might as well go all out

they ask you about being a student and this is what it’s like: you get home from school feeling more exhausted than you did yesterday but not as exhausted as you’ll feel tomorrow and that’s just how it is. that’s how things go and you walk through the front door and you trudge up the stairs like you do every day and think maybe today you’ll take all those pills you’ve got hidden in the bathroom but then you remember you have four important tests tomorrow so that means killing yourself is not an option for today or maybe that means it’s more of an option but before you can figure that out you’ve already walked past the bathroom so there’s no point in walking back. might as well stay in your room and study.

it’s not like your physical or mental health even matters, you don’t even question anymore if it does. you’re too busy maintaining your gpa and writing scholarship essays and running two different clubs and participating in sports and band and choir or whatever else it is and you know that these activities are supposed to be fun, they’re supposed to be what you like, but nowadays they feel more like an obligation because colleges won’t consider you if all you have is good grades. no, that’s not enough, and you can’t help feeling that everything else isn’t enough either. you are not enough and you cry and cry but then stop crying when the headache occurs because how are you going to be productive while you have a headache?

anyways nothing is about you anymore, not really. you either don’t have time for activities you enjoy or said activities are no longer enjoyable because everything is an obligation now. that’s just how it is, and every single day you fulfill every single obligation, feeling more and more like you’re preparing for a future when that’s really the opposite of what you want.

but then again if you don’t have a future, if that future ends today, you won’t fulfill all your obligations tomorrow and maybe that’s a good thing but maybe it’s not, so you just keep living out of pure indecisiveness.

school may have taught you many things, but how to keep living was not one of them. it didn’t teach you how to be happy or how to love yourself and even though you were self-taught many scientific theories and ideas, things like happiness and self-love were not concepts you could ever fully comprehend on your own so nowadays you don’t even try to and oh why are you still here, this is not a productive usage of your time, you have four important tests tomorrow and those should come before everything else.

—  memoirs of a high school valedictorian // k.m. (via @perceivingwords)
EXO React to the Silent Treatment

You ignore them (For your own reasons)

Xiumin: ‘Can you at least tell me what I did?’

Originally posted by xiundeer

Xiumin would not handle the silence very well. Minnie might freak out and wonder what he did, so he can fix whatever it is as quickly as possible. He might consult the others for help as well.

Suho: *Waiting for you to talk first*

Originally posted by yixingofficial

JoonMyeon would just let you have your space, not pushing you to say anything but waiting for you to explain what’s going on inside of your head.

Lay: *Has no idea what to do*

Originally posted by yixingofficial

Yixing would have no idea what to do. He has never been put into this situation before and would probably just keep asking you what happened to make you ignore him.

Baekhyun: *Stress-eats* ‘Did she find out that I stole all her make-up or something?’

Originally posted by wooyoung

Baekhyun would not be too stressed about you ignoring him, you do it all the time for work and studying, but if you ignore him for too long he’ll think about all the pranks he’s pulled and things he’s done wrong. *Freaks out internally*

Chen: ‘You won’t be able to ignore me for long.’

Originally posted by kiimjongbae

Jongdae would do everything in his power to make you smile at him again, he would not leave you alone for even a second. He might use some really bad aegyo and buying you loads of teddy bears and chocolates, whatever he can to get you back.

Chanyeol: ‘I made something for you.’

Originally posted by yeollovemebaek

The happy virus will be like Chen, not even bothering to ask what he did wrong, mainly focused on what he can do to make it right. He’ll buy you a whole bunch of gifts and maybe show you a new song he’s been working on.

D.O: ‘What to do? What to do?’

Originally posted by dyoru

I feel like Squishy-Soo would know what to do, he’ll probably have a whole bunch of ideas, and because he has so many ideas he does not know what to choose. In the end he might just end up cooking dinner for you and than asking you what happened.

Kai: *Internally questions everything he’s ever done*

Originally posted by selubaekai

Jongin will be a little lost puppy on this one, he knows he’s done nothing wrong, and that confuses him. He’ll wait for you to talk to him, but will be freaking out internally.

Sehun: *Walks up to you immediately and asks you to explain.*

Originally posted by kairamelo

Sehun-nie would not be able to handle not knowing what is going on. He’ll force you to talk about it, not letting the silence go on for too long before he drags the problem out of you. 

anonymous asked:

Gideon going to a con and seeing something from one of Dipper's favorite things, but it's all sold out (coughBILLcough) and he gets frustrated before seeing a Kpop CD and merchandise of Will's favorite things and just gets them for his cousin and goes home and tells Will "I saw these and thought I might as well since I didn't find anything for my love"

I really, really, really adore this! I need more of Gideon being nice to Will in my life. fuck I need Gideon in this AU to have more character in general. 

He’s a huge dick and creepy as hell but that doesn’t mean he’s evil, after all. 


“Pap, let go of it and get out. NOW.”

AGAIN. Again with that crazy crossover. Well it was kinda my first idea before it mutated into the… Mangle sweet spaghetti thing. Well Sans, this eye of yours is quite handsome, isn’t ? You can see ghost and things !

Am I finished with this crossover ? Not at all ! I might even got some Sans vs Purple guy action coming up soon if i put my mind into it.

Thank you for actually supporting my nightmare creation. I nailed Freddy way too much on this one, GOSH.

anonymous asked:

hello lottie, i need some advice. so i've identified as bisexual for about a year now, but i've only dated guys so far. recently, someone suggested that the reason none of my relationships w guys have worked out well might be bc i'm actually not interested in men, and i'm a little stumped. have you ever struggled with knowing whether you're attracted to people of a certain gender/what that means for your identity? do you have any advice? thanks a bunch, love u, xx

oh god, YES. constantly. ALL THE TIME. 

I like to call what you’re having a BISEXISTENTIAL CRISIS™. generally mine go like this: lie in bed thinking about marrying Kristen Stewart. swear, hand-to-heart, that there is no one else for me on this good earth, except maybe Clea DuVall. realise that, if I’m being completely honest with myself, I can only ever imagine ending up with a woman. sit bolt upright. gasp. whisper, “am I… a lesbian?” wonder what this means for my bisexual sideblog. panic for a few seconds. grab my phone and google “Chris Evans beard”. scroll. realise I am definitely not a lesbian. lie down. chuckle. go to sleep. repeat every 6-8 weeks.

my advice (to myself, every day) is generally just “ROLL WITH IT”, which I know is about as useful as nipples on a breastplate, but honestly, what else am I SUPPOSED to advise myself? I am a goddamned MESS re: romantic/sexual attraction and that ever-swinging GENDER PENDULUM. (although, it’s less a pendulum and more that game with the tennis ball on the string that you smack back and forth around the pole. SMACK! boys. SMACK! girls. SMACK! everyone. SMACK! anyone the slightest bit feminine, regardless of gender identity. SMACK! Oscaar Isaac and absolutely no one else, for about three weeks now.)

I think the thing that we all forget is that a) except in the Representation Is Important and Young Queer People Should See Themselves Reflected Both in Popular Culture and in Their Idols way, IT DOESN’T ACTUALLY MATTER THAT MUCH, and b) YOU DON’T HAVE TO TELL PEOPLE SHIT. whenever I’m in the throes of a Bisexistential Crisis™ that lasts longer than googling Chris Evans’ beard, I tend to gently remind myself that absolutely no one is going to come banging on my door in the next ten minutes DEMANDING to know EXACTLY how I identify, who I’m attracted to, and how. I don’t have to update my CV with my sexuality. there’s no deadline on Figuring Things Out! everything is okay! I can keep changing my mind for the next 60 years! who even cares?!

so yeah, my advice is pretty much “ROLL WITH IT”, with a side of “have a deep chat with yourself, on and off, for the rest of your life”. maybe you’re sexually attracted to some genders and romantically attracted to others. maybe it overlaps a bit in the middle. maybe you don’t have a clue and you’re just gonna have to keep touching dicks to find out. maybe you’ll never touch another dick in your life. maybe you’ll touch TEN MORE DICKS! who knows, not me, life is a journey, the past is a statement, the future is a question, enjoy.

Also how adorable was Zero sort of stepping up to Jude to kiss him. Jude is a lil bit taller than him and it looks like he lifted up on the balls of his feet at first.


anonymous asked:

I have an ear infection and a fever and I feel like I may actually be dying. Can you give me links or fic to take my mind off just how miserable I'm feeling?

i’m sorry you’re not feeling well, anon– here are a few sterek fics that might help cheer you up:

  • untitled by felicitysmock (Not Rated, 3k) “Sure, I like him,“ Derek scowls right at the camera, “We’re friends.” He blinks, expression suddenly going hopeful, “Why, did he say something?” / “I have worked at Beacon Hills Office Supplies for two and a half years,“ Stiles pretends to hang himself with his tie, glances out of the conference room to where Derek is signing for a package with a suspicious look on his face. “It’s not all bad, I guess?”
  • Bogarted by HalfFizzbin (M, 3k) Alternate Title: “Dick Failwolf, Private Eye.“ (Or, Derek’s hit with a Film Noir curse, which forces him to narrate his own life in luridly-detailed prose.)
  • Sideways and Slantways and Longways and Backways by hologramaphone (T, 8k) “I called you a slave-driver!” Stiles cried hysterically. “I called you an ogre! I stole all the blue paperclips!”
    Derek raised an eyebrow at him. “That’s company property!” he shouted, waving his arms madly in distress. Derek ran a hand over his face. “It’s not theft if the vice president of the company gives you permission.”

and also some fluffy fic reclists!

feel better soon!  ❤ ❤ ❤

shnee asked:

fck okay what are ur hc for how the batkids die im already suffering because of Sad Old Bruce might as well go all the way

IM SO GLAD SOMEONE ASKED THIS HAHA *cracks knuckles* lets party 

-Dick dies quick and there’s no body to bury, his death isn’t something that’s dragged out and tbh, that’s exactly how he would’ve wanted it. He doesn’t want anyone to see his bleeding, broken body (like how he had to see his parents.) I feel like Dick would die for his friends/family. There would be an enemy that they just can’t take down and Dick is the one to sacrifice himself in order for the enemy to be taken down. I could see him blowing himself up along with their base. He tells everyone he’ll make it out and once they all see the flames they know Dick is a goddamn liar. 

-Jason’s death, or second death is calmer than his first. I could see him being shot or stabbed through the gut and then he shoots whoever got him before his knees buckle and time seems to slow down. He’s aware of someone catching him but everything’s blurry and he can feel warmth spread throughout his stomach. Bruce never got to see Jason actually die, he just held onto a corpse. But now holding onto his son while he’s dying is just so much worse. He cradles him just like he did the first time though. And Jason can’t hear Bruce’s words exactly, but he hears the word ‘son’ and that’s all he needs before he lets go. 

-Jason tries to get out the word ‘Dad’ but it gets stuck in his throat as a bubble of blood trickles down his lips instead. That image haunts Bruce for a while. 

-Tim’s death he sees it coming really. There’s a huge battle and no one’s really paying attention except to taking down the villains. Tim can feel himself bleeding out. He knows. But he keeps fighting, because that’s who Tim is. He’ll work himself to death and that’s exactly what he does. His body can’t keep up with his mind, he can feel every wound on his body but he pushes out the pain. Bruce finds him first. He’s under a pile of rubble and Bruce just sees a pale, bloody hand sticking out and he knows it’s Tim. He can’t see a face but he knows and his heart drops. He digs around in that rubble until he finds his son. He starts with CPR he peels off Tim’s cowl and his eyes are open and glazed over because Tim just never took a second to just rest so of course he dies with his eyes open. He’s gone and Bruce didn’t even get to say goodbye. He wishes he could tell Tim how much he helped him through, but the words are left unsaid. 

-(Though they are written down in a letter Bruce writes and leaves in Tim’s casket. But it’s not the same. It’s not enough. It’s not anything close to what Tim deserved.)

-Damian dies and its terrifying. It when he actually is in the bat-suit. He dies saving civilians and Bruce couldn’t be any prouder even though it hurts. Because that was his boy, his boy that was raised in the darkness and ended up in the light. Damian rushes in to guide as many people out of a burning building and he goes back in to save the villain. Bruce is in the Cave and they’re all begging Damian not to do it, his vitals are too low he can’t go in one more time his lungs will give out. Damian tuts under his breath and mutters a faint ‘justice, not vengeance’ before turning off his communicator and rushing in.  He makes it out with the villain in tow before collapsing. At least, that’s what the coroner’s report says as Bruce reads it over. 

(this got long so I’m stopping it right here. No worries though, the girls are coming up soon. I promise.)

Story idea

The year is 2064.  School shootings in America have increased exponentially with every passing year.  One school adopts a new approach to protecting their students: teaching them to catch bullets with their bare fucking hands.  The student body of Bulletproof High is fully trained and ready to send crime…to detention.

Wednesday 3rd February 2016 //

I’m back! Apologies for my absence. I’ve been studying a lot but haven’t really taken the time to document it recently. Here are some of my Mandarin notes from today. I went back and corrected some things and then carried on writing out the next couple of grammar lessons and vocabulary.

Korean is also going somewhat smoothly and kanji (for Japanese) is less scary to memorise nowadays! If I carry on working hard everything should go well. I’ve got this! Also I’m not ignoring your questions, don’t worry! I just haven’t had the time to respond properly, and I don’t think you guys deserve rushed answers so it might take a little time but I’ll get back to you all soon!

I’m also trying out a new kind of layout for my blog. What do you think? The design is still the same but I’m trying to add more content. Although I wanted to post nothing but original photos, a lot of the quotes and resources I’ve been seeing have been really helpful to me lately, and I think reblogging things like that could be helpful to you all too. (The images of notes and books will mostly be my own content though since this blog is a place to record my own progress.)

Thank you all for over 2000 followers! It’s not usually something that I pay a lot of attention to, but having such a large group of people supporting what I do means a lot! Thank you so much.


Stop looking around at what everyone else is doing or has!

So she got accepted to college before you ? So he got the job before anyone else?


You’ll get there soon.

Work at your own pace not others


It’s ok to be scared that you might not get your life together but trust me it’ll all play out

Just focus on you and work hard on you

If you have to do it all over or differently then go for it