Who broke the coffee pot? I'm not mad, I just want to know.
I did. I broke it.
No. No you didn't. GHB?
Don't look at me, look at Dualscar.
What?! I didn't break it!
Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?
Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken!
No, it's not!
If it matters, probably not... Mindfang was the last one to use it.
Liar! I don't even drink that crap!
Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Redglare!
Okay, let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Condy.
No! Who broke it!?
Condesce, Darkleer's been awfully quiet this whole time.
(Camera pans to the Condesce)
I broke it. It burned my hand, so I punched it. I predict that ten minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
What if the alpha trolls raised the dancestors and the beta trolls.
So, the Condesce sitting on a throne with her trident sitting across her lap while trying to glare menacingly at one of her subjects and then a little Fef and a little Meenah come running into the room screaming ‘Mama!!’ and she ignores them so Meenah climbs the throne and starts braiding little bits of her hair while Fef is just kinda hanging on the trident and then the Condesce is just trying to focus on the person talking to her but she can’t and eventually she just gives the guy whatever he wants so she can go play with her girls without looking soft in front of her people.
And a very exasperated Dualscar with little Eridan and Cronus sitting on his lap while Eridan talks all about his new friend Feferi and how they went swimming with her lusus and made a beach fort out of Faygo bottles and Cronus just sits there swinging his legs around and humming 50s music under his breath.
Then the Grand Highblood coming back to the hive to Gamzee with both hands wrist deep in his recupracoon scooping out the slime into little mini pie tins and Kurloz doodling pictures of him and Meulin and muttering under his breath about ‘his little kitty cat’ and just turning around and going back to paint some more.
Darkleer trying to gently clean his bow and having Equius come up next to him and say ‘what’s this’ before wrapping his little hand around and snapping it in half; while Horuss is off in the corner doing gog knows what with some wires and a picture of a hoofbeast, then calling Equius for help.
Mindfang out shopping with Aranea and Vriska, trying to keep them by her side but Aranea keeps running off to the book store and Vriska keeps wandering to where there’s spiders incased in amber and things like that.
Redglare trying to teach Latula and Terezi about law and order and all that jazz, while Terezi refuses to take off her dragon hood and Latula is completely gone (aka out skateboarding with Mituna) which results in angry pestering of the Psiionic and Latula’s skateboard being taken away, only to find it, and Latula, gone the next morning as per usual.
The Dolorossa being busy with the grubs and not seeing much of Kanaya and Porrim, Kanaya doesn’t really care and takes up a lot of solo activities like sewing, gardening, and reading, but Porrim craves touch and contact so when she gets sick of being a mannequin for yet another dress, she will go down to the breeding caverns where the Dolorossa finds her curled up in a pile of Cerulean grubs.
The Disciple sitting down with Meulin and Nepeta and teaching them how to draw and telling them all about quadrants and shipping, while also making sure they understand that even though the caste system is still in place, their blood status does not make them worth less than any highblood, which is why Nepeta became so close with Equius and Meulin was in the flushed quadrant with Kurloz.
The Signless sitting down with Karkat and Kankri and trying to get them to stop fighting long enough to imbue in them a sense of self worth and pride, regardless of their mutation, which doesn’t work because once Kankri finally shuts up Karkat gets mad and storms off which is why Karkat is afraid of his blood status and Kankri isn’t, because Kankri actually listened to the Signless (“do not worry Kankri, he’ll listen when he is ready”).
The Psiionic putting Sollux and Mituna down for a nap and trying to watch some tv, but he loses track of time and falls asleep, then wakes up to Sollux and Mituna using their psionics to change the channel back and forth and screaming at each other about it, but Mituna gets mad and walks out with his skateboard, so Sollux sits up on the couch next to Psii with this satisfied smirk, and Psii just rolls his eyes and goes to take a real nap in his recupracoon.
The Summoner on the phone with Mindfang, while Tavros and Rufioh play fiduspawn, but there’s this loud crash because one of the monsters got loose and the Summoner saying “uh…uh….I have to go….the boys let another Spike-Snouted Pygmy Dragon loose in the hive” and after Mindfang says something sarcastic, he turns around to see an apologetic looking Tavros twisting his hands around and trying to hide a broken mug while Rufioh cuddles with the pygmy dragon and he just cracks a smile because of his little dorks.
The Handmaid would be in Lord English’s service so she wouldn’t be around much, so Damara and Aradia spend most of their time with the Leijons and occasionally the Zahhaks; but when The Handmaid is around, they watch a lot of anime (subtitles, not dub, just for Damara) and horror movies for Aradia and they cuddle and speak Japanese and just be a loving family because they never get the chance to do it.