More humans being humans
Ok, guys, don’t know if this has been done before either, but I’ve had my second (2nd) idea about humans being weird.
Just, what the fuck, right?
There are some things I personally can do decently with both hands. I’m an excellent typist, for instance, and I don’t think either of my hands are more proficient at it than the other. Video game controllers. Occasionally, there are things I can do just left-handed.
But in general, it’s insane that the mirror image of my right hand can’t do shit.
I wouldn’t go so far as to say my writing is legible with my right hand, but I can read it, and I can write small and quickly. My left hand goes slow and makes a disaster on the paper. Throwing, using a paintball gun, everything feels super awkward trying to do it left-handed to the point that I don’t even try.
So the aliens meet us. It’s pretty cool (except for when our space lawyers ruin everything; see my other post). And hey, these humans can be pretty useful and intelligent, let’s do some joint ventures as shows of good faith and getting to know each other.
We’re on the aliens’ ship. Every time we’re carrying something and come up to that one door, we grumble to ourselves as we either awkwardly change hands or attempt to reach across to hit the button to open the door. Humans always sit on the one side of the table, and if they don’t, they’re either elbowing their alien buddy or sending food all over the place. So, the aliens naturally assume humans just evolved to use that hand for everything for some reason, even though that makes no sense, they look identical?
And then the lefties show up. Doing everything mirrored. The aliens had thoughtfully made some conversion kits to help the humans out, but now these ones need the mirror image or else their productivity is just shot. But then there’s Susan, and she can use whatever hand she wants for everything? Why aren’t all the humans like Susan? Or at least using the same hand? How do we explain that to them?
“Oh, yeah, when we’re born, we’re basically programmed to probably use only one hand, picked mostly at random but favouring the right side. Yeah, I don’t think about it much. Hey, can I take that chair, I don’t want to knock over your plate while we eat.”