Logan is one of those people that never re-reads anything unless it’s to look up a specific fact. Once he’s read a novel, he’s like ‘why would i read something I’ve already read when there’s so much out there yet to read and I already know what happens?’. Meanwhile Patton will re-read things over and over again because nostalgia.
Patton will slip into ASL/PSE to emphasize his points sometimes ( “no”, “thank you”, “stop”, etc.). Virgil has picked up some of these habits from him.
now, if/when Virgil’s anxiety sends him into nonverbal communication, he and Patton can have simple conversations in ASL
Roman has a fluffy, warm dark red bathrobe
Virgil taught Patton to make macarons. It took them half the night, but Patton cherishes that memory quite a bit. Virgil will never admit it, but it meant a lot to him too.
Roman sings to himself to calm himself down. One time Patton found him an emotional wreck on the floor of his room and sang Disney songs softly as he held him until Roman fell asleep in his arms.
When Virgil is feeling on-edge, sometimes he’ll paint on his arms. The coolness of the paint and the feeling of the brushes against his skin is calming for him, and focusing on painting something helps distract him when he needs it.
Logan has different kinds of anger and they are clear in his tone of voice. The Sides unanimously think his “Protective Anger” is the scariest, because it is sharp, cold, and usually in a lethal calm. (It’s never been directed at them, always in defense of them)
Logan is usually the one who helps Patton clean up after dinner, but sometimes Roman or Virgil will join them.
Logan isn’t always good at reading body language. Sometimes he’ll ask Patton questions while they’re alone together, and Patton is more than willing to help explain things.
i.e. “Patton, I noticed today that Virgil was wearing his hood up more than usual. But the mindscape is always a very comfortable temperature. Do you know why he might choose to wear his hood up despite no apparent weather concerns?” “Well, sometimes the hood helps him feel more protected and safe if he’s having a particularly rough day.” “Ah. That is very helpful information. I will keep that in mind for future instances.”
Virgil will defend canon!Hades from the pop-culture!Hades like none other. (Logan is more than happy to help provide solid fact-checking and sources to help in his defenses)
Roman and Logan debate about Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. A lot. Sometimes these debates get very heated.
Patton wears his cat hoodie on Really Bad Days. On those days, the other Sides have learned to be extra gentle with Patton and to check in with him occasionally. Sometimes this ends with a giant cuddle puddle. Other times it ends with giving him space and making sure he eats and knows they’re there to listen if he wants to talk.
All of the Sides love falling asleep to Logan read, but only Logan knows that this is something the other three have in common.
Some rarely-mentioned signs that parents are abusive
I see a lot of lists of things that abusive parents do. But some things I have never seen in a list so far and I would like to add them, because according to the other lists, I’ve never experienced abuse from my parents. But just because it doesn’t appear on a standard list doesn’t mean it’s not abuse, so here is an addendum.
I think most of these points are specific for kids who are disabled, mentally ill or neurodivergent, and that this is the reason why they never appear on other lists. But these kids are especially vulnerable to (emotional) abuse, so I made this.
1. Shaming you for your disabilities, mental illness or neurodivergency. This includes undiagnosed conditions. If a parent sees that their child is having problems, they should try to help or, if they can’t, get external help.
It is not okay for parents to shame you for self-harming.
It is not okay for parents to shame you for having meltdowns.
It is not okay for parents to shame or punish you for things you cannot help, no matter how hard it is for them.
Yes, if parents do honestly have no clue what is happening, they might misinterpret your (re)actions. But no later than when they talk with you about it, they should eventually realize that you’re not doing it on purpose. Parents can and should get help from others and/or professionals if it’s too much for them.
2. Shaming you for mistakes. People make mistakes. Inexperienced people make more mistakes. Young people are by definition inexperienced. Especially those of us who are mentally ill, neurodivergent or intellectually disabled, (but really literally everyone) is bound to make mistakes while growing up.
You might not know that there is a difference between cleaning agents and shower gel. You might not know that lotion isn’t good for a potted plant. You might now know that there is a reason why the cat is in that cage. You might think that something is a good and harmless trick but it actually has really bad consequences.
You might not know these things even if everyone else your age does. It’s not your fault.
It’s okay for parents to be angry, disappointed or shocked. It’s not okay for parents to let it out on you. It’s their job to teach you and if they didn’t do it correctly, it’s not your fault.
(For example, I didn’t know that cleaning agents and shower gel are different things until I was 18. As a little child, I was told to stay away from cleaning agents and not to touch them and I was never told otherwise, so I just accepted that until I was taught otherwise by someone else.)
3. Breaking promises. This sounds vague, I know. And I know that sometimes promises can’t be held. Sometimes they are forgotten. Sometimes even parents don’t have the energy to keep up their end of the bargain. It happens.
But if it’s a constant pattern, if you are coerced into doing things you don’t like by promises that will never be held, it’s not okay any more.
4. Threats. It’s one thing to explain to a child or teen the consequences of their actions. It’s okay to explain that you need to study or else you will fail your tests and it’s okay to explain what happens then.
It’s not okay to threaten you with grave consequences for minor failures. It’s not okay to remind you of these consequences every time you do something wrong. It’s not okay to keep threatening you when you are unable to do whatever it is they want you to do.
5. Threatening you with things that should not be threats. It’s not okay to threaten a child or teen with doctor’s appointments, hospitals, psychotherapy or psychiatry. These things are supposed to help. You should not grow up to be afraid of needing a doctor or a therapist.
Seriously, instead of a parent threatening their child with psychiatry, they should just go there and try to get help for the whole family because it’s probably desperately needed.
6. Sudden and unjustified punishments. It’s not okay to suddenly punish you for something that has previously been okay.
If parents are fed up with their children’s behaviour, they should establish rules and explain and justify punishments, and give their children a chance to actually comply (while also considering their children’s abilities).
(For example, as a teen I never helped with housework. I didn’t have the executive functioning and I never got taught how to do it. But suddenly I was punished for not helping with housework.)
7. Unpredictability. It’s not okay to suddenly change the rules without warning.
It’s not okay if it’s “You should go out more often” one day and “No you are not allowed to go out” the next.
Some parents have trouble offering a constant reliability due to their own illness/disability/neurodivergence. It happens.
But the moment it makes you as their child afraid of their reactions, afraid that they might have a sudden change of heart, it’s not okay any more.
8. Assuming bad intentions where there are none. As I already said, people make mistakes. People even make stupid mistakes. People misjudge, miscalculate, people lose their temper. This happens to parents as well as to their children and everyone else.
What is not okay is for parents to see you doing something wrong and immediately assuming you’re doing it to harm them.
(For example, I always stayed up late. My parent had trouble sleeping. When I made too much noise, they assumed it was intentional in order to deny them their sleep.)
9. “I want you to do the thing but I also want you to want to do the thing.” This is a tricky one, but I have heard this from so many people that I’m including it as an extra point. I think it’s actually some sort of double bind, because you can only do it wrong or do it wrong in a different way.
It’s okay for parents to demand their children do things they do not like, for example doing chores, doing homework and similar things. (However, it’s not okay to demand more than you can actually do.)
It’s okay for parents to ask their children to do them a favour, for example sometimes do a little more housework, helping them with other stuff, going to the store and so on.
It’s okay for you to not want to do something. It’s okay to do something even if you don’t want to. Actually, most favours work that way, you rarely ever like them but you do them anyway because you want to do something for someone else. Most chores work that way. Almost nobody likes doing the dishes.
However, it’s not okay to make you feel bad for doing something anyway. If you don’t like doing something, you don’t like it, and nobody has the right to demand you to feel differently about it.
10. Making you feel bad for opening up to them. If you tell a parent about your experiences, your feelings, your problems and your secrets, they should be accepting and loving.
Punishing you for things they would have never known if you hadn’t told them is wrong. Shaming you for things they would have never known if you hadn’t told them is wrong. It’s a parent’s job to offer their child emotional support. It’s wrong for them to show you that you can’t trust them.
okay so imagine that after ransom, holster, and lardo graduate they’re like “okay so where do we live now” and like holster and ransom already agreed that they were going to move in together after college while ransom gets his medical degree and they realize that wow apartments are fucking expensive so they’re like “lardo wanna move in with us too so we can actually afford a place with a roof” and she’s like “sure”
imagine the shenanigans they’d get up to
so it’s a two bedroom apartment and for some reason holster and ransom get the smaller room??? but they shove a bunk bed in there and can kind of fit a desk there too and there’s only one closet but they’ve been sharing clothes for years so it’s not really an issue
lardo gets the bigger room with these fucking beautiful windows in it like there’s a window seat she likes to curl up in when it’s sunny outside and she sets an easel up next to them so she can paint in the natural light and she swears that her art looks better when it dries in the sun
she also gets a huge ass bed that dwarfs her completely but she loves it so much cause it’s got fucking soft sheets and a thousand fucking pillows because shitty has a weird fixation on throw pillows and picks her up cute ones that have like a cat face on them or a saying like “i love my bed more than i like you”
when shitty sleeps over there isn’t enough room for all the throw pillows and both him and lardo.
also shitty loves little spooning it like with lardo wrapped around his back like a backpack he feels super safe
lardo also likes being the little spoon. they flip a coin to decide who gets to be it that night
none of them can cook for shit so they have a drawer of take out menus and they pull one blindly out of the drawer for dinner. they are on a first name basis with all of the best places.
when bitty visits he is horrified and makes them stuff and puts it in the freezer. they have enough frozen dinners to last them a month. sometimes they just eat them cold cause they can’t be fucked to wait for them to heat up. they will never tell bitty this information.
lardo actually can make a few dishes she had as a kid and when she’s feeling nostalgic or giving she makes them all dinner and it is so much better than take out
holster is surprisingly the best at laundry and he’s not really doing much cause ransom has med school and lardo has art shit to do and holster has a pretty lax job doing the books for a start-up business down the street and he only has to go in like twice a week so he somehow becomes the house husband of the group doing dishes and laundry and cleaning the house up after parties and just on regular days
the apartment they bought is in providence or near providence or something to that effect so they go to jack’s games all the damn time. jack lets them sit with the WAGS cause bitty is busy with school so he can’t use the seats and he likes looking up at the box and seeing holster and ransom freak out and lardo curse violently. they’re great additions to the WAGs.
a couple of the older guys’ wives kind of adopt the three of them because dear lord you have take out every night? what cleaning product are you using on your kitchen you are going to kill yourself? you don’t use coupons do you know how helpful that shit is? so a bunch of the WAGs teach them how to cook basic meals and what to clean with and how to coupon like a boss
bitty moves up to providence after he graduates too and opens his own bakery with a little bit of jack’s help (look i know bitty wanted to work for it but when you have a nhl boyfriend who has more money than he knows what to do with you might as well take advantage) and lardo works there when she isn’t busy cause she likes spending time with bitty and she’s good at it and holster of course does the books for bitty who hates numbers with a passion and ransom crashes there when he’s test stressed
okay well back to lardo holster and ransom dream team; they have family nights once a week. they play board games and watch movies and go roller blading in the park (lardo is surprisingly better at rollerblading than ice skating and she whips their asses thoroughly)
they get drunk sometimes like as a group and they get tipsy and honest and one time lardo gets too honest and starts talking about how much she loves shitty and she notices the looks holster and ransom send each other as she says shit like “he’s just so good at making me happy, you know?” but the two idiots don’t notice it at all which is infuriating
the frogs graduate too and it seems like everyone else is living in providence so they move there too and soon the entire smh group is living in providence and it’s probably not healthy that they’re trying desperately to cling to their college years but fuck it they’re happy and it all started because of holster ransom and lardo moving in together
years later when they finally move in with their SOs lardo tells holster and ransom’s kids about how dense their fathers were and how it is totally her doing that they got together in the first place because she is the one that locked them in the bathroom together when ransom was taking a shower and she leaves out the part where she had to leave the apartment because damn were they loud
eI have a bunch of ideas, but this one was the loudest in my head this morning. Hopefully, you all like it. Please let me know if you want to be tagged and I forgot to add you. I’m so sorry.
Warnings: Language. Disclaimer: I don’t own Stranger Things or the GIF below. Word Count: 5.7 k MASTERLIST
do you think it went?” With your body folded in front of his, feet
like Jenga blocks between his sock covered ones, you asked while
feeling as comfortable as can be on the couch in the basement.
Billy couldn’t be sure. He had never done a formal meet-the-parents
dinner before so he didn’t have anything to compare it to. He didn’t
accidentally curse and no one died, so he chalked it up as a success
even if the meal had been riddled with pauses and awkward silences.
“I think it went okay.” He settled in closer to you on the couch,
sliding back so his chest could become your pillow, and decided. If
it was up to him, there wouldn’t have been any forced supper with
your family, but you had been giving your parents excuses for over a
month and now it had to happen. The two of you had been together for
four months and they were eager, especially your mother, to know who
was this character behind the wheel of a revved up hot rod keeping
you out until the wee hours of the morning on weekends. The name
Billy Hargrove meant nothing to them. He wasn’t part of the
community, he wasn’t someone that you had gone through elementary and
junior high years with. They had no face or story to link the name
Do you know anything about grief? If so, my character Vivian spent 6 months with a group of friends and fell in love with another character. The character he fell in love with head over heels for dies the night after they kiss. How would this grief affect active fighting ?
My grandmother on my mother’s side died when I was eleven, my father died when I was thirteen (the day after my birthday), my dog died a day before my college graduation, and my grandfather on my father’s side died from Alzheimer’s a few years ago. That’s not counting the friends and non-blood related family members who’ve died over the years.
So, yeah, I’ve got a little experience with grief, and grief counseling, and therapy, and… well, other people who’ve also lost friends and family.
I will say upfront that experience with grief can’t be faked when translating it into a fiction. You’ve either lost someone or you haven’t. You will never truly understand until you’ve experienced it yourself. And, if you haven’t, honestly, I hope you don’t join this unhappy club for a very long time.
Grief happens in stages, we consider them as five to be exact. Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. There is no one size fits all here, or rules, no guidelines for the amount of time it takes because we work through it in our own time. You can and often do go through all five just to accept the physical truth someone you love has died, then all over again with the emotional fallout in the months even years afterward. It’s possible to go forward and back between the stages, and it isn’t a steady process. I’ve come to terms with a lot of the deaths in my life, but some took around a decade to reach the acceptance stage.
In initial the months after my father died, I waited to hear his car coming up the driveway at the time he usually arrived home from work (around 5:30). Anytime the doorknob turned, I’d feel a small bit of hope that it’d be him walking in. I still hope, sometimes, nearly twenty years later, that he’ll come through the door.
I tried to hold on to what he sounded like when I realized a month later I was forgetting. I managed a single word, the name of a friend’s father.
The problem with writing grief if you’ve never experienced it is this: you will over focus on the emotion and forget the detail.
Grief is not being able to remember where you live when you dial 911 for the ambulance. It’s the adrenaline leaving your hands shaking when you reach for the body, and the cold stiffness beneath your hands. The chalky white skin, and one eyelid half open. A frozen, milky, blue-white pupil pointed nowhere. The faint, sour smell in the air.
The way you shake it, and shake it, and shake it like that’ll bring the body back to life.
The way you still describe it as the body years later instead of referring to it as him and in second person instead of first.
Grief is never being able to watch Oliver and Company again.
This detail is part of why it’s so difficult to describe or write grief
if you’ve never experienced the loss of a loved one first hand.
You’ve also got to describe that loss through the eyes of your character, re-imagine it so the experience is not only tailored to their experiences but laser specific to those exact moments when they learned or came to the realization someone they loved died. One of the first things to understand about death in fiction is that it won’t do the work for you.
My father died a week before my first degree black belt test, and I’d just turned thirteen. I honestly can’t remember much about that week. It was Spring Break, so I didn’t have to go to school. My days were mostly filled with martial arts and emptiness. There were moments I’d remember, then grow sad or try to avoid it by focusing on what was coming ahead of me. People told me how brave I was, clapped when I came back to training a day later, but the truth is that doing that was easier than remembering what happened. I was in the shock stage all the way through the test. Numb to the world, I didn’t feel anything. Not pride, not happiness, not “oh good we’re done now”, nothing at all. It wasn’t bravery, so much as it just was. The world moved around me and the rest of it was gray.
In that moment, I became “the Girl Whose Father Died The Week Before Her Test” in the organization and everyone knew who I was for years afterwards.
However, the moment I really broke down was when I returned to class afterwards and began to cry when one of my classmates pushed a crossword onto my desk that read “Father”. I cried so hard, then I went out into the hallway and cried through the rest of the class that day.
That’s one experience, though. Like I said, there’s no one size fits all and every experience is unique. If you’ve got a character whose lost a lot of people over the years, then it does get easier.
However, if you’re writing a character who experiences death on the regular then their experience is going to be different. You could get someone who numbs themselves out to the world, defers the loss until later, and deals with it then. A person for whom “doing things” is them showing their grief. They could crumple up into a ball, give up and just cry. They could get angry to the point they want to kill the person who took their loved one and want to kill them. They could be compromised to the point of they are incapable performing their job, and need to be scrubbed from a mission for their safety and their teammates.
They could get triggered by the violence to the point where they lock up and can’t mentally face it anymore, where it becomes too much for them to handle. Sometimes, they break all the furniture in their apartment. Sometimes, they don’t clean out the other side of the closet for six years. They may get angry and lash out at those close to them who aren’t experiencing this death as keenly as they are. Or the might do it just because, without reason. They might close themselves off from everyone they know and love. Wall up out of fear of losing another person, find it difficult to build new connections. Become a different person.
Or, rarely, they could be completely fine. Or, seem like they’re fine on the surface. Others who are suffering will get pissed at them if they’re fine. When it seems like you’re fine, others will call you a monster. How dare they.
Grief is not guaranteed to get you killed in combat, but it can. It leads to stupid mistakes because you’re mentally compromised, even when you don’t realize it. We run from it sometimes. It’s so big, and heavy, and dark, crashing down all at once with no easy answers. No platitude satisfies. Numb, angry, stricken, despairing, you can move through these states so rapidly that it’s almost impossible to follow. Grief just is.
In a situation where you need to be able to focus or your life and those around you are at risk, then grief becomes detrimental. If you’re mentally compromised and refuse to recognize it then it will only put others at risk. Many people will insist they are “fine”. That it doesn’t affect them, that they can still work. It does though. It will. As a result, events can be disastrous in the fallout.
Even if they can fight, revenge isn’t satisfying. It’s empty. Grief-fueled rampages will only lead to more sadness and more emptiness and a re-experiencing of the loss all over again. Usually, it causes more tragedy.
How will your character react? I don’t know.
How does grief affect fighting, even years afterward? It can be really bad, my friend. Really goddamn bad.
You’ve got to find an equilibrium in your mind and acceptance, real acceptance too. You can’t just tell yourself you’ve accepted it, and that difference can be difficult to grasp.
Understand loss is not the cause of grief, and not death itself. We will
grieve lost relationships and broken down friendships, when what we
love disappears from our grasp. Don’t assume it’s in the death, look at
the loss and how they feel about them being gone.
As a writer, your answer is they need to find a way to come to terms with this loss and that is a journey without an easily defined destination. I mean “come to terms” and not “get over”. Loss is with you forever, but whether we accept it or it continues to haunt us will be up to the person in question.
From me to you, here are some ways I dealt with my father’s death in my teenage years:
1) I went to counseling.
2) I read all the books of his on the shelf that I could scrounge from my parent’s bedroom, even when I didn’t like them. I still have a few of his fantasy hardbacks squirreled away.
3) I tried to play Star Wars: Tie Fighter.
4) I cried when I tried to tackle the Walkers in Rogue Squadron 2, because I’d always run to him and beg him to help me pass the level.
5) I’d go smell the shirts my mom left when she refused to clean out his side of the closet until they didn’t smell like him anymore. Then, I felt sad all over again.
6) I dedicated my open form during my second degree test to him, and picked a really sappy country song.
7) I read and re-read L.E. Modesitt Jr’s entire “Saga of Recluse” over and over again because Colors of Chaos was the first fantasy book my dad handed me to read.
8) I named my Sovereign Class ship in Star Trek Online after him.
I once sat with another student at college and we commiserated over our shared bond as members of the “Dead Parents Club”, telling stories about how our parents died and laughing about where we were now. To another student, who’d never experienced what we had, this seemed incredibly insensitive, they were confused, and they said so.
We said, “Dead Parents Club”. Then another student who’d recently lost their aunt asked if they could join us, and we expanded to members of the “Dead Relatives Club”.
It’s not all sadness and pain, misery and angst. In fact, if you go this route then it’s not really real. Much as it might seem like it on the surface, grief isn’t the same as literary angst. You need to show, not tell and that begins with actions. Start figuring
out how this loss affects your character before you take a stab at how
it’s affecting their ability to fight. Grief is about individuals, and
there are no easy answers. Only actions, decisions, and struggle for
good or ill.
Bandai Announces new Android & iOS My Tamagotchi Forever App
Bandai Namco Entertainment just announced a new app, My Tamagotchi Forever is an Android and iOS app. The app is developed by Paladin Studios, and will be available in 2018 for free! At this time there is a soft launch in Canada, so you’ll be able to download it now!
The app appears to feature your favorite Tamagotchi characters in TamaTown! There also appears to be the familiar nurturing basic care functions as well as some cool new high tech augmented reality features that we just cant wait to get our hands on!
Here’s the official press release:
Since Tamagotchi’s first installment a lot of elements have evolved to take advantage of new technology. My Tamagotchi Forever will feature some of the classic as well as brand new game modes. The first introduction is Tamatown, a joyful town where all your Tamagotchi characters will live. This colourful place is where you can customise and collect new elements to have even more fun with your teeny tiny characters. Along with the addition of Tamatown, there will be a lot more to experience in My Tamagotchi Forever: + Raise your Tamagotchi characters making sure you feed, wash, clean up and turn the lights out for a good night sleep keeping them happy and healthy. + Have fun with your Tamagotchi characters playing mini games and explore Tamatown together. Make friends with other Tamagotchi characters along the way. + Evolve your Tamagotchi characters from one type to another depending on how you care for them. You never know who they might become next! + Collect memorable moments shared with your Tamagotchi characters and the friendly town citizens. + Share your favorite moments with your friends. + Tickle your Tamagotchi characters. They love it! + Earn coins by playing mini games and levelling up! +Unlock delicious food, cute costumes and colourful items to decorate Tamatown. + Compare your progression and Tamagotchi raising skills with your friends!
THIS SOUNDS AWESOME! TamaTown is back! Be sure to check out the My Tamagotchi Forever website to learn more & enter in the contest to become your very own Tamagotchi character! 2018 can’t come soon enough, unless you’re in Canada! Canadians - head over to the App Store & Google Play store NOW!
Finally presenting my student film, Love Heist! It was originally meant to premiere in August of last year, but I decided to withhold it until SCAD’s student animation film festival, where all the senior films are shown. But that’s not until May, so I figured screw it, might as well upload it now.
This was the first time I’ve completed an animated short film! The animation was completed back in August, and looking back on it there’s A LOT I would have done differently had I had the know-how or the time to go back and alter it, but I’m still very proud of what I managed to put out, and of the super talented folks at SCAD who assisted with cleaning up the film!
I’m thankful to all of them, and my buddy @zeroslashj, who did the awesome score for it!
My time at SCAD is behind me now, but I learned a lot there and met loads of amazing people! I hope you enjoy my film, and I hope my next animated piece tops this one in every way!
hey sorry I'm sure you're tired of answering questions about essential oils, but my mom is really into doTERRA (like she's going to conferences and things) and the company says that a lot of their products are safe to ingest. she's genuinely trying to help people, so I don't know how to convince her she could be hurting them in the long run (and that she's part of a pyramid scheme). Any advice? thanks!
Unfortunately doTERRA do what they do extremely well in ensnaring people into their harmful bullshit. Most cults are. This article written by Kayla Fioravanti is really helpful about how to identify when you’re actually in a MLM (Multi Level Marketing) cult:
She speaks from the experience of being a former sales rep for an MLM cult and having escaped one. Her website also has a lot of links and resources to helpful articles and books.
If you’re mom wants to make a career out of something like this, and really truly wants to help people, I would push her towards looking into becoming involved with the
National Association for Holistic Aromatherapy https://naha.org/, which has links to credible schools, resources, journals, and even has a store of their own for books and some misc other stuff.
It’s not as easy as going to a doTERRA conference and being sold thousands of dollars of oils and being told you can save the world and run your own business from home, but in the long run it’ll give her a solid foundation of knowledge, contacts and resources to buy credible oils from to actually run her own business if she ever wanted to.
A good book if you can get your hands on it is also by Robert Tisserand, Essential Oil Safety: A Guide for Healthcare Practitioners. It’s way more expensive than most other “how to use essential oil books” because well, it’s effectively a medical journal and goes into extreme detail about the safety of using essential oils. Foremost among them “do not drink them”. I honestly feel it should be required reading for everyone who wants to work with essential oils. But then I’d also like a million dollars and functional immune system.
There’s even the Tisserand Institute, where you can take online courses, and he even makes some of his things for free so that people have access to them and don’t hurt themselves. https://tisserandinstitute.org/safety/
I think he’s running a free webinar this month too, so if you can get the time zones to match up, maybe get her interested in that and let her know you’ve been doing your own research and that this guy is profoundly more ethical than doTERRA, which have been linked to several controversies like their oils not being ethically sourced and also evidence that shows their oils are adulterated and test positive as synthetics when tested by independent non affiliated labs.
And here’s the thing about that, I used to be able to google search for that term, and come up with a lot of results. But a lot of those sources are now gone. They’ve been scrubbed clean, which, y’know, if you read the “12 signs you might be in a cult” link, you’ll know is one of the primary warning signs. (So if anyone still has those links, please hit me up cause I cannot find them rn.)
A naturopath who is known to me, Katherine Maslen, also talks about how much of a scam they are. And while I disagree with her on some points (re: taking small doses of essential oil internally) I agree with pretty much the entire sentiment that doTERRA, Young Living and MLM companies like them, basically sat around a big table and decided people weren’t buying enough of their oils, so a great way to get around this was to tell people it was totally safe and totally good for you to just take a sip babes.
So again I’m going to rec getting her to look into a NAHA approved school if she’s dead set on helping people, and also maybe checking out the Tisserand Institute site. I learned a lot from him when I was first starting out. And as I’ve said in the past, I gain nothing from recommending him. I very purposefully do not post to any of his stuff using my affiliate accounts because I do not want to sell you something. I just want you to be safe. Which he does too, which is why he does a lot of things for free.
Best of luck with your mom. And heck, tell if her she wants another adult to talk to who actually has done holistic work in the past (though mostly retired from it now) I’m open to chatting. MLM cults are extremely effective at isolating people from their support groups and their families. They train them to perceive all concerns as baseless criticism, and that only they believe in your true potential. You just need to pay them money.
im on mobile so idk if you have rules but if you take requests would you ever write fluh having a panic attack nd blackhat helping?
Despite what Demencia said, Flug didn’t have panic attacks all that often. Besides, she was thinking of ‘anxiety attack’ when she said that, which Flug had never experienced. Two different things.
But that didn’t mean he’d never had a panic attack. Once or twice or- a handful more. Flug was starting to think he might have some sort of panic disorder, it might help to explain his skittish nature, somewhat.
The problem about panic attacks, at least by Flug’s experiences, was they tended not to have any cause. They just happened.
The screwdriver bounced off once- then twice. He couldn’t understand why he suddenly couldn’t hold the tool straight, he’d been doing fine so far. He dropped the tool- it bounced again, off the table onto the floor- Flug grabbed the casing, twisting it around and trying to push the wire to sticking into the device-
He dropped the whole thing, clenching his chest. He needed air- he gasped in as much as he could, but it wouldn’t go down- it trapped itself somewhere in his throat, rushing out and leaving him breathless- he hit the table before he knew he was moving forward, trying to keep himself up and his last meal down.
The world spun around him suddenly- he was on the floor, crawling, bumping into a wall and curling up, hiding from them the eyes they could see him had to get away-
Nobody would know if he just died under this table. 505 might find him, but who knew how long that would take with all the bear was expected to clean. Demencia might assume he was sleeping and just draw on his bag- couldn’t- had to- he tried to uncurl himself, couldn’t move- had too-
Flug didn’t understand. Couldn’t understand. The word bounced off his head, meaningless. Something moving- near-
Black Hat lowered himself to one knee slowly, eyes locked on the mortal. His scientist was wound up tight in a little ball, shaking like a leaf and looking at nothing.
“Look at me Flug.” Black Hat said as clearly as he could, holding out his fingers and snapping them twice. When the man didn’t respond, Black Hat knew it was a touch to late to stop the worst of Flug’s attack.
He crawled under the deck, removing his coat as he did so to drape over Flug. The coat dwarfed him- hiding him. Black Hat pulled Flug closer, letting what parts of Flug shown through the coat hide against his chest, slipping his hands under both his coat and Flugs lab coat, beginning to rub and soothe the tense muscles.
The man slowly began to stop shaking as much, clenching to Black Hat’s shirt.
“Good… Good doctor.” Black Hat muttered, drifting his hands up to Flugs shoulders. “… now, you’re wearing a paper bag on your head. Breath into it.” Black Hat commanded. “These have never lasted long, haven’t they? You’ll be fine.”
He didn’t think Flug could really understand a word he was saying.
“In… out… remember you’re exercises, doctor. Why a human needs to practice breathing as always been beyond me, but you have no excuse not to fail them now.” Black Hat tugged the edges of the bag down, pinching the bottoms closed on either side of Flug’s head. The bag began to expand and collapse with Flug’s breaths.
He counted along himself, letting the bag go to allow the rush of clean air back inside, allowing Flug to rebalance himself, then did it again.
Flug’s breathing soothed out, bit by bit, his body finally stilling as he simply laid against his boss. Black Hat kept a close eye on him, slowly pulling off those goggles, watching for any signs of resistance, before the bag swiftly followed.
Flug’s eyes still held a touch of panic, but he breathed out slowly and gave his boss a fake smile.
“Tha-thank you J-jefecito.” Flug muttered, tugging the others coat higher onto his body and snuggling in.
At the top we have my 12L tank, the first I ever had and the one responsible for thos whole shrimp and fish obsession. First photograph is July 2016 and the second is November 2016, just before this tank was dismantled (it’s now in storage).
The second photo is of my 23L Fluval Edge in November 2016 and June 2017, I’ve just spent all afternoon cleaning this one out and trimming plants etc. This tank contains 5 Amano shrimp who have been with me for over a year now, 1 nerite snail and 6 Endler guppies who I’m contemplating re-homing as I only learnt recently that this tank is a bit small for them. There’s someone local who is looking for fish donations for a tank that they’re setting up in a primary school, I know they’re looking for hardy brightly coloured fish so they might find their home there!
Third photo is of my newest tank, a 32L custom tank that fits in an Ikea Kallax shelf unit. Photos April 2017 and June 2017 It houses my 8 Otocinclus as well as numerous Neocaridina and 4 glass shrimp. I’m gradualy changing it to an amazon-esque sort-of biotope for them. There’s so many places to hide I hardly see them.
two of my often-forgotten favourites from Blazing Sword, Canas and Nino! (well maybe not Nino since in Heroes she is super popular! now give me Canas IntSys pleeeease I neeeeeed hiiim) I love them both and their support was so cute ;o;
How about some angst/comfort for our ol' bird boy, Mod Pasta? Chisaki being comforted by his s/o as best they can after he lost both of his hands. (P.S. I feel so bad for him cuz he won't be able to fully participate in any dances like Cha-Cha Slide. :C)
Ew I’m studying so much for finals, ew. This made me cry, I want more.
“Kai?…” He hadn’t spoken ever since you found him in the middle of the street with the truck he had been escorted in burning behind him while he bled out. You quickly took him to your apartment and away from the public eye, sadly having to leave for a few minutes to sprint to a store and get their largest medical kit you could find. You had tried to convince him to go to a villain hospital, but he wouldn’t let you.
So there you sat for six hours, the only noises leaving him being that of a wince or a sigh; he was used to pain at this point. You had used medical stitches after cleaning the wound and having to amputate part of the bone after sharpening your best serrated knife. This was all from memory, google research and a bit of help from your doctor friend on the phone. She had hung up just minute before, screaming that she would be coming over as soon as she got off her shift.
“If you’re wondering how I got it-” His voice was hoarse and soft.
“I’m not. I want to know why you got it,” You swallowed hard, glancing at the remaining stitches. You might need more tomorrow when you would remove them and clean the wound once again.
“I underestimated who I was dealing with,” He whispered under his breath, his eyes not wandering from the floor. This was so unlike him - he would have snapped at you for interrupting him, then do something lewd to retain his dominance. Now he just seemed… broken, like he could wrap his head around how to speak. After washing and sanitizing your hands, you walking to him and leaned down to wrap your arms around him awkwardly since he was sitting on the bathtub.
“Shh, you’re going to be okay Kai,” You whisper, closing your eyes. He flinches away from you, and you just hold on as he starts to trash and scoot away.
“I don’t need your affection, I don’t need love, I just need…” He trailed off, his eyes widening as he raised them to look up at you. Now you could tell why he wasn’t looking at you; he was holding back tears, the whites of his eyes red and puffy with how he held them back.
“You need to rest and recover. It’s over, Kurono isn’t responding to my messages,” You pulled on his shoulder, and he limply got up and followed you out of the bathroom, “And I know you don’t want it to be, you don’t have to tell me.”
“I-Ah, right, you’re my girlfriend,” He muttered, sighing and lolling his head as you felt him apply a little more of his weight to you, and you stifled a sigh, “(F/N)?”
“Yeah Kai?” You glanced at his blank face with your usual large doe eyes that he adored so much. He didn’t respond until he was lying on your bed, a sheet of saran wrap coating the entire bed so that any excess blood or pus wouldn’t stain the sheets. He laid there, unmoving.
“I don’t…” He blinked a couple of times, as if surprised that he had lost his words. He was usually so composed, he usually felt pride, power, dominance and absolute curiosity, but now he couldn’t seem to feel anything at all, “I think my mission is over.”
“Kai, you sound like -” You gasped as tears pricked your eyes, “No, how could you say tha-I… No. You’re not allowed to die,” You ordered, climbing over him and straddling him. He stared up at you drearily.
“What else do I have to do in life?” He whispered as if his shadow could hear him speak. He sounded afraid, he looked so lonely, and you wished you could scream out that he wasn’t alone, but he looked so far away right now that reaching out wouldn’t do you any good. So you sat on his lap, a foreign feeling residing on your hips. His hands used to rest there, but you cannot cry. You have to be strong.
“What would I do if you were gone? You are my life, the light of my whole entire life,” You leaned down, and as you pecked his chapped lips that you hadn’t gotten around to washing the dried blood off of, you heard his breath catch in his throat.
“You can live without me. You have purpose in your life, (F/N). I’m just a failed gang leader, a failed scientist at that,” He scoffed, gritting his teeth as silent tears streamed down his face, hot enough to leave red marks in their wake.
“You made the syrym work, and you didn’t have a gang, you had a family,” You closed your eyes, gently resting your soft forehead against his scratched up own, “and if you liked them, you could have one with me.”
“Look away, I c-can’t cover my face,” He choked on his own words as he started to break down. His body convulsed under you as you hugged his shoulders loosely and buried your face in the crook of his neck. He sobbed, hiccuped, wailed and vented, and all you did was listen and nod, whispering sweet nothings in his ear until he eventually fell into an uneven sleep. You wouldn’t forget his sleepy words as he drifted off, though…
“A family? With a man like me? How could I ever have found a woman like you… You’re too good to me, goddamnit.”
You know, everyone who gets to know me asks if I have kids. I am 24, but I look older and I guess they don’t want to assume. When I say I don’t, they often ask what I do as a follow up. When I say I work with kids there is usually a comment about how working with kids is the best form of birth control.
I love kids. Most days I wouldn’t mind a kid. Kids are smart, they are generally very kind, and they are hella creative! If I’m upset at work I will pop up into our preschool and play telephone with the kids or read a book. They help me like myself.
You know what the best birth control is? Watching shitty parents. Shitty parents who gossip. Shitty parents who are still trying to be “fetch,” like you aren’t in high school anymore Jesse! Shitty parents who leave their friends to clean up a mess. Shitty parents who choose to let their kid cry it out or send an older sibling to check on them. Shitty parents who undermine their child’s needs. Shitty parents who call their kids “rotten” or “stinker” right in front of them. Shitty parents are the literal worst. The best birth control around is watching shitty parents because it scares me to think that I might one day be a shitty parent, even for a nanosecond. It scares me because I know “keeping up with the Jones” already overshadows my heart.
Don’t say kids are bad when in reality you are a shitty parent.
I, for some reason, picture Billy as an animal person but he doesn’t always go for the perfect, fluffy, clean animals. He goes for the misfits and the ones that are almost always considered unadoptable like the ones with missing limbs or the ones who are blind, and he has a soft spot for strays. He probably feeds the strays every chance he gets.
And he probably loves them so much because he knows how it feels to be shut out and unwanted.
That is until Steve, who makes him feel loved and wanted, and he wants to give that back, so when he and Steve get their own place, he brings in strays and gets them cleaned up before turning them around to adopt them out to good homes, and he might keep a few after pouting at Steve.
Is there more to say about young and scared tony coming to the Rogers castle, or nah?
I mean I could go into it a little more I guess???
Like, Tony is terrified of doing something wrong and being sent to the dungeon. He’s surprised he wasn’t squirreled away in the dungeon already. Those first couple of weeks are spent on his best behavior. He does everything he’s told (which isn’t much; just telling him he can unpack his trunks since he’s there to stay (he does so quietly and frowns when he sees how empty the shelves and bureau are), to ask for whatever he needs (he doesn’t even know what he needs), and to feel free to go wherever he wants as long as he doesn’t leave the palace grounds (he doesn’t trust that he can go anywhere he wants)).
And then Sarah announces that she’s finally decided what to do with him. Tony is so, so scared because she could sentence him to death, but if she banishes him it’s as good as a death sentence anyway–all his friends are gone, anyone who would take care of him. He doesn’t even really know how to dress himself. If he was banished… the best he could really hope for was finding an alpha to marry who wouldn’t care that he couldn’t cook or clean (he could learn probably) and just give them lots of babies.
“You’ll marry Prince Anthony to try and mend some fences,” Sarah continues, and Tony feels his heart drop down to his toes when Steve sits up straighter, looking affronted. Bucky’s face betrays nothing, and that’s even scarier. “The former Stark kingdom is in upheaval. Seeing their prince taken care of might soothe some of the anger. In any case, there’s a lot of work to do. Hopefully Tony’s knowledge of his country and customs will ease the way.” “Ma,” Steve begins, then stops and sighs angrily instead when she gives him one stern look. Sarah stares Steve down a little longer before turning her gaze on Tony, expression softening. “Is that agreeable with you, Anthony?” Tony wrings his hands under the table, wanting to say ‘no’ even though he knows it’s a trick question and what he wants doesn’t really matter. So he ducks his head demurely like he’d learned back in Obadiah’s court and murmurs, “It’s agreeable with me.”
(Steve doesn’t… rage about it, but he’s angry. Tony hears whispers about it and he feels so guilty, like there’s a heavy weight in the pit of his stomach. But he’s more scared of Bucky, because he doesn’t say anything about it at all.)
((Tony doesn’t know that this is because Bucky had grabbed Steve by the collar and venomously whispered, “Aren’t I enough? You got me, Steve, and you really shouldn’t have–can’t I be enough? Can you stop being selfish for one goddamn minute? Anthony may have been the enemy at one time but he surrendered gracefully. If you’re anything but civil to him, I’ll never forgive you.” Steve knows that Bucky means it. Bucky had been ready to never be able to marry him, to marry an omega and just keep Steve as a tender ache in his heart when Steve needed to marry for politics and heirs. Steve really is being greedy, after being so lucky to marry the person he actually loves. He tries to remember that whenever he interacts with Tony.))
Tony hates how he relieved he feels later, though. He’ll be taken care of here. So he’ll have to endure heats with alphas that don’t particularly care for him–at least he and his children will be safe. He can’t help but think at least these alphas will be gentle with him though. They’re respectful of his body even though they’re engaged. Tiberius–Tiberius hadn’t been respectful from the beginning, when they’d just been courting. Maybe their respect will continue into the bedroom.
(Maybe they’ll realize they’re big and he’s small and they could hurt him so easily, he thinks hopefully. Maybe they’ll take care of him instead of just use his body. Maybe it won’t hurt. Obadiah said it would, but… Bucky and Steve are very gentle with each other, and they’re alphas. Maybe they’ll be gentle with their weaker mate, too. Tony has learned not to hope over the years, but he can’t help it for this. He wants to hope.)
((Steve and Bucky hear about what Obadiah told Tony, that he was only a hole to be used, that his pleasure didn’t matter (or didn’t exist), that if it didn’t hurt then he was doing it wrong. They actually weep over the idea that Tony would enter into a marriage with someone and expect sex to hurt him. They go out of their ways to be very gentle with Tony on their wedding night, to make him feel good, to show him that Obadiah was wrong and sex isn’t supposed to hurt. Tony deserves to be loved and cherished.))
(((Then they learn about Tiberius Stone and realize that would have been Tony’s reality, and they’re angry about it but also so, so relieved because Tony will never have to know that. They had a rough start, but they’re working to make up for it.)))
There’s a difference between wisdom and intelligence. Intelligence is superficial in a sense. What I mean by that is, intelligence refers to something along the lines of seeing a concept or strategy and understanding it with ease. While wisdom is deeper and intuitive, transpiring observable facts alone. It is an extensive understanding of how humankind operates and a grasp of why certain traits are so important for us to exhibit. Why these traits are beneficial to hold forth in everything we do. Shikadai has this kind of comprehension. We saw how wounded he looked when he learned that Boruto cheated, yet in the most recent episode, we see Shikadai’s display of wisdom and selflessness. We see his understanding in how he shows no need to hold a grudge, especially not in a moment where there is vast chaos going on already. Shikadai easily pushes his recent personal hurt aside and stands up to be the friend Boruto needs during this time. Shikadai doesn’t judge, but he observes deeply. Even after what happened, he notes just how much of a caring person Boruto actually is, even if others are doubting him after the gigantic mistake he made. Just take a look at the glance Shikadai gives Boruto when he is rushing down the hospital hallway. He is not giving a clueless look, or bitter look, he’s giving a look of acknowledgment. An observant and insightful look that’s witnessing just how much his friend cares for others. He‘s seeing his friend’s heart for his family, for his village, for his father. In fact I’m even gonna go to the extent to say that Shikadai is already aware of the kind of lesson his friend is in the middle of learning, and sees the type of change the whole situation is going to foster in his best friend. Yeah, Boruto messed up. But Shikadai’s eyes aren’t on that. His eyes are on who he KNOWS Boruto to be, even behind his incredulous stupidity. He knows that Boruto is the type of guy who might make reckless messes, but he also knows Boruto is the type of guy to clean them up when he realizes that he was in the wrong. Shikadai has seen his friend watch out for others, bring people together, and change the mindsets of those around him in a positive manner. Shikadai, being the insightful and intelligent person he is has no questions about the type of person Boruto is. He sees the world in a whole different level, with the amount of intelligence, wisdom, and discernment he already possesses at this age.
Not placing this in my “official” lore tag, because what is lore? But I figured this could be of interest to some people, since I, myself needed it to see who all our Bard Bann (in tabletop) still needed to ally himself with.
Basically a very quick guide to known territories in Ferelden and who last owned them (as far we know) or currently owns them, as far as we know. Which basically means, the leaders of these territories could have changed in between meeting them and Post-Trespasser time.
But this is my best estimation given the information we have access to at the moment. I’m including those from the tabletop. I might add to and clean this up as I finally organize my tabletop collection and flip through the World of Thedas books for more info. Because I’m sure I’m missing a few or there is more updated dates/nobles out there, but like I said a Very Quick List.
Gwaren (Formerly Owned by Loghain Mac Tir, in 9:30)
Highever (Currently Owned by Fergus Cousland, as of 9:30)
Amaranthine (Owned by the Grey Wardens, Formerly ran by the Hero of Ferelden, in 9:30-9:31)
Denerim (Formerly Owned by Rendon Howe, in 9:30)
Edgehall (Currently Owned by Gell Lendon)¹
Redcliffe (Formerly Owned by Eamon Guerrin, in 9:30; Currently Owned by Teagan Guerrin, in 9:41)
South Reach (Currently Owned by Leonas Bryland, as of 9:30)
West Hills (Currently Owned by Gallaghar Wulff, as of 9:30)
City of Amaranthine (Formerly Owned by Bann Esmerelle, in 9:30-9:31)
Denerim (Currently Owned by Adric Baranti, as of 9:31)²
Dragon’s Peak (Currently Owned by Bann Sighard, as of 9:30)
Ruswold (Currently Owned by Bann Trumhall or Bann Valdur Krole)³
[Caer] Oswin (Currently Owned by Bann Loren? Formerly Occupied by the Seekers of Truth and the Order of Fiery Promise, in 9:41)⁴
Rainesfere (Formerly Owned by Teagan Guerrin, in 9:30)⁵
Southern Bannorn (Currently Owned by Bann Ceorlic, as of 9:30)
Waking Sea (Currently Owned by Alfstanna Eremon, as of 9:40)
West Hill (Currently Owned by Bann Franderel, as of 9:30)
¹ Arl Gell Landon can actually be dismissed or made a figurehead in the tabletop, but Bioware canon (via the comic, Knight’s Errant) says he is still in power.
² It seems to be a common consensus (among tabletop players and GMs) that Adric took over Denerim after whatever his grandmother’s fate is/was. However, I believe it is within the story’s possibilities that his grandmother continues to rule as of 9:40.
³ Dependent on the tabletop quest outcome
⁴ I don’t remember at the moment if Bann Loren was killed or simply removed from his Bannorn, like Teagan was removed from Redcliffe. I am going with the assumption Bann Loren was simply displaced, but if anyone knows for sure otherwise let me know.
⁵ I don’t know if Teagan still owns Rainesfere, seeing as he is Arl of Redcliffe and as far as I know Ferelden nobles can only hold one territory at a time.
Who did it first special (not sure if we just pick one question, if so then number 2) with Tokoyami please!
Who asked who out first?
Tokoyami asked you out first. He kinda of goes on a tangent, mostly because he’s nervous, using flowery phrases that sound like he’s asking you on a date, but you’re not sure. When you ask for clarification he ruffles his feathers and in more simple terms asks you to go out with him.
Who initiated the first kiss?
You did. Tokoyami was too hesitant, afraid of making a wrong move, so it was up to you to show you wanted nothing more than to smooch his cute self. He’s surprised that you’re the first to move on, a bit flustered, but nonetheless happy because kissing you felt quite heavenly.
Who said I love you first?
You did. You didn’t know if he was going to say it first or if he was waiting until the time felt right, as it would fit with his character, but when you felt it, you felt it. You tell him you love him without hesitation and he senses that, making him feel much more confident when he finally replies about also loving you.
Who would have the others picture as their phone background?
He’s got a photo with you two under a snapchat filter, mostly because you had thought the picture was so cute and great that you insisted it had to be his phone background. He agreed, of course.
He does. He has a talent for coming up with dramatic speeches that make you teary-eyed, and he’d use this tactic for his proposal too. It’s something he’d been working on for days and though you’re initially confused, seeing him get down on one knee you realize exactly what he’s getting at and how much planning had really gone into making the moment perfect.
Who does the dishes?
He will. He doesn’t mind doing some household chores or helping you out because he prefers things be clean, and he’ll do them as soon as possible because he knows he might forget if he puts them off. He has a little list of chores written out for himself pinned to the fridge that he’ll check off daily to make sure he did all that had to be done.
Who’s the first to wake up in the morning?
Tokoyami. He’s quite the night owl but even then, he still wakes up relatively early even after going to bed late. He can function on less than 6 hours of sleep easily, though he can sleep in for an hour or so if it was a really late night.
Who gets to pick the movie type on movie nights?
He lets you pick, and just goes with what you want for the most part. If there’s a movie he wants to show you he’ll let you know, but otherwise, he just goes with the flow of movie night even if he dislikes the type of movie you pick.
Who lavishes the other one in gifts?
Tokoyami isn’t too big on getting gifts, and he doesn’t like to be frivolous with giving them. He likes to spend time together making memories, and prefers that to gifts any day.
Who worries more about the other?
Tokoyami keeps a calm face on for the most part, but he does worry about your well-being when he’s not around. He’s very protective over you in a knight in shining armor way, and will defend you until he breathes his last breath.