meat self

attention college freshmen/anyone feeding themselves for the first time

this is for you

it has come to my attention that some people are not feeding themselves properly bc they don’t know how to cook/aren’t sure how to cook on a budget. bc i am everyone’s mom (or at least everyone’s wise older sister) let me drop some very real Broke Rookie Cooking Knowledge. 2 of my favorite recipes are under the cut, both of which come out to $2 OR LESS PER SERVING.

-MAKE a MENU. pick out like 5 things you know how to make and buy JUST WHAT YOU NEED FOR THOSE THINGS. and also a few snacks, but otherwise, JUST THAT. don’t just buy some random-ass groceries you think you’ll need. (also, if you don’t know how to make 5 things, seriously just google simple dinner recipes. i used a “mississippi heirloom cookbook” my aunt gave me and got a ton of good ones.)

-tbh i don’t even buy snacks except for a giant box of cookies that lasts me like 2 weeks at a time and an assload of apples. snacking is bad for you, and if you don’t HAVE snacks, you can’t EAT snacks. fuck snacks.

-off-brand EVERYTHING. you think you can taste a difference? you CAN’T. get shit in cans. vegetables. pasta sauce. salsa. whatthefuckever. it all comes in cans, and it’s always cheaper. i have no idea why.

-whole grain bread and brown rice/pasta are not more expensive than the regular kind, and they keep you full longer. GET THEM.

-@ my americans, Dollar Tree has literally everything. every kitchen utensil. (it’s where i got my big-ass chef’s knife, and that bitch is still sharp.) dishes/cups. snacks. drinks. literal loaves of bread. all kinds of basics, from peanut butter to sriracha to progresso soup. some even have freezer sections. all for ONE DOLLAR. go to Dollar Tree first, then go to the grocery store for whatever you couldn’t find there. i s2g it saves me so much money. (they also have tupperware, cleaning supplies, toilet paper, EVERYTHING. for one dollar.)

-produce is way cheaper than you think. get some fresh vegetables. you really will start to feel like a bag of hot garbage if you don’t eat your veggies.

-COOK in ADVANCE. i work during the day and go to school in the evenings, then i come home and work out. lemme tell you, my ass does NOT wanna cook when im done with all that. cook shit in big quantities, stock up on tupperware (dollar treeeeee), and stick it in the fridge for later. when you’re exhausted and remember you have instant dinner already made, you will want to kiss yourself.

-find some sandwiches you love. make a lot of sandwiches. (pls for the love of God dont use kraft american singles tho. deli-sliced cheese is literally right next to it, and it is NOT more expensive.)`

-FUCK organic free-range shit. you got organic free-range money? GREAT. i sure as hell don’t, and neither do most people. don’t waste your money trying to live your foodstagram #goals while you’re young and poor.

-if you qualify for SNAP/EBT, GET THAT SHIT. there are some assholes out there that will tell you not to, to leave it for the ~real~ poor people. tell them, ‘motherfucker I AM REAL POOR.’ for real though, corporations take advantage of any assistance the government gives them and they still lobby for more. you’d be a fool not to do the same. 

now some cheap-ass recipes

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I appreciate that climate change gets a lot of attention (possibly because it has the potential to have the highest economic costs if left unchecked) but it is my duty to remind everyone that the biggest threat to wildlife and ecosystems today is habitat loss. Not climate change. Not trophy hunting. Not even pollution–though a habitat can become so degraded from pollution that it becomes unusable.

The very best way to curb global destruction of habitat is to implement large-scale changes to our development patterns, energy production, and agricultural system. So be sure to support those efforts politically. You can also support sustainable, multi-use development in your communities(many municipalities talk about community-wide projects at city counsel meetings!). Live densely. Eat less meat. Call out self driving cars for the sprawl-supporting pact with satan that they are. Support public transportation! Don’t support sprawl and McMansions! Recognize that suburbia in general and lawns in particular are a facsimile of greenness that destroy actual usable habitat and replace it with sterile monocultures that require gallons of water, pesticides, and fertilizer to maintain. Stop using products with neonicotinoids altogether. Make your yard wildlife-friendly. Consider a brush pile. Keep your damn cats indoors. Plant native plants. Remove invasive plants. Maybe don’t freak out and call animal control every time you see a bat or snake or coyote in your neighborhood since they were literally there first and we’ve left them no place else to go. Watch out for herps crossing the roads in the breeding season, especially our salamanders. Plant a NATIVE tree. Support your local parks, forests, and waterways, big and small. 

so i’ve noticed how fast these seem to get the word out, so here goes nothing. this is a brand new MONKEY D. LUFFY blog borne the same day as the man himself! && if you’d like to roleplay or what have you please like or reblog this post so i can moosey on over to check out && follow you guys! 

the film which you are about to see is an account of the tragedy which befell a group of FIVE YOUTHS. it is all the more  t r a g i c  in that they were young. but had they lived very, very long lives, they could not have expected, nor would they have wished to see as much of the MAD  &  MACABRE  as they were to see that day. for them, an idyllic summer afternoon became a   n i g h t m a r e. over 1,300 pieces of evidence were collected from the crime scene at THE HEWITT RESIDENCE. the events of that day were to lead to one of the most   b i z a r r e   c r i m e s   in the annals of american history - THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE.

northernweird  asked:

Yeen, as an avid collector of FORBIDDEN KNOWLEDGE, I must ask you what people meats you consider least edible? A top 10 would be nice.

WORST OF MEATS

SORVOS AN THOPS HAVE BAD CRUNCH

VELDORBINS HAVE FUNNY TASTE AFTER EATING

MERFOLKS HAVE TOO MUCH THE FISHT TASTES YEEN WOULD RATHER JUST EAT FISH THAN SALTY HUMAN

GIANTS MEATS SMEL

YEEN HAS TRIED TO EAT A LEONINS BUT THEY CLAW LOTS. MAKES THIS VER DIFFICULT AN DOES NOT EAT SO YEEN ASSUMES MEAT TASTES LIKE TOUGH

AETHERBURNS TASTE LIKE CHALK AN DUST IS LIKE EATING A GROS DIRT

GERM FROM METAL PLACE TASTE GROS AN MAKE UNPLEASANT POP IN MOUTH

OH! ZOMBS ARE A BAD TOO. WERE ALREADY DEAD BUT NOW NOT?? MEAT NOT EVEN QUALITY IS BAD

GNOLL MEAT FORBIDDEN BY SELF NOT AGAIN

ELF MEATS MOST FLAVORLESS AN BAD OF ALL MEATS YEEN DONOT WANT

nenekobasu  asked:

when louis says early on that there are things that he's not going to bring up... i'm not going to ask what he's hiding because that's way to broad, but does louis give any clues to what sort of things he's hiding? he said "close to his heart", but claudia seemed to be the closest thing, so i'm lost.

YAY A QUESTION!

Well. Wellllll. This is a difficult thing, because Louis literally never speaks again for the rest of the series.

No joke. 13 books and counting, and Louis never gets a legitimate, unfiltered/non-manipulated POV ever again. So we must… conjecture.

Pls strap in 4 Queer Reading thx.

Claudia was certainly Louis’s biggest DISCUSSED emotional connection, true. She was the person he loved most unreservedly, but I think the key is that he doesn’t regret loving her, nor feel shame for doing so. He can compartmentalize and rationalize his adoration of her through various familial and gendered filters; he’s comfortable loving people he can class as “family” (see: Paul) and people he can present as heterosexual with (see: Babette). He is secure in expressing his love and his mourning, even where it’s complicated, because she still exists within structures that affirm Louis’ own “appropriate” social role and identity.

By contrast… we get almost nothing about the time with Lestat when there was relative calm, a measly 10 pages for 70 years of family. We get even less relating to his time with Armand. What we DO get is Cliff’s Notes of conflict, and heavily glossed at that. For a burn book on his exes, Louis says remarkably little about his feelings for them while actually affiliated. Descriptions of attraction and romantic desire are relegated to two things:
1. Mesmeric courtship phases, when (later books reveal) Louis was psychically out of his depth and clearly hypnotized into more intense levels of feeling; then, he can lay it off on the idea of “temptation” and thus part of his fall away from moral laws and rules, at the hands of outside influences he fails to resist
2. Regretful post-breakup reminiscences, when the affiliation is dead and he is able to look upon these men as people he once felt something for, but has now moved away from; thus, he is no longer in danger of acting upon or expressing those desires

In each case, there is most of a century of elapsed time elided. Time when he was close to his partners, though not necessarily *happy* in either case–both due to those relationships being inherently exploitative/abusive, and due to his own inherent and unmanaged depression. Time between those initial blooms of attraction and captivation, and the later regret and loss. Time where they hurt him, and were *able* to hurt him because he on some level allowed them access to his life, heart, mind, and body.

This is something I’ve had to discuss with many students: If you want a reader to care about a breakup, you need to convey why you loved a partner in the first place. Otherwise the chronicled loss rings hollow and empty.

Furthermore, both of his lovers are still somehow alive so far as he knows, while Claudia is dead–and Louis beatifies the dead, quite literally in Paul’s case.

How guilty and disgusted with himself must he feel, to have loved them?

To have wanted them?

To have remained with them, accepting their touches and needs and closeness, despite all he knows of them and their actions?

They killed his daughter. They killed him. They changed him and mutated him, helped him become the thing he is in the present–and even when he raged and railed, he still felt tenderness and affection. Still let them near, for the sake of fear and want and loneliness. And he has no access to any resources that could help him process any of that. No guide but his own convictions of morality and nihilism.

Louis, I believe, refuses to delve fully into the in-moment meat of his self-loathing and queerness with Daniel, the “boy” reporter he picked up in a bar in San Francisco and seduced through a night of lengthy recitation and growing personal nakedness. He builds an intimacy and rapport, but does not truly touch the roots of his own uneasiness with his place outside the normal run of the world, the way he was always “at odds with everything.”

Who wants dumb, stupid, inaccurate, college AU, self-indulgent idek?  *sniggers*  No really, I don’t even know.  I just decided to write things and see what came out, and this is what did.  That is why they are drabbles, I suppose.

Prompt: ‘i’m in my underpants in a laundromat waiting for my clothes to get washed and your clothes are in the machine next to mine and i noticed that when you put your clothes in they were all covered in blood what the fuck’ au

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Good Girl! - Part 4

Summary: Werewolf!Reader Story. Readers a young doctor and uses her skills to keep her condition hidden, until she transfers to the Enterprise and tries to deceive a certain grumpy Doctor

Bones x Reader

Wordcount: 1295

A/N: We’re slowly getting into the story.. or are we?

This fiction is set in AOS

Warnings: Maybe body horror for some ppl? There is an f-bomb too.

PART 1 PART 2 PART 3

When you woke up the next morning you were still changed, but didn’t mind. You had a free shift and despite your confinement, you felt pretty good. Everything was somewhat fuzzy in your head, but that was how things were as a wolf.
Human thoughts did not fully translate to wolf thoughts and vice versa. You got up, stretched your hind legs and ruffled the fur in your neck - more to see if you could do it, then to display anything in particular. Tapping through your room with the gentle click-click of your claws on the artificial ground you found a piece of meat your human self had left for you.
There was still the urge to run in your body, the urge to hunt and be free, wind on your nose - but you had the vague but persisting feeling that this was not possible. You remembered mating with someone the night before and it filled your body with excitement and content. You hadn’t done so in a long time and just like repressing the urge to run, it was not healthy. Your wolf self knew that as well as your human self, but was more willing to admit it. The dark eyed doctor had been your partner, something you’d never expected. But if everything went according to your wolf self, there’d be a lot of places on this ship you and the Doctor could use to explore each other. You bared your teeth and snarled.

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Wednesday. Mid April. 2017. Manhattan. 11:37 pm.

It’s a cold night with a light drizzle. Dim lights gently touch the street. I walk by a couple giggling about something. Most likely an inside joke.

I began to think about my relationship, or lack there of. “Meat” I whisper.

I step into my favorite diner. I sit at the bar. And began scanning the menu.

“What would you like?” the waitress asked.

“Apple pie,” I said. The waitress nodded and went into the kitchen.

I began to scan the diner. There’s a couple in the corner sharing a late night milkshake. A women reading a book and drinking a cup of coffee. Besides that it’s mostly empty. I turn my focus to my phone. Not much happing there either.

The waitress returns with a slice of pie and places it in front of me.

“Here you go,” she said. “Anything else?”
“No. Thank you,” I said. She nodded and walked away.

I eat half my pie before I hear the bell ring. Its Meat. I turn back and try to focus on my pie. She sat down next to me. I feel my breath leave my lungs. She orders a coffee to go.

She looked at me. “Hey Puthy.” She says. I swallow.

“Hey” I say with a smile.

“Here you go.” The waitress says.

The waitress gives her a coffee. Meat pays for the coffee and walks towards to the door. She turns and smiles again. Then she’s gone.

“Meat…” I whisper to my self “fucking Meat”

Important Deacon Facts
  • is 60+ years old
  • is scared of heights
  • the Institute has no clue who he is
  • knows a ton about pre-war living
  • wishes The Railroad would help more people, not just synths
  • considers you his “meat shield”
  • struggles with self-esteem issues; doing better after the “idolizes you” conversation
  • there is no way to turn off the sass, unless it’s combated with sadness
  • super grumpy about drug use
  • will stoop to making dick jokes (specifically at Strong)
  • has history with Piper and getting bombarded with questions, to which he always responds “no comment”
  • makes train noises

These are a few facts I’ve learned about Deacon from his in-game chit-chat. Feel free to reblog with more facts that you have learned! But keep it all canon! :)

  • Every Self-Proclaimed "Meat Lover" White Dude On A Food Network Competition: BACON!!!!!!!!!!
  • Same Dudes After They Get Cut: I just DON'T GET IT! I said BACON like FIFTEEN TIMES! I seasoned my dish with nothing but BACON to ~give it depth~! The main protein was BACON! I SCREAMED "BACON" INTO EACH JUDGE'S EAR! I HORKED DOWN AN ENTIRE POUND OF RAW BACON LIKE A SEAGULL CHOKING DOWN A WHOLE FISH! WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME????!!!!!!!