mine mine mine all mine so happy

I will never forget her eyes.

Those dark brown irises could warm the hearts of the saddest souls. They could lift the spirits of a person with a simple glance. Behind those orbs was a particularly seductive happiness. It drew in everyone around her, like a charm. Those eyes made me feel alive. They gave me hope and heartache. They were as enchanting as they were misleading. They made my life seem worth living, for a time. But I learned the hard way that those eyes, so full of life and love, quickly sucked all of the joy out of mine. As your eyes burned brighter, with the intensity of a red giant, mine became colder. As your eyes held an irresistible jubilance, mine held a sunken stare. As your eyes felt exhilarating to stare into, mine felt depressive and hopeless.

I will never forget her eyes,

But I have forgotten mine. Long gone are the days of happiness, with a twinkle in my iris and a smile on my face. The ecstasy of your eyes left me overdosed. And I have been trying to fix the withdrawal ever since.

Offer to the Robron Fandom

So, starting tonight, things are going to be really bloody difficult for our favourite boys, and there’s no doubt at all that some episodes are going to be….really hard to watch.

I know so many of us (myself included) have latched onto Robron in a big way, and so many of us identify with the boys, and seeing Aaron in prison, suffering abuse, and potentially even drug abuse, is going to be pretty triggering for some people.

So what I’m offering is this. If you want me to, I’m more than happy to watch the episodes (not just tonight, but over the coming weeks/months - the entire duration of this storyline) and then give you a message telling you whether you should avoid watching it or not (or at least, if you’re having a bad day, I can tell you to wait until you’re feeling a bit better before watching the episode/scenes).

I’m already going to do this for another friend here, and I’d be happy to do this for anyone else. Even if we haven’t spoken before, even if we don’t follow each other - it doesn’t matter. Just give me a message and I can make sure I PM you after the episodes and give you an idea of how heavy/intense they are.

I think it’s so important for everyone to look out for each other. I know a lot of what will happen in these episodes will be revealed in gifsets and written posts, but that’s not the same as watching it on screen, hearing the words and seeing exactly what’s going down.

This storyline is going to contain physical/verbal abuse, potential drug abuse, mentions of pedophilia, homophobia (no doubt), and I wouldn’t be surprised if Aaron self-harms again. This is going to be seriously triggering for a lot of people, for any of those reasons, and I want people to still feel safe and still be able to watch the show as a whole and enjoy the storyline as much as they can.

So please, please, please feel free to message me. You don’t have to tell me why you’re concerned, or why it might be triggering or upsetting to you. I can either give you brief details of what happens in the episodes or I can just quickly say “I wouldn’t watch if you’re having a bad day”. Like it doesn’t have to be a big deal, but it could be important.

I know some people may well need this, or they may have already asked other fandom friends to do this for them. But I also know some people might feel silly or embarrassed to ask someone, or are not sure who to ask, and I just want you to know you can ask me. It’s honestly no bother at all, and I’d be happy to do it if it’s going to help put people’s minds at ease.

So starting from tonight, this offer is open. Please please PLEASE feel free to message me - I won’t ask any questions. I’ll just add your name to a list and that will be that. Job done. And you’ll get a little message after the episode/s air.

If people could help spread the word, or want to reblog this and offer themselves up to do this too, that would be awesome. This fandom is so lovely and I’ve seen several posts of people sounding concerned for what’s to come, and I just want you to all feel safe!

This post in short: if you want me to watch Emmerdale and PM you after the episodes air to warn you about their content/let you know whether it’s safe to watch, please let me know and I’ll be happy to do that for you.

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.
We throw around the word never likes its nothing but a small rose petal. The word never is a doubled edged sword. On one side it says ‘I will never leave you’ and on the other it says ‘I will never love you.’
—  The Word Never
Looking back, I can’t remember the truth. I blew everything out of proportion so I could feel the hurt and betrayal and write about it in vivid detail. It was my own method of torture. My own undoing; and I enjoyed every second of it.
—  c.j.n.

if vicchan’s own version of a katsudon™ as yuuri’s birthday present isn’t the purest thing ever then idk what else is