My outward personality when first meeting someone is so malleable that if for some reason someone doesn’t like me at first, it’s probably because I misread them. I’m not sure if this makes me “fake” or not, but I’m incapable of presenting my true personality when meeting someone new.
“I just came from playing board games; there isn’t a day more fun than the one like today.” “Did you play the board games with your friends?” “No, everyone met each other for the first time through this group.” “Did you all know each other through a board game cafe?” “No, we all came together separately through an ad to play board games on the Internet.” “Do you usually meet strangers like this a lot?” “No, this is the first time I’ve tried something like this.”
“방금 보드게임을 하고 오는 길인데, 오늘만큼 재밌던 날이 없었던 것 같아요.” “친구들하고 보드게임을 하셨나봐요?” “아니요. 전부 처음 보는 사람들이었어요.” “그 보드게임 카페에서 알게 된 사람들인가요?” “아니요. 인터넷에서 보드게임하자고 따로 나와 만난 사람들이에요.” “평소에 낯선 사람들을 자주 만나시나봐요?” “아니요. 저도 처음 시도해봤어요.”
In the last few weeks many of you have emailed me asking about “safe” places on the internet to meet people. While I’ve responded on a one-on-one basis with quite a few of you, many anons have also sent me the same question. Below you will find some sites as well as SAFETY tips when dating online.
Please remember, I am not an expert nor should you only do the suggestions below. You are smart, attractive and intelligent. Treat yourself with respect and expect it from others. BE SAFE & Keep On, Keeping On! -R.
1.) Always be cautious and aware of any and all personal information you give out online
2.) Never supply the place you work or where you live online
3.) Think before you give out your number. Correspond through email or messaging first. If your email is a school/work email or has your full name in the title, create an email used strictly for communication online.
4.) IF YOU MEET IN PERSON
- Do it during daylight hours and in a public space
- Tell a friend/family member/co-worker that you care going out and have someone call and check on you at a later time that day
- If possible, do NOT share a vehicle when you first meet. This is for everyone’s safety.
If a person is not comfortable or pushes you to break any of the above suggestions, it could be a sign of an unsafe situation.
If I’m meeting you for the first time and there’s even a sliver of a chance that we will become close enough to communicate via text message, I want to know your primary definition of “LOL.” I want to know if you’re the kind of person who tosses it out with no regard for what that acronym can do to a person’s ego. If we’re texting and I say something somewhere in the area code of funny, are you going to throw me a “LOL” bone, or are you withholding your “LOL"s until I one day say something so goddamned hysterical that the only way to convey the level of nonstop hilarity you’re in the midst of is by reducing the English language to base elements, hoping just three letters can encapsulate the euphoric laughter you’re experiencing?
In the very beginning, there is the witty banter, the checking one
another out, the refreshingly easy laughs. A sort of meta-evaluator in
my head is watching and saying, “Oh wow, okay. Huh. This is really fun.”
The time is flying, the equivalent of Csikszentmihalyi’s flow,
but for friendship. And then there is this “click” moment where I just
know that I’ve met one of my people. My meta-evaluator says, “I’m
totally into her. I hope she’s into me.” I get a little nervous. It
feels good to be nervous.