minion master

please tell me the girl genius universe contains a genre of overwrought not-quite-romance novels in which minions find their perfect masters and through various melodramatic and contrived situations fall in loyalty


Title: Fallen – If It Can Bleed Part Five

Characters/Pairing: Dean x Female!Reader, Sam

Word Count: 1980

Warnings: Descriptions of blood and gore, brief mentions of bodies, basically supernatural stuff.

Series Summary: The reader is a genetically enhanced assassin who’s on the run from her creator, but what will happen when she get’s taken back to the bunker by Sam and Dean? Or falls for one of the Winchesters…

Author’s Note: Wow part five, only two more to go! If you want to be tagged in the following parts of this please send me an Ask or add yourself to This List. Feedback is always appreciated, and enjoy!

If It Can Bleed: Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four

If you would like to read any of my other fics please check out my Masterlist!

*Gif is not mine, all gifs used on my blog are from Google Images.*

     The look of tongue-tied shock on Sam’s face was permanently burned into your mind.

     After getting your unique emotional responses under control – which in your case were razor sharp claws coming out to play and the urge to maul and maim – you finally had the good sense to get whatever weapons you could carry and go find Dean. Unfortunately for you, the minions of your former master were under constant control and always functioning at top efficiency – or in other words, they left no fingerprints. So when you were forced to track down Dean in a less conventional way - which just so happened to be by scent - Sam seemed to reach is breaking point for weirdness.

     He’d fidgeted the whole drive. His eyes kept flicking nervously to your still-bright-red ones. Your head had been hanging out the window like a damn dog. Apparently, getting attacked by – and consequently killing - the closest thing you had to an old friend and having your boyfriend kidnapped by a crazy lady wasn’t enough shit for one day.  This final, embarrassingly awkward blow had to top it all off.

     When Dean’s trail rushed to a stop and Sam parked the Impala you couldn’t have been more relieved.

Keep reading

Anastasia starter meme
  • “In the dark of the night terror will find her”
  • “I was once the most mystical man/woman in all of ___”
  • “I opened my eyes and the nightmare was me!”
  • “Revenge will be sweet when the curse is complete!”
  • “Soon she will feel that her nightmares are real.”
  • “My dear here’s a sign its the end of the line.”
  • “Come my minions rise for your master.”
  • “Things my heart used to know, things it yearns to remember.”
  • “Someone holds me safe and warm.”
  • “And a song someone sings, once upon a december.”
  • “Far away, long ago glowing dim as an ember.”
  • “If I can learn to do you can learn to do it.”
  • “I recall his yellow cat!”
  • “I don’t believe we told her that.”
  • “Don’t know how you knew it.”
  • “I simply knew it.”
  • “____ You’re a dream come true!”
  • “Dasvidanyia, your grace.”
  • “___ holds the key to her/his past.”
  •  “___ holds the key to your heart.”
  • “Courage don’t desert me.”
  • “Don’t turn back now that we’re here.”
  • “People say life is full of choices.. No one ever mentions fear.”
  • “I know someone’s waiting years of dreams just can’t be wrong.”
  • “I’m learning fast, on this journey to the past.”
  • “Home, love, family. There was once I time I must have had them too.”
  • “I will never be complete until I find you.”
  • “Who knows where this road may go?”
  • “Let this be a sign, let this road be mine!”
  • “Bring me home at last.”
  • “You rode horseback when you were only three.”
  • “Was I wild?”
  • “You’d behave when your father gave that look.”
  • “I feel a little foolish.”
  • “Follow in my footsteps shoe by shoe.”
  • “I never cared for stroganoff.”
  • “Pull yourself together and you’ll pull through it.”
  • “Tell yourself its easy and its true.”
  • “I hear he’s gotten very fat.”
  • “Suddenly I feel like someone new!”
  • “Unexpected, what you did to my heart.”
  • “Life is a road and I wanna keep going.”
  • “I’ll be there when the world stops turning.”
  • “At the end I wanna be standing at the beginning with you.”
  • “We were strangers on a crazy adventure.”
  • “Nothing’s gonna tear us apart.”
  • “I taught her well I planned it all, I just forgot romance.”
  • “__ how could you do this? How will we get through this?”
  • “I never should have let them dance.”
  • “She’s radiant, and confident and born to take this chance.”
  • “I found you at last.”
  • “No more pretend, you’ll be gone, thats the end.”
  • “Kind of lightheaded? Me too.”
  • “You are dressed for a ball, and you will learn to dance for one as well.”
  • “It’s 1 2 3 and I see it at a glance.”
  • “I just want to know if I belong to a family.”
  • “Soon you’ll be, home with me.”
  • “Oh? And I suppose the money doesn’t interest you either.”
  • “I am tired of being conned and lied to.”
INTJ Manual: How to Obtain Your Very Own ISTP

As an INTJ, you’re a mastermind.
A criminal mastermind.

Unfortunately, you’re more of a puppet master than a DIY sort of guy, so you’re going to need a right-hand – someone else to do your dirty work and act as the face of the organization.

Your choice: an ISTP.

Why?  As the most mysterious type, the ISTP has far more potential as a figure of respect.  You’re betting on the ISTP coolness factor as a major component in minion retention.  The ISTP poker face and generally calm demeanor will be a valuable asset in negotiations – you know they can hold their cool under pressure – and they trust no one.  Furthermore, your motor skills are weak at best, and the boss figure really ought to be able to handle a weapon.

So, INTJ, how do you go about securing yourself a nice, enigmatic ISTP?  Let’s get started.

Step #1: Hold Auditions

ISTPs are lone rangers, and not easily persuaded to consort with others.  Luckily, you don’t need to find the ISTP; let the ISTP come to you.

“Lone Ranger Reboot: Open Auditions” – or so your flier will read.

Post these fliers strategically:

  • Dōjōs
  • Near the aluminium foil in the store
  • Conspiracy Theor- I mean, Illuminati Awareness Groups’ Lodges
  • Civil War Reenactments

Step #2: The Survey

One unfortunate aspect of your ruse is that despite your efforts to target ISTPs, some actual thespians are bound to walk through the door.  How will you positively identify the ISTPs?  How will you know which ISTP is right for you?

INTJ, you need to develop a questionnaire.

This manual cannot do all the work for you, as your needs will vary depending on the nature of your nefarious plot.  One fortunate aspect of your ruse is that many of these questions will not seem out of place.  Suggested questions include:

  1. Do you prefer a boss who clearly communicates your objectives?
  2. Are you comfortable adapting to new and possibly unforeseen… developments?
  3. Do you have any experience handling firearms?
  4. Are you trained in hand-to-hand combat?
  5. How do you feel about robots replacing human interaction in the workplace?
  6. Do you find this survey in any way suspicious?

Find the ISTP who constructs a hat out of aluminium foil in response to Question 6 and explain to them that such hats are not stylish.

Then hire them.

Step #3 Convince Your ISTP To Work For You

That ISTP mistrust is a double-edged sword: it will work both for you and against you.  You hand-selected the most suspicious ISTP; now you have to convince them to work for you.  As you negotiate the terms of your contract, you may have a similar exchange with the ISTP (complete with suggested responses):

ISTP: Why should I work with you?

INTJ: For me.

INTJ: Because most of your contact with me will be limited to Bluetooth and robots.

Note: You can work the minions into the deal later.

ISTP: How can I trust you?

INTJ: You can’t.  Though, I tend to be loyal and currently have a use for you.

ISTP: Sold.


Did it work?  Congratulations!  You are now the proud owner employer of an ISTP.  Go build that diabolical empire, free to spend all of your time in the lab instead of recording your demands for billions of dollars from world governments.  That’s what the ISTP is for.  Do you think they’ll look good in a fedora?

Minions Meta

A lot of people have already noted that the Minions of Minions fame would have inevitably worked for Adolph Hitler if they hadn’t “conveniently” retired to Antarctica from the early 19th century to 1968. But in 1968 there were plenty of Napoleonic figures (mainly dictators) and similarly powerful people who sought to control others in what could be called a “villainous” fashion. Without getting too political, there were a number of world leaders killing hundreds of thousands or even millions of people the same year that the Minions chose Scarlet Overkill, a jewel thief, as Earth’s most villainous leader.

Now, this could easily be dismissed if it weren’t for the precedent that the Minions movie had already set: the Minions’ previous masters include an Egyptian pharaoh, a vampire, and Napoleon himself, all of whom definitely killed a large number of people, directly or indirectly. The Napoleonic wars alone killed between 3.5 million and 6 million people, and at the highest estimate this includes 3 million civilians. Millions of people dead. Because of the Minions. 

So was this a strategic error for the sake of a children’s movie’s plot? Perhaps. Am I overanalyzing a movie that isn’t marketed towards me? Who can say. But I have a more elaborate theory, in the same vein as the Tarantino-verse theory which claims all of his movies take place in a more violence prone Alternate Universe formed after the brutal assassination of Hitler by vengeful Jewish-American soldiers.

According to the movie, the Minions retired after the violent death of Napoleon. Napoleon, for those of you who remember high school history class, died of natural causes on the island of Helena. What kind of difference might it make to the world for one of history’s most famous military leaders to die in battle, before thousands of witnesses? Apparently a large one.

But not only did Napoleon die in battle, he was killed by a group of strange yellow creatures. Of course, the immediate reaction to Napoleon’s death would be to ascertain just who these creatures are. Scholars and world leaders would quickly find the Minions scattered throughout history, appearing in hieroglyphics, on cave walls, etc. And every time the Minions appear and choose a new leader, that leader invariably dies. Killed by their own servants. 

The minions are not human. They have apparently existed since the beginning of time. Now, what kind of conclusions would the average person draw from this in the 19th century. That the Minions are a form of Divine Intervention, of course. What other possible explanation could explain this phenomenon?

As a result, in a stunning display of the adaptability of the human race, by the end of the 19th century warfare, genocide, and dictatorships had ceased to exist. With confirmation that some higher power would judge and kill any human who dared to force their will over others, world peace was achieved. 

By 1968, the power vacuum had been filled by petty thieves and robbers who refer to themselves as “supervillains.” This is a world with events like “Villain-Con” and credited institutions like the Bank of Evil. A world where the greatest ambition of the world’s most despicable villain is to steal the Queen of England’s crown jewels. A world without war.

I haven’t seen any of the movies in this franchise.

Mini Me hard at work

Hey! Same guy from ‘Grit Points and Over Excited
Here’s another one that happened on a recent game.

Context: Same pary in a underground maze fighting against a group of dark Dwarves(?) The Paladin was sent to his knees after a brutal arrow to his sides.

Me: How does *Paladin player’s name* look like on the ground?

Paladin: Dude, what?

Me: Yeah I mean like is it possible from your position on the ground for me to help you?

Me: *to GM* Can I rush up to the Paladin and stand in front of him to try and block their line of sight of him?

GM: *stares at me for a moment* You are a Gnome…I’m pretty sure they can still see him behind you. You’ll give him a quarter or maybe half cover at best.

Me: I do that.

Table chuckles

Paladin: My hero! (OOC) Dude, you’re gonna get wrecked!

Me: I have an idea, can I get an advantage if I brace myself by leaning on his shield?

Samurai: Oh my god let him do it, its so adorable! Its like Mini Me protecting Doctor Evil!

Monk/Cleric: The bond between Minion and Master.

Paladin: How am I Doctor Evil?

GM: *grins* No advantages but I would like to see how this goes.

Me: Cool! I do that.

Paladin: *to me* Why are you not denying their claims?!

I rolled pretty high and managed to kill one guy and significantly wound two others.

Samurai: Meet Jack, MuthaFackas! *table loses it…again*

My lucky high rolls really get them excited for some reason.


❅ Marzanna Bheur;
→ Marzanna, a Baltic and Slavic goddess associated with seasonal rites based on the idea of death and rebirth of the nature; associated with winter, death, and nightmares.
→ Bheur, as in the Cailleach sometimes known as Bheur(ach) or Beira, the Queen of Winter.


Gold Saucer update (Patch 2.51) is next week (24th February)

Original Info : dengekionline.

Square Enix, MMORPG in management: in “Final Fantasy XIV Shinsei Eoruzea”, to deliver the latest update “patch 2.51” to February 24. I will tell because the information of the content of interest “Mandavu~iru Gold Saucer”, which is implemented in that patch 2.51 has arrived.

 "Mandavu~iru Gold Saucer" is, like Chocobo race and triple triad, in addition to have recorded a mini-game content that appeared in the past of “FF” series, entertainment content that play also “Shinsei FFXIV” unique game.

▲ Gold Saucer image Art

 In the Gold Saucer utilizes a special currency (Manda Ville Gold points), it is possible to exchange various items and mounted to the equipment through various games. So what kind of game is whether the play in Gold Saucer, Let’s briefly look at.

▲ of Gold Saucer map

■ Chocobo race

 Gold Saucer in to say that most of the content of interest is this “chocobo race”. Himself rode to race dedicated chocobo, and each other compete with the goal at the top.

 Chocobo in Chocobo race, to foster a different race dedicated Chocobo and buddy Chocobo. Chocobo grown to the limit becomes retired, then it can be born a new Chocobo by coupling with another chocobo. Because some genetic, such as the ability, it’s possible to grow your own chocobo.

■ Triple Triad

 Five triple triad you are utilizing the card unfolds the brain against the opponent. Other matchup with the NPC in the Gold Saucer, I make also play with the players. Triple Triad cards are prepared approximately 80 sheets initially mounting, can be obtained with such play and battle content of the NPC are to be in the streets. The number of cards that can be used in triple triad is that gradually increasing.

▲ deck made up of folks of Akatsuki clan. Have high numbers each are drawn, but seems to be fairly strong deck …….

▲ what kind of card is available, I’ll wait the implementation.

■ GATE (Gold Saucer Active Time Event)

 FATE that occur on the field (Full Active Time Event) Gold Saucer version and will become of the GATE of. GATE occurs when it comes to a specific time in various places in the hotel.

● storm! Snort Hunger

▲ in the employees who work in the Gold Saucer is that there also Yoi that has been summoned by the term experiment. Is it a winner that stood until the end on top of the stage to avoid the “snort” of its employees.

● Special Training! Dance master

▲ to Gold Saucer is also present young dancers, which aims to Urudaha society debut. And mixed with the dancers, let’s clear the challenge from the dance master.

● rescue! Minion rescue

▲ the Jabot tender and mount Correll one of the play on the stage GATE. A breakout habit Hinachokobo is will climb to the top, I became not be down.

● Gekiso! Raptor transportation

▲ leading delicate vases of Raptor transportation is a load strokes unions carry. But …… will be sniffed the bandits with them a grudge. Let Deliver the important luggage by circumvent the thieves eyes.

● follow-up! Skin changer

▲ mischievous Imp is sneaked into the hotel! Despite summoned Yoi hunter in order to eliminate the Imp, Imp is had fled garbled on Hunter. Which real thing?

■ a number of mini-games

 Various mini-games are installed on site. Just in Feel free to enjoy what you would playing carelessly while simple. Also it’s possible acquisition of Manda Ville Gold point in this mini-game.

▲ monster toss

▲ Crystal Tower striker

▲ cuff A Car

▲ Mowgli catcher

■ lottery Tender

 Lottery tender that had been done in the real events such as the Tokyo Game Show appeared in Gold Saucer! In the gold saucer can be challenge to two kinds of feel free to make “mini-lottery tender” and can large game “Jumbo lottery tender”.

▲ mini lottery tender and jumbo lottery tender. Details will enjoy at the time of implementation?

■ Introducing some of the items for me to accumulate the MGP

 When earn Manda Ville Gold point, it can be replaced with a variety of items.Here I want to introduce a part of.

● Adamantasu (mount)

▲ Near East of Sabenea Shimabara production of huge RikuHisashi-Adamantasu. As effective utilization measures Adamantasu you’ve been wild, as a result of research is advanced in Urudaha, and success in training. For very strong, it is expected as a new transportation land trade.

● Fenrir (mount)

▲ once ancient beast, horehound that was reigning in Eoruzea.While there have been believed to be already extinct, in recent years, has led to be re-discovered in deep in the Abarashia Mountains. From the heroic figure, it is called in the name of the legendary moon wolf “Fenrir”.

● gambler series (equipped)

▲ former is reminiscent of the “flying those who engage in the gambling field”, gorgeous armor set. When wearing the to feel to become a little stronger game, I wonder because of the gas.

● Bunny series (equipped)

▲ Gold cut - become the employees of the saucer, armor set of women-only. Daring fishnet stockings and chic shirt, in addition definitely cute rabbit ears would be in festive atmosphere of the place.

OKay but XF AU set in Ancient Rome… where Mulder is part of a rich and respected pagan family who loses it all due to Christianity’s uprising. Refusing to convert to keep his status, he has no choice but to disappear and ends up a slave to a stern but fair Christian master. Mulder’s master is married to a woman of science who shares her findings through her husband’s influence. Mulder discovers all the respect his master obtained for his research actually came from his “uneducated-but-ravishing” wife. He confirms his doubts when one evening he goes to her to debate her findings and she cannot stop herself from passionately disagreeing with his outrageous claims. While she can hardly believe the cockiness he displays while being a slave, she enjoys the conversation too much with someone who treats her like she is worth listening to regardless of her gender. They fall into the habit of meeting every night on the balcony after her husband retires after dinner. She listens to him and his pagan tales while he braids her long wavy hair. As a slave, he has to perform any gruelling task his master or mistress requires of him but this is is never one of them. He is always grateful when he is with her. She is merciful to his mistakes and mercy is the sole thing he should beg any God(s) for as he stands in the marble room, looking away when she comes out of her daily bath, waiting naked to be dried off by her servants. Sadly, a god answers his request one afternoon when his master and a friend to the emperor watch Mulder working outside. Impressed by his agility and his physical potential, the Emperor’s minion prompts his master to sell Mulder as a gladiator. He thought he would always despise his slave status but at least he belonged to someone. Most importantly, he belonged to her. He is sold one morning before dawn, he doesn’t tell her and she only realises as she notices the fresh flowers of the office he would pick for her every day are the same as yesterday’s. She dismisses her silent tears as melancholia rather than the loss of someone she loved more than the person sharing her bed.

His training is excruciating and his then-lanky figure is now showing strong muscles, his body marked with scars from the endless spear and glaive rehearsing fights, his face with hard features unrecognisable to his once-dreamy mind. He enters the arena at midday, his helmet shining in the sun, his palms sweaty and he thinks he might throw up in front of this huge and enthusiastic crowd, cheering so loudly he no longer questions humanity’s thirst for gruesome tragedy. It doesn’t last long. He now lies on the warm sand, his leg and right arm bleeding away, his ultimate contender’s foot on his throat, more for spectacle than necessity. Mulder can see him looking up to the crowd, his fate literally hanging from the Emperor’s verso pollice. He only hopes he will be reunited with a redhair goddess after death takes him. She is the only religion he believes in. It’s taking a lifetime. Death hasn’t come yet. His executor is confused, raising his arms up in the air while the crowd cries out for blood. Mulder shifts his neck and head, still deeply embedded in the sand. Mercy just came from a woman with titian hair and azure eyes whispering to the Emperor. She must have promised to throw him to the lions later that day. Who could resist such a request. Who could resist her really. Goddesses have always been more commanding in every way. And so he lived to see her again.


(PhotoCredit: Me, because I couldn’t find ones I liked and I just took screenshots with me phone)

Steffie’s Favorite Moments- Into the Deep

I recognize that picking probably his worst moment in this episode seems a bit odd. But I firmly believe that you can love a character more than you love any character ever, and still appreciate when he’s being a complete and total tool.

Don’t get me wrong, “You chose her and the consequences of that decision.” And the conversation via heart about Hook caring for Emma are wonderful moments, and I definitely appreciate the writers continuing to subtly hint at the romantic potential, but this episode is all about villainous Captain Hook for me.

I love all the Hook and Cora interactions to be honest. They had a fun master/minion dynamic that I really, really enjoyed.

Hook doesn’t let his ego stop him from allowing her to take the reins, he is completely at ease with his role and there are no grabs for power with their partnership. Hook actually has no interest in the power Cora seeks, power holds no appeal to him, only revenge and he is singleminded in his purpose and thus because of this, they are a very well matched pair. And for all his bravado and dramatics Killian possesses a quiet usefulness and intelligence that he employs very strategically and this comes through when he’s with Cora quite a bit.

It amuses me to no end when Cora gets all flirty with the young men around her, and I also always highly enjoy when Hook shows no fear and gives no fucks. He barely acknowledges the danger he’s in, and even though it probably would be better to lead with his possession of the heart, for his own personal safety, he goes for the dramatic suspense and even throws in some of his usual sass while he is bodily restrained and vulnerable (though he’s probably very comfortable with that position). Which is only one of the many thousands of reasons why I love him so.

It should surprise no one that Hook went back to Team Villain in this episode, he was just introduced four episodes previous and one of those was his origin story and the other he was definitively working for Team Hero, even betraying Cora’s plans to them at risk to his own life. It would have been an awful waste to have him switch to the side of good so soon, so stealing Aurora’s heart was appropriate for this part of his journey but we started with a glimpse that he could be more, that he could be better.

During my initial viewing, my heart all aflutter with Tallahassee feels, I was cursing the TV and moaning “Noooo why Killian, why?” But years later I have such an appreciation for these villainous moments because they contrast so nicely with the heroic ones.

For the same reason I love the conversation about the rings in 5.08, I love villainous Captain Hook in season 2. Nothing he does is irredeemable, after all if we can be told to forgive all of Regina’s crimes we can certainly give him a pass on some fairly light by comparison transgressions in the early days.

I think an early switch to the light side would have cheapened the impact of his later decisions to be a better man, and how far he’s come. He actually has to BE a villain before he can come back from it after all, and this scene is him doing just that. This scene is him doing something awful to benefit himself, and further his own goals despite the consequences, because he had a taste of hero life and it was all bitter betrayal on the top of a beanstalk.

All my favorite moments