How to make a long distance relationship last
A long distance relationship (otherwise known as LDR) isn’t for everyone and it really takes work from both parties. When I look back on my 2 ½ year long distance relationship there were some things that played a vital role in keeping the relationship healthy and exciting. So I’ve decided to create a list of my LDR tips.
1. COMMUNICATE- The most important part of any relationship is communication but with an LDR it takes a lot more work and is more meaningful. Why? Well it’s really easy to go a day or two without speaking to someone when you are able to see them on a regular basis. Communication should occur as often as possible even if it’s via text. When my husband and I first started talking we spoke every second of the day and would even lose sleep just to talk to each other. Okay.. Maybe we were a bit extreme and we’ve toned down since but what’s important is you make time to talk. None of this-“I’m gonna wait until he texts me” or “I’m too busy to contact her today” excuses. The reason communication is especially important for an LDR is because you cannot provide your partner with the same type of attention you would if you were physically there. All you have is communication, really.
2- MAKE PLANS- What are you going to do the next time you see each other? After all, time is a valuable thing to waste. Making plans can really help keep the relationship exciting because it gives you and your partner something more to look forward to. You also don’t get the opportunity to experience doing things together on a regular basis and it’s important you make this time to do those things when you see each other. Plans could be going to the movies, museum, dinner dates, zoo, ice skating, etc. My husband and I made a bucket list together and actually accomplished most of what was on the list.
3- SET GOALS- Where do you see this relationship going in a couple of months? Years? If you’ve just started dating you probably don’t have long term relationship goals because you are just getting to know each other. Once you’ve established a serious relationship it’s important to figure out where it is headed and when the distance will come to an end. If you need to finish school before then or have to move, you’ve got to start preparing for that.
4- GET SUPPORT- If you don’t have a friend or family member to support your LDR it’s important to find someone who does. There are plenty of support blogs & groups, especially for military relationships on social media sites including tumblr, wordpress, and Facebook. Even though I had many people who supported our relationship I found useful information from these Facebook groups. I had no idea what to expect dating someone in the military and had a lot of questions that no one I knew could answer.
5- BE INDEPENDENT- Just because you are in an LDR doesn’t mean you have to sit by your phone and wait for them to call you. One of the best ways to handle distance is to keep yourself busy and have a life of your own. This may mean going out with your friends, working, or going to school to better your career.