me: *uses slang*

some daft person: see, you don’t know how to speak properly

me, an intellectual: Actually, I fully grasp the concept of colloquial language, something which you don’t seem to understand; my level of education has nothing to do with my verbal pattern. Hence, I can go from a highly articulated manner of speech – as I am displaying now – to ‘man door hand hook car door’ in the space of a sentence, you abhorrent philistine.