mine-my-own-my-precious

Tolkien characters as memes
  • Me, an intellectual: Gandalf, Elrond
  • She is beauty, she is grace, she will punch you in the face: Éowyn, Lúthien, Legolas (let's be honest xd)
  • The dress: Galadriel (is she blue and black or is she white and gold?)
  • I came out to have a good time and honestly I'm feeling so attacked right now: Bilbo, Déagol (ha. ha.), Túrin (ha. ha. ha.)
  • *shoving breadsticks into the purse*: Turgon
  • okay... that sounds fake but okay...: Thranduil, Manwë
  • perfect men don't exis-: Aragorn, Éomer, Faramir, literally hALF OF THE CHARACTERS HAVE YOU READ LOTR
  • don't talk to me or my son ever again: um, Fëanor??? and like, all Fëanorians and their sons and the sons of their sons what even is this family???
LOTR fandom vs Silmarillion fandom

LOTR fandom:

- elves are so pure and innocent
- Sauron is the bad guy
- gay ships everywhere
- 99% of memes include Legolas
- “why couldn’t the eagles-”

Silmarillion fandom:

- elves’ killing spree
- everybody loves Mairon
- gay ships everywhere except they’re 10 times more intense and there’s 10 times more of them
- 99% of memes include Feanorians
- 5-hour-long lectures on “why couldn’t the eagles-”

6

                           Casual pointless Mirkwood appreciation post.

Geek Cred?

Today had a conversation at work with a customer that went like this: 

Dude:  "Yeah, well, I have this silly app on my phone.“ 
Me:  "Oh?”
Dude:  "It’s not a game, it’s well, do you know Lord of the Rings?“
Me:  "Yeah?”  
Dude:  "The app.  It’s an Elvish translator so I can translate English to Elvish.“ 
Me:  "Oh, cool.  Quenya or Sindarin?”
Dude:  "…..*silent*….“
Me:  ”…*?*…“
Dude:  "OMG NO FUCKING WAY.”
Dude:  "Can I marry you?“
Me:  "Only if you give me the one ring." 
Dude:  "But it’s mine.  My own.  My precious." 
Me:  "One does not simply propose to a tech goddess." 
Dude:  ”*sighs* I would have followed you … my captain…my queen.“ 
Me:  "Be at peace, son of Android." 
Dude:  ”….no really.  Can I marry you?“ 

2

The White Lady,” he murmured. “She is called a wise-woman, a healer. And yet… she sees to the center of a man, and can turn his soul to ashes, if evil be found there.”  - "Jesus H. Christ,“ I said, turning back to Jamie. "Did you ever hear of La Dame Blanche?” - "Um? Oh? Oh, aye, I've… heard the stories.“ 


"To a point, you know, it doesn’t  matter,” he said. “Whatever else you may be or whatever information you may possess, you have one invaluable attribute as a houseguest.”  - “And what’s that?” I demanded. He paused, hand on the bell, and smiled. “You’re Red Jamie’s wife,” he said softly. “And he is fond of you, my dear, is he not?”

Diana Gabaldon, Dragonfly in Amber