Gen had you sputtering your drink all
over the table.
“The fuck Gen?” You asked her.
“I think I’m lost here.” Zac said as he
turned to you.
“You’re not the only one.” You replied.
“Wait. That’s actually a brilliant idea!”
“Okay, hear us out.” Gen begged.
“Jensen and Jared are going to flip shit
if they find out you left the bar with a man! It’s going to be amazing. You can tell them tomorrow that you went home
with a man, but give out no details.
Then Zac could like randomly show up on set tomorrow, but be there to
see you. You’re actors; you could
totally make this work!” Gen said. Daneel was almost bouncing in her seat with excitement.
You wanted to tell them off, you wanted
to throw a drink in their face, something to show how much they had embarrassed
you. But the voice you heard next
stopped you from doing any of that.
“I’m in.” Zac said.
Now you had to ‘pretend’ to be interested in this man that you were
definitely interested in. The fuck did
those two get you into?
“Um, alright?” you said, rather unsure.
You four sat at the table and hashed out
the details for a while. Everyone was
quiet when they heard the bartender announce that they would be starting karaoke
soon. You sat in your seat quietly. You had signed up to sing, but now you weren’t
sure that you could do it. You weren’t
nervous to sing around anyone, but with the events of tonight, you weren’t sure
if you wanted to.
“Alright, first up we have the very
special, very beautiful Y/N!”
groaned. No time like now I guess.
You got up from your seat and went to the
stage, being sure you took your drink with you.
You gulped it down and got a little bit of courage from it.
You smiled wide and sat behind the piano
they had there.
my three ‘brothers’ were here, I’d dedicate this to them!” You said, winking at
You played the opening chords of “This is
Gospel” by Panic! At the Disco.
This is gospel for
the fallen ones
Locked away in permanent slumber
Assembling their philosophies
From pieces of broken memories
You smiled as you continued to sing, losing some of your
The gnashing teeth and criminal
tongues conspire against the odds
But they haven’t seen the best of us yet
If you love me let me go
If you love me let me go
‘Cause these words are knives that often leave scars
The fear of falling apart
And truth be told, I never was yours
The fear, the fear of falling apart
You could hear the girls, and Zac,
whooping and cheering from your table.
is gospel for the vagabonds
Naturals and insufferable bastards
Confessing their apostasies
Lead away by imperfect imposters
You tried to lower your voice like
Brendon does, but only ended up laughing through the next line.
try and sleep through the end of the world
and bury me alive. Cause I won’t put up without a fight
If you love me let me go
If you love me let me go
'Cause these words are knives that often leave scars
The fear of falling apart
And truth be told, I never was yours
The fear, the fear of falling apart
The fear of falling apart, The fear
of falling apaaart
The fear of falling apart. The fear of falling apart.
You slowly moved your hands from the keys of piano. You got up
and took a small bow and waved.
“Oh my goodness that was so much fun!” You said, sitting back at
“I’m surprised you didn’t sing Miss Jackson.” Gen said, knowing
that was your favorite song.
“I wanted to so bad! But with all the crying today, it would
have hurt too badly.” You reminded her.
“Rough scenes?” Zac asked.
“Oh ya know, just fighting with my husband, making me jealous,
the norm.” Daneel said.
“She’s kidding!” You quickly replied.
“Yeah, I figured.” Zac said, shooting you a smile. He excused himself from the table, saying he’d
be right back.
“Guys, what the fuck. I
can’t pretend to like that man, I actually like that man! This sucks.” You said.
“Oh honey. We know that!”
Daneel said, eyes holding nothing but mischief.
“I hate you both, just know that.” You said, groaning.
“Alright guys! Tonight we have a special guest that wants to
sing. Please help me in welcoming Zac
Levi to the stage!” The announcer said.
You whipped your head around to the stage and saw Zac standing
there, smile plastered on his face.
“This one’s for you Y/N.
Said it was your favorite.” Zac
said, and the opening chords of Miss Jackson started playing.
Oh dear sweet baby Jesus, Zac Levi is a Panic! At the Disco
fan. You looked over to Daneel and Gen,
who had their mouths wide open at this point.
“Oh god, this is too good.” Daneel said, sitting back in her
“You’re Rachel is showing.” You pointed out.
Her only response was to flip you off.
Zac continued to sing and he walked off the stage towards you.
“You’re voice hurt too bad to do the middle part?” He asked
You grabbed the mic from him right before it started.
Climbing out the back door didn’t
leave a mark. No one knows it’s you Miss
Jackson. Found another victim but no one’s gonna find Miss Jackson, Jackson,
Jackson you sang, dancing a little.
Zac’s eyes were wide and he grabbed the mic back. I love her anyway he sang before walking
back to the stage.
You were completely transfixed. You knew he could sing, but he
sounded amazing in Brendon’s place, and you never thought you’d say that.
“Best. Idea. Ever.” Gen said.
She was watching you as you were watching Zac. Zac finished the song and came back down to
“Dude! That was fucking amazing. I can’t believe you know that
song!” You gushed.
“Come on. Panic is amazing.” Zac said, as if it were the most
common thing in the world.
The night progressed from there.
Gen and Daneel had drivers coming to pick them up, while you were going
to take a taxi. Unlike Gen and Daneel,
you didn’t have a house here in Vancouver.
You stayed in a little 2 bedroom apartment that they provided for
you. It was more room than you needed. You didn’t have any kids or a spouse. Hell,
you didn’t even have a cat.
You and Zac decided to go back to your place and hang out some
more. You knew it wasn’t going to be
anything sexual. He’d just gotten a divorce and wasn’t over it at all the last
time you saw him, and you barely knew him.
You weren’t the type of person to fall into bed with a man you barely
You realized once you got in the cab that you didn’t check your
phone a single time tonight. You grabbed
it out of your clutch and realized you had 15 text messages. You giggled to yourself knowing most, if not
all, were from Jared, Jensen, and/or Misha.
“What’s so funny over there?” Zac asked.
You showed him your phone.
“You weren’t kidding were you?” He asked.
“Not in the slightest.” You said.
You scooted closer to Zac so he could get a peek at your insane
Jensen: Have fun tonight, sorry we’re
acting a little crazy. I know you were just joking about the man. You WERE just joking right?
Jared: Don’t do it.
Misha: Those two are freaking out
over here Y/N. It’s hilarious.
Jensen: Daneel told me you did
karaoke. That’s a good sign!
“What does he mean by that?” Zac asked.
“Oh, Jensen just found out I could sing. Like today. And now he’s
got this crazy notion he’s going to get me in front of the fans and sing a song
with him!” You said.
“He’ll never let you forget until you give in.” Zac stated.
“I know, but I have some things up my sleeve.”
You continued reading the messages, laughing because many of
them were of the same variety. Except the last one. You were really going to kill Daneel.
Jensen: Seriously Y/N! You took a guy
home from the bar that you’d just met? Jared is going to flip shit when he
finds out. See you bright and early
You groaned, while Zac laughed.
“This is going to be so awesome.”
You and Zac ended up talking for nearly two hours. You offered him your guest bedroom, which he
kindly accepted. In the morning, you’d
gotten up and realized that he was up too.
“You’re up early.” You noted.
“I can’t believe how excited I am for today. It’s going to be so
much fun to see their faces.” Zac said.
“You guys are such children.” You chided playfully.
“Well, I gotta go. Lock
the door handle on your way out. See you
around lunch time?” You asked.
“Of coooourse darling.” He teased.
You just shook your head; this was going to be harder than you
Pulling into the lot, you weren’t surprised to find Jensen and
Jared there waiting for you.
You shut your car door and strolled over to them.
“Something the matter, boys?” You asked innocently.
“Don’t play dumb with us.” Jared said.
“Jesus, what’s the big deal. It was one guy. I took him home,
had my way with him, and sent him on his way. Or at least I think I did. He was
still at my apartment when I left.” You said, positively loving this now.
Jared and Jensen both had no words for what you said.
“You..You left a man, a strange man, a stranger man, in your
apartment when you left?” Jensen asked, bewildered.
“What? I told him to lock up first!” You said, walking away.
“See you guys on set.” You said, waving your hands in the air.
You opened a group chat and immediately added in Daneel and
You: This is so much better than I
imagined it to be.
Daneel: Jensen was so frustrated when
he left the house. But I think he was worried too. Just beware, when he realizes that you didn’t
take a man home last night, he’s going to want payback.
You: Well…I technically took a man
home last night.
You: You guys know I didn’t do
anything. We sat around and talked. He
slept in the extra bedroom and called me darling when I left this morning. He is so in character it’s not even funny.
Daneel: I don’t think that’s
Gen: OMG I’m coming to the set for
Daneel: Me too. See you soon!!
You put your phone away just as you were leaving for hair and makeup. You were doing light scenes today, so it didn’t
matter. You didn’t have any speaking
lines, you just had ‘montage’ shots of you throughout the bunker while Dean is
You went to set and did the necessary poses and tasks they
wanted you to do. You were so busy
thinking about Zac that you dropped a plate on accident. You put your hands on
the counter and braced yourself while you tried not to blush from embarrassing
“I like what you did there with the plate, that was good.” Misha
“Would you believe me if I told you I didn’t do it on purpose.”
You asked him
“Yeah, I really would.” Misha said. “Jensen and Jared are
looking for you.” He gave you a
skeptical look and walked away.
You squared your shoulders as you walked to Jared’s
trailer. His was the biggest since he
had the biggest family. That’s where the
group would get together and eat.
You didn’t even knock just walked right in. Gen and Daneel were
here, but the kids weren’t.
“Hey honey. How’s it going?” Gen asked you.
“Good. I had some pretty good takes. Accidentally dropped a plate, and Misha thought
it added to the scene.” You said.
“Aw, too busy thinking about your man?” Daneel asked.
“There is no man. I’ve come to the conclusion you guys are just
being assholes.” Jared stated.
“You’re right, I’m just being an asshole.” You said, but had a
devilish smile on your face.
Someone knocked on the door.
“Jared, Y/N in there? She’s
got a visitor.” One of the assistance said.
“Ooooh bet I know who that is.” Daneel said.
Jared instantly jumped up and ran for the door. He opened it and the stern look fell off his
“Good one Betts” Jared said, letting their guest into the
“I didn’t know you’d be coming up man. It’s awesome to see you!
What brings you around.” Jared asked, ushering Zac into the room.
“DUDE!” Jensen got up and hugged him. “Nice to see you.” He
“You too. I’m actually here to see Y/N.” He said. He found your eyes, and smiled brightly.
“You left in such a hurry this morning I wasn’t sure if you
wanted to meet up or anything. Thought I’d
just stop by.” Zac said, coming over to sit next to you. He surprised you by placing a kiss on your
You looked over to Jensen and Jared and noticed it hadn’t quite kicked
in what Zac had said. But once it had,
you could literally see the light bulb go off in their head.
You and Daneel sat in the trailer and talked for about
another half hour before you were told you were needed back on set.
“Alright I gotta go.” You said to Daneel.
“I talked to Gen, I’m glad we’re still on for tonight. Although she seems a little disappointed that
you’re never man hunting.” Daneel laughed.
“Oh god you two, give it up.
I’m happily unmarried, isn’t that enough?” You said throwing your hands
up to your face.
“I don’t know. You’re
pretty hot; you might take my husband someday.” She said. This was a constant “battle” between you
two. People were always making more out
of the situation than it is. Jensen,
Jared, and Misha are all like brothers to you.
You couldn’t even imagine yourself with Jensen. Kissing him on set was weird enough. Daneel knew that you were a loyal friend, she
just like playing up what tabloids and fans say.
“You’re a bitch.” You told her.
“Love you! See you tonight!” She said, towing sleeping JJ in her
You followed behind her and went into hair and makeup. There were only a few adjustments that needed
to be made to your hair, but your makeup was another story. You forgot that your previous scene had been
a crying one and that meant the makeup needed to be almost redone
completely. You sat in the chair and
tried to get back to your sad zone. This
is probably the part you hated most on being in a dramatic show. You liked to think you were a great actress,
but sometimes you couldn’t cry on que.
That’s when the past comes in.
You use things from your past that have caused you pain and you use
those emotions to pull through the scene.
Over the years, you’ve gotten good at not holding on to those emotions
once the scene is over.
You got done with hair and makeup and walked to the set. Misha had now changed from his street clothes
to his ‘Cas’ clothes. You let out a
“Nice to see you, Cas.” You said.
“Fuck you, Y/N.” Misha responded.
“Aw, I love you too Brother Bear.” At that, Misha’s eyes melted a little and he
“Take some time and get back into the mindset you were in when
yours and Jensen scene ended. It sucks,
but you gotta go back to that place.” Misha said.
“I know. How long do I
got?” You asked him.
“Can you get there in 15 minutes?” He asked.
“Yeah, I’m going to grab Jensen so we can run those lines quick
so I can keep my place.” You said, and you scampered off towards Jensen’s
trailer. You started to let some of the
emotion through and you could feel it weighing on you little by little.
Jensen was sitting outside his trailer with Jared and
Richard. Richard wasn’t on set for a
reason, he was just hanging out. That
man, is a weird one. You loved every
minute of him being there.
“Can you come run a few lines with me?” You asked Jensen.
“What’s wrong Y/N? Mad
because Jensen found out your talent?” Richard asked.
“Oh, fuck off. I’m
getting into my not happy place for the scene I need to shoot with Misha.” You
“Oh, yeah, I’m right behind you.” Jensen said, as if just
remembering you had to do the rest of the hard scenes today.
“Sorry babe, just thought I’d mess with ya.” Richard said.
“It’s all good. I knew you didn’t mean anything by it. Just trying to stay in character as long as I
can. Misha gave me 15 minutes and I need
to be a sobbing mess.” You said, trying to play it off.
“I’ll be on set, watching you.” Richard said, giving you a
you muttered under your breath before you turned away from them.
You walked to the “bunker” and you sat on the bed. You kept letting sad thoughts roll in and you
started crying. Jensen came up to you
and startled you by sitting on the bed next to you.
“You ready?” Jensen asked.
“Yeah.” You responded.
“Okay, here’s what I’m going to do, I’m going to be filming you and Jensen
again and when you fall to your knees, I’ll come in and take over.” Misha said
from the side.
You found your headspace really easily. You and Jensen ran your lines and you sunk
down to your knees in almost the exact same spot as you had before.
“Liv.” You heard from above you.
You didn’t need to lift your head to know that it was Cas standing next
“Liv, get up.”
“Get out Castiel. I don’t
need you here.” You said, sobs wrecking your body.
“I don’t understand why you’re refusing to talk to me. Did I do something wrong?” He asked,
innocence in his voice.
“No, you’ve done nothing. Nothing at all.” You pulled your head up to look at him.
Surprise shown in his eyes when he met the anger in yours.
“I don’t know why you’re looking at me like that.” Cas said.
“Didn’t you hear me? You’re doing NOTHING. You’re standing here
talking to me. Where is Dean right now,
huh? Why is he out there and you’re here talking to me? I don’t get it. I don’t
understand how the two of you can be okay with him going out there. He’s going to die Cas! Don’t you get that?”
At this point, you’d gotten up and went over to Cas. You put your finger on his chest and pressed,
“Please, I need you to calm down. Dean has been doing this a long time. He
knows how to be careful. I promise you.” Cas tried to reason with you.
“Yeah, and how about the Mark of Cain. That going to keep him safe?” You asked.
Cas’s face tensed up when he heard that phrase.
“You know about that?” He asked.
“What? He’s supposed to hide shit from me now?” You asked.
“That’s not how this works.”
“CUT!” You heard.
“Why, that was going so good. I’m so angry right now!” You said
“Yeah, I know. That’s why you tried to say shit on cable.” Misha
“Aw, fuck. Okay come let’s get right back up.” You said.
They gave you the signal and you continued on.
“You know about that?” Cas asked.
Your sadness was replaced with anger, and your tears all but
dried up in an instant.
“Of course. What, he’s
supposed to hide things from me now? That’s
not how this works. Dean and I are a
team. We tell each other things and we
NEVER lie to each other. I’ve never had
something like this in my life before.
I’ve never had someone like Dean before.
I can’t let him get taken away from me.
Not now. I can’t let it happen. So you need to do something. Take your feathery ass wherever you need to,
but bring him back home.”
“I’m sorry. I can’t do that. You know I can’t do that. Dean needs to take care of this. He has Sam, he’ll be fine.” Cas said, trying
to find reason with you.
“Than your as completely useless to me as you are to him.” You
said. You regretted it instantly,
knowing how much that would hurt Cas, but you couldn’t find it in you to
“Good job guys. That’s a wrap
for the day.” Misha said.
He pulled you aside. “You
did a great job today. These scenes are
never easy but you were a champ today.”
“Not really. I’m going to get drunk with Daneel and Gen now so
I’m going to lose my feelings that way.” You said.
“That’s my girl.” Misha said, bumping shoulders with you.
You went back to your trailer and put on some music. You took a quick shower and decided you’d get
ready to go out here instead of driving home first, you just didn’t have time
After the shower you towel dried your hair and left it
alone. You always loved the way it
looked when it dried naturally. You
threw on a pair of black leggings and a long red and white chevron style
shirt. You put minimal make up on, but
donned your favorite blood red lipstick.
You decided you’d stick with flats tonight, because you weren’t sure
where you’d be going tonight.
Halfway through your favorite song, you head someone knocking on
the trailer door.
“It’s open.” You yelled for the second time today.
“Hot damn, woman.” You heard Gen exclaim from behind you.
“What?” You turned around to look at her, confused.
“What the fuck do you mean, what? You look pretty good if I do
say so myself. And I do.” Gen said,
“Thanks. I feel like I
never dress up anymore. The character I
play is so laid back and wears basically Dean’s clothes all the time.” You
“So basically you’re running around in my husband’s clothes all
the time?” Daneel said, entering the trailer.
“You know it.” You winked at her. You gathered the rest of your belongings you
wanted to take and headed out the door.
“Wait a minute.” You heard from behind you.
You turned around to see Misha, Jared, and Jensen standing
there, stern looks on their faces.
“What?” You asked them.
“You’re wearing that?” Jensen asked.
“Yes?” you said, being confused as you were you posed it as a
“I don’t know.” Jared said.
“Oh my god, Dad. It’s fine.
I’m Y/AGE years old! I’m pretty sure I can handle some drinks with YOUR
wives.” You said.
“That’s just it, they’re our wives. You’re like our sister. It’s weird.” Jensen defended.
You smiled wickedly at Daneel, and then turned towards Jensen.
“You know what’s weird? I might take a man home from the bar
tonight.” You said.
“I don’t fucking think so honey.” Jared said.
“Oh, I do. Night boys.
I’ll see you lovely men in the morning.” You linked arms with Gen and Daneel
and walked away.
“Love you.” They yelled behind them to their husbands.
Once you guys got to the bar in downtown Vancouver, you just sat
there and laughed at the spectacle the guys tried to make.
“I think it’s funny that they think you’re 10 years old and need
them there to protect you.” Gen said, already pretty drunk.
“Yeah, to be honest. I’m fairly certain I could kick Jensen’s
ass. I don’t need him there to protect me.” You said. “Jared on the other hand could come in
handy. His arms are as long as my body!”
“Yes they are.” Gen said, in a rather suggestive tone.
“Ew, going to stop you there. Don’t need any details.” You said,
stumbling off the bar stool. “I’m going to get another drink. You guys want
anything.” Both ladies that still sat at
the table nodded in agreement.
You walked up to the bar and thought you recognized the guy
sitting directly in front of where you were walking. It wasn’t until you got up there you realized
that it was Zachary Levi, and you almost forgot how to breathe.
You admired this man. And of course he was hot. But more than that, he did so much for
organizations, and he is freaking hilarious.
You saw him earlier this year at Comic Con, but never did a NERD HQ
panel. You are hoping that next year you’ll be invited to do one. You almost went to the other end of the bar
when you heard your name being called.
You looked straight ahead in realized that it was Zac calling your name.
“Zac! Hey!” You said, putting as much enthusiasm into as you
He stood up and met you for a hug.
“It’s good to see you.” He said, sitting back down. You ordered your drinks and turned your
attention back to him.
“What are you doing in good ol’ Canada?” You asked him
“Getting away for a while.
Ya know, just cause.” That’s when
you remembered that he had gotten a divorce a few months back.
“Wanna come have a drink with me and my friends? They’d love to
see you again.” You said as the bartender brought over your drinks.
“Yeah, sure. Who are you here with?” He asked.
“You’ll just have to come with and find out!” You said. You told the bartender your drinks were on a
tab with your name on it, and motioned Zac to follow.
Once he got into view of the table, you could hear Gen and
Daneel both squeal.
“ZAC!” Gen screamed as she got up from the chair. She flung herself at him.
“How drunk is she?” He whispered to you.
You snickered. “Very.”
“It’s good to see you both again. How’s it going? Jensen and
Jared here?” He asked.
“Nope, girls night out.
Well, girls night and Zac night out.” Daneel said, and then laughed at
her own joke.
You couldn’t help but laugh.
Daneel and Gen talked amongst themselves for awhile and so you caught up
“The boys still treating you okay?” He asked.
“Yeah. They’re treating me good. Taking too good of care of me
sometimes.” You said, feeling at ease with him.
“What do you mean?”
You laughed, thinking of their behavior tonight.
“Well, tonight before we left, they stopped me asking me if I
were going out like that. They said
it’s weird for me to look good because I’m like a sister to them.” You said,
blushing when you realized Zac was looking you up and down.
“Well, in their defense, you do look absolutely gorgeous
tonight.” Zac said, making your heart flutter a little.
“You know what Y/N said to that?” Daneel asked.
“I can only imagine.” Was Zac’s response.
“She told them what’s weird is she might take a man home from
the bar tonight. In which Jared about
had a conniption. It was amazing.”
“Oh. MY. GOD.” Gen exclaimed. “I have the best idea ever! You should take Zac home tonight!”
And just like that you were choking on your drink.
I feel like Misha’s entire fandom is just split into two very different sides right now half of us is just like “Omg my poor baby I must comfort you do you want a hug or some blankets” and the other half is “Who the fuck did this shit wheres my fucking pitchfork it’s time for my to fuck up some sons of bitches whoever did this better watch out cause I’m fucking coming for you”