would you mind if i screenshotted the unwanted/unasked for critique of your animations??? if i ever made a post on how unhelpful/counterproductive they can be to artists (especially to mentally ill artists), I'd just like to use the asks you get as examples. Its fine if not though!! (ps, i think ur stuff's amazing, keep creating!)
yea dude sure
a lot of people really mean well but like if theres some flaw they think i mightve glazed over, i have guaranteed already overthought about it a hundred times before it even occurred to them
like i know theres issues with my art style and with the content i create and with the direction ive been going in as a whole, but i mean its still stuff i made and as much as i hate it i still gotta post it because thats just life, if i didnt post anything i wasnt satisfied with my channel would be empty. if i deleted videos i think show a trend towards a direction i dont wanna head anymore, theyd all be deleted.
i know these flaws exist but i’m letting them exist so i can keep pushing on; and i guess its easy to mistake that for me being unaware of them but like as much time as i pour into a 20 second video i PROMISE u i am hyper aware of everything and unless im asking for criticism i really rly rly would appreciate if people just refrained.
Lets Start Here: Mental Health and Artistic Expression.
What does it mean to you?
Art speaks for itself. The arousing joys and sensational trauma to execute suppressed thoughts and feelings in an imaginative piece. It challenges the abnormal and normal and often stigmatises the artist to be crazy and weird. The tortured or struggling artist is a myth in this digital age with the emergence of bloggers, vloggers, illustrators, musicians, comedians on social media platforms where you have the freedom to express yourself. Essentially unlocking creative abilities. For instance blogging, or writing in general is a great skill to share your voice and story. But there are also pitfalls in the journey. The writers’ life of any form can be lonely, stressful (particularly in writers block stages) and makes room for rumination. Despite those downfalls, it is also, very therapeutic.
With the concern of mental health across the board in recent news and open dialogue across social media platforms it is widely known and pondered that there seems to be a link between creativity and mental illness, and does it help to have a creative interest to cushion depression or other illnesses on the mental health spectrum. It’s apparent that there is a distinction with writers being attacked by depression, which can either kill their art or be a catalyst to therapeutically create. Authors, J.K Rowling, James Baldwin, Stephen King or Sylvia Plath (to name a few) poured their maladjusted mind frames and moments of depression into novels, using that glimmer of hope to fight their bleak circumstances into words to escape their reality. For them suffering from depression manifested artistic and beautiful prose leading them to be adored writers in literature.
However, this isn’t the story of every writer or artist. Albert Rothenberg, professor of psychiatry at Harvard University debunks the mental illness and creativity connection, alluding that “It’s the romantic notion of the 19th century, that the artist is the struggler, aberrant from society, and wrestling with inner demons. But take Van Gogh. He just happened to be mentally ill as well as a creative.” He goes onto say, “For me, the reverse is more interesting: creative people are generally not mentally ill, but they use thought processes that are of course creative and different.” Kari Stefansson, founder of a genetics company, deCode said on his findings on a common biology for mental disorders and creativity that “To be creative, you have to think differently, and when we are different, we have the tendency to be labelled strange, crazy and even insane.” There are a lot of facets to creativity connected with mental health theory; a common thread in studies and research is that being creative equates to being different, and this can prove to be challenging to the artist and the mind.
To create is to bring something into existence. Artistically, it’s to bring something into existence without rules, just lots and lots of passion and talent. Story-telling is one of my passions whether it’s watching, reading or writing stories. I like reading a novel and turning the pages to gain a deeper understanding of the characters’ lives, knowing their thoughts, actions and how they reach a resolution. To write stories, it starts off with a ‘what if…’ ‘What if… their different personalities became a romantic journey?’ or ‘what if… a teenage girl ran away from home and went on an adventure?’ Art intimates life and people are interested in different walks of life. In my debut novel, Don’t tell me you love me, my ‘what if…’ explored, ‘what if… a young man in his mid-20s made a discovery about his past and how it affected his relationship with family, friends and the women he dates?’ I thoroughly enjoyed the process developing characters and plot to tell a meaningful story with a purpose, which I can actually side with the notion that creativity, specifically writing, is a great outlet. Although there are studies that suggest creative people are at high risk of a mental illness challenging their ‘different’ and ‘what is normal’ concepts. It’s actually an opening for an audience to experience an original perspective celebrated in a piece(s) of artistic expression.
Her single “Chained to the Rhythm” is a cheerfully depressing indictment of not only Trump but all of society. Lo, the singer most associated with poorly trained shark dancers and weaponized bras and the last forthright celebration of homophobia on the pop charts has mentally molted: “Artist. via Pocket
This thing is one of the creatures I saw around my house once.
I have mental illnesses and parts of them seem to come out as hallucinations and illusions. This is something I have seen, at least partially. It is hard to draw things afterward.
My doctor says only a few of my hallucinations are true hallucinations. Where as some are illusions. I do believe her, and I understand that it is possible through certain things that “normal” people can have hallucinations. I’m diagnosed with bipolar and PTSD though. The interaction of which might be causing the things I see or the things I feel are there.
I still don’t know that my doctor truly believes me. She said she does not believe I am disabled enough to be on SSDI. I’m not sure I qualify either. I think I am just on the “being able to work part time but full time is very difficult” line. This isn’t good because it means I don’t have a lot of means to support myself. I am hoping that if it comes down to that my doctor will support me.
In the meantime I use the things I see in my writing and art. I am hoping that somehow this will help me be less afraid. In the meantime I hope I can begin to express what things I believe are full hallucinations and what aren’t. I am still having trouble believing that I actually have hallucinations. Sometimes I think they just happen because I am missing time and I feel something happened then. Sometimes I don’t think I remember them clearly enough, or that the duration was to short. Either way this does greatly affect the art that I do and it also hopefully will continue to be an outlet for me.
Being an artist and mentally ill certainly has affected my way to do witchy things!
I don’t do so much of the clearly defined spells, or at least I don’t see them that way. I don’t specifically decide to do a spell that often, it just happens. It’s been that way since I can remember. I’m a very visual thinker and most of my work is based on either visualizing or art, in one way or another. I sometimes do sigils (though not in the usually instructed way of combining letters in a sentence, that just doesn’t work for me), and put those or drawn things and little reminders in the inside covers of my notebooks and sketchbooks and seal them with fixative. I do tattoos on myself, always with a specific purpose in mind, and always with the same setup and almost-ritual I count as a spell. I make little bracelets and anklets and things and concentrate on something I want to achieve while making them. I whisper compliments to my plants when taking care of them, and sometimes just because it feels like they could need some encouragement. For me, the creative process is something very natural, and also very magical in its core. It’s a part of who I am, and many of the things I do could be classified as magical although they’re not overtly and obviously so.
My witchcraft is secular - I’m a gaelic polytheist but I don’t associate my craft with that, though I do take influences. I draw a lot of inspiration for my art from mythology and fairytales, and that translates to art and magic. I’m also just generally superstitious to some extent, and for example prefer to cut my hair during the new/growing moon. I say hello when entering places that just have that vibe.
To me, magic is a language through which I communicate with the world. It’s sometimes hard these days, when everything in my daily life is simultaneously controlled and chaotic at the same time. I often feel disconnected and lonely, and I suppose magic is one of the ways I cope with those feelings.
A little photo story of how I went from polaroid to painting. I took this picture on New Years Eve and fell in love with the transition of colours that were the result of a long exposure shot of a string of fairy lights. Back home, I grabbed my acrylics, inks, pencils and pastels and began to recreate that very energy of colours. I have been working on this canvas a couple of ours every other day for about three weeks now and it has already changed faces so many times. That’s what I love about painting. Piling on the layers and watching the painting grow and transform.
Painting teaches me everyday to let go of the fear of change, that sometimes you have to destroy in order to create, and that it is no use to hold on to a set action plan you made some time in the past, because while working on that plan you are naturally going to grow/develop, learn new skills, acquire new insights so it is only logical (and good!) that the plan has to be adjusted and revised accordingly. Sometimes even to the extend of a completely different outcome…
I used to see this as a failure, being inconsequent, never finishing things. Now I know it’s in fact the exact opposite. I am working hard and I am actually progressing. I am making tiny steps forward each and every time I paint, read a book, find a new source of inspiration, educate myself. Every day I am seeing my world from an ever so slightly different angle. And that’s why today I am standing tall, head held high, in front of my painting that started out as a magical array of colours and has since somehow developed into a pile of earthworms. It’s ok. I know it will change again. Just like my action plan.
Have a good day!
For more of my work and thoughts connect with me on instagram :) ITSSTEFA