favorite character meme → [5/6] quotes ↳ take it. what’s the matter? i thought i taught you how to use a sword. “i refuse. I’m not going to use my hands for such a thing. my hands are only for cooking.”
17. “I-I’m… I’m trying to change into what I thought you would like… Did it work…?” :)
It happens when they’re in the crowded streets of Leeds on the
day of the pride parade. Robert’s clammy hand slips from Aaron’s and flies to
his chest, clutching at the front of his shirt like it’s suddenly too tight.
Quick to recognise what’s happening, Aaron takes Robert’s arm and leads him
into the nearest shop, away from the great mass of rainbow clad people that
move as one. A staff member gives them a funny look as they stumble through the
doors of H&M, but chooses to ignore them when Robert clasps his knees and
starts hyperventilating. Aaron rubs a spiral into his back, trying to offer
whatever words he can to ease Robert through the panic attack.
‘It’s okay,’ Aaron says. ‘Just breathe.’
‘You can’t breathe?’
‘No. I can’t do this. I can’t be proud.’
Aaron’s heart cracks at the fearfulness of Robert’s voice.
This is supposed to be a celebration.
‘I just wanted you to be proud of me,’ Robert breathes. ‘I-I’m…
I’m trying to change into what I thought you would like… Did it work…? Sorry.
Of course it didn’t. I’m a mess.’
Aaron crouches down in front of Robert. He thought that he wanted to do this. He thought he was ready. Aaron wasn’t bothered about
coming to pride – it had never really been his thing – but when Robert had
suggested it he couldn’t say no. He thought it was Robert embracing himself,
opening himself up to the world.
He was wrong.
‘I am proud of you,’ Aaron says, cupping Robert’s face in
his hands. ‘I’m so proud of you. You don’t have to pretend for me. If you’re
not ready, you’re not ready, and that’s okay.’
Hi, sorry I’ve been gone for a hot minute.
Things are happening, had a brief straight scare with a male human being, don’t worry though. We are back to gay and safe now.
How are you guys? Did you forget about me?