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Simon: In the last show I spoke in the opening 20 minutes about an actor who I was quite obsessed with for maybe 4 to 5 years. 
Miquita: Try 6 or 7. But lie now. 
Simon: Not only that but 
in the show that was on BBC 2 I created a fictional version of him giving him a name, not dissimilar to the actor’s actual name, I then see the actual actor.
Miquita: Do you wanna say his name?
Simon: No, no. Cause I think it’s still mildly alright. 
Miquita: But you just said that you…
Simon: Hang on, let me just finish the story before you ruin my life. So I see him, in London, where he lives, and I say to him ‘Oh I feel I should maybe apologize to you’, and he said 'Oh what for’ and I said 'I just sort of mildly fictionalized you’ and he said 'Oh yeah I’ve heard about that’. So he hadn’t seen it, like what do I have to do to get you fucking attention?!

Simon Amstell: ‘The Vengabus is coming-’
Patrick Wolf: The Vengabus is coming, coming to t-
Miquita Oliver: -Coming to a town near y-
Simon: It’s not a circus or a film!
Patrick: The Vengabus is coming, boom boom boom boom, I want you in my room!
Simon: It’s a different song! 'The Vengabus is coming and everybody’s jumping!’
Patrick: We’re going to Ibiza!
Simon: Different one! You can’t just give me the whole Vengaboys back catalogue!