merican

'Merican
Descendents
'Merican

i come from the land of Ben Franklin
Twain, and Poe, and Walt Whitman 
Otis Redding, Ellington
the country that i love!
but it’s the land of the slaves and the Ku Klux Klan
Haymarket Riot and the Great Depression
Joe McCarthy, Vietnam
the sickest joke i know!

listen up man i’ll tell you who i am
just another stupid american
you don’t wanna listen, you don’t wanna understand
so finish up your drink and go home!

i’m proud and ashamed every 4th of July!
you’ve got to know the truth before you say that you’ve got pride.

These are some of my favorite lines from Come From Away

  • “I’ll write S.T.F.D. Slow the fuck down!”
  • “I need something to do ‘cause I can’t watch the news, no I can’t watch the news anymore”
  • “And when I get back Beulah says” “You know those planes are probably filled with women of childbearing age” “So…” “So I’m back to Shoppers”
  • “For the love of God stop bringing toilet paper to the Lion’s Club”
  • “You are freaking out and it’s freaking me out and we are all freaking 👏the fuck 👏out👏”
  • “Ya. that’s a moose”
  • “And that’s how we started speaking the same language”
  • “It’s like any of us could have died on Tuesday”
  • “But he just looks like a gay lumberjack”
  • “I’m Muslim and I was born in Connecticut. I’m an American citizen.” “You don’t look ‘Merican.” “What does that even mean!”
  • “Have you seen my boyfriend? His name is Kevin. He’s about this tall and he’s lost his mind.”
  • “And then they brought the cod.” “The cod” “The cod.” “The cod”
  • “The one thing I loved more than anything was used as the bomb.”

So it’s spirit week at school, aka homecoming week, and for those of you non-’mericans, basically everyday there’s a different theme that you have to dress to accordingly. Today was alphabet day, meaning you had to dress up as something that began either with the first or last letter of your name. So if your name is Anna, you could be an Angel. If your last name is Johnson, you could be a jellybean or whatever floats your booty. This one guy whose name is Payton went as patriotic and

this is literally what being American means

Not table top, but LARP (Dystopia Rising, a post apocalyptic LARPthat focuses more on roleplay and community than combat).

NPC : “You need to be realistic.”
Merican : “I am angry and armed!”
NPC : “I want you to calm down.”
Merican : *draws pistol* “And I want you six ounces heavier. Guess who’s the realist, now?”

WHAT UP EDUCHUM FAM.

For most of us ‘Merican tumblr teachers, Wednesday begins our Thanksgiving holiday.

Wednesday-Friday will therefore be Education Dare Day BONANZA. Recharge those teaching-batteries by tagging your #educhums with questions, stories, and get new ideas for your classes.

The goal? Ask a question yourself for reblogs and replies, and make a goal to answer as many as you can.  Tag them #educationdareday #edd and #educhums (because let’s face it: the actual education tag is forking worthless).

Reblog, mark your calendars, que those posts, and wear your friggin stretchy pants. 

OK so I’m in the USA right and so I decided what better way to experience some real MERICAN culture than to go to a fucking GUN STORE and oh wow guns are so… intimidating to be near… I was looking at the handguns and the guy behind the counter goes “so which ones would you like to hold?” and I’m like “I can touch them?” So he hands me a semi-automatic and I’m just so uncomfortable holding it. Exhibit A:

I asked what you’d use it for and he said “whatever you want.” The idea being to stop a tyrannical government but what about before that happens? Who knows! But their motto was you needed 4 guns: handgun for personal safety, shotgun to protect home (doesn’t the handgun do that too?), rifle for putting food on the table (he also gave me a handgun and said you could hunt with it so, again, handgun does that too sometimes?), and then the semi-automatic for fun/fighting tyranny. I held them so awkwardly. They’re heavy but…. not AS heavy as I anticipated? So weird.

So yeah. MERICA. That’s what my adventures into rural America have been thus far. Next time I’m going to go see some horses and maybe if I’m (un)lucky I’ll see some genuine red blooded American nazis.

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This past weekend I went to Dystopia Rising Pennsyltucky again. I had an amazing time and got to shoot some footage as well as photos of the players. My favorite side of DR is the beautiful props that players come up with. From News Papers delivered from one town to the next, to shields made to represent a person’s heritage. Looking forward to going back in May. <3