I have a dog named Misha. And a dog named Jensen. I say some weird things to them. 
“Misha, stop humping Jensen." 
"Jensen, stop following me into the bathroom." 
"I don’t care if you don’t want a bath Misha, you get in that tub right now.”
“Jensen, no. Get off the bus. You’re not allowed to go to school with me.”
“Misha, stop eating my pillow!”
“Damn it Misha, give me back my teddy bear!" 
"Misha got Jensen pregnant, dad.” (Me when I told my dad my dogs were having puppies. Jensen’s a girl. Misha’s the boy.)