I wish I could’ve lifted the car but I just couldn’t and I tried so hard but he kept screaming and I was so useless besides calling 911 and talking him through the pain. I just want him to be okay. I’ll push him in a wheelchair for the next 7 months or 3 years or the rest of his life or I’ll get him all the ice he ever asks for and buy him lunch whenever his tummy grumbles I don’t even care I just want him to feel 0 pain and stress rn. He stopped me from drowning myself yesterday and this just hurts so bad. He’s too nice to experience bad things. I wish I could take all the pain in the lower half of his body and absorb it into mine so that he’d feel relief. Gosh what do I even tell his mom when I see her. I hope she doesn’t blame me. I reek of smoke.