over time, it doesn’t make your time as an a-spec any less valid

♠️ it’s okay to be proud of being a-spec

♠️ being a-spec isn’t TMI or gross

and last but not least…

♠️ a-specs are wonderful, a-specs are strong, a-specs are marvelous and valid and real and I love each and every single one of you

💚♠️💜

good morning, it’s me: Bad Cat

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LGBT+ MASTERLIST PROJECT BY ROCIO @nuevayor​

Week One: TELEVISION
Week Two: MOVIES
Week Three: BOOKS
Week Four: POETRY
Week Five: MUSIC
Week Six: COMICS
Week Seven: DOCUMENTARIES
Week Eight: PODCASTS
Week Ten: HISTORY
Week Eleven: RESOURCES
Week Twelve: THANK YOU + GOODBI

Week Nine: Hello again and welcome back to the LGBT+ Masterlist Project!

I had originally named this post ‘BLOGS + VLOGS’ but after the overwhelming amount of suggestions specific to YouTube channels, I figured to dedicate this week’s post entirely to YouTubers. Voilà, here we are!

The genres vary this week, as always. We’ve got beauty vlogs, lifestyle vlogs, cooking vlogs, music vlogs, talk show set ups, and a bunch of other types of content! One thing is for sure, and the whole point of this entire project: these are all LGBT+ YouTubers. A lot of them are here on Tumblr too! So I added their @’s for you as well. 

If you think I’ve mislabeled someone (as in, if I have put them in this list or in the gifs above when they aren’t LGBT+), please tell me immediately as there’s nothing I value more than accuracy - I will be sure to follow up. In addition! If you’ve got recs, don’t hesitate to send them my way (particularly LGBT+ YouTubers who are people of color - I was underwhelmed to see the vast yet not so diverse YouTube vlogging landscape when it came to popularity.)

Next week: LGBT+ HISTORY - a compilation of academic journals, articles, autobiographies, YouTube videos, and other types of media that cover the long and too often glossed over history of the vast and diverse LGBT+ community. If you have any recommendations, send them my way!

Enjoy: LGBT+ YOUTUBERS

  • Pero Like - “Pero, like… You know what we mean. Weekly videos of tu vida.” A Latinx-oriented vlog in which one of the YouTubers is Salvadoran and gay, but LGBT topics are not the main thing they vlog about
  • Shannon @now-this-is-living​ & Cammie @the-2nd-star-to-the-right on their channel nowthisisliving - A lesbian couple who are “just sharing [their] story/love/life with anyone who wants to listen”
  • Claudia Boleyn - A bisexual YouTuber who makes videos about mental health and social justice issues
  • Miles Jai  (giffed above) - Posts improv sketches, parodies, “beauty tutorials”, as well as vlogs
  • Kat Blaque @katblaque (giffed above) - “Opinion Vlogger, Children’s Illustrator and Thrift Store Addict”
  • Sara @rnashallah(giffed above) - Totally not putting her up here because we’ve been mutuals on Tumblr for like mad long and I’m just very fond of Sara as a person. She vlogs about her life and tbh that alone is worth a sub in my book!
  • Eileen W. @peeves(giffed above) - Another good friend of mine (let me live). HILARIOUS, sarcastic, honest, and is pretty much always there to Validate You, so support her and subscribe!
  • Marina Watanabe @marinashutup​ (giffed above) - “Part time feminist vlogger, full time sass machine. Biracial, bisexual, bipedal.”
  • Kid Fury @signedfury - “Born in Miami and raising hell in New York City, Kid Fury is a media mouthpiece with a whole lot of nerve. This channel is one of many avenues Fury uses to cover life, pop culture and more with a unique and sharp flare of truth, shade, and fuckery.”
  • AriFitz @itsarifitz - Lifestyle + style vlog

Keep reading

I really wish people on the internet didn’t throw around mental disorder diagnoses without actually understanding them like…mislabeling something on a site like this just misleads a ton of other impressionable ppl, and it’s irritating to see someone wrongly label symptoms or justify a mislabeling with this front of infallible authority when they’re just…wrong haha

It’s better to be cautious with labeling something a disorder when you don’t actually know if that’s what it is. That includes your favorite character or someone else’s symptoms…like it’s one thing to recommend researching a disorder/asking a professional about it or having a headcanon or something, but just, remember to be humble about it

I am an old lesbian.

Things have changed, like a lot!

- Subaru was the car company for lesbians to get out and stay out in. Now it’s Jeep and they don’t even have a Dana Fairbanks!

- People didn’t care that there was a masculine character with a feminine character, like Shane and Carmen. But now people find that odd. They want couples that look like Brittany and Santana.

- Oh and now Butch is a bad word? This one is still lost on me!

- Some of these kids haven’t even seen The L Word. And that was like a requirement when I was younger.

- Apparently we now have to clarify that trans woman that are also lesbian, or people of color that are lesbians are included. Like ma… of course, y'all were always included!
*If you do not include these folks, well you suck, please leave! We don’t want you here bitch!

- There are new lines within the LGBT+ community, ones that divide us out a lot more. Dude, we call it The Family for a reason. We is Family yo, we are all here we are all queer, it’s good.
*And that includes non-binary, fluid, asexual, and all y'all people too!! The +… y'all make the community go from an A to an A+… y'all important and y'all matter!! All y'all.

- Labels have always been an issue, but recently now if you use terminology mistakenly.. it’s a personal attack. But for a long time, you just politely corrected people and went about your day. Like yo I’m sorry I fucked up, but I fuck up my own address (that I’ve had for years) on the regular. We talk wrong sometimes, it’s not always personal.
*and to the folks that do mislabel other on purpose, fuck you, get up off my post!


So… I have some how managed to become an old lesbian some how. And I guess it’s cool. But like… I’m only 24 y'all. I know we progressive n shit… but like I already have grey hairs, I am not ready to be old yet!

anonymous asked:

According to Time Magazine, William Stephen Hamilton is the one who resembles his father Alexander Hamilton the most. I can't find any portraits to verify this but maybe you found one before? I am so curious @_@ Thanks! :D

You’ve probably already seen his portrait without knowing it.  This is in fact William Stephen Hamilton, even though the portrait is often mislabeled as one of Philip Hamilton:

So a couple weeks ago, I promised @copperbadge a review of the book I was currently reading, “Sorting the Beef from the Bull: The Science of Food Fraud Forensics.” And then my cat had a life threatening medical emergency (he’s okay!) and I got a little distracted. But, hey, better late than never, right?
First things first. I’m not a huge chemistry nerd. The word “science” is in the title for a reason. There’s a fair amount of it in here. I skimmed most of it. But there are two other aspects to the book that are fascinating and, honestly, rather terrifying. First, actual stories of food fraud throughout the world and history. Second, the non-immediate implications of it, looking at what it means for politics, economics, health, and the environment. It’s an extremely strong argument for the importance of regulations and, if you’re not terrified by the current push in the US government to deregulate, you will be. It’s a sadly timely book.

It starts out with an overview of the field, a couple anecdotes of food fraud (fake eggs in China, horse meat found in hamburger in UK grocery stores- one of the authors is British, so lots of examples from there), a breakdown of some of the scientific methods using the example of honey and why the whole issue is important.

Most people probably can think of the economic implications of things like olive oil being cut with cheaper oils. Consumers lose out on money, because we’re paying for a product based on the label, not what’s in it. Plus, it impacts honest sellers who have their market undercut by the cheaters. Raises some interesting questions on the idea that deregulation makes for a “freer” market place. 

The environmental implications are also concerning, and frankly, I may stop eating seafood. Turns out a lot of fish is mislabeled. Some of this can be chalked up to inconsistent naming conventions across countries, but given that fish are almost always mislabeled as more expensive varieties, that’s doubtful. But, important for those of us who try to eat responsibly, there have been cases of endangered species relabeled as allowable ones. Apparently, seafood laundering is a real thing. (A terrible thing, with a name that cracks me up). And good luck trying to be sure that your organic food is really organic. you may just be paying extra for the same stuff the rest of us are eating. 

But the scariest is the health implications. Olive oil is a good example in two cases. Mostly, you’re just overpaying, but it’s been adulterated with peanut oil in some cases. And then there’s the Toxic Oil Syndrome in Spain, where colza oil intended for industrial use was sold as “olive oil” in 1981 and killed over 600 people. Other horrifying examples include “monkfish” that turned out to be puffer fish (yikes!), fake baby formula in China, and chicken deemed not fit for human consumption that was washed up, trimmed of the ugly bits and then sold.

Some of it is not so horrifying from a health perspective, but more offends our sensibilities. The horse meat example, for instance, is not something that would hurt many people’s health. Heck, it’s probably lower in fat than beef. Ground meat was commonly found to contain other meat sources than the label said. All beef products, such as sausages, were found to contain chicken or pork, the later of which would certainly offend Jewish and Muslim consumers, but I’m fairly sure most religions don’t hold you responsible for something you are completely unaware of. A few have been found to contain rat, which certainly makes us go “ick” but unless it’s diseased, it probably won’t hurt us. 

The end result is a very strong argument of the importance of funded regulatory bodies, because the average consumer can’t determine this stuff for themself. Heck, the average chemist probably can’t figure out some of this stuff, because it’s ever evolving and our global food stream means there are too many points along the way where it takes one person looking to make a buck to screw people over, and people are really fucking creative at times. There are some amazing ways to catch issues, but a lot of people won’t want to pay for them, so only a portion of cases get caught. 

I was talking with a friend about the book and her response was “Wow, that’s important to know. Not sure I WANT to know.” True that.

Here’s a list of books releasing in 2017 that contain F/F or women who feel attraction and/or romantic feelings toward women/femme aligned people. Not all of these books have these relationships as the main one or the endgame so pay attention when reading the summary. If you are aware of a book missing you can reblog to add more. Send me a message if a book has been mislabeled.


MG:

Star-Crossed by Barbara Dee


YA:

10 Things I Can See From Here by Carrie Mac

27 Hours by Tristina Wright

A Line in the Dark by Malinda Lo

Echo After Echo by Amy Rose Capetta

Keep reading

Any breakfast cereal aficionado could tell you that General Mills only manufacturers and distributes Count Chocula for a couple of months leading up to Hallowe’en; it’s not normally available at any other time of year.

Well, it turns out that my local grocery co-op managed to lose track of a whole crate of the stuff last October - mislabeled or somesuch, I’m not 100% sure - and only realised they still had it in their storeroom just now.

So of course they put it out on the shelves. I mean, it’s pure sugar - it’s not like it expires. And they really want to get rid of the stuff, so it’s like $2 per box.

Long story short, I’m eating Count Chocula in February. Whee~

nytimes.com
An Eminent Psychiatrist Demurs on Trump’s Mental State - The New York Times

“Most amateur diagnosticians have mislabeled President Trump with the diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder. I wrote the criteria that define this disorder, and Mr. Trump doesn’t meet them. He may be a world-class narcissist, but this doesn’t make him mentally ill, because he does not suffer from the distress and impairment required to diagnose mental disorder.

Mr. Trump causes severe distress rather than experiencing it and has been richly rewarded, rather than punished, for his grandiosity, self-absorption and lack of empathy. It is a stigmatizing insult to the mentally ill (who are mostly well behaved and well meaning) to be lumped with Mr. Trump (who is neither).”