Wanna make an adventure story about a True Value employee teaming up with an Ace Hardware employee; they hate eachother at first but put aside their differences to fight the big-box hardware stores (Home Depot, Lowes, Menards); maybe some hardware demons or intense hardware fighting scenes would be fun.

I got this idea from the “Home depot garden center boss fight theme” or whatever post that was

Signs as Shit Me or My Brothers Have Said

Aries: *at Menards in the light switch section* You need a way to switch off your anger. (My brother)

Taurus: Give me more Sugar Daddy Stark. (Me)

Gemini: You’re not DW. You’re more like Mr. Ratburn. (My youngest brother)

Cancer:  When I say I like ‘em thicc, this is what I mean. *shows a plate of crispy chicken wings* (My brother)

Leo: Women smell perfume like people smell flowers. Men smell perfume like people do drugs. (My brother)

Virgo: Grape is the driest bitch. (Me)

Libra: “Is that the monkey from The Powerpuff Girls?” “NO, IT’S PICCOLO FROM DRAGON BALL.” (My brother and I)

Scorpio: Me? Get in a fight against Bats? Nah, man. I’m here to get in a knife fight with God. (Me)

Sagittarius: R.I.P. Our Lord and Savior, Lightning McQueen. (Me)

Capricorn: Real men takes notes with graph paper. (My brother)

Aquarius:  The sword is about as straight as you are. (My brother)

Pisces: I cut myself woodworking more than an emo kid. (My brother)

|| Please don’t be offended. We just have a rude sense of humor.||

“best of” reading list: encyclopedic novels, metafiction, & hypertext fiction.

the encyclopedic novel is a literary concept popularized by edward mendelson in two 1976 essays (“encyclopedic narrative” and “gravity’s encyclopedia”). in mendelson’s formulation, encyclopedic novels “attempt to render the full range of knowledge and beliefs of a national culture, while identifying the ideological perspectives from which that culture shapes and interprets its knowledge”. qualities include “accounts of at least one technology or science”, extensive use of synecdoche, and the display of “an encyclopedia of literary styles, ranging from the most primitive and anonymous levels … to the most esoteric of high styles”. metafiction is a a genre of fiction, wherein a fictional work self-consciously draws attention to being a work of imagination, rather than a work of non-fiction; and about the process by which fiction makes the author’s statements. metafiction poses philosophic and critical questions about the relation between fiction and reality, usually by applying irony and self-reflection. hypertext fiction is an evolving genre of electronic literature, characterized by the use of hypertext links that provide a new context for non-linearity in literature and reader interaction. while some use this to primarily describe the new subset of reading known as “choose-your-own adventure” books, i find the name most aptly suits describing stories in which a nonlinear narrative and interactive narrative is achieved through internal references. after being in a book* hangover for the longest time after reading homestuck, i feared that i’d never be satisfied with anything less complex and that i’d never be quite so absorbed by something afterward! these genres have seen me through that. if you prefer linear plots and dickensian, “god bless us, every one” style endings these probably aren’t for you, but they’re right up the alley of anyone who prefers rich complexity (and often a certain degree of smugness) to works and is getting tired of commonplace literary and general fictional conventions, on the hunt for… a new frontier. these genres are not necessarily interconnected, but i find that they often are, especially in these works. they’re also all closely tied to postmodernism, if you’re looking for further reading


  • don quixote - miguel de cervantes
  • the canterbury tales - geoffrey chaucer
  • jacques the fatalist - denis diderot
  • the history of tom jones, a foundling - henry fielding
  • the private memoirs and confessions of a justified sinner - james hogg
  • the life and opinions of tristram shandy, gentleman - laurence sterne
  • northanger abbey - jane austen
  • vanity fair - william makepeace thackeracy
  • london fields - martin amis
  • the handmaid’s tale - margaret atwood
  • the new york trilogy - paul auster
  • chimera - john barth
  • lost in the funhouse - john barth
  • one for the morning glory - john barnes
  • the divine comedy - dante
  • the mezzanine - nicholson baker
  • the savage detectives - roberto bolaño
  • 2666 - roberto bolaño
  • the garden of forking paths - jorge luis borges
  • short stories of jorge luis borges including “tlön, qqbar, orbis tertius”, “the book of sand”, “pierre menard, author of the quixote”, and “the library of babel”
  • naked lunch - william s. burroughs
  • second thoughts - michel butor
  • possession: a romance - a.s. byatt
  • if on a winter’s night a traveler - italo calvino
  • hopscotch - julio cortázar
  • little, big - john crowley
  • house of leaves - mark z. danielewski
  • s. - j.j. abrams, doug dorst
  • foucalt’s pendulum - umberto eco
  • the name of the rose - umberto eco
  • a heartbreaking work of staggering genius - dave eggers
  • the “malazan book of the fallen” series - steven erikson
  • the eyre affair - jasper fforde
  • sophie’s world - jostein gaarder
  • one hundred years of solitude - gabriel garcía márquez
  • grendel - john gardner
  • the counterfeiters - andré gide
  • book: a novel - robert grudin
  • the curious incident of the dog in the night-time - mark haddon
  • ulysses - james joyce
  • gödel, escher, bach: an eternal golden braid - douglas hofstadter
  • the unbearable lightness of being - milan kundera
  • therapy - david lodge
  • with the people from the bridge (poena damni book 2) - dimitris lyacos
  • underworld - don delillo
  • life of pi - yann martel
  • atonement - ian mcewan
  • finnegan’s wake - james joyce
  • cloud atlas - david mitchell
  • kafka on the shore - haruki murakami
  • moby-dick - herman melville
  • severel of the “discworld” novels by terry pratchett
  • faust - johann wolfgang von goethe
  • the people of paper - salvador plascencia
  • pale fire - vladimir nakobov
  • the things they carried - tim o’brien
  • at swim-two-birds - flann o’brien
  • haunted - chuck palahniuk
  • diary - chuck palahniuk
  • gold bug variations - richard powers
  • the book of the book - idries shah
  • the double - josé saramago
  • gravity’s rainbow - thomas pynchon
  • the cantos - ezra pound
  • slaughterhouse-five - kurt vonnegut
  • brief interviews with hideous men - david foster wallace
  • war and peace - leo tolstoy
  • orlando - virginia woolf
  • the fifth head of cerberus - gene wolfe
  • the castle of crossed destinies - italo calvino

comics & comic series:

  • watchmen - alan moore and dave gibbons, dc
  • animal man - grant morrison, dc
  • deadpool - various (especially cullen bunn’s work), marvel
  • unbeatable squirrel girl - various, marvel
  • cerebus the aardvark - dave sim
  • homestuck - andrew hussie, mspa
  • understanding comics - scott mccloud

feel free to mssg me suggestions of things to add! im thinking of doing a watchlist of films and maybe shows for this as well so if ur interested… lmk