mean google

super-skid  asked:

What if Google Prime (Blue) was like the tired parent to the secondary Googles. Like Yellow buys and listens to music from the google play store, Red watches YouTube videos all day and gets into fights in the comments. And Green is always online playing video games and chatting with his friends. And poor Blue has the hardest time just getting them all focused on one thing because the three of them are distracted by every cool new thing they see.

Oh man, that would be such a hassle for poor Google Prime if that’s the case!
But I’d like to think that even if he was the tired parent, he’s the one that keeps up with the norms, you know? Like he listens to the other Googles no matter different their tastes and interests are, and in turn just gets to be updated. Also, if that’s the case, that would mean (by the color sequence of my last Google color analysis) the apps with all their colors could mean they were bonding!

Google Chrome, their home. Google Photos, their pictures together, shenanigans and memories safely stored in Google Drive! Oh that’d be so sweet!

Also by this he would also be that parent, even he doesn’t gossip around, knows a lot of stuff because of great connections. Not only to the secondary Googles for the main stuff, but also to the other egos, if so. News local to international from the Jims, games and other shows from Bim Trimmer, talk shows and entertainment personalities from Wilford, et cetera.

This is amazing and cute and I like it :D

Learning Divination
  • Day 1: wow i can't wait until i get to a point where I can figure all this out with ease! I hate having to look up symbols and meanings all the time!
  • 3 years later: *staring into a tea cup, holding three books about symbols, and googling the meanings all at the same time* literally what the fuck
The beginner witch's starter spell kit

So I know most of you just starting off feel pressured to go and get a load of equipment to use in spells, and while I still believe it’s not strictly necessary to have spell ingredients and tools and words and intent alone are enough to suffice, I can understand wanting stuff to make you feel more witchy and to help you visualise stuff better etc.

So here are the bare basic things I recommend 😊

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✨ a quartz crystal

Why?

- Because they are self cleansing - you never need to spiritually cleanse them

- because they are neutral - you can charge them with any intent you want and they will be able to carry them

- they can be used to cleanse - use it to cleanse yourself, use it to cleanse any other items you have

- they help transmit energy - perfect for helping you send energy to something or someone else

- they receive energy - perfect for channeling energy

- they amplify energy - use them to increase the power of anything else you are using in your magic

- cheap af

- completely innocuous - no one’s gonna look at it and think you must be a witch


Where?

Like literally fucking anywhere - go into a gift shop and you can probably find a Quartz crystal even if it’s on the end of a keyring or if it’s part of a gemstone chip bracelet, sometimes in the gift section of bookshops, in the birth stone section of a card shop, in most seaside gift shops, in museum gift shops, as a free gift on the front of a mind, body, spirit magazine….

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✨ a feather

Why?

- it’s free af

- depending on the bird it can represent different things - Google bird meanings and omens etc

- represents the element of air

- use in cleansing spells by wafting around (yup. Simple as that - think feather dusters - cleansing!)

- comes from birds - birds fly- use in astral travel spells. Birds nest - use in home spells. Birds are free to roam where they want - use in freedom / release spells… Pretty damn versatile if you ask me!

- bonus - pretty, soft, fluffy

Where?

Literally walk out your front door, there’s probably one waiting for you right there. If not, try the back door.

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✨ a stone

Why?

- again, free af

- represents earth element

- comes from ground and therefore can help you in grounding spells

- the phrase ‘solid as a rock?’ - use in spells that help you stabilise and settle down in life

- what can stones be used for? Building bridges, paths and buildings - use in spells that help you cross metaphorical bridges, that help you find your path, to help you lay foundations etc

Where?

Again, literally anywhere

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✨ water (including some sort of bowl, jar, bottle, whatever… To hold said water)

Why?

- free

- represents water element

- use in cleansing spells

- water represents emotions - use in any spell that deals with emotions

- still water is calming, use in calming spells

- bonus - research different types of water and how to use in witchcraft because sea water, rain water etc can all be used for different things but as a standard simply use tap water

Where

- sea
- collect rain
- river
- the tap????

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✨ a battery operated tea light candle

Why?

- discreet and small - easy to hide away if necessary

- no need for lighter or matches

- safe af

- lasts longer than a real candle

- represents fire

- usually really cheap for a multipack

- most come with realistic flicker effect

- can get in different colours so can be used as an alternative to spell candles

- bonus - if you’re willing to spend a little more you can now get them in the style of church candles or taper candles and some of them have a sensor on them which lets you ‘blow them out’

- can be used for enlightening spells, passion, energising or any kind of candle spell

- nice to look at when meditating

- looks great in a candle holder

- safe to use as markers for you circle if you want to work within one and won’t matter if you’re clumsy af like me and knock it over


Where?

DIY stores, home stores, gift shops, clothes shops with home sections… Practically EVERYWHERE at Christmas… Most likely a pound / thrift store?

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🌸 Can I just point out you now have an item to represent all of the elements? How fricking awesome is that?? You can use any kind of elemental spell now! Yay!🌸

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✨ salt

Why?

- use in protection spells

- use to cleanse

- cheap

- use in your bath to soothe sore, aching muscles, or to soften dry skin or hard nails


Where?

- any food shop

- most likely your kitchen

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✨ black pepper (corns or ground)

Why?

- great for binding spells

- use to absorb negativity

- cheap af


Where?

Again, food store or probably already in your kitchen

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✨ a notebook

Why?

- to jot down spells, your research, correspondences etc

Where?

Pretty much anywhere. You don’t need to spend a lot of money on it. Chances are after practicing for a little while you’ll settle down more into your own personal craft and realise a lot of the stuff you wrote down won’t be relevant to you and your beliefs any more and then by that point you will have been able to save up for a nice new fancy one and you can copy over the stuff you want to keep 😊

Take it from me, there is literally no point in spending loads of money on your first spell book, you will definitely out grow it.

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✨ either a cheap multi-pack of different coloured cotton reels or ribbon

- use for string / ribbon magic (a very easy form of magic for beginners)

- use in binding spells


Where?

You could go to a craft shop but honestly, just go to your local pound / thrift shop or market to pick one up for £1. Craft shops will no doubt charge you more than you have to pay

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✨ some form of tiny draw string cloth pouch or the fabric to make one

Why?

- use for making charm bags with

Where?

if you’re lucky you might be given one when you buy your Quartz crystal - people usually put crystals in little drawstring pouches, a lot of jewellery from eBay come in them too

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So there you have it!

At the very most all you’ll be buying is a notebook, salt and pepper if you don’t already have it, a Quartz crystal, some cotton, a battery tea light and a tiny bag.

You should easy be able to get that for under £10 especially if you buy everything you can from a pound store!

If you want to start practicing divination, you could always get a pack of playing cards from there too and learn how to divine using them - that knowledge is only a Google search away!

How easy (and cheap) was that?

You’ll probably find that as you go on, the longer you practice you’ll probably add to your collection over time and then you’ll start making the occasional bigger purchase as a treat, you might want to buy some tarot cards for example…

But this should be more than enough to start you off! 😊

And you can keep them all hidden in a little box under your bed and no one needs to know anything about it if you don’t want them too 💕

AU where instead of going to Samwell, Jack starts a widely successful Publicly Broadcast show for children.

Jack learns that he is great with kids after coaching them for a little over two years. Moreover, kids are good with Jack. There is no pressure to be anything other than who he is.


It all starts with a local news program doing a fluff piece on Jack Zimmermann’s coaching ability. But then it turned into something completely different when Jack skated onto camera and started to introduce every single one of his kids and what was special about them. He was…really enchanting actually. He didn’t ever really talk down to them. Jack just treated them as a tiny friend. 

They ARE his tiny friends, but that’s not the point. 

The footage they got of “snack time” was really the best. Imagine a good 16 kids piled around this massive man teaching them the best way to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. 

 It should have been obvious that a local channel would contact him. It still surprises Jack. They want him to host a show? Why? Everyone always teased him about how impersonable he was during interviews. Is it because he’s Jack Zimmermann’s son? Or Alicia’s? 

Jack asks all of these questions to his mother and she just laughs. “You made a PB&J interesting to 16 kids just by being you”

Jack figures it wouldn’t hurt to give it a shot. 

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