mic has been dropped

anyway i just wanna say that i super hate that post that suggests people not liking the word queer being used as an umbrella term or not wanting to have the word queer used to describe them think that way because of terfs because theyre 20 years late to have ever had that word used as a slur against them

like i dont know about you and i cant speak for everyone, but before i came onto tumblr the only context i knew queer to be used in is when it was used a slur, and its not like im from an ultra-conservative rural part of the globe im from east london which is typically considered a pretty left wing place (whether or not it actually is im not going to discuss)

when i was 14 and just coming to the realisation that i was something other than straight i was forced into an uncomfortable situation of being forced to become comfortable with being called queer, even though i only knew it to be a slur, because the people who had been in the community longer than me used the word as an umbrella term and when i was young it seemed as though that was the only way i would be legitimate and validated in my non-straightness

ive had the word queer thrown at me as a slur, ive had to sit around a table with my homophobic then-boyfriend and his family talking about ‘the queers’ in a derogatory way and had to keep my mouth shut because i was 14 and i wasnt out. ive had the word queer thrown at me as a slur when i was 16/17/18 and i was in fact out and people wanted to hurt me

i dont know where it is you people are from that queer is never used a slur but id like you to tell me because id very much like to go there

and i know the argument that using queer as an umbrella term is okay because in the academic world theres an entire field of study called queer studies and you can shout that argument at me as much as you like, as if there’s nothing problematic or uncomfortable that goes on within the language used in academic spaces (i know several people who have issues with the use of the terms hebrew bible and judeo-christian, both of which are the go to phrases at my own university)

personally i have to disagree with the sentiment that ive been seeing from the community (especially older members of the community) that not using queer as an umbrella term is somehow regressive or handing the word back over to straight people because to me it feels a lot less about giving a word to straight people and a lot more about ignoring the experiences of a lot of lgbt+ people

people saying that a lot of the people who dont want to be referred to as queer are 20 years too late to have gone through that as a teenager are ignoring the very real experiences of young people who did go through that as a teenager, they’re ignoring my experiences, and i have to say the anger im seeing from older members of the community just because teenagers who have likely had queer used against them as a slur dont want to be called queer is 

please dont think im trying to say that no one should use the word queer to describe themselves ever because if you want to describe yourself as queer you 100% can do that, no one is trying to stop you, just please dont use it to refer to someone who doesnt want to be referred to it as because it is a slur and if you want to reclaim it then fine. but not everyone has reclaimed it and it doesn’t take a lot of effort to respect that 

I’m not saying that this is necessarily what was going on, because always things are Complicated with him, but all I am saying is that if any other character had said, “Think of me. Don’t worry about me,” the way that Hannibal says to Will that would be a BIG red flag that the character is putting serious thought into dying soon, either by creating a situation in which they will be killed or by their own hand.

Add to that Hannibal’s conviction when he tells Dolarhyde that “suicide is the enemy,” spoken so soon after Will’s ‘final’ mic drop has been followed up with an astonishing reprieve. Not just release from the cell, but the fulfillment of everything that Hannibal had given up almost everything to bring about. 

Like you just get a sense of how bad Hannibal’s mental state was during the three years and how much further it dropped when it seemed obvious that Will was going to walk away for good and all. 

ATTENTION *picks up mic*

STOP romanticizing mental illnesses!! It’s not funny or cute!

STOP faking mental illnesses! It’s not funny or cute!

STOP using your mental illness as an excuse for being rude or using slurs or cyber-bullying! It’s not an excuse or cute!

STOP making fun of people for having mental illnesses! It’s not funny or cute, it makes you an asshole!

STOP making people feel bad about themselves for having a mental illness! It’s not funny or cute!

STOP asking people for their “proof” or receipts for their diagnoses! it’s not cute or funny!

STOP being assholes to people who actually have it and say you have it when you don’t! It’s not funny or cute!

STOP laughing a people who have mental illnesses! It’s not funny or cute!

This has been a PSA *drops mic*

anonymous asked:

you keep saying that Fitz was trying to help Jemma, but then why make the date so romantic if it was supposed to be "friendly"? Jemma seemed really turned off by it and overwhelmed by the wine pouring and candles and stuff. It seems really tactless for Fitz to push all that romance on her and make her deal with him all of a sudden :/

Okay, anon. Prepare yourself for a pro-Fitz, pro-dinner rant.

First of all, you have to put this dinner in context. Fitz wanted to help Jemma, but after taking her to the lab and seeing her reactions to various stimuli, he was worried that he was doing more harm than good. How do I know this?

[x]

That’s how I know this. 

And when Fitz expressed this concern, here’s how Bobbi reacted:

[x]

But here’s the thing: Fitz and Simmons were already headed towards a fresh start, before all of this monolith nonsense. And they had a date! They were going to start navigating romantic waters together! And that is something very new for them, something that wasn’t about old!Jemma or even scientist!Jemma. It was Fitz’s idea of a new beginning.

And this might be the part where you’re thinking, slow down, Jane! This is exactly the kind of romance I was talking about! 

Well, not really. I mean, yes, they’re in a very romantic atmosphere. And they are having dinner together, which can count as a date, depending on your definition. But here’s another piece of context you’re missing:

[x]

Now, I need you to remember that when Fitz asked Jemma out for dinner, he didn’t tell her that he was taking her out to a specific restaurant—he said he had a few options to run by her. He picked out some places, but he was going to let her make the final decision. So what does that mean?

It means that Fitz made the reservation AFTER she went through the portal. 

And six months later, he still had it.

And I know that for me, if some rando made some kind of reservation at some restaurant when he knew I couldn’t be there, then kept it for six months, THEN cleared the entire place so it could be just us, I’d be pretty creeped out. But Fitz isn’t just some guy. Fitz is her best friend in the world. Fitz is the name she called through the sand storm. Fitz found her and brought her back, against all odds. Fitz is the person that she knows and trusts more than anyone in the world.

So when the waiter tells her that he’s held the reservation for that long, what does that tell Jemma? It tells her that even though they had their differences in the past, even though they fought for the majority of season two, and even though they had only recently become friends again, he never gave up on her and the plans they had together. He believed in her, against all odds, because he loves her that much. It tells her that she is worth fighting for.

And I think that broke her heart just a little bit, anon. You know why? Because in her mind, she didn’t return his loyalty, By her own admission, she lost hope at some point or another. And how could she not feel guilty about that? She’s Jemma Simmons, who of course doesn’t take into account the difference between her struggle and Fitz’s. She doesn’t consider that he has had more time to process his feelings, and therefore has a stronger foundation for them. She just sees that she gave up on him, and he didn’t give up on her.

And then, Fitz starts telling her that really, he’s just following her example, because she did this for him when he needed it. But in Jemma’s eyes, is that really on the same scale? After all, the dinner she had with Fitz didn’t go very well. He constantly complained, and maybe Jemma thought the whole thing had been a failure. Certainly, it wasn’t the same as clearing out the best restaurant in town.

But he did it, she knows, because he cares about her. And the realization is so overwhelming that she honestly doesn’t know how to respond to it. And she tells him so. And what does he say?

[x]

Now, anon, you have to look at his eyes when he says that. Look again. Sometimes in TV, the guy will say this exact phrase and mean, “Because I already know how you feel.” But that’s not what he’s saying here. He’s telling her that she doesn’t have to give him a response. And I think he’s about to say more, before he gets interrupted. I think he’s about to say that she doesn’t have to say anything, and she also doesn’t have to do anything. She doesn’t have to thank him, or feel indebted, or even love him back. That’s not what it’s about for Fitz. It’s about giving Jemma something to look forward to. It’s telling her that possibilities are there for her, if she wants them. I mean, just look at his eyes again, anon.

They hold a promise of things to come. 

The real difference between this dinner and a date date is that Fitz isn’t trying to get anything from Jemma in the way of affection or attention. He’s just trying to tell her that he knows she’s going to get better because he’s going to be there to help her every step of the way.

And I mean, the waiter is probably a good guy and all, but what kind of waiter asks for somebody’s order 3.5 seconds after they’ve been seated? For goodness sakes. Fitz cleared the restaurant, and Jemma is about as jumpy as a rabbit among a pack of wolves; they obviously want their space. HE is the real villain of this scene, anon, coming in there and making Jemma choose before she’s even taken a look at the menu because she was gazing into Fitz’s eyes. AND he spilled the beans on the whole reservations thing. If anybody is pushing anybody, it’s the waiter dude. And THEN he starts pouring the wine, and everything falls apart.

I know that some people have wondered what exactly it is that makes her break, but come on. It’s definitely the wine. She’s a little overwhelmed by the restaurant itself, by Fitz, by the menu, but it’s the wine that makes her cry. She’s unable to take her eyes off of it, and even Fitz notices, looking at the wine himself before asking her what’s wrong. 

And before you blame Fitz or even the waiter for triggering her with wine, let me just say this: nobody knew it would trigger her. Fitz has been very careful this far, clearing the restaurant after she says she gets distracted, downplaying his actions so as to not obligate her to thank him, saying that she did something just as kind to him when he needed it, telling her that he expects nothing in return. If she had shown some aversion to wine, don’t you think that he would have done something to prevent her from being triggered? But he doesn’t know about the wine because a) Jemma hasn’t told him everything and b) Fitz is not a psychologist. Fitz is a pretty smart guy, mind you, but he admitted that he doesn’t really know what he’s doing. And I’m not even sure that I understand why the wine triggered her. It could be because wine looks like blood, and there was something she had to kill on the planet. Or it could be this:

[x]

Seems like the last time she had wine was on the planet itself. 

Whatever the case, Jemma starts crying. And what does Fitz do? He makes sure that they’re alone, and he comforts her. He doesn’t ask her to stop. He doesn’t even ask why. He simply offers her his shoulder to cry on, showing clear respect for her trauma and her pain.

Because sure, they were going to become more than that, but they were best friends first. They were the most important person in each other’s world long before romance showed up. They have a foundation so strong that it has survived Ward, hypoxia, Hydra, Inhumans, SHIELD 2.0, and more. It will withstand whatever this is.

Because a guy doesn’t spend six months of his life working himself to death and hoping against hope to save someone because he wants to get lucky. He does that because he loves somebody more than anything, more than life, and she’s in mortal danger.

So that’s why I say that Fitz was doing all this to help her, anon. I say it because he has spent every waking moment of the past six months trying to help her. I say it because he has spent the previous two seasons trying to help her, from the Chitauri virus to rescuing her at the Hub to hiding his feelings to giving her the last breath to asking if anyone had heard from her to holding her hand when the other SHIELD invaded to keeping her safe when she started to lose her way. Fitz isn’t perfect, not by a long shot, but he wants Jemma to be safe and happy, and he has sacrificed extensively to ensure that she has to opportunity to do so.

And Jemma, for her part, has always done the same for him.