“Just when I think I could have a decent conversation with you. We’re done here!”

*Chuckles* “I’ll bring Beau around 3PM.”

“You and your stallion dare come this side of the fence.”

“Willow ain’t gonna hold up against Beau’s charms… just as her owner can’t resist mine for too long.”

“If I get my hands on you…”

“I’m counting the moments for just that, baby.”

Annoying the Head of the HOA

A friend of mine not too long ago painted his house. He lives in a development that has an HOA. He admits that he and his wife made the first mistake by not reading the HOA handbook close enough so they didn’t realize they had to get the color approved by the HOA.

On the first day of painting, the head of the HOA stopped by and talked to them, made small talk, talked about ways to make painting the house easier etc. At this time the HOA head knew they hadn’t gotten the color approved because he sits on the three-person panel that approves the colors, however, he opted not to say anything to them. Instead, he waited until they had the entire house painted then told them the color was not approved because there too many other houses with a similar color (it was a lighter shade of green).

So, faced with having to spend the time and money to repaint the entire house, he and his wife decided to get a little revenge. They submitted the form and color swatch for the new color and were approved. Knowing the panel had to take time out of their lives to meet every time they submit a color, they decided to submit another color swatch and form saying that they had changed their minds. This color was one they knew would never be approved. As assumed, it was denied. They had to submit again and again they submitted a color they knew would never be approved. Again, they were denied. They repeated this 4 or 5 times before the HOA head contacted them and told them the first swatch they submitted was still approved and not to submit another swatch for approval, they were tired of playing games. He replied telling him that it turns out that color is no longer available and they needed to submit one last swatch, which, of course, was a color that they knew would not be approved. This time the HOA told them if they submitted another un-approvable swatch they would be fined and billed for the panel’s time. He submitted another swatch that was a color he knew would never be approved and with it a photocopy of the page from the handbook covering the process of getting a color approved. He pointed out that there was nothing in there that mentioned any limit to a number of swatches a person could submit.

This entire process took a few months. After 8 or 9 swatches that were denied, the head of the HOA was fuming mad and showed up at their door telling them he wasn’t leaving until they had decided on a color for the house. My friend pointed out that the handbook says the only way for a color to be approved was with a vote from the full panel. The HOA head called the other two people, they came over, and once they were all sat down he and his wife shuffled through about 10 different swatches of crazy colors before finally showing them one that was a light green color. Frustrated, they approved it and left.

A few weeks later, the head of the HOA contacted him to see when they were going to paint and he told them they already had. The swatch that they had approved was the color the house was already painted. A week later he got an angry letter from the HOA and a bill for their time. He refused to pay and will fight it. A couple weeks after that everyone got a revised handbook in the mail with very detailed rules on how to get a color approved. My friend then called the head of the HOA and told him all of this could have been avoided if he had just said something that day when he came over and talked to them as they started painting, but he decided to be a dick, so they decided to be dicks back to him.

TL;DR - HOA head is a jerk to my friend so he and his wife get petty revenge by driving the HOA head and the paint color approval committee crazy.

Edit - Well, this has blown up unexpectantly. Apparently, HOA’s are a point of anger for a lot of people. Just a few follow-ups:


I’m no expert on the lien/fine situation and how that all plays out. I was just going off something I was told. Apparently, if he doesn’t pay the fine they can file a lien against him and they could foreclose on his house. When I told him this he explained that the handbook actually had a detailed procedure on how fines are to be handed out and collected. There are apparently a few steps the HOA has to take before they will file a lien and none of those have happened yet. The fine is $300 so if it escalates to the next step and they try to collect the money he will take action even if that means swallowing his pride and paying. He is going to double check just to make certain they haven’t tried to file the lien on the sly.


A lot of people are wondering how an HOA comes to be and why anyone would move into one. To make it short, the idea of an HOA is a good one. They help make sure the community stays nice and property values stay up so you don’t have neighbors that move in, never cut their grass, have three broken down cars and a couch in their front yard and constantly throw loud parties, driving down your property values. They also often have community-wide benefits like a pool, workout room, etc. The problem is that some people get the slightest bit of power and it goes to their head and they turn into assholes. Based on the replies I have seen here, that seems to happen quite a bit. There are good HOA’s. My brother lives in a place that has one that he has nothing but good things to say about, but it seems like there are many that are bad and go too far.

Watch your heart!

Bradycardia (slow heartbeat) is a common problem with restrictive eating disorders. Normal range is 60-100 beats per minute, and if you’re under 60, it’s too slow.

Mine was at 58bpm. I ate just now, and it’s gone up to 88bpm.

I mean, I wanna panic because I just had 500 calories of pancakes and cheese, but at least I’m not afraid that my heart is going to stop.

Jeonghan; ideal type and kinks

Requests: Hey! The post on Jun’s ideal type and kinks was great and I was wondering if you have one for Jeonghan?

ideal type and kinks for jeonghan? <33

Remember that everything is based on my opinion!

  • oh boi this one is gonna be hard
  • the angel devil of seventeen huh ;)))
  • hehehh jk i love jeonghan
  • ok so, his ideal type
  • i think he’ll be more strict on this side
  • i think he’ll want someone older to take care of him??? and i think he likes sexy ones
  • and someone who’ll suit him well
  • he would flirt 24/7 so it will be good for him if his partner flirts back all the time too
  • and of course, it’s a must for his partner to listen to the group’s music and support them
  • he likes to annoy the people he loves (that’s kinda his way of showing his affection mine too) so he would poke and annoy and joke with his s/o
  • but he does it out of love so he would be happy if his partner doesn’t take him seriously :’)
  • so i think this is pretty much it for his ideal type
  • and now, let’s move onto the kinks
  • and he would probably try out everything
  • from positions to toys, bdsm and costumes
  • i think he loves soft bondage (you know these light lingerie sets and handcuffs and soft blindfolds) just enough so his partner can’t touch him and let him do everything and also enough to not hurt his s/o
  • it’s a big turn on for him not letting his partner touch him and let him pleasure them
  • he’s also very dirt minded
  • by that i mean he’s really perverted and will also do things such as masturbate to his s/o photos and selfies when they aren’t around
  • weakness-ass and thighs
  • especially aSS
  • he’ll do everything to bend you over his knee and spank you, leaving red bruises on it so he can look at them later and think “oh, she/he’s mine”
  • and not only during sexy time, he’ll regularly grab it or squeeze it haven’t we all seen pics and videos how he touches the members’ asses all the time lmao
  • he’ll also always grab onto the thighs while thrusting inside you
  • also one of his biggest weakness will be mutual masturbating
  • like he’ll set up a rule like “not touching each other ok”
  • and make you lay in front of him and touch yourself while he does the same
  • and make you look into his eyes as you cum
  • but he’ll probably not keep this rule and end in a great sex most of the time
  • but if he wants to tease or get jealous over something, he’ll definitely keep it
  • oK SO I THINK THIS IS ALL FOR HIM ahh i love him he’s such an angel <33 and a devil sometimes lmao
More Zoot. Mermaid Au idea

Nick hates other predatory fish/mer-mammal like barracudas and especially sharks. 

Nick: What’s so great about sharks. Everyone thinks they’re so badass! With their dozens of sharp teeth! I have dozens of sharp teeth too and mine are more intimidating! And anglers can swallow prey whole that is twice their own size! We can eat about anything that we want! I don’t see sharks doing that! They even get their own stupid theme song, why don’t anglers have a theme song!?

He also enjoys watching shark movies when he’s at Ben’s beach house with Judy. Because he loves when the sharks get killed. Especially in Deep Blue Sea and Jaws when the shark at the end gets blown up.

Plus he loves that Skye is a shark hunter! XD and loves eating the shark meat!

A few years ago I took a Wilderness First Responder (EMT’s for outdoors basically) class and it was my turn to be a victim, so the instructor gave me this really wicked and dramatic looking head wound. It was a huge gash across my forehead, over my nose and down my cheek, fake blood everywhere, matted hair and everything. It was incredibly realistic.

So I took a photo, naturally, and sent it to a couple friends. Unfortunately, one of those friends was a dude that I had a raging crush on and I wasn’t able to send any kind of explanation text because I got called to get with the program. So I set my phone down and got on with class, I came back like 40 minutes later to several texts like “please tell me that’s fake,” because I’m also prone to real and severe injuries that I also just photograph and send my friends (with explanations though, so they’re more like “haha look what my dumb ass did this time”)

I ended up having a mini panic because I AM NOT that person that just sends those weird “I’m not ok” texts, or creates weird situations where I allude to not being ok and making the other person feel obligated to ask what’s going on (I hate that shit tbh). So I ended up texting something like IM SO SORRY ITS TOTALLY FAKE I MEANT TO SAY IT WAS FAKE I GOT INTERRUPTED IM SO SORRY I BOTHERED YOU

And sometimes I wonder if he ever remembers that

anonymous asked:

imagine the "too-short-to-reach-that-book-they-want" AU and Jake happens to be there looking for comics and sees Amy tryna reach a book on the top shelf and he watches her for a while until he can't stop laughing and reaches it for her and she's grumpy that he didn't help her sooner and awwwww


amy being super flustered and trying her damn hardest to get this book

she’s so competitive that she will. not. let any of the librarians help her get it down 

she’s so intent on doing it herself and jake is on the other side of the room just looking at the comics and he only looks up when he hears her say “no thanks, i’ve got this” for the umpteenth time and he just stands there snickering a little 

she doesnt even notice she’s so intent on getting this book 

jake starts inching closer, looking at books and pretending that he’s interested but he really isn’t (who is george orwell anyway) 

and he gets to where amy is and he just reaches up right next to her and grabs the book next to the one he wants and she glares him down and he just deadpans and he’s trying so hard not to grin but also she’s the most beautiful person he’s ever seen 

and he’s just like “yeah yeah i know, you’ve got this” and shrugs and begins to walk off 

but amy’s just a little bit enchanted (just the tiniest bit. not even the tiniest bit. she just hates him. oh my gosh shut up amy’s head she doesn’t like him go away) and she calls him back when he reaches the stairs 

and he’s grinning and he gets the book for her but he’s laughing all the time and he knows damn well that she’s into him but he’s into her too so he’s trying to be lingering and sexy but he just kind of stretches really slowly and makes himself look like an idiot 

anonymous asked:

the ask about allergies & stuff- i just found that so relatable, because when i was a young child i was lactose intolerant and cried ALL THE TIME until i was given soy milk, and i was the only one of the children to have this (i'm no longer lactose intolerant lol) and now i'm like. getting a professional diagnosis? this is so funny to me lol

Hello allergy buddy! I grew out of mine too! (though now I think I’m developing new ones lol). I’m glad they were able to figure things out for you as a kid! It’s so hard constantly dealing with the symptoms of intolerances when you don’t know what’s going on. 


anonymous asked:

That’s the thing many people cannot seem to differ. Saying someone is handsome/pretty, does not automatically imply that you’re attracted to them? Friends of mine and me, too, often say how pretty my brother is and how he will be even more handsome when he is a grown up. And there‘s no more meaning behind it than that. The same statement applies to Finn, still doesn’t mean that I’m attracted to a kid if I say „He is very pretty“.

Don’t over think it too much, there’s nothing wrong with that! Don’t stress !