measuring goodness

Tumblr: the ultimate helicopter mom
  • Me: *posts about being thirsty*
  • Tumblr: oh my god you could have diabetes
  • Me: no I don't have diabetes I'm just thirsty
  • Tumblr: you should go to the doctor and find a therapist too. Here are some hotlines for good measure. Remember to call 911 if you get too thirsty
  • Me: I have a therapist and I'm just thirsty look I got water I'm fine now
  • Tumblr: you should eat leafy greens and take multivitamins just to make sure
  • Me: no I'm literally okay I'm sorry I said anything
  • Tumblr: don't take this so lightly. You're thirsty, that's not normal. Maybe it's your kidneys... try lemon water daily and do 57 jumping jacks every three Wednesdays
  • Me: fam it's a human thing if you don't drink enough you get thirsty
  • Tumblr: no no no let me still give you my opinion tho
  • Me: it's all good
  • Tumblr: *insert essay about the dangers and health implications of thirst*
  • Me: guys I'm literally fine
  • Tumblr: you should take a break from everything for awhile
  • Me: sometimes physical symptoms are just stress or your body doing its thing, not everything is a huge mystery to be untangled by tumblr
  • Tumblr: would you say that if you weren't dying of diabetes and vitamin D deficiency and hyperthyroidism and probably anemia too
  • Me: I'm F I N E
  • Tumblr: but ru really?
  • Me: yes
  • Tumblr: lemme send you some links to medical tests you should have done
  • Me: omg I'm ok
  • Tumblr: my friend had your symptoms and it turns out she's allergic to the sun, so watch out, you should get that checked
  • Me: I'm not allergic to the sun I was just thirsty
  • Tumblr: that's what you think
  • Me: *internally screams* I'm not! I was being lazy and not getting water -
  • Tumblr: *gasp* laziness?! Why didn't you tell me *opens up new tab of webmd* this could be so many other things now
  • Me: what am I supposed to do then
  • Tumblr: listen to my sage advice and pretend it was solicited
  • Me: I'm just trying to blog about my life and watch Netflix. Also I want candy
  • Tumblr: oh no. Oh no, that's no good. That's a bad sign. You should cut all eggs out of your diet and make an appointment with an ENT doctor
  • Me: *cries in frustration*
  • Tumblr: oh no you have depression too!!!!! Get a psychiatrist right away
  • Me: NO
  • Tumblr: *sidles up via instant message* I didn't wanna say this in a reblog but it could be...
Stammering Youth

based off this post 

This is totally Kate @supernaturaldoctorpotter fault for this…soz

~~ First day in the dormitories ~~

~~ Few days later in the Boy’s Dormitory ~~

-insert a string of other British swears that I don’t know and maybe a little bit of Welsh thrown in for good measure-

~FIN

Understanding a Shame Based Identity

Shame is the deeply held belief that, at core, there is something wrong with me. So, no matter what I do, or how hard I try, I’ll never measure up and be good enough. Thus, I expect other people to reject me in the end, and deep down inside I reject myself.

If I have a shame based identity, I am likely to battle with the following feelings:

- Feeling like a fraud

- Feeling like I have to cover up all the time

- Fear of being exposed for who and what I truly am

- Feeling powerless

- Feeling as if I don’t have, or deserve, a voice

- Wishing I could just disappear

- Feeling vulnerable

- Feeling very needy – and perhaps too needy, compared to other people

- Feeling like I always disappoint myself and others.

The “shame bound” person is constantly struggling against these persistent and negative feelings. They are triggered easily, and by innocuous triggers, such as being overlooked or contradicted by a friend. This can then result in a powerful “shame attack” that is so intense that we’re completely paralysed, and overwhelmed, by a sense of worthlessness. These feelings can persist for days, for weeks or even months.

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Bates Motel | Proof Alex Romero Gives The Best Hugs | @anextrapart & @jq37

#exhibitsAthroughZ

FUN GIFTS FOR THE MILLENNIAL IN YOUR LIFE THIS HOLIDAY SEASON
  1. dinosaur onesie! keep them cozy in this super cute gift
  2. A return to a stable housing market! fulfill their wildest dreams by allowing them to survive by themselves :)
  3. satisfy the nerd in them with pokemon sun and moon!
  4. an end to police brutality :) 
  5. music and theatre lovers alike will get a huge kick from hamilton tickets! throw in the mixtape for good measure, followed by the moana soundtrack!
  6. student loan forgiveness and a stable job! what’s cuter than not drowning in debt? 
  7. our “miscellaneous” friend is the hardest to shop for… surprise her big-time by deprivatizing medicine, education, and prisons :)
  8. chicken nugget gift card. whether it’s the ol’ mcdonald’s or some fancy place he’s always talking about, following up with food is always a good idea.
  9. if the electoral college fails to remove trump from office, do the right thing this holiday season. it’s a classic. i’m not going to say it, but you know what it is. remember to turn your flamethrower on “low” for a nice, even roast, which is sure to please.
Series of Unfortunate Events curse

-Make a witches ladder and tie it to your target however you’d like (hair, name, etc)

-Tie in items that relate to unlucky things 

  • used up travel toothpaste-> they never seem to have toothpaste when they need it
  • a key with a ‘?’ drawn in sharpie-> you’re gonna be late to work, douche
  • empty battery-> they’re always just too tired to really get any work done
  • loose pieces of yarn-> so they always have that one strand of hair tickling their arm
  • a pushpin-> step on something sharp, asshole
  • a ripped piece of paper with the words “REALLY IMPORTANT THING”->so they always forget that one really important thing
  • an empty toilet roll-> every. single. time.
  • broken birthday candle->nobody remembers their birthday

Charge that sucker with your annoyed motherfucking energy and swirl some fucking smoke on it with a few spritzes of cayenne water for good measure. 

Now stuff it in an old sock and forget about it. Or hang it up. You do you.