This past week has been the shitty week of my life, so much so it even affected my personal relationship, with the one person. I though would be there for me and be there for me no matter, however this horror story of an experience of mine. Has taught me no matter how much you think someone cares about you or you thought they cared somewhat for you. At the end of the day you’ll be end up alone and surrounded by a bunch of savages, that you use to call you crew. No matter how much you think you have someone in your world. Your world crashes down on you, when they can’t fight the good fight with you and you end up covered in blood, battling it out on your own.
After a slight nervous breakdown last week, which left me in a dark hole
of nowhere, that no even the most power light could find the end of
that endless black tunnel. I feel somewhat better about myself and I’m
not lying to myself or whoever read this thing. I legit realized, that
even though things weren’t what they seem to be (at least in my sad
little mind), that doesn’t mean, that there’s any lemonade to be made
from this experience. Sure, it took a lot of liquor, candy and crying
like a little bitch to my friends to have this moment of clarity.
However, as a good friend said to me “It’s sometimes the bad moments in
life, which are gifts”! Now, while I might consider that to be bullshit,
I took it with a grain of salt and just ate it up, because while all
this shit maybe happening now. There’s some kind of reason why I can’t
have what I want now, but when I do, I think that would be the biggest
gift of all. I just can’t wait to unwrap it already!
I’m not a sucker for romance or meeting the one you were meant to be with. I thing, shit like that is make believe and is embedded into suckers heads. To make them feel better about there lonely lives, like there’s someone wait for you, you just have to wait and see. That’s just bullshit, because I thought, I had found the one I found. It turned out the be out to be more of a nightmare than anything else. At first it started out nice and somewhat amazing, then the true colors of himself started to bleed out every time he opened he’s mouth and basically started shredding my character. I don’t need another negative person in my life, I have to a many of those already. I won’t lie and say that it doesn’t hurt when you have this imagine in your head of what the two of you could have been. However, it was nice while it lasted and now it time to move on to something better!